-Part 9-
Too Much Damage
It happened in an instant. A strange sensation hit her as Ino's body slumped to the floor. Katy couldn't... find herself. Her mind whirled and she was in the dark, her senses clouded. It was as if she was being blinded and gagged by smoke.
It was not Katy's will that made her drop her weapon. The ice shattered and melted on the ground without her energy to keep it cold and strong. She tried to take back control of her body, but it was useless.
"Hey," Ino's voice echoed within. "Thanks for letting me hang out in your mind. Now, if you'd be so… kind..."
Her words faded off and the next thing Katy knew she was falling, falling, and then floating. She felt as if she were spinning again before it all stopped suddenly and she could see Ino. The scene played out like she was watching from behind a screen.
The blonde girl stood in fields of green grass atop a hill. A tree with weeping leaves stood not too far away from her. Confusion and alarm projected from the kunoichi's face. She glanced around her, but there were only trees in the distance, circling the fields. No one was around and everything was eerily still except for the swaying branches of the drooping tree.
"What's going on? This…" Her tongue faltered with nervousness. "This isn't how it's supposed to work!"
Something moved beneath the tree's canopy.
Ino cautiously stepped forward while squinting her eyes to discern what it was. It stepped forward and she saw the figure of a woman wearing strange blue and white clothing through the rustling leaves.
A loud screech vibrated throughout the air.
Everything turned colorless and cold. Frost clung to every surface, every blade of grass. White skeletons of creatures unknown ripped up from the ground and Ino's wide eyes darted between all of them. There must have been at least a hundred. There was another screech and a bright light came from under the tree where the woman was now weeping.
A cerulean creature erupted out from the canopy, diving for Ino.
She screamed.
Katy felt herself spinning again before she found herself back in the arena. Ino was lying face down. With great struggle she raised her face. Katy observed the small traces of frost clinging to her cheeks with growing disturbance.
"How can… you h – have another… spirit in you...?" the girl stammered, gasping for air.
She groaned before going limp and quiet.
Murmurs could be heard all around. All Katy could do was stand frozen and bewildered.
"What just happened?" She heard Naruto loudly question.
Hayate coughed roughly into his hand before speaking. "Since her opponent is unable to go on, the winner is Katy."
Anna raised her fisted into the air, cheering loudly. Mae smiled, choosing to celebrate inaudibly.
The spectators were flabbergasted. They weren't sure what exactly happened but she won. The sensei of the Yamanaka came down to carry her back to her concerned teammates, scratching his head in confusion.
Katy limped as quickly as she could past the medical ninja that tried to stop her. They didn't try very hard, instead just shrugged as she shoved by them, keeping her head down.
She did not trust medical ninja.
Anna was quick to meet her by the bottom of the stairs and helped her up them. Katy leaned up against the wall and let out an agonized sigh. She'd be glad when this was all over.
Mae stood close to her leaking wound as Anna crudely wrapped bandages around her waist to still the bleeding.
Pain. There was too much of it.
Katy closed her eyes and let the tears sting behind her eyelids. She wanted to snap out at Anna at that moment. She was the one making her go through this. But no, she reminded herself, Anna did not do this to her. Timorously, Katy sneaked a glance over at Gaara. She couldn't see much of his expression from the side but he stood tall, his arms crossed in front of him. The one cyan eye she could see held nothing.
He did not glance at her. He was not concerned. He created her wound and he wasn't even sorry. Anger festered in her core. How dare he…
The next matches served to distract her from the growing sickness she felt within. Temari, finally a name to go with the face, proved she was just as ruthless as her brothers, beating Tenten without breaking a sweat and treating her like a dog. Thankfully, the brown haired girl's teammate came to the rescue. He wore green and had round-shaped eyes.
He berated the Sand kunoichi. "What is wrong with you? She may have lost but that is no way to treat an opponent who has done her best!"
Although Katy barely knew him, she already held him in high esteem for that. He stood up for his friend and she had to agree with him, Temari was being disrespectful. One could call her a sore winner.
When she called Tenten a sack of garbage, the green-clad boy went on the attack. Her fan blocked his kick and she taunted him more, insulting his appearance. Katy glared down at the kunoichi.
"What a jerk," Mae quietly muttered Katy's exact thoughts.
"Lee, stop!"
The green boy's sensei came down to break it up. He called him Gai-sensei, and Katy could tell they were very close as they held nearly the same appearance. For a moment she dared to wonder if they were father and son.
"Temari, get up here," Gaara called down to his sister. "Forget them, you won. Why are you wasting your time with that pathetic loser and his ridiculous mentor?"
Katy cringed at his harsh words.
"What?" Lee hissed.
"It's all right, Lee." Gai put a hand on Lee's shoulder. "You up there, I wouldn't be so cocky if I were you. Lee is stronger than he looks."
The Sand ninja glared down at him defiantly and the tension in the atmosphere tripled its thickness until it was almost like breathing sludge. It dissipated only a little as Lee and Gai returned up the stairs.
Katy kept glancing at the standoffish siblings as a guy named Shikamaru took the floor.
He won, showing everyone that smarts were more useful to have than brawn.
Katy didn't like dogs, so when the Inuzuka mocked Naruto during their fight, she decided she liked them even less. She wanted to support Naruto, especially after Kiba ridiculed his dream of becoming Hokage, but failed to gather the courage to do so.
The brunette was on edge through the entire fight. Kiba's beast mimicry reminded her of a vicious dog and Akamaru might have been more feral than Brandy, the rottweiler that attacked her when she was little.
It was tough but Naruto came through. He showed everyone he's not the loser they believed him to be. Katy wanted to run over and hug him. She restrained the urge, however, as pain seared through her.
"Look, Katy." Anna nudged her. "The chick that likes me is fighting her sister!"
They were both Hyuuga, one of the most prestigious clans in the Leaf. Was this setup really chosen at random? Before they traded blows, Neji talked down to his cousin and psychologically attacked her.
Every word Neji had said still hung in Katy's mind. It was like he was talking about her, not his cousin. You're too kind and gentle. You seek harmony and avoid conflict. No confidence, you feel inferior to everyone else here. You didn't even want to take part in these exams but your teammates did, and you couldn't bear to let them down...
Katherine averted her eyes from the Byakugan. He had described her exactly. She did feel inferior; she was inferior. But... she had to be here for her friends. There wasn't much she was good at, and she knew it. But if there was one thing she couldn't fail at, it was being a good friend. It was her only skill, her only natural talent. She couldn't let Neji's harsh words get to her, she had to be strong and push ahead like that Hinata girl was doing now.
Even though she lost, she proved that she was strong. Still, Katy felt so bad for the girl. Was that how she was going to end up? Trying her hardest but being beaten and cast down anyway? It was tough to think about.
But then, Katy saw something that absolutely captivated her. Gaara's expression... it demonstrated grief or sympathy. Compassion, there was compassion in his expression. Katy's eyes went big. Perhaps his heart hadn't been erased after all!
Mae quietly voiced her concerns for the shy Hyuuga as she was taken into medical care and Anna, like Naruto, had to yell at Neji. Her voice was mocking as she imitated being him. "Hey! Hey! My name is Neji Hyuuga and I'm constipated with destiny!"
Sticking her head out from behind Katy, Mae joined in the mockery, exerting an outlandish noise. "Ah-Hurr!"
Katy covered her own mouth, as if she was the one that emitted the sound. People would most likely think she produced Mae's strange noise. The embarrassment just caused her to snicker. She hadn't noticed Kankuro going past her to move to the other side. Though Anna noticed, and she glared nails into his skin. Just what was he up to?
Her emerald eyes move to the flashing electronic screen. The toughest opponents were left and Anna was glad no one of her team would be fighting them. She'd never admit it, though. "Oh, look, the next contestants."
Katy followed her friend's stare. Her eyes bulged. Gaara materialized down in a swirl of sand and Lee enthusiastically jumped down to face him.
The Leaf's dragon and the Sand's tiger were about to collide.
Be careful, Katy thought.
The image of the carnage in the forest flashed in her mind. What he did to those Rain ninja...
The battle began, and the sand shielded Gaara from Lee's strikes. But then horror struck the brunette. Why was he talking like that? He hadn't had enough blood, he said, and the hope that he was still the friend she knew was, once again, vanishing.
A sand cloud was throwing around Lee and it seemed he would succumb to it... until he took off his weights. He was so fast; Katy couldn't believe it, nor could many of the others. Gai wasn't kidding when he said he was strong. Lee was giving the redhead a run for his money. Katherine felt a prick in her chest when he struck Gaara and knocked him back. He got up slowly, sand falling from his face. Then...
"What. The. Heck." Anna gaped.
In that moment, Katy's heart froze over. The expression on his face was terrifying. His teeth were bared in a malicious grin and his bloodshot eyes were wide, just like the night he attacked her. Katherine's side roared in pain at the reminder.
"An armor like shell of sand," Calypso noted to the girl. "No need to be alarmed."
Apparently nothing disturbed the phantom. Katy knocked herself out of her reverie, returning her gaze to Lee. He was using something called Initial Lotus. He kicked the crimson haired shinobi up into the air before gabbing him, and they spun down rapidly.
Katy held her breath. They both crashed down, dust and debris overtaking the area. Lee leapt out, unharmed. Hazel eyes frantically scanned the floor for Gaara. She found him, and she nearly cried out. His eyes were wide and his mouth open, cracks spanned all over his body. He looked like a fractured porcelain doll.
"You did it! Way to go, Lee!"
Kat mentally raged at the pink haired girl before gawking in terror at her friend. He was crumbling! Right before her very eyes, her precious friend was crumbling away. Dread and panic consumed her.
"It is just the shell, child. Calm yourself."
The phantom was right, as the real Gaara appeared behind Lee, laughing darkly. It was a laugh that sent chills coursing down Katy's spine.
The sand crashed down and beat on Lee. He was being battered mercilessly. Katy slowly shook her head. She was being yanked between her concern for Lee and her concern for Gaara. She wanted it to stop.
It wouldn't stop.
Not the boy I knew. Who are you?
The tender smile of the young crimson haired boy flashed before her, his arms opened and reaching for her, and his soft gaze gently calling her. Had that boy disappeared? Was he gone?
Please... don't fade away...
+.+.+
The final competitors stood in a line before the Hokage.
Katy kept to the far end with Anna, away from Gaara. She hated to avoid him like this but... what happened to Lee. He had put up an amazing fight, and Katy even feared for Gaara at one point... until he crushed Lee's arm and leg. Katy wanted to cry out for him to stop but it was too late. Gai had to step in to stop Lee from being killed.
When teacher embraced his precious student, the redhead looked on with something that was akin to jealousy in his eyes. Perhaps, for a millisecond, he saw a small brunette holding his younger self. It quickly passed and he returned to where his sister stood in a whirl of sand.
Katy watched the medics take Lee away, sorrow encasing her. Naruto had been even more upset than she.
The last match between Dosu and Chouji wasn't worth thinking about. However, Dosu's abilities with sound were remarkable, and might spell trouble for Katy and her water techniques.
Water was a great conductor for sound.
As the Hokage explained the finals, she kept thinking back to Lee. She swallowed, ashamed. It was her Geliebt that did that. She considered visiting him in the hospital later, to see if there was anything she could do.
The candidates pulled their numbers from a box and that ultimately chose their opponents. Naruto vs. Neji, Gaara vs. Sasuke, Kankuro vs. Shino, Katy vs. Dosu, and Temari vs. Shikamaru with 'Oreo' branching off their section. Whoever won that round would have to fight an extra match with Anna.
Katy stiffened. She'd be going up against Dosu. She pressed her lips together tightly in a firm line. They had a month to train; she would have to work hard. But first...
She cast a sidelong glance at Gaara.
She had something important to do, something important to find out.
+.+.+
Her steps echoed off the wood paneling. Long, rectangular windows lined one side of the hallway that seemed to span on forever. The setting sun seeped its light through the widows and set the hall ablaze with a warm, eerie, reddish glow. She didn't know why she was there; she just knew she had to keep walking. Waiting up ahead was a boy with scarlet hair. He was garbed in black, a strange expression on his face. She picked up her pace, going towards him. A panicked cry reverberated out from behind her. She looked over her shoulder to see her dark-haired niece. She couldn't understand what she was saying, her mouth was moving but no words came out. Her face had fear written all over it.
She stopped, looking forward to the boy again. An impious sheen burned in his sea-foam orbs, his smile seeming perverse and crazed. It made the blackness around his eyes appear darker. Despite this, she had a strong urge to go to him. Yet the panic she saw in her niece kept her still, motionless. Then, sand slithered its way down the hall and detained her...
Katherine awoke with a start. She stared up at the ceiling of her room, dazed. What a weird dream. She sat up from her bed. The three girls had put a lot of work into their house and finally got their own rooms in order. Though, Kat felt strange sleeping away from her real home, Haven. She sighed; she wouldn't be getting back to sleep. Glancing out the window, she decided now was a good time as any to go confront him. She planned to do it tomorrow but... She had to make him see, and the sooner the better.
She dressed quietly, but before she snuck out the door, she was reminded of something.
She got a piece of paper and a pen. What she was writing was a prayer. Sometimes she found it easier to write her prayers out to God rather than speak. She alternated between writing and talking. It was what she had been doing since she was seven. She had prayed as often as she could for her Geliebt and her other loved ones.
...Complicated circumstances have clouded his view and I'm afraid I won't have the words that he needs to hear. I pray for Your wisdom and a heart that's sincere. I want so much to help him...
She wrote fervently, and soon had the whole page filled out. She placed down her pencil and tucked the paper in an old cluttered desk before slipping out the door. Her side didn't hurt as much now. They had fixed it up some more. The healing powers of medical ninja were truly astounding. Though she didn't like doctors, she knew when to be thankful.
Help me find him...
"This is not a good idea. Listen to me, child. He is not the boy you once knew. Is that not obvious? You are the little fawn walking straight into the jaws of the tiger!"
"I have to try again! This time I'll get through to him! Just help me find him," she hissed, marching onwards. "You promised you'd never separate me from anyone ever again! Is your bloody word meaningless like everyone else's?"
She could almost feel it shifting within her. "Stubborn child. Fine. But do not freeze up like before!"
He was on top of a different building. She didn't stop to think, didn't give herself the time to reconsider. Calypso was protesting enough as it was. All aspects were similar to her first altercation with him, but this time she'd not lose her voice. This time she'd show him she was his friend.
His pale eyes slid over to her, searing stare locking on. An uneasy feeling twisted in her gut and that strange dream played in her mind. She swallowed her fear, moving closer. This was something she had to do, no matter how foolish it may seem. She had to see if her friend was still in there. They stared at each other, neither saying anything for a while. His face was vacant of any real emotion; hers had it painfully splayed across her features.
"Why did you come back?"
"I..." She steeled herself, determination washing over. "I told you. I told you I'd be back. I'm keeping my promise. Don't you remember?"
He narrowed his eyes, a dangerous sign. In place of fear, frustration built up in the girl. She stomped her foot forward in stubbornness, she was not backing down. Not this time. This time, she would make him see he was not alone, that he had a friend. Maybe then he'd see the truth and become good again.
"Just listen! Please..." Her irritation lessened, overthrown by a great sense of sadness. "I know, Geliebt, I let you down. I wasn't there for you, I should have been. I wanted to be. I'm sorry, but the portal was sealed. No one could get through. I tried so many times to get to you! It wouldn't let you through either, would it?"
His eyes widened, black lids receding. Pictures of a pristine little forest and farm passed through his mind. The green fields, the creek of the woods, the fall leaves, and the sparkling snow; they were all of the same place. "Haven..."
"Yes," she replied softly. "We can go back there, you know. Anytime you want. You have... you have a family there, remember? They'll welcome you with open arms."
The scarlet haired boy went ridged, slowly moving to bring his head into his hands.
Family... they were all sitting around the table, together. Snow blanketed the fields, but there was a warm place with them, warmth he had once dreamed of.
"I need you to know," she went on, "That you're loved. You're... you're my friend and I love you and I want you to be okay. I... I have been praying for you for so long. I never felt right when you were gone!"
She stepped nearer, pouring her heart out to the friend she held so dear. "I loved making you smile, making you laugh. I kept looking for ways to make you happy. 'Cause when you were happy, I was happy too. And I remember the way your people treated you. It was wrong. They were wrong to treat you like that! And I... I always wanted to take away all your pain – I still do! I'm sorry I was away for… for too long. But now I've come back and... I'm here for you! I'm your friend!"
She finished breathlessly, her arms held open in a gesture of honesty. Gaara remained silent, his eyes wide and body tense. He seemed to be thinking over her words. A muscle flexed in his jaw as his stare hardened again. He stood steadily, sternly.
"Love," he spit out the words, "Family. Friendship. Those words mean nothing to me. The only ties I have with anyone are the ones I'd like to wrap around their necks. They are only bonds of hatred. You shouldn't have come here. Now, you're going to die."
Katy was taken aback, speechless as sand hissed out of the gourd. Calypso stirred. "Time to go, child."
"But...!" She blinked. "We... we were... You called me your most precious friend; you called me Geliebt! You… you protected me," she ended weakly.
His sea-foam eyes opened wide, bloodshot, a wicked gleam covering them as they burned intensely inside their dark circles. His canines were prominent as he bared them in a malevolent, demented grin.
"No," she whispered. It was like her dream. Even her subconscious had warned her. He was not the same person she knew.
Sand surged forward, clashing with a wave of icy water. It was Calypso's doing, Katy knew. Regardless of who it was controlling the liquid, the challenge only served to excite the bloodthirsty shinobi. He snarled as more sand moved. Fog was creeping in around them; the temperature was diving.
Katy stumbled back as sand and water collided again. It sounded like a storm at the side of the sea. The girl ducked, covering her head with her arms. Water and sand sprayed out, raining down, and the rooftop had suddenly become the center of a maelstrom.
Everything was going so wrong...
Hot water welled in her eyes. "Gaara..."
"It is time to go! Child, Katherine! Now!"
Her world was dividing. With tears in her eyes, she bolted. Her heart tore itself apart. The sadistic glee she saw in his face... was that what he'd become? Was that really him inside? Wet salinity streamed down, cutting through wet sand that stuck to her face. She maneuvered her way through the fog, running as a fawn would while the phantom doe lashed out watery attacks to stave off the malicious tiger.
"Keep running, child! Do not look back!" it prompted urgently from within. "Keep running!"
She obeyed, having no other choice.
+.+.+
Katherine leaned up against a tree, far from where he was. She brought her arms around her, checking for harm done. She as cold and wet, a thin film of soggy sand coated her hair, shoulders, and arms from the spray of attacks. There were no injuries except that of a few scrapes along her forearms. No serious injuries... physically.
But damage was done to the heart.
She blinked repeatedly, trying to ward it off. Then the dam broke and she snapped, convulsing with sobs. The sad cries echoed in the empty night, the empty forest. The phantom took form, materializing out of the broken girl's body. Its dead stare bored into her as she wept. It kept silent, waiting.
Deep in the night,
The bright veil of yesteryear deceived your judgment,
You thought everything would be all right.
"It's," she gasped," It's not fair! It's not..."
She broke down again. The ghostly doe waited. Finally, eventually, she was calm enough to talk.
"Did he forget me...? Or does he just h – hate me? I... I thought I could help him, but now, I..." She blinked away another onslaught of tears. "Did you see him? It's like, no matter what I do or say, he's been damaged and he will always be damaged! There's just too much!"
She slid down the rough bark of the trunk. "I can't fix it... I can't. Was it worthless? I accepted him – I loved him! I called him Geliebt! And yet I... I can't make his pain go away...?"
She traced the shooting star marred on her hand, her expression clouded in memories. "When he was sad, I held him. An – and when I screamed, he came running to defend me. We held each other up..."
Its eyes were impassive, even as it contemplated her words."...Do you not understand, child? I thought you would have seen it by now. The boy you knew is gone, dead. All that remains is a shell that those people transformed into a killing machine. A shinobi."
"What...?" she breathed weakly. Dead? He was dead? "No, he can't be..."
There was no response. The phantom, having said what it needed to, vanished back into her body. Katy quivered violently, whether from cold or shock, as Calypso's testimony ricocheted in her psyche.
They killed him; he was dead.
Pray for the friend you lost along the way...
Fresh tears spilled over, and she slowly began rocking herself back and forth. She failed. She had failed to be a good friend. She wasn't there to save him; she wasn't even there to help ease his suffering at the end.
She closed her eyes, the image of a red haired child emerging in her mind's eye. His sad, pleading gaze. His reaching arms, calling for her. His kind, gentle smile.
It was all fading...
+.+.+
A/N: Any feedback on my writing style, how I can improve, or any advice in general you can offer will be appreciated. Review, yes?
