Sniff…sob…hick…you guys are so sweet!
Kyo: Get a grip! You're making us look bad.
Trunks: This is so embarrassing.
Star: (to readers) You guys are all being nice about the deaths! To be quite honest, I didn't know the deceased at all, but it affected my family which affected me and it just was a downward spiral. Thanks for your concern! This chap is dedicated to you! (sobs more)
Kyo: (sighs) She doesn't own anyone, so don't sue her. Besides, she'll probably cry worse than this if you tried. And that's sad.
It was getting to the point where Piccolo's eye twitch was becoming chronic. He went to the doctor to try and get some medicine, but the doctor said medicine wouldn't help. He could only suggest that Piccolo should avoid whatever was causing the problem.
Piccolo laughed him out of the office.
Now it was only five hours before the Christmas Eve party at the Briefs' house. The Namekian, twitch and all, was waiting downstairs for his accomplice. "Goku! What the hell is taking you so long?"
"I'm just finishing up my letter to Santa! I'll be right down!"
Knowing that it wasn't his fault and he couldn't do anything, Piccolo began to meditate in a corner.
When he opened his eyes again, he saw two large, black orbs smiling at him. "Gaaah! Goku, get away from me!"
"Aw, don't you want to read my letter?"
"Will we go right after?"
"Of course!"
"Fine. Give it to me."
Deer Santa,
I wuz hoping yu culd help me and mi frend, Picolo, get Bullma and Vegeeta together. I wood like that vry much.
GOkU
"Wow, Goku, you continue to amaze me every day with the depth of your incompetence."
"Thank you!"
Piccolo's eye started twitching so hard, he began to hover. "Let's go show Yamcha what we're made of."
In a brief moment of sanity, Goku remembered that he could immediately transport Piccolo and himself to Yamcha's house. What he didn't realize was that Yamcha would be in his harem again.
"Yo, bros, what up!" Yamcha greeted as the girls around him all chorused their laughter. Goku laughed uncomfortably while Piccolo hovered in all his twitchy glory. The drunk girls were bedazzled by this flying green man.
"Yamcha," Piccolo said through his teeth, "can Goku and I talk to you?"
"Sure. Whaddaya need?"
"Well, since tonight is the Christmas Eve party, Bulma wanted us to tell you that it's a BYOB party."
"A bob?"
"No. B. Y. O. B. Bring your own beer."
"Oh, right. I knew that…."
Goku suddenly turned to Piccolo in horror and said, "We forgot OUR beer!" a comment that brought him an immediate slap to the head.
"As I was saying," Piccolo continued, "you'll need to stock up for the party."
"No prob! Wanna help me pack?"
"Actually, Goku and I are volunteering to do it for you."
Yamcha gave them a huge grin. "Thanks! Beer's in the fridge!"
Piccolo dragged Goku into the kitchen and shut the door. "Okay Goku, here's the game plan."
"Ooh, we're going to play a game!"
The Namekian paused, then a slow smile spread across his face like the Grinch. But this time, he wasn't stealing Christmas.
It was taking them forever to pack up the beer cans. First had to screw off the bottle caps, dump the beer down the drain, then refill the bottles with hard liquor before replacing the top and putting the "beer" in the cooler.
Goku job was twisting off the tops. "Aw, but Piccolo," he whined, "why can't I dump it down the drain?"
"Because you'd just end up spilling it and we don't have time to waste cleani—" Goku accidentally dumped the bottle he had just opened on the floor.
"Oops."
Quickly, Piccolo turned his back to Goku and chugged the beer he was holding in his hand. It didn't taste that great, but at least it eased the twitching. He then turned back to Goku. "Clean up the mess while I fill the cooler."
Surprisingly, it was a lot faster when Piccolo was working on his own. Well, it wasn't actually surprising that it worked that way, but it sounded good, didn't it?He was adding the last of the bourbon to some beer bottles. Every so often he'd take a slug. Kind of. "One for you, one for me. Two for you, one two for me. Three for you, one two three for me…."
Goku had finished moping up the beer with a rag, so he decided to duel with the shady character in the corner.
"Goku," Piccolo hiccupped, "that's your shadow."
"No it is—oh, yes it is. Sorry." He sat down sadly as his accomplice finished up the last bottle.
"Yamcha's going to make an ass out of himself," Piccolo cackled. "All according to plan…." He began to laugh harder and eviler, if that's a word.
Goku just stared dejectedly at his friend. "I don't get it…."
I hope I'm getting back in my writing-rhythm here. I've been a very bad girl….
Kyo: (grumbling) I'll say you have.
Star: It's all for you, love.
Kyo: GAAAH! I'M NOT YOUR LOVE!
Star: (looks around) Wait a second…where's Kedo?
Kid Buu: Grrawr! (gnaws on Kedo)
Kedo: What the hell! Why is he eating my arm?
Star: I dunno. But honestly, people are getting jealous that you're here. Apparently, the girls think that someone close to Trunks is bad.
Kedo: But I'm a guy!
Kyo: Well, we all know which way Trunks swings…or should I say ways?
Trunks: SHUT UP!
Kedo: Why wouldn't they be jealous of you, Star?
Star: Everyone knows that Kyo and I are an item. (dreamy look in Kyo's direction)
Kyo: What the hell is wrong with you?
Star: I dunno, but I'm confident it's hard to pronounce. (to readers) Thanks for reading! Ciao, bello!
Trunks: (sigh) Why me?
