Chapter 9

Tien thinks you're pretty when you smile, mother!

For the hundredth time that night Tinoco's lilting voice echoed in Isabel's head, along with a replay of the stunned look on Tenshinhan's handsome face as though the girl had snatched the thought from his very mind.

Isabel snorted. She probably did.

Then she felt the blood rush to her cheeks. Well, his smile ain't so bad, either… The loud music of the club had kept her from delving into a deep self-analysis of their time at the beach today, something she would eventually have to do. As a result, only pleasant memories flitted across her mind, like the delight in his eyes when he caught her teasing him, or the way he called Tinoco 'kitten', or how the heat radiated off his heavy chest, even through the cold of the water…

She was forced to see her nemesis in a new light, and it left her conflicted, confused, nervous… Try though she might to maintain her righteous indignation, he was eroding down her barriers, one by one.

And it was because he loved Tinoco as much as she did.

Well, she thought as she considered his patient nature, and kind expression, that and everything else about him. After years of maintaining her hatred for him, she was finally losing momentum. All of a sudden, it just didn't seem to matter anymore.

Feeling a girlish giddiness that Isabel hadn't felt in years, she left work that night with her head in the clouds. She went through the mechanics of the trek home, though she probably could have been sleepwalking for all that she paid attention. Fortunately, she arrived without incident.

When she opened the door to the apartment, her breath caught in her throat from what she saw.

Tenshinhan had fallen asleep on the sofa, and curled up on his chest like a cat on a rug, was a snoring Tinoco. Her white, frilly pajamas by some coincidence matched his shirt, and her hair had been sloppily braided behind her head. He had one giant hand resting lightly on her back, and she rose and fell with each of his breaths, as comfortable and natural with him as a babe in the womb.

She watched the tender scene, almost mesmerized, her feelings for this man bombarding her whether she was ready for them or not. And her mental tumble left her with one terrifying conclusion. She was-

"Mmm…" His eyes fluttered open, and a small smile tipped the corners of his lips. "Hey," he whispered lazily, and then closed his lids again. It was one word, but for some reason it gave her butterflies, and she wondered how it would feel if she were the one curled up on his chest, with his warm arm draped across her shoulders…

Isabel shook herself. It's late. Damn head's not screwed on straight. She walked over and slid her arms under Tinoco. Her daughter shifted as she picked her up.

"Mam�" she muttered as she rested her head sleepily on Isabel's shoulder.

"Hey, angel." She briskly carried the girl to her room where Tyrone was nestled on top of the covers. Isabel laid Tinoco gently down next to the big cat and covered her up. Then with a kiss on both of their foreheads she exited quietly and closed the door.

Tien was sitting up, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands when she walked back in the front room. "How was work?" he asked quietly, looking at her with sleepy eyes.

Well, she thought crazily, I couldn't concentrate because I was thinking about you the entire time. "It was work."

"No brawls to break up?"

She shrugged. "Not on a week night."

"Hmm…" This was usually the part where he got up and left, or if he didn't, it was the part where she would tell him to leave. But tonight was different. She almost found herself inviting him to stay.

"Do you like working there?" he asked suddenly, meeting her gaze with curious eyes.

"Like it?" she snorted. "It's a job. I'd rather be home with my daughter just like any other decent mother."

He looked contemplative then, despite his heavy lids. She was suddenly very curious as to what he was thinking. After several moments of silence, he rested his hands on the sofa as though for support, and took a deep breath.

"Isabel…"

She waited.

"I…I was thinking."

She blinked. "…yes?"

"Well, my friend Chaotzu…" he proceeded to say something about going to live in a palace, but she missed the details.

At the mention of Tenshinhan's comrade, a visual of the only time she'd seen the clown-faced boy shackled her awareness, forcing her to suddenly remember the worst day of her life in brutal detail. And with it came old sentiments, an acute sense of injustice, and an oath of revenge…

It only snowballed from there, picking up momentum as she relived every other chink in her happiness that this man before her had somehow caused, had stolen from her…

Thief, brute, murderer, rapist…

Suddenly the audacity of her earlier affections for him manifested itself in horrified denial, and Isabel began to tremble.


.

Tien's words trailed off as he noticed the change in her demeanor. When she started to shake, his gut instinct was to comfort her, but something about the way she was looking at him rendered him immobile. A dread chill spun down his spine like a spider, and he sat there, waiting for the maelstrom in her eyes to be expressed with invective.

She spun her back to him, and her words came trailing from her body like an ignited fuse. "You know, Tenshinhan, I never saw you walk away the day you paralyzed my father…"

Oh no…

"When you threw me into the crowd like a rag doll, my head collided with an old woman's, knocking us both unconscious." She turned around, her jaw muscles jumping in spasms, her eyes on fire. "I recovered from the concussion, but she didn't fare so well. Her speech was slurred for the rest of her days.

"But it only begins there," she said as her eyes glossed over with tears. "The torturous state you left papá in was a far worse punishment than death. His spirit died before he did, and I had to watch it all…"

Tien hadn't realized how hard he'd been gripping the sofa until his fingers punctured the material.

"And then I was the one who found him that morning, with his brains splattered against the wall like an abstract painting of war," she hissed, her voice rising in pitch. "And even in death, his empty eyes were anguished."

She began to pace, each of her words stabbing at him like a knife in the gut. "He was my idol, my life! And you took him away from me in the worst way possible!" she cried in a strangled tone meant to be a whisper, the tears spilling down her cheeks.

Tien's throat constricted, and he came to the morbid realization that her emotional sandblasting had ten times the effect of his earlier flashbacks. But the worst part was that he'd been happy a few minutes ago. Honestly, truly happy for the first time ever, having a sense of completeness and inner peace around Tinoco and Isabel.

And it was ebbing away in the face of reality. It had all been surreal. He had no right to be a part of their lives. None at all… He had been the cause of too much pain…

"I disowned the woman who gave birth to me," she continued, her wet eyes impaling him to the sofa. "Circumstance forced me into an early independence, and a couple years later, my life showed signs of becoming normal again. I fell in love with a good and honorable man whose family took me in unconditionally. We set a date to be married…"

Just when he thought he couldn't feel any worse, Tien's heart hit the floor. Kami… Don't tell me she'd been engaged when…

"And then a MONTH before the wedding, YOU show up on that unspeakable day and got me pregnant!" she hissed, her frame wracked with sobs. "So not only did I cheat on my fiancé - the only person to show me any affection since my world fell apart, but I did so with the man who paralyzed my father, handicapped an old woman, and burned down the tavern that belonged to my betrothed's family. Yeah, you bastard. It was THEIR tavern!"

Breathing became difficult, and Tien hung his head between his knees with his hands clasped behind his neck. Had it been any other person, he would have fled. But this… He'd merited this lectural tirade ten times over.

"And so I," she hiccupped and her next words were inarticulate, "I fled."

He knew how reclusive the Caídos were, and had never known one to leave the confines of their quaint villages until Isabel. It hurt him twice as much to consider how terrified she must have been, and the same sensation that formed a lump in his throat made its way to his tear ducts.

"But do you know what kept me going?" she was outright sobbing by now, and he didn't need special abilities to feel how tainted her soul was with angst. He felt it with heart-wrenching clarity. "The promise of revenge, Tenshinhan.

"So when time and distance made me lose momentum, I'd force myself to remember all the injustice you had caused, the havoc you wreaked on my life, and I'd do this over and over until the ire was just as white-hot as the day you first set foot in my town!

"Do you have any idea what it's like to hold a grudge for so long? My animosity for you poisoned my spirit, and poor Tinoco was raised in the shadow of it," she choked and took several seconds to regain enough composure to continue. He saw the little droplets of tears wet the carpet by her feet as he looked down in shame, regret, and an unprecedented guilt…

"And then you show up, and dangle the carrot of retribution in my face. But you'd changed," she gasped in between words. "Why…couldn't you have…stayed the same?

The words 'I'm sorry' hung on Tien's lips, unable to break free for the sheer inadequacy of their effect.

"And THEN you physically brought back a man who was still spiritually dead. You healed his body, but not his soul!" she cried. "When I finally found him, he was rocking back and forth staring at the home he once lived in as though chained to its memory for all of eternity."

"Isabel," he finally managed without looking up. "I didn't know-"

"All that made him happy was gone! Including me. Before I left, I took him to the home of the only people whom I knew would take him in. My fiancé's family, forcing me to face the disappointment and hurt I'd caused them all over again.

"And when I left without letting them know where I'd been, or where I was going, do you know what he said to me?" her voice cracked, and then next words came out in squeaks. "He said, 'You are dead to me, Isabel! You're…dead to…me!'"

The water in Tien's eyes spilled over and he clutched at his ears as though they were burning his skull.

He heard her slump on the floor before him, but he couldn't bring himself to look up. Crying was a sensation almost new to him, and he hid his tears from her as though they were hideous birthmarks on his face.

"So you want to make it up to me, Tenshinhan?" she wept, her voice drenched in emotional sarcasm. "You want to make it up to me? Then give me back all those years lost to hatred and bitterness! And then stay the hell out of my life!"


.

Isabel spat out her last remark with all the vehemence she could muster. He didn't respond, but she knew he heard her clearly, because he had flinched at every word she said. But his head was bowed, as though trying to dodge the full impact of her accusations. It only made her angrier.

"Look at me!" she hissed.

His head shook lightly, ragged, hissing breaths sounding from his hidden mouth.

"Look at me, Tenshinhan!" With what little ire she had left, she reached down and yanked his chin up until their eyes met.

The emotion in his face made her gasp.

The dim light caught on the wet teary sheen of his cheeks, and his teeth were clenched, as though in effort to force his tear ducts closed. Remorse, anguish, regret were all displayed in their purest form on his visage, and she suddenly remembered that he'd just parted with his best friend, and been rejected by the love of his life not two months ago… And here she was making him atone for sins he'd already offered up his life for.

Her breath caught in her throat. What have I done?

He collected his shuddering breath enough to squeeze a couple defeated words out. "I'll…leave…"

She held a hand up to his mouth as he tried to stand, and in an irrational act of crazed apology, she grabbed his face with both hands, and fell on his lips in a kiss.

Startled, he let out a small noise of surprise, and fell back, but her grip on his head was firm, and she pinned him against the pillows of the sofa, pouring her soul into it. His mouth was hesitant under her own, his hands gripping her sides as though unsure unsure whether or not to pull her to him or push her away.

But the tangy warmth of his kiss felt better than all her ranting and raving combined, and if it weren't for his obvious reluctance she might have made out with him for the rest of the night.

It was only when she felt the remainder of her animosity melt away, however, that she had the control to release him. Stunned at her own audacity, Isabel sat back and tried to catch her breath.

He gaped at her from his position on the sofa, his flushed, tear-streaked face a mix of residual anguish, passion and bewilderment all in one. "You're…confusing me," he breathed, his glossed eyes searching her face for some kind of enlightenment.

"I…" She broke away from his conflicted expression, and stood with her back to him. "I think I'm falling in love with you, Tenshinhan," she said quietly, the words stinging like a thousand betrayals in her heart. "And it's…wrong."

She went to leave the room, but stopped herself as she realized that one more thing needed to be said. "Forget tonight ever happened. It was a mistake," she said solemnly, recalling her angry words and the intimate kiss. "All of it."

Without waiting for him to respond, she walked down the hall and to her room, locking the door behind her.

She didn't hear the front door shut until twenty minutes later, but even then it took Isabel several more hours for sleep to finally claim her.

And it was a restless sleep, at that.