Title: Breaking Seamus
AU 6th year
Warnings:
One sided slash, angst, self hurt
Disclaimer: I do not own Seamus, just playing with an Irishman for a while, please don't sue!

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Chapter Nine: Perspectives

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Hey, sorry its been so long, everything got crazy with finals then winter break. But I'm back at school, and will work hard to update at least once a week! (hope I didn't lose too many readers!) Anyway, on to Chapter Nine. You may want to re-read the last chapter or so to refresh your memory. Thanks for reading!

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Today was potions class, and Seamus really was not looking forward to it. He just knew that there was going to be a confrontation between his dorm mates and Malfoy. And it wouldn't be pretty.

Seamus was just so tired. Tired of hearing all the nasty things people were saying about Malfoy and homosexuals in general. Tired of chasing after and annoying Lavender. Tired of avoiding Dean. Seamus was tired of his whole damn life.

It felt like he hadn't had a good night's sleep in ages, and it was beginning to show on his face. He looked and felt like utter crap.

So it was with heavy steps that Seamus followed his classmates into the Potions dungeon. He had just barely gotten to his customary seat next to Dean, when Snape swept into the room shutting the door behind him.

Snape strode to the front of the room and pointed his wand at the chalkboard. Familiar scrawled handwriting filled with potions instructions appeared.

"We will be brewing Animortiacus today, who can tell me what it does." Snape asked sharply.

Predictably, Hermione raised her hand, but Seamus was surprised to see Malfoy's hand go up as well. Seamus looked intently at Malfoy. He seemed calm and rested.

"Actually, I'm going by Black now." Malfoy said abruptly.

Seamus almost laughed when this caused Harry to somehow trip over nothing and fall to the ground, yelping "What!?!" quite loudly.

"Oh right Potter forgot your dog father was my mum's cousin." Malfoy laughed flippantly.

"You can't use that name!" Harry yelled seething mad. Which was a rather scary look, Seamus personally thought. But Malfoy didn't seem affected by Harry's countenance.

"And why the hell not? It's my mum's maiden name, I'm half Black. Mind your own business you clot." Malfoy said.

Seamus looked over at Ron who seemed to be turning remarkably red. "Shut your mouth you evil pissy little qu…" Hermione hit Ron cutting him off.

Malfoy laughed at him, "That's right Weasley, listen to your ball and chain maybe some day she'll give you your cods back."

Ron's ears were now flaming red, a sure sign that this was about to get ugly. Seamus slid further down in his seat as Ron retorted, "So how does it feel to be penniless? It's nice when people get what they deserve."

"Well, Weasley I may not be rich anymore, but at least I'm still pretty. Which is more than I can say for you." Malfoy countered flippantly.

"Chutney ferret." Dean muttered loudly next to him. Seamus once again felt like someone had punched him in the gut. Dean rarely ever spoke up during arguments between Harry and Malfoy. For him to speak up now… it meant he really felt strongly about it. Clenching his jaw, Seamus tried his hardest to not look like anything was wrong. He wanted more than anything to run and hide and perhaps never see anyone ever again.

Absorbed in his thoughts, Seamus missed what was being said until Ron yelled something about Malfoy being a death eater. He watched as the Slytherin's face contorted into a familiar mocking sneer.

"Oh yes Weasley, I really fancy killing and torturing people just so snake face can get his jollies off. Besides those huge black robes really make my arse look fabulous."

"Your full of it Malfoy." Harry said emphasizing Malfoy. To which the other boy looking endlessly aggrieved rolled his eyes and said, "Are you daft? What part about disowned didn't you hear? I. Am. NOT. A. Malfoy. Which also means I don't have to be a death eater. I've finally got a damn choice."

"And I'm supposed to believe you suddenly are going to be on the good side after six years of being an evil little shit?" Harry asked doubtfully.

"Suddenly? Well a few days ago, not being one wasn't an option. Now I can do what ever the bloody hell I want. And I don't know what I want, but I can tell you something, I don't want to be a damn death eater." Malfoy said scowling at Harry.

Seamus was surprised at this, but Harry looked like he was about to hit the other boy in the nose. Malfoy however, got this really creepy calm look on his face.

He watched as Malfoy..er Black spun on his heel and faced the room. "Has anyone here ever seen the dark lord? Well, its not a pretty sight. He's not even human anymore, has this weird slit in his face for a nose, white leathery skin, and RED EYES. Red eyes people. Red Fucking Eyes. Oy Potter you know what I'm talking about." He continued smiling a bit addressing the class, " And he curses his own followers treats them like muggles, and trust me I've felt the Cruciatus at dear daddy's hands enough for one life time thank you very much. I don't really fancy being a…"

"ENOUGH!" Snape bellowed.

"Thirty points from Gryffindor, And Mr. Mal… Black. See me after class. Now, everyone get back to work, next person to speak gets a week of detention." Snape seethed.

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The rest of the class proceeded in an anxious silence. Seamus couldn't seem to concentrate on his work at all. His hands shook, but if Dean noticed he didn't say anything. In the end, their potion was a sort of yellow lumpy paste. It was supposed to be light blue and gelatinous.

Seamus sighed, brought a sample to Snape's desk, and hurriedly cleaned up his work table. He was in no mood to stick around and talk to Dean or anyone else. Not meeting his friend's eye, the Irishman side stepped out of the room and made a dash for the library.

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As soon as he room was empty. Draco stuffed the parchment he had been doodling on into his bag, and approached Snape's desk. As he walked to the front of the room, he slide his wand into his hand, not caring that this was entirely visible to his professor. The calm smile had left Draco's face, and he now looked wary and on his guard.

The head of Slytherin just appeared weary. But Draco wasn't about to trust his once favorite professor. He was well aware that Snape was a death eater.

Snape looked up at the former Malfoy heir, in a resigned sort of way. Seeing the wand in his hand he thought (at least the boy has some sense).

"You may put your wand away Mr. Black, If I was going to curse you it would not be at a time when everyone knows you are with me."

Draco seemed assured by this Slytherin reasoning, but made no move to tuck his wand away. "I'd rather not, just the same."

Snape gave a small nod at this, but Draco continued "Have you been sent orders to dispose of me or send me to Lucius yet?"

The forthrightness of this startled Severus, but he did not show it. "Lucius has no legal right to force you to leave the school, he gave up all parental rights when he disowned you."

Draco narrowed his eyes, "Like that matters. I know what kind of man he is. And I know what kinds of alliances you have as well. You know I am not thick, so please refrain from treating me as such." He said forcefully.

Severus replied, "Not thick? Could have surprised me with that rash outburst in my classroom today. What, pray tell, were you thinking? I will not have an interruption like that again. I expected as much from Potter, but not you. You have detention this evening at eight, bring materials to write an essay on today's potion."

Draco seemed surprised and suspicious of the uncomplicated task. Snape rolled his eyes, "So long as you behave, I am not going to suddenly start treating you differently Draco."

The use of his first name did not, as it once had, ease his mind. "I don't trust you. I'm not a fool, you can't get to me this way. I'd rather you did treat me harshly." Draco stated.

The head of Slytherin, had a blinding migraine. The boy now thought he was playing mind games in order to get close enough to send him to his father or kill him outright. Getting Slytherins to trust someone they had reason to distrust was like flying a broom through a wall. He'd have to give something away. It could put his spying and life in jeopardy, but Draco… it was worth it. Draco had the potential to be a powerful wizard, he was extremely intelligent, and now that the boy was no longer under Lucius' thumb he could make a potent ally for the light. He might be able to stop others from joining the dark lord as well, Gregory Goyle certainly. It would be worth it just to save a few of his Slytherins from the same dark path he himself had gone down when he was their age.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he replied, "Believe what you will, I am not attempting to lull you into a false sense of security. I understand that you can't trust me. In any case, go talk to Dumbledore about your future."

Draco seemed startled by this, but Severus raised up his hand and continued, "He can and will assist you. I'm not saying you have to fight against the dark lord. He will protect you regardless. And not just you, take Mr. Goyle along. I know the headmaster seems out of his head, but the old man is vastly more than he appears to be. You may go to lunch now."

The flaxen haired Slytherin didn't say a word, but as he turned to leave, he heard Snape say, "Just go to him, Draco."

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Meanwhile, Seamus had once again skipped lunch in favor of the library. He hunched over an essay that wasn't due for weeks, working manically on it in order to distract himself. It wasn't really working.

The sneer on Dean's face remained etched in his head.

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Author's note: Sorry for the repetitiveness of some of the chapter… just thought it would be a good refresher, and a way to show Seamus' perspective of the potions' incident.

Please Review! Offers up Seamus shaped candy