– – –

Author's Note:

Invader Zim is -c- Jhonen Vasquez! Only the events of this story, characters specific to the story, and character tweaking (heh) are mine. :3

~Jizena~

– – –

Dib's Records

The state of having been knocked unconscious is an interesting one. It was one that I'd thought about plenty of times before, as a kid. Oh, I studied all kinds of anomalies of consciousness… somnambulism, dreams, alternate dimensions in my own head (don't get me started), comas, unconsciousness, death itself and reanimated bodies. I thought about that kind of thing all the time. I'd get distracted by ghost hunts, aliens, conspiracies, more aliens, my sister duct-taping my mouth shut… but nearly every night before I fell asleep, I'd wonder if I'd dream. And what about.

That was usually the one time of day I'd ever think about my mom, back then. I'd wonder if the way I was living my life would have been something she'd like, or something she'd shoot down like Dad had started to. But then I'd just slip into a dream that reflected my day, or I'd have a regular little-kid nightmare, or I'd just have my brain shut off till morning.

I'd always figured it was that shutting off that happened in true unconsciousness. It had taken watching my godfather fall into a coma for me to wish dreams upon that state instead.

I didn't dream, after the blow to my head in the bowels of the central city of Devastis. I perceived. I saw.

Through a kind of Meekrob third eye, in particular. As soon as I tapped into the universe, the way Nacea had taught me, the way I'd tried to show to Victor before he went under, I knew that something had gone wrong… but that it was something I could fix. I saw color, I saw light, I heard an eerie kind of sound that created a sort of music from everything around me. I felt pressure on my body but a lightness in my mind.

I heard voices, too. Random, whispered knowledge, from everywhere. The data the Meekrob had been collecting for centuries.

Within consciousness lies the self. Comprising the self are a great many factors. We are made of memories, which are tools that we can use to better ourselves, to seek further knowledge, to become closer to that humming, bright universe. Or, we can shut everything out. There are those who see light when they close their eyes and dream, and there are those that consciously choose to see nothing at all.

I wondered about Irken consciousness. About whether or not they even had a chance to witness the knowledge of the universe, as the Meekrob did, or as dreaming humans could, or if that was something that had been taken away by Control Brain supremacy. To have only one form of consciousness… it must have taken an awful toll on one's motivations. There would be a visible representation of everything.

Relying so much on PAKs must have been so confusing. Or perhaps not, if that was all the Irkens knew.

I wondered how Ira had seen it. Wondered how, alternately, Red had begun to feel about human consciousness. Zim had certainly embraced it, for it was the complete opposite of all he'd ever known.

I wondered if I'd ever get to speak to Nacea again, if my unconsciousness could ever take me that far…

Chairman Xeer had told me that the Meekrob would aid us in our greatest time of need. This may not have been that time, but I had to believe that they saw me. That they knew that things were growing dire, and that it was highly probable that we would be in need of their wisdom, guidance and assistance soon.

And since they were not fighters, I knew exactly why they had not come, as soon as I opened my eyes.

It was interesting… coming out of unconsciousness, I was not groggy or disoriented at all. My eyes simply snapped open as if I'd enjoyed a good night's rest. It was waking up that was the nightmare. That was what I thought at first, anyway.

The first thing that I was able to register was that my arms were tied tightly behind my back… to another set of arms, at that; leaner, thinner—Gaz…?

"Gaz?" I asked in a whisper, nudging my elbows back somewhat.

"Mmph," she responded, sounding worse for the wear than I felt. She'd never seen the universe, she'd never studied with the Meekrob. I did hope that someday they could teach her more.

We were tied up back to back, sitting in the middle of a pale red floor, of a domed, reddish-grey room with low ceilings and, as far as I could see from where I stood, two ways out. There were no windows. Ducts and wires hung down from the ceiling, indicating the place's misuse over what must have been a dreadfully long period of time.

"What's going on? You okay?" I asked my sister.

She choked, and pressed up against me. When her shoulders touched mine, I felt a twinge in my back. As if the Irken parasite inside me had felt some need to react. "I'm trying to be," Gaz told me honestly. "Dib, something's really wrong…"

"Are you hurt?" I had to know, craning my neck around to try to look at her.

But as soon as I let my field of vision shift, I knew that I hardly needed her to answer. Between the room's two exits, my eyes finally registered, was a circular stage, which looked like it once had held a large computer. Steps led up to a small pedestal, behind which were neglected wires for the long since removed device.

Currently, however, it was being used as something of a chair. Sitting comfortably atop the pedestal was someone that I recognized only slightly. His hollow eyes were red, rather than brown; he held at the ready the enormous sword known as Osdraken. On his forehead, the red Irken Elite symbol.

I choked on my breath, and grabbed hold of my sister's hand. Just to reassure her that I was there, and would not let anything happen to her.

Not at the hands of the Elite Commander.

Sitting a couple steps down from the high pedestal was GIR, eyes red, awaiting orders. Something was different about the little robot's chassis… his right arm looked exactly like MiMi's…

What the hell?

No way had Zim lost to his past. No fucking way. No. Something was off, something was wrong—he was better than that, stronger than that; the Commander was a thing of the past. I'd put a lot of faith in Zim to succeed. Gaz had, even moreso.

To the Commander's left, hovering slightly over the ground, was my mother's Mirror. Its glass was currently black, empty. I knew very well what kinds of things that Mirror could do. Just what was he doing with it…? How and why was it here?

Why the fuck had Zim lost…?

No—I told myself. Not lost. He hadn't, he couldn't have. Otherwise, that body would not have been human.

The Commander grinned when he saw that I'd become aware of his presence, and stood. He took his time descending the few stairs until his thick boots clacked out their heavy steps on the reddish floor. "Well, well, well," he said, taking his time to milk each syllable, lowering his inflection with each repetition of the word. "Looks like we can finally get started."

I glared up at him, discovering as I did that a corner of the right lens of my glasses had been chipped. That fuck. It wasn't enough to be much of a distraction, but it was still something that would bother me a little. It more or less summed up how I felt, too: I wasn't completely angry. There was just a crack in my nerves.

Because I do not put faith in just anyone. I raised myself, thank you. I trusted people as they proved themselves to me. I had been collecting family around me, and loving the fact that, for once in my life, I had a community. Few people had ever really believed in or trusted me, until recently. Gaz had always been there, Dad was there now; I'd fallen in love with Lex and adored her enthusiasm for her work, and Zim—fuck, he was part of the family, too. I'd been repeating these things to myself like a mantra.

I was not angry at him for having lost, no. The situation was what bothered me. The fact that maybe I had had a lapse of judgment annoyed me. But as far as Zim went: all I could think of was the fact that if he'd lost his fight, I'd lost a friend. And I hate losing people.

"How the hell did you get out?" I demanded, cutting out any other unpleasantries that could serve as a greeting to the current situation.

"Impatient, aren't we?" the Commander taunted me right back. "I won. That is all you need to know."

"Why?" I spat.

The Commander scowled, and crouched to my level, brandishing the dagger charm on his right wrist. "Because I always win in the end," he said in a dark tone. "I always get what I want."

"Only because you just fucking take it," Gaz snarled.

When she spoke, I noticed that GIR moved slightly, to stand at attention and take action, should he be needed. The Commander gave me a final glance over, then stood and worked his way around, to stand over Gaz. "Exactly," he said to her, his voice low and cold. "That is the only way to guarantee success, you see. That is how I became the Elite Commander. And that is why I am in command once again."

A thought hit me. A thought, stemming from a memory that was stuck, tugging at my mind.

I hadn't really fought against Zim in a long, long time. He never really could accept defeat, could he? Every defeat, he dismissed as a mistake, or sometimes a new challenge, sometimes even a victory.

Hoping he wouldn't notice, I tugged a little at the bond that tied me to my sister. Yeah, it was pretty strong, and—wait a second… I looked around, and discovered my sword, and Gaz's daggers, lying in plain view on the far wall. So he was planning on us breaking free. He was planning on us making a run for our weapons, and fighting him.

He enjoyed the struggle. Just so he could gloat.

So how could I fight him without stepping into that trap…?

I felt for the watch on my wrist, and tried not to sigh with relief when I found it. From the look of it, we were the only ones the Commander had taken into that room. I refused to believe that he'd taken Red out after me; Tenn's group should still be safe; Skutch was hopefully all right… we still had the rest of the army. Did he know that? Or was leaving me my only method of communication purposeful? I didn't want to underestimate him, but, then again, if this guy minus his memories had created the nonsensical, erratic yet still destructive Invader Zim, then…

Fuck it. It was worth a shot.

Worth more than feeding the Fear he so prided himself in being.

If there was one thing Zim could never fight against me with, it was the simple use of words. Logic. Yes, he might get pretty fucking angry, but I had to start tripping a nerve somewhere.

"The only way to get ahead, little Gaz, is for me to take what I need," the Commander went on. "I want something to burn, I burn it. I want the resources a planet can provide? I take them. The universe belongs to the Empire, and I will not have you two disgusting anomalies getting in my way."

No, I thought. The universe belongs to anyone with a conscience. To those who take the time to learn. Not just take and destroy.

"What're you going to do with us?"

"Kill you," he said, without hesitating. "Eventually. There's just one thing I need first… to make this spectacle exactly what I need it to be."

"You have absolutely no feelings," Gaz mumbled.

"That's right, princess," the Commander grinned.

I craned my neck to look at my sister. I had to get her understanding my method. Push the nerve. However I had to go about doing so. "Well," I snorted. "That must suck." …I could have done better. But it was a start.

GIR narrowed his eyes and shot two laser beams out at me from an ocular source. I leaned forward, dragging Gaz—who screamed a little at the sudden movement—with me. We rolled out of the way, a few feet closer to our weapons, and the second I felt myself getting dizzy, I made us stop and got us sitting up again. I apologized to my sister, then glared up at the Commander, whose stern gaze was focused in turn on me.

Keep going till you hit a nerve, Dib, I had to tell myself. That was the only way I was going to puncture this guy.

"A one-track mind is disgusting," I continued. "There's no way you can feel nothing."

"Oh," said the Commander, leering, "that's where you're wrong. I have no heart." The scar across his chest proved it.

But hadn't Zim?

There had to be something…

I tried hard to keep myself focused; to not even blink. "So?"

"Dib, what are you doing?" Gaz hiss-whispered back at me. I shushed her, as the Commander approached, relishing each of his own steps.

"The source of that treacherous emotion," our current opponent began, "is not one that I need concern myself with."

"What?!" I snapped. "That's so fucking presumptuous of you!"

"Dib, stop!" Gaz pleaded. "What're you doing? He's—"

"He's fucking disgusting," I said. The Commander took to that, and tilted his head back to begin laughing. "No!" I shouted. "No, I'm not done with you!" He sneered down at me, looking more than ready to enjoy another laugh at my expense. "You arrogant prick, the heart pumps blood!" I yelled up at him. "That's what it does. That's just plain old science. All you did was cut out one source of energy, to rely on your PAK instead!"

No wonder he looked so tired.

The years he had truly served as Elite Commander, I now realized, made up so little of Zim's full life. But the grudges had lived. The distaste for what he could not understand had persisted. That part of him had not slept, not once, not ever. It must have been exhausting, making his PAK work double, triple to keep up his energy… and all for nothing, really. Yes, he was a heartless bastard.

But cut out an organ, and that was it: all he'd done was cut out an organ. He'd never cut out his ability to feel. That was a part of him, one that he had to become human to fully understand, but one that had been with him all his life.

He'd worn himself out by ignoring it.

Oh, there it was. That was our edge. I could only hope that Gaz could see past her own fears in order to play a part in getting us freed and turning this whole ordeal around.

"And what's wrong with that?" the Commander glowered at me. "Originals are a dying breed, and—"

"And you refuse to be a part of that," I finished for him. "Am I right?!"

"You would do best to not interrupt me," my opponent snapped. "You are only furthering your demise."

"I thought you needed one more thing," I said, "before you could kill us."

"Ideally. But death is death," he grinned, drumming his fingers against his sword. "How it meets you and when are factors that matter very little to me."

There he went again… turning a possible wrong turn into a chance for victory…

"You've… kinda regressed," I pointed out, knowing full well that the Commander probably wanted nothing more than to strike me down for that.

He scowled. "Mind your words, you insignificant—"

Shit… I would have laughed if I hadn't been so afraid that a quick death was waiting for me if I did. I was reading more into this past version of Zim by the second. Fear is interesting. It manifests itself so clearly. One man's fear could look like nothing but a simple person or an object to another. The thing about the Commander, the thing that he prided himself in, was that he looked threatening. He had it all, every means necessary to be the most powerful killer in the Irken military. To be the one person above all others to instill fear in the enemy.

He had it all going for him. He was tall. Visibly physically strong. His scars showed his passion for battle, his face showed an unbreakable emotionless coldness. He made good on his threats.

Yes. He had power. He was talented as a soldier. He could probably cut my fucking throat out if he could hear my thoughts (and thank God he couldn't, because I'd've been dead in seconds). He wielded not just a fearsome weapon but one of the Irken Talismans.

But for someone so sure of his own methods… why had he never broken Osdraken himself? Why not do away with the greatest opponent to the Irken race? All that conquest, all that war…

And he had not turned against his own government. The thing that was controlling him. The thing that his PAK answered to even if his neglected Originality did not. No, he'd just wanted to be the best within the Empire that already existed. So that he could claim something. Take away the Brains and there was no Empire, not the way he'd known it. He could speak out against whatever he wanted, but he was just as much a mindless drone as any of the others. Worse, even.

He just didn't want to hear about it.

And he'd always been that way.

He had always, always, always, as long as I had known him, tried to be the best at what he could be. His perception of what was the best. He chose what was true and what was false. He chose what was strong and what wasn't. He chose what was useful and what wasn't.

That was just the way Zim operated.

And fuck if I didn't have notebooks upon notebooks from elementary school about it.

To conquer Earth, Invader Zim had come to my hometown. Which, I mean, come on, wasn't exactly Washington, DC. He'd've done better somewhere other than a city that wasn't even a state capitol. But there he was. Making the best of what he had. Trying to take out Earth from his base in my town. When I got in his way, conquest then had to take a back seat to wiping out the opposition.

So it was, so it continued to be—he may have wiped his memories of having been the Elite Commander, he may have become much more subtle (and, okay, much more stupid) in his tactics, but the drive… the drive was there. The want to prove himself. Flaunting his exploits. Taunting me because he knew he could, because he believed that Irkens were superior and humans were stupid. And that he was superior to the others of his class.

That jerk finally started to come around thanks to Tak turning him human. To him discovering emotions. To Gaz helping him figure them out. I'd gladly started thinking of him as a friend once he put that stubborn drive to better himself to good use. Rather than flaunt power and take lives, Zim had begun to trust, learned how to accept that some deeds were better suited to others, and he could put his own strengths to use on different tasks. He'd opened himself up. He had developed a respect for life.

Originality was an interesting concept to me. By all accounts, the Irkens with the Original gene would have been more likely to understand humans. Skutch and Tenn seemed to, sure. Red did. He'd even admitted it. Even Tak did. Tak especially, when I thought about it. She understood the bridge between our races, and sought to tie them—albeit for her own selfish purposes, but still.

The Commander, however… the Commander drowned all that out. Because I was pretty sure that Miyuki had been the closest thing he'd ever had to an actual conscience. He listened to her. Trusted her, even. But without her, he had nothing. So he shut everything out.

Irkens see everything in the shade of the color of their eyes.

Humans, for the most part, don't. We can see an unfathomable assortment of colors.

Irkens repress their 'unnecessary emotions.'

Humans don't. Oh, we can bitch about them all we want, but at the end of the day, we'd be nothing if we couldn't express ourselves the way we wanted to. We could spill our thoughts for hours or we could keep things in. Some of us act out, some of us don't.

Irkens do not address fear; humans can understand and learn from it.

The machines made the Irkens monochromatic, whereas humans… we had the spectrum.

Zim had started to understand that.

I knew exactly what it was he was really afraid of.

You can blame my exhaustive notes for that. I know Gaz does.

"Hey," I said, cutting the Commander off mid-sentence.

"I told you not to interrupt me!" he hollered. "You are nothing but a thorn in my side, a threat to my—"

"Mission?"

Lightning fast, the Commander held out the sharpened end of his dagger charm and struck me across the face. Gaz screamed, which was the first thing that I registered. Not the sting from the cut, not the hot, thick blood that gathered at the wound. My sister's scream.

She was completely shutting down, and I could not stand seeing that.

All right… now I was angry. Lost in his own mind or not, Zim had no place treating her like this. No place taunting her, hurting her—not when I knew he actually could do better. "What is it?" I demanded through clenched teeth, glaring up at my opponent.

"What's that, human?"

"Tell me, as long as you're milking it! What's the other thing you need?!" I shouted. "What is it you want? You're taking what you want? Okay! Tell me what the hell that is!"

The Commander studied the two of us. His eyes unblinking, he looked me up and down first, and then Gaz. Like a scientist looking for an answer in a new specimen, his eyes soaked in every detail. From the looks of it, he was not pleased with what he saw. Sunken, his eyes showed nothing but a terrible hatred. "I should not need to explain why I despise you," he said dourly. "This Prophecy of the Brains… hmf. Heirs? Don't make me laugh. Heirs so unworthy of the Empire left behind by the only Tallest worth following…"

"So you hate us because we're…?" I prompted him.

"Human. And yet you are hers."

Furious, the Commander turned away from us. GIR watched his every move. While he had his back turned, I nudged Gaz, and whispered, "It's gonna be all right. Follow my lead."

"What're we doing?" she wondered.

"Might get messy, but we've gotta outsmart him."

Gaz nodded. "I was… kinda thinking the same thing," she said. "When I can think. Ugh. If we can just… Zim's gotta still be in there. He's just… he's just got to wake up…"

"So let's be the alarm," I decided. "You gonna be okay?" My sister nodded again. "Okay." I took in a deep breath, reading the static in the air, and began to will energy into the palms of my hands. "Let's break out of this."

"How—oh…"

Gaz caught on fast, and helped my realization by gathering energy of her own. Neither of us really had a way of cutting out of the bonds, but it wasn't metal holding us together. We could burn it off. If we planned well enough, and took things easily. No blasting, just easy, easy…

As we worked, the Commander strode over toward the Mirror, and circled it once. He studied its ornate frame, then set a hand on the edge, running his fingers over the odd yet curiously alluring carved design. "Better be watching for the finale, human," I heard him mutter. "She'll be last, you know."

"What was that?" I called over.

"We're nearing the end," he said, not turning away quite yet. "Or, at least, you are soon to meet yours. The others are sure to notice your absence soon."

"Oh, so who's it you're after?" I felt the rope begin to give. Any second now… "Red?"

"Red became incompetent," the Commander said disapprovingly. He began to walk back toward us just as the rope frayed and gave enough for Gaz and I to shake it off. Thinking fast, though, we pressed up closer together, back to back. "Red is not important to me."

"Is anyone?" Gaz mumbled over at him. With our backs to the wall, Gaz and I both made a reach for our weapons. After stretching my fingers out a few times, I managed to grab hold of the hilt of my Tavic sword. The trick was not to let it so much as scrape across the floor until we were ready… "Other than yourself, you monster," she added on an even lower tone.

The Commander heard her, and sneered. "Do you want to know why Miyuki was worthy of her position?" he said, taking a slow step toward us. "Do you want to know why she had power above all others? Why she was chosen to hold an Irken Talisman? Because she had vision. Miyuki's hands created weapons, and those weapons created the Empire. Her weapons made soldiers out of simple Irkens, and one of those chosen few happened to be me.

"And for me—ah!—for me, she crafted this." He held out Osdraken, stroking its blade with the fingers of his left hand. It shone cold off of the eerie, seemingly sourceless light of the room, casting nightmares along the floor. "The Elite Blade. Strength attracts strength, you see, and thus my blade became a Talisman as well. We communicated, she and I. With her Mirror as a portal and my blade as executioner, I could take out a planet in an instant before the alarm could be raised."

"So what does this have to do with you wanting to kill us?" Gaz challenged him.

"You exist."

"You can do better than that," I complained.

The Commander cracked his neck to one side, then the other, and GIR copied his motion from where he stood. Our opponent basked in the grim light for a moment, then drew in a long breath, and scowled down at us, still not seeming to have noticed that we had made the silent grab for our weapons. "That I can," he said to me. "Your existence, you see, is a great threat to the Empire that I carved out for Tallest Miyuki."

He paused, as if to test us, wondering if that explanation was sufficient. It certainly wasn't, though I was pretty sure I knew where he was going with his semi-anecdote. If I was right, we would definitely have an edge, because I'd be able to shoot him down with the very thing he was trying to avoid. Assuming we timed things right, anyway.

One more thing he needed, huh? Before killing us?

The difference between the Commander and the Invader was the ability to use force. To make good on threats. I probably couldn't out-talk the Commander the way I'd been able to outsmart Zim back in elementary school, but the tactics could at least help a little. If the Commander said he'd kill us, he was definitely getting around to that. But he was stalling. One more thing…?

Please tell me it's what I think it is… I felt myself start musing, as disturbing and disgusting an idea as it was…

If I was right though… yeah, we'd have a chance in this…

First thing was first, though. Keep him talking. And the best way to do that was throw every curve ball I could. "You know, maybe some things never change, but you did," I said. "You started to, anyway. You still can."

"Pray tell, human," he scowled at me, "why would I want to?"

"So you can stop hiding behind your delusions."

"Emotions are delusions!" the Commander snapped. I had his attention! Good. He took the opportunity to lunge forward. He raised his broadsword over his head, and shouted out, "All that matters is—"

Gaz cried out, and rushed out of the way, clambering to her feet upon taking up her daggers. I, too, darted out of Osdraken's path, then took my opening to stand and strike back against the Commander. My sword clashed against his, managing with the arc of its path to shove him aside. The Commander growled and righted himself, then punched me across the face, in the same place where he'd cut me earlier. I cried out from the sting of it, and felt the wound open somewhat. Not letting that stop me, however, I feinted back away from the Commander, and held my sword at the ready.

"What, yourself?!" I shouted, to complete my opponent's predictable thought. "Your position, your conquests, the Empire? That's not a reason, Commander, that's an excuse!"

"Excuse?" he mocked me. "It is drive."

"Misguided, maybe, but it's not what you really want at all, is it?" I smirked. "You lost your real drive when you lost—" Take the fucking bait, asshole…

Gaz caught on right away. "Oh, my God!" she exclaimed, with a slight gasp. I grinned. We were on the same page.

He'd said it himself: he had carved out the Empire for her.

When you lost Miyuki.

I let the Commander finish the sentence in his own head. And, oh, he did, and oh, was he pissed. "I lost nothing," he growled at me, bringing his sword down on me again. I blocked, but the force of his blow got me to my knees. His eyes burned, bloodshot, and he kicked me down onto my back. Before he could bring his heel down onto my head, I rolled out of the way, and stood back. He lashed out again immediately, adding onto his thought, "She was taken from me."

"She!" I laughed, proud to have been right on what my edge against that guy could be. "Do tell, Zim!"

"COMMANDER," he insisted. "Nobody calls me by that name but—" He cut himself off with an incensed growl, then struck out again. He managed to nick my left shoulder with the very tip of his blade; it felt like ice against my skin, but I got off with little more than a scratch and a couple wrecked garments when I feinted back.

"So you're gonna kill us? This is how you're getting back at… what, her?" I spat at him, trying not to show just how proud of myself I was for hitting him right where it could really start to hurt. The more I kept up this kind of verbal fighting… jostling, really… the better a chance I figured Zim would have of hearing me. And maybe not me, but Gaz, once she found her own words.

We could still do this. We could get him back.

"Fate?" I continued. "What? What are you so afraid of?"

"I fear nothing. I instill it."

"Why?" Gaz asked.

He reeled, turning on her, eyes on fire.

"What's the one thing you need before you kill us, Commander?" Gaz scowled at him. "Is it something, or someone?"

Furious, the Commander grabbed my sister and shoved her against the wall. I shouted out her name, and instantly had to dodge another GIR laser blast that would have severed my foot from my ankle had I not managed to get out of the way in time.

"I don't think I need to make myself any clearer, princess!" the Commander hollered into Gaz's face, while he had her pinned. "While the two of you live, you are a threat to me. While it is thrilling to have opposition, I do need to dispose of you. You, and your thieving human father."

"I KNEW IT!" I cried out.

Irkens sure do hold grudges. I knew it, I knew it, I fucking knew it…

The Commander had not slept for years… he had not fully been laid to rest, and watched from microchips in Zim's PAK as the world changed around him, while he stayed the same. He took in new knowledge, but in a frozen mindset. This much I knew was true: he had been in love with Tallest Miyuki.

I knew he had been. The way he talked around it proved it to me even more. He had failed in saving her from the 'death' he was then blamed for, and decades later, he was to learn that not only had she moved on, she'd had children.

Zim could still wake up. The Commander was a terrifying entity, for the sheer fact that, yes, he got nearly everything he wanted, through acts of senseless violence. But deep, deep inside him, one thing remained the same.

Losing someone you love is a lot harder to deal with when you couldn't accept that you ever loved them in the first place. And without a grasp of a full set of emotions… yes. I could kind of see how someone would go insane. Not that I'd condone it whatsoever—hell, if Zim couldn't wake up, I… well, I really didn't want to think about what measures I'd have to take in that case.

So for now, what Gaz and I both had to do was just trust… and hold on.

"Our dad?" I mocked the Commander. "You're using us to get at our dad?!"

Admittedly, Red had wanted to do the same thing. He'd made a wrong turn and taken Ira instead. If that was the case, the Brains must have had it out for him, for 'taking' Miyuki…

"You've a very simple mind," the Commander bit at me. "No. You will die first. I want to enjoy every moment of destroying him. You will die, and then that wretched man. And then," said the Commander, turning back to Gaz, "you. You are going to die last." He leaned in close and rasped out, "You will die slowly. Over a period of years if need be. You will witness the deaths of your father and brother, and then I shall relish in destroying you. Beat by beat of your disgusting human heart… you, Miyuki's daughter, are an unworthy object of affection for my human half to have chosen; beat by beat, you'll feel yourself die for that. If you were not an Heir, you would be nothing. I think nothing of you. He never should have entangled himself with you.

"While he lives inside me, he will watch you suffer."

"Zim's alive?" Gaz whispered, eyes wide.

"Not for long."

I had half a mind to drive my sword through his gut at that point, but I remembered just in time that we did kinda need Zim to stay alive. I had to wait for a better kind of opening.

Gaz found it first. "I get it. You're jealous," Gaz said, her voice cracking somewhat. She was afraid to speak, I could tell, but her words needed to be heard.

"Shut up! Petty jealousy has nothing to do with—"

"You're jealous," she repeated. Gaz gathered her breath, and I saw the gears in her head turning as she continued to speak. "Maybe you're strong, maybe you're powerful, maybe you talk big, but your grudge died a long time ago, didn't it?" The Commander said nothing, but looked ready to kill. "Did you love the power my mom had, or did you love her for who she was, and then just followed her from there?! You loved her. Right? And she rejected you? She chose my dad over you, and you're too fucking absorbed with yourself to admit that you LOST SOMETHING!" Her voice sounded raw; tears clung to her eyes. But God, was I ever proud of my sister.

"DO NOT SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY!" the Commander roared.

He struck her across the face, causing her to scream.

I darted forward, and grabbed the Commander off of her, forcing him off to the side. I noticed, when I did so, how awful the scars on his back looked. Decaying skin surrounded the crossed scars, turning the area brittle, putrid. I tapped into the air, and gathered an orb of energy in my left hand, which I then hurled at his back, causing him to let out something that could have been construed as a cry of alarm.

"Gerohnod!" he ordered.

"Ger-what?" I had to ask.

"Oh, shit," Gaz said. "Dib, move!"

In a split second, GIR's image shifted as MiMi's could—in the robot's place stood a figure with cyborgean human qualities, arms enhanced with robotic parts that seemed to have the ability to take out opponents in an instant. When I got over the sudden marvel of the situation, I yelped and put a barrier around myself just in time to block a blast he sent my way from a glowing pad on his left palm. "FUCK!" I cried out. "How long's he been able to do that?!"

"Long enough to screw us over," Gaz remarked.

"Well, shit."

I kept my barrier up, and GIR—well, Gerohnod—sent two more blasts at me. Furious to not have broken past me, he held out his enhanced right arm. The wires surrounding his forearm began to snake around what appeared to be skin, and the orb at the center of his palm glowed. Shit… he was charging a cannon…

I took in a deep breath.

"I am not the sort of person to be weakened by simple jealousy," the Commander scolded my sister. "I built my life from nothing, you understand me?! I cut out what I did not need. I killed my own Commander to get ahead."

"Why?" Gaz demanded.

"To serve the strongest Empire—"

"The Empire?" my sister quizzed him. "Or Miyuki?"

"The two were synonymous! You are beginning to try my nerves, little girl!"

"Because you know I'm right!"

The cannon completely charged, Gerohnod fired. Having been distracted, I took the full force of the blast. I lost my footing, my breath and my weapon in a second, and when I managed to gasp in a breath, I discovered that I'd landed on my back in the center of the room. Forcing myself up, I scrambled out of the way just as the Commander's sentient weapon was rushing at me again. He threw a punch, and I ducked. I gulped in another breath, then shoved my elbow back into his ribs and searched the floor for my sword.

"Looking for this?" Gerohnod said.

I looked up; he'd just scooped the weapon up from the ground, and took a swipe at me. Thinking fast, I clenched my hands together and thrust them upward at his elbow. I heard a crack, and he let go of my sword. "Thanks for that," I panted, gathering the rest of my breath. The blade clattered to the ground near Gerohnod's heel, and I managed to snatch it up while he was repairing his arm.

I spun, then, to check on my sister, still locked in a battle of wits against the personification of the grudge the Commander had been developing over years and years. That man was Fear… he was an image of death, gladly playing the part of the reaper, choosing who he deemed worthy of living and dying. He had held a high position, striking terror into his opponents during the several years of his army leadership.

Part of Zim, as an Invader, had held onto that, whether he knew why or not. At the root of it all, though, was an awful cry for help.

I didn't feel sorry for the Commander. Not really. Not at all. He'd chosen the wrong way to deal with his problems. And he had plenty. He was a sociopath. He was homicidal. He was power-hungry. And he just could not deal with the fact that he'd once felt for someone. He could not accept that he'd been in love, and that was destructive. Because he was taking it out on—well, everything.

"Choose one or the other, Commander!" Gaz yelled at him. "You can't have both! You can't have Miyuki and the Empire, you just can't!"

"That is not within your jurisdiction to decide."

"No, but it isn't in yours, either," Gaz spat back. "You think you can have everything? You can't. Nobody can.

"And I want a world in which things go wrong," my sister continued. Her knuckles paled as she tightened her grip on her daggers, her lip trembled as she spoke, but she held firm, stared down the person who had all but destroyed Zim as he had become, and spoke her peace. "Having everything you want is disgusting, and impossible. The more you get, the more you want, until there's nothing. That's exactly what these fucking Brains are doing, don't you get that?

"Maybe you and Miyuki had something different, but you didn't recognize it back then, and she moved on! You carved out an Empire for her? Well, did she ask you to? I'm gonna doubt that, so I don't blame her for choosing to stay on Earth. She found my dad, and I'm really glad she did or I wouldn't be here. But because she's my mom and because she recognized the flaws in the government that you so pride because it lets you get away with all this stupid killing, I've gotta at least try to help. I've always wanted to help you, Zim.

"You have potential!" she screamed. "You're Original! Don't lose that, Zim, don't fucking lose that! You know what, Commander, you almost got me thinking the way you do. Thinking love is stupid, thinking that emotionlessness is better than feeling pain.

"But fuck that!" she finished. "I'll hate you for being an arrogant asshole and I'll fear you for throwing your power around to kill me, but at the end of the day, Zim, I trust you to do the right thing! SO DO IT!"

"Who are you talking to?" the Commander snarled.

"I'm talking to my FUCKING BOYFRIEND," Gaz snapped. "So do me a favor and get out of my way."

The Commander took pause. And then scowled. Drew his sword. And turned, to turn his blade on me. I yelped, startled from the sudden attack, and barely had time to duck and get out of the way.

Maybe I was better with words, but having that upper hand had truly made me forget just how much more practiced with a sword the Commander must have been than I was. More than I felt I'd ever be. When he struck again, when I countered, I felt heat surge up my arm as if he'd burned me. I spun from the sheer force of the blow, and felt his hand clench around my neck from behind

He tossed me across room, where I collided with my sister, and the two of us fell to the floor. I looked up just in time to see Gerohnod standing over us, eyes gleaming, right palm outstretched and charging a blast. I dismissed my sword right off and threw myself over Gaz, feeling the shock of the blast hit my back a second later.

My head was spinning. Was it just me, or had everyone gone completely crazy?

Yes, was the nagging answer when I was pried off of my sister and charged into the opposite wall by the humanlike thing GIR had become. I really hate getting tossed around. I hate getting screwed over and betrayed. But mostly, I just hate being unnecessarily tested. I wasn't much better than Zim, in that I hated losing… but what set me, and the people I knew, Zim recently included, apart from the Commander was that I, that we, could get back up and move on.

That's just life. You fail, you get back up and try again.

It's hard for someone with such a deep-seated grudge to grasp that concept, I guess.

I scrambled back up to my feet, gathered energy in my right hand, and hurled it at Gerohnod, just in time to spin again to block a swipe the Commander took at me with his dagger charm. He shoved me up against the wall again and kneed me in the ribs as he shouted, "You see?! I am in control here! You fight with only the intent to escape your fear."

"No," I countered, "I'm fighting you because you don't listen."

"You dismiss my strength for petty jealousy!"

"Right. Because your motives are dead. Okay?!" I struggled against him, but he held fast. "You're fighting against something you can't undo! What happened to Miyuki happened! Move on."

I kicked him in the shin, and he laughed and let me go, only to have Gerohnod spring at me while the Commander himself strode toward my sister. He swept out at her, and Gaz countered with her daggers. She made a point not to physically cut him, but use her weapons only for defense.

"You're strong, little girl," the Commander scowled at her, "but your mother was stronger. And if you had not come along, oh, she and I would have seen great things happen."

When he grabbed hold of her this time, Gaz was ready. She grabbed at his palm and wrist so that he had only a slight hold of her neck, and as I dodged Gerohnod's unrelenting attacks, I watched the courage and strength in my sister rise.

"But I am here," Gaz said, keeping her voice level. "I'm here, and so's Dib. We're Miyuki's kids, okay? She moved on. You need to just accept tha—"

The Commander let out an anguished roar and threw her down.

"GAZ!" I cried out. She'd hit the ground hard, and I prayed I hadn't heard a snap.

Gerohnod struck at me over and over with his robotically-enhanced right arm; I countered, and ducked, and swerved and threw a couple punches of my own, but he was lightning-fast. It was all I could do to dodge and counter… I could barely find an opening to attack.

"GET UP!" the Commander shouted at Gaz. "I'll show you the true extent of what I can do!"

He outstretched his arms, and continued, "Miyuki's was a name to be known! You cannot fathom the influence she had as Tallest! Her machines are unparalleled. Her Talisman can travel space, time, dimensions, as near or far as it needs to go, in search of the truth. She and I together were the embodiments of the power our Brain-delegated Talismans possess. As long as both exist, the Prophecy will never pass, and—"

"That's the bitch of prophecies, though, isn't it?" Gaz spat back at him. "They've gotta come true sometime."

The Commander grabbed her up and held Osdraken to her neck. "The Mirror listens to me," he growled at her. "This blade listens to me."

"You wanna know why?"

"Because I have more strength than you could ever comprehend."

Gaz, trembling, shook her head. "Because the Brains own you."

"Insolence."

"You cut out your heart, didn't you? That just made you closer to them. You can still feel, though, right? You can't not be Original."

The Commander pressed his blade closer—

His hand shook.

"ONLY POWER MATTERS!"

"Why?!" Gaz screamed. "Because love didn't work?!"

"Love is worthless!"

"Because it proved you wrong?!"

"SHUT UP." The next voice that had spoken was one I was sure I'd be hearing sooner or later.

All activity in the room ceased when Tak appeared in the doorway opposite the Mirror. She, fully in human hologram, looked like she'd been locked in a pretty heated fight, and while she had obviously either won or had dismissed her opponent, she did not look well. She looked—honestly, let down, though eerily optimistic. Her poignant eyes focused on the Commander, ignoring everything else in the room; her lips were pressed flat together so that she could stop herself from saying another word until spoken to.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say that she looked ready to cry.

I saw my sister mouth, Oh, no… My heart skipped. The answer was pretty obvious, then, as to who she'd been fighting, if Gaz had been teamed up with Skutch, and if the Commander hardly seemed surprised at Tak's arrival. I thought to place a call on my wristwatch, but I was afraid to take my eyes off of the scene currently playing out before me.

"Well," said the Commander, his voice taking on its low, blunt tone yet again. "You survived."

"Commander," Tak addressed her superior, a hint of admiration in her voice, mixed with a twinge of unease. "What is past has passed."

"Tell me the result of your battle," Zim's darker half demanded.

"First, sir, tell me that we can move forward." Tak then noticed me, and Gaz, and Gerohnod. But she did not say anything to us. "Stop wasting your time with what was, sir, I'm begging you. Miyuki is no longer the Tallest. But you are here." She tried to grin, but couldn't. "I brought you here. You can't go back. Remember your position only, and move forward. It will be greater than before. Miyuki's era is over. As long as our race is never taken over by these humans, there is the opportunity to advance. A new Empire, sir. Your Empire. But—"

The Commander snorted. "Let me guess. With you."

"That was my plan. But—" What was her hesitation…?

A stillness fell over the room, and Tak took her eyes off of the Commander for a brief moment when Gerohnod lost interest in me and strode back toward the abandoned platform beside the Mirror.

"You are not to speak ill of Tallest Miyuki," the Commander chastised Tak.

Tak grimaced, but walked into the room. "If you continue to use her Mirror, you'll never kill your ties to her," Tak said sourly.

Exactly his point, I realized. If the Mirror was one that not only revealed but sought out truth… interesting, I thought. For something so tied to the Control Brains that tried to cut out any similarities between the Irkens and humans, the Mirror was certainly something that seemed bent on creating a bridge. One much different than the one Tak had been forging.

What the hell would happen when we broke it to defeat the Brains…?

Assuming that, between Tak, the Commander, and Gerohnod, we made it out of that room, of course. But I was beginning to feel more and more, every second, that we would. This was going to be a victory. A mindbending one, maybe, but a victory all the same.

The Mirror shone.

Something inside it… one of its properties had just been awakened. Gaz noticed, and made a run for it. Before she could sprint her way over, Gerohnod leapt into her path in time to grab her by the arms and spin her away from the Mirror.

When she was turned to face me, I saw tears in my sister's eyes… but I also saw her show a slight smile. Though I could not fathom why.

"I've had enough of this." The Commander snapped his fingers. Gerohnod dropped Gaz to the floor, and instead shot the talon-like appendages on the fingers of his right hand toward Tak; she yelped as the talons sparked, shocking her out of hologram, and extended and wrapped around her chest, squeezing her arms in as they continued emitting snakes of electricity.

Tak's eyes widened, and for a moment, just a moment, she looked nearly human. Even without the hologram. In her monochrome, synthetic eyes was fear. Worry. The desire to trust and the wariness for doing so.

Wait…

"M—MiMi…?" Tak stared at the appendage. Then at Gerohnod, and finally at her Commander. She passed me and Gaz right by, yet again. "Where is… where's…" Tak then snapped. She grated her teeth, and her eyes flashed rapidly. "WHERE IS SHE?!"

Gerohnod shrugged, and shocked her again. "Oops."

Tak screamed in anguish, then opened up her PAK, and exposed her spider legs. The tips charged an enormous laser, which she used to blast Gerohnod back. He eased up his grip, and Tak freed herself, stored the spider legs, and lunged at the Commander, only to drop to her knees. Gaz hurried out of the way, and rushed to stand directly opposite me. She cast her gaze back at the Mirror once, and a faint smile appeared once again on her lips.

"ALL RIGHT!" Tak screamed. "It's… it's all right, it's all right, I can forgive you for that, I—"

"Did I ask for your forgiveness?!" the Commander spat down at her.

"I—"

My watch beeped. Of all the fucking times to get a call. Not that this was a bad thing, I hoped. I held the watch up briefly, and said, "We're kinda busy, but we need backup!"

"I went to get Tenn and them, and we're on the way." Skutch. Good to know. "Red kept goin' and I think he found the Brains, but—"

"Well, we could use you guys' help," I admitted.

"Tak find you?"

"Yeah."

"Shit."

"Were you fighting her?" I wondered.

"Yeah, but then I said somethin' about how MiMi was dead, and she took off."

So MiMi was dead. That really was her arm GIR had now. Interesting. I thanked Skutch and hung up. Backup was on the way, but something told me we weren't going to be having so many opponents much longer.

"Where is Skutch?" the Commander barked at Tak.

"He's—"

"Did you kill him?!"

"Not… exactly, but… sir, it was unnecessary to—"

"TO WHAT?"

"If MiMi is dead, then so is a piece of—"

"You did not fulfill the only mission I gave you?" the Commander snapped.

"That isn't important! What's important is that you live and not that—"

"Get out of my sight."

The Commander turned away from Tak, and strode toward the Mirror, only to instantly jerk back. He turned and stormed away from it, looking ready to strike Tak down, simply to kill someone, out of rage.

At first, she seemed ready. But I guess even Tak was afraid of death. She bowed her head, then picked herself up. "Commander!" she shouted, glaring up at him. "I am not going to lose you to the humans! You're stronger than Miyuki was. You could be the Tallest! We could move forward, take this Empire in a better direction."

"You're spouting nonsense," the Commander argued with her.

"Everything is nonsense to you."

…Impossible.

No, improbable. But it happened.

Zim's voice was coming from the Mirror.

My immediate thought was to look to my sister. She drained of color, then flushed full again as she took in a long, long breath. Her eyes misted, but she did not cry. Her lower lip trembled, but she was able to smile. "Thank you…" she whispered.

The Commander took one more step, and I heard, very distinctly, a rattling of chains, though none could be seen. He then froze, and, without looking at the Mirror, muttered, "You're awake early."

"I figured out your Fear, Commander. I'm not done with you."

Tak whipped her head from the Mirror to the Commander, and when I followed her gaze, I noticed that Osdraken's blade began to emit a slight glow. I was not the only one to catch onto this, apparently: Gerohnod's attention was drawn, and his eyes flashed.

Arms at his sides, the orbs on his palms began to spark somewhat. There was a flashing pulse, alternating soft blue, pale green, and warning red, as if sending a message in morse code. For all I could tell, that was exactly what he was doing. If MiMi had been created with a bit of the Control Brains, and if GIR had held the remainder of the Commander's memories, there was a good chance that we were nearing a moment none of us had really prepared for. Using him as a remote source, the Brains were going to fight back.

"Seems you're a liability after all," he said to the Commander. "As an Original, you compromise your position."

"Liability," the Commander scoffed. "That's absurd."

Before anyone could say another word, Gaz rushed forward, and swiftly punched the Commander's back, directly at the center of his crossed scars. He let out an anguished cry and spun to retaliate, but she, gathering herself, struck his right arm. She then rushed back, energy gathering between her hands, and blasted him, so that he had nowhere to go but closer to the Mirror.

"Look at yourself in the Mirror," Gaz pressured him. "It's Fear of the unknown, isn't it? Fear of truth, and fear of what you can't undo."

"NO!" Tak tried to protest.

"Fear of having no control?" Gaz continued. "Whatever it is, Commander, you're right. You are the embodiment of Fear. You're full of it."

And that was the very moment that I noticed the reflection.

Zim hadn't lost his fight at all.

"It's the fear," I added onto Gaz's statement, "of moving on. The fear of change."

There was so much tied to that.

I had once seen an Irken reflection in my mother's Mirror. So I was prepared for that to pass. I already knew what it was like to have an Irken PAK. Just because I didn't want to become even temporarily Irken did not mean it wasn't a possibility.

The Commander's reflection must always have been human. Afraid of that outcome, he had lashed out. Without digging around in his sordid memories, I'd never know exactly what his process had been, but I figured I'd have the chance to ask Zim someday. If we ever still addressed the Commander and all that he claimed he stood for after this.

He had put so much energy into convincing himself that human emotions were worthless. Spent all of his hours awake and plotting against the species he valued himself over to such a great extent. Over the years, Zim's memories had been tampered with, taunted and tainted. Tak wanted her Commander—to herself. They both aimed to strive for control, but from different angles.

Either way I looked at it, though, love was in there somewhere. Love, trust, hate and fear all together.

Irkens were perfectly capable of having souls.

The Commander was the primary example of someone who knew this, because of how vehemently he denied it. He was denial. He was a grudge. But all he was doing was building up his own fear, for the day it would crash down upon him.

By not accepting the fact that time demands change, he was only on a path to destroying himself. Unless he opened up again, as Zim had started to do. Nobody wants to be stuck in a monochromatic frame of mind forever.

There's so much more to the universe.

"I have control," the Commander spat into the Mirror. "I'm not giving it up now."

"No," Zim's voice rang through. Indeed, the Commander's reflection was not entirely his own. Reflected in the glass was the image we'd grown used to—Zim appeared much, much worse for the wear than even Tak… bloodied, beaten, terribly tired and probably half dead, but he had not given up. He'd held onto his consciousness within the Commander. Ready to embrace the next step in his life. "Time's up," he continued.

One hand reached through the Mirror, and took hold of the Commander's plate of shoulder armor. "We've got some things to negotiate. I'm not letting you keep this charade going any longer."

And with that, the Mirror flashed, and he was gone.

The glass turned to black again, and I half expected Tak to begin railing on and trying to call her Commander back. But she was frozen, stunned, petrified.

Gaz, on the other hand, sheathed her daggers, and took a few silent steps toward the Mirror. She placed her hands delicately on either side. The glass showed no reflection of hers… the Talisman was otherwise preoccupied, able to fulfill only one command at a time. Trembling, my sister leaned up against the glass, and said, her voice steady and moral, "Stay strong."

It was better this way… that Zim would finish the fight against himself.

But that was not to say that the Commander had had wholly unrealistic targets. Dad was probably in trouble by now; the Brains obviously had it out for him. Tak was sure to snap out of her daze any second.

Plus…

"That is not to say that the two of you aren't liabilities as well."

Gaz stepped away from the Mirror when Gerohnod spoke. Slowly, she made her way over to me. When we stood side by side, I could hear her heart beating just as rapidly as mine.

"Prophecies are sooth in some respects," Gerohnod continued, "but We can yet have our say against them."

"Bring it on," I challenged him. "One down, three to go. Let's keep going."

"We aren't afraid of you," my sister added.

And no matter how the Brains, the machines, the SIR units and grudges from the past would try to convince us that we should be, the two of us had moved beyond fear. We were not here to conquer. We were here to mend.

The universe can be seen from several forms of consciousness. But only if one has a consciousness to call their own. Maybe understanding that was all part of having a soul.

I couldn't understand why the Irkens would ever relinquish that to the machines.

Change is a scary thing. Fear can cause change, and be derived from it. It's a cycle, and nobody's really averse to it. That's where flaws come from, but flaws… flaws are what make things interesting. Hate is flawed, trust is flawed, love is flawed. The universe knows that. And it's beautiful.

No, we were not going to conquer the Irken race.

All I wanted to do was share knowledge. Open doors. Embrace the changes that were bound to come, in whatever way I could. We needed to fight, and we needed to reason.

The only thing that needed to be conquered was fear. And each and every one of us were well on our way.

– – –

– – –

Author's Note:

Hi! So sorry about the delay… and after a hiatus, too! ^^;; Thank you for your patience with my crazy schedule. Between parts 3 and 4, I needed to take a long break, in the interest of having a rest but also because my schedule is kind of insane (I have to travel a lot), and I wanted to prepare part 4 in the event that that would happen again. Well—it happened again. XD So, sorry for the delay, but I do want to warn that more delays might happen in the coming weeks, or I might switch to an every-other week schedule (I did that with the other fic series I regularly update too).

Anyway, I'm getting ranty… ^^;;;; I just like being able to provide a reason for delays and hiatuses (hiati?); and again, if things ever do get pushed back, I'll keep my profile updated!

I like Dib as a narrator; he's fun to write. (The original version of this chapter actually swapped back and forth between Dib and Gaz, and I wanted to switch it into just one voice.) It's been fun to revisit this thing I'd written such a long time ago, even if it does feel kinda weird to be close to the end again… (Ack!) Thank you so, so much for reading! It means a lot~ ^^ As always, more answers are on the way! Still only about 1/3 of the way through Part 4 (I'm excited to get the other characters back in…!)… :3

If all goes as planned, I'll see you next Friday, August 31st! But I'll be sure to update my profile by Wednesday if that needs to change due to travel craziness. :3 In any event, many thanks for reading, and see you soon~!

~Jizena

– – –