Annie sighed quietly against Jeff's shoulder causing a responsive flutter in his chest. It was a relief, the first indication her shock was wearing off though he was hesitant to put her down until they reached a safe distance.
He was deliberately heading away from the library -where he figured Troy and Abed would go- and was leading them towards the lost property room. There were a bunch of blankets still left in there from the pillow fort monstrosity and maybe even some clothes she could change into. Ideally he would've liked to get her straight home but he couldn't abandon his two friends, no matter much they were probably enjoying the role playing game.
He rounded the last corner feeling a little more relaxed as they reached the door. Not surprising the lock wasn't hard to shimmy open and he eased Annie down, offering a sympathetic smile as he flicked on the light switch.
She recognised the look as one she was going to regret and gripped his arm, following wordlessly as he trudged towards a pile of linen.
Finding the biggest, thickest woollen blanket in the lot, he pulled it out giving it a hefty shake. When the dust settled he opened it up again and drew it tightly around her tiny frame. "Annie..." he breathed out slowly, squeezing her shoulder, "I need to go find Troy and Abed so I want you to wait here ok?"
"I-"
Her voice squeaked in an unnaturally high tone as she bunched the fabric between her fists. She didn't want to be alone... but at the same time didn't want Troy and Abed to be left alone with Rory. "Go, I'll be ok."
He smiled softly and it caused an irrational sense of foreboding to leap into her stomach, "but what if, I mean... what if this is the part where you leave and he comes back?"
Jeff could see the fear in her eyes and pounced on his first thought, "he won't, Abed said this wasn't a horror movie." The ridiculous statement reverberated in his mind and he shook his head in annoyance, "damnit... we really need to start expanding our circle of friends."
He hoped the sarcasm might at least draw a smile but there was no change in her expression and he stepped forward brushing her arm, "Annie I'm not going to let anything happen to you... which is why I need to make sure this situations being handled properly. I won't be long I promise."
She nodded forcing herself to be brave.
After all it was her stubbornness that had gotten them into this mess. She thought she could help Rory, pull him back from the clutches of addiction but really it was just another task she had failed at. "I'm sorry I dragged you into this-" she tore her gaze away from him, staring at her soaked shoes but his soft voice surprised her.
"I'm sorry I didn't try to help you..." he pressed gently, finding the apology was easier than he'd thought it would be. Not because he liked Rory -he really didn't- but because he and the rest of the group should have offered their support. They were so quick to judge but none of them had wanted to get involved, to help someone outside of their circle and if she had gotten hurt they would have only had themselves to blame.
Well, and Rory.
In fact... mainly Rory.
"Stay here, I'll be right back." He gave her shoulder another a quick squeeze and she immediately missed the warmth as he pulled away.
She could do this.
She just needed to find something to do, something to keep her thoughts occupied until he returned.
His footsteps disappeared out the door and she glanced around. There was certainly enough useless piles to sort through. Had she not been in a semi state of shock she might have even found the task a little bit exciting but as it was she settled for 'an adequate distraction', wading through to a large box. It was filled with sporting goods and she proceeded to churn through the items, pulling out pair of slacks that smelt like mothballs. It was a step up from dirty socks and she shrugged them on tying them tightly around her waist. They were huge but warm and she dug further into the box fishing out an old Greendale sweatshirt.
She was about to tug off her dress when a shadow caught her attention and her gaze immediately snapped to the door.
It was nothing.
Just a moth circling the dim light but her heart was racing from the false alarm and she instinctively took a step back into the aisle. When she'd managed to calm herself down she quickly changed and tossed the wet garment aside.
"Ok Annie, focus... you can do this, this is what you're good at-" she mumbled, kneeling down to add some semblance to the randomly placed junk.
It worked, for the most part. She managed to keep herself sane long enough to alphabetise a draw of old cassette tapes and it was only when she heard the sound of footsteps coming down the hall that she started to panic again. Swallowing her fear she picked up the nearest object she could find and edged out into the open.
"Hey..." Jeff appeared at the door, his eyes drawn to the furry stuffed dog in her hand.
"Nothing-" she quickly threw it aside, ignoring the squeak as it bounced, "are you ok? Rory is he-"
"He'll be fine, we called the police and they're taking him to the hospital."
She sighed feeling a wave of relief as he stepped over the pile of water pistols and comic books separating them. She could tell he was concerned. There was rare crease of sincerity in his brow and she forced a smile trying to convince them both she was ok.
The assurance didn't quite reach her eyes and he stopped in front of her feeling something tighten in his chest. Watching her trying to be brave was even worse than being subjected to her disney eyes. At least under those he knew she was trying to be manipulative but there was nothing fake about the emotion pooling behind her gaze and he couldn't help himself. He reached out brushing his hand against the side of her cheek and wished for the first time he could shoulder someone else's pain.
She lent into the touch pressing her lips together in a small pout. They shouldn't be doing this. She was beyond exhausted, not thinking straight and he was probably just pumped with adrenaline but she didn't try and stop the inevitable movement.
Instead she breathed in the taste of him, clutching his damp shirt as he pulled her closer. She wanted to lose herself in the kiss, drown in its warmth but something stopped her and the hesitation wormed its way throughout her body. Did he really care... or was she some sort of victory prize? Jeff one, Rory zero.
Anger jolted through her and she shoved him back wincing as he collided with the shelving unit. The impact caused a box of hacky sacks to rock dangerously close to the edge and she covered a gasp as it fell, pelting him with the vibrant sand filled balls.
"Ow!... Jesus-" Jeff rubbed the top of his head, cautiously checking to make sure nothing else was going to fall on him before directing his attention back to her, "seriously, what the hell?"
She felt a tiny wave of guilt but it quickly faded as she stepped forward prodding him in the chest, "you think you can just swoop in and kiss me because it suits you, I have a boyfriend remember?"
"Yeah I do-" he didn't bother trying to hide his astonishment, "I remember how he just tried to throw you off the roof and turn you into a human pancake... but no, you're right... great guy, total keeper."
His sarcasm pierced her bubble of anger, replacing it with a wave a sadness. She was never going to trust Rory again, at least not until he kicked his addiction and even then there were no guarantees. She'd lost her boyfriend, her study group, her friends... and the worst part, the absolute worst part was staring right her in the face.
She'd spent weeks convincing herself she was over him, that she could finally move on but one kiss had sparked every emotion back to life. To Jeff it was going to be another mistake, something else to bury under the rug and she felt tears sting her cheeks. She couldn't go through that humiliation again... not with everything else falling a part.
"Annie, shit... I'm sorry, please... don't cry-" he stuttered, cursing himself for being such an insensitive asshole.
He should take take it back, lie through his teeth and tell her it was going to be ok, that maybe she and Rory would find a way to work things out... but he couldn't bring himself to do it. What if he hadn't been around tonight or worse, what if he wasn't around next time?
"I... I want you."
The words fell out of his mouth before he could stop them and he took a deep breath trying to calm his racing nerves.
Fuck.
He was in too deep to back out now so he did the only thing he could do, he ploughed ahead, "you deserve better than Rory... but you also deserve better than me which is why I can't tell you what to do... but if nothing else than as your friend I am asking you, just be careful... because I don't want to see anything happen to you."
She stood frozen in place, his words hammering through her chest. After four years of speculation the humble acknowledgement made it impossible to doubt he was being genuine. The old Jeff would have boasted self-confidence, expected her to drop everything to be with him but she could read the faint hint of embarrassment playing under his concern. "Say it again."
She folded her arms, half expecting him to take it back and letting out a small gasp when he spoke without hesitation.
"I want you-" he challenged, fighting the part of himself that wanted to deny the honesty. Being open didn't come naturally to him but if the last few weeks had taught him anything it was that rejection wasn't always the worst case scenario.
"I... I don't know what to say?" Her heart leapt into her throat as she stared at him. The sane thing to do would be to walk away, maybe even transfer to a different school or another country... but she couldn't tear herself away from his gaze as he stepped forward.
"Say yes," he breathed out, stretching his hand against her cheek.
"But that... doesn't make any sense-" she stuttered, trying to keep her composure but failing miserably. She knew she was beat. If he woke up tomorrow and decided he never wanted to see her again then she was going to be twice the fool but her heart wanted to take the risk regardless.
He tilted his head slightly. She was right, it didn't make any sense... at least not in a grammatical 'I've asked you a question, this should be your answer' kind of way but the allusion was there all the same. "Then don't say anything..." he robbed her of another chance to stall, "just kiss me."
She nodded without moving and he took it as his cue, pulling her closer and capturing her lips. This he was good at. The ground rules, the talking, the grand gestures and decelerations... not so much and if he'd thought not being with her was complicated, it was going to take a miracle to get him though actually 'dating' her.
But he wanted to.
More than any other ballsy, stupid, ridiculous idea he'd ever entertained in his life.
And if Greendale had taught him anything, it was that sometimes the craziest plans were the ones that worked out the best.
x
x
AN: One more chapter to go! :)
