"That's preposterous!" Superman snapped back.

"Is it?" Xander asked. "Everything I've managed to access shows that you have stopped all research into space travel – "

"Mankind has no need of space travel right now and the technologies involved are far too volatile to trust them with at this point in their development," Batman interrupted. "The League made the decision, not just Superman."

"Species develop and become civilized by facing challenges, you can't simply wait for them to develop that way when you're taking away the very reason they did so," Xander argued. "But even putting that aside, you seem to have forbidden most areas of scientific research and confined them to a single planet; how is that not killing them? If an alien invasion or an accident doesn't wipe them out then the way you're crushing their spirit certainly will! You should already be seeing the evidence in falling birthrates and rising number of suicides."

Eyes turned towards Batman who paused his attack on Xander to check on the relevant statistics. His increasing frown said more than anything spoken so far, as he consulted database after database, cross-checking statistics. Finally, he stopped and directed his gaze at Xander once more. "Explain!" he ordered.

"What's to explain?" Xander asked.

"I'm not seeing how our actions have led to this," Batman admitted.

"Oh," Xander said, surprised it wasn't obvious. "You've locked mankind in a cage with no hope of escape. What did you think would happen? Mankind as a whole needs new places to explore, new things to discover. Without that… what reason is there to go on?"

"Mankind was well on the path to self-destruction without our help," Superman said.

"That's debatable," Xander said. "Mankind has always walked the line between civil and savage, it's in our nature. Don't pretend Kryptonians are any different! Your people tried to pretend otherwise, and it ended up with the majority of your race dead and I don't want to see that happen to humanity!"

"And what would you have done in our place?" Superman demanded angrily. "Stand by and do nothing?!"

"No," Xander said, shaking his middle head, as the other two were still going over League Records, "I'm not saying you should have done nothing. Hell, I'm not even saying you were completely wrong in your actions. What I'm saying is, you have a few more steps to go before you can consider the job done and by done I don't mean mankind is safe and you can rest. Mankind is never going to be safe in any sense of the word, the best you can do is create a frontier to send the dreamers and madmen to because looking after the human race is a job that never ends."

"And where should this frontier be?" Batman asked calmly, his cowled face giving nothing away.

"While FTL isn't something mankind should have yet, they should be exploring the solar system and working on terraforming the other planets," Xander said. "You keep a tight rein at the core and you let the developing frontier run wild," Xander explained.

"The core would provide stability to those that valued a safe stable life while the disruptive elements would naturally be drawn to the rim, where they would have the freedom to do as they liked," Batman said thoughtfully. "The core would expand as the frontier did, keeping everything in balance."

"As in balance as humanity ever is," Xander agreed. "Plus it keeps humanity spread out, so a single disaster is less likely to wipe it out."

"The technology needed is at least half a century away," Green Lantern pointed out.

"… You do realize that with you in complete control of society, you're free to release any technology you want without having to worry about it causing problems," Xander said.

"I am not completely convinced, but there is a strong possibility you are correct," Batman admitted. "It'll take years to put such a project in place and in that time I'll have gathered all the data I need to prove or disprove your supposition."

Xander turned and stared with all three heads.

"What?!" Shayera said, losing patience.

"Sorry, I just… I'm not used to dealing with people who actually listen to reason," Xander admitted.

"I know the feeling," Green Lantern said. "I think we all do."

"If they actually listened to reason, they wouldn't be supervillains," Wonder Woman pointed out.

"I was referring to the heroes actually," Xander said. "To be fair I was almost as big a douchebag as your Lex up to that point, but you'd think saving Power Girl would have at least bought me a few seconds of good will," he muttered, recalling recent events.

"You were a supervillain?" Superman asked, eyes narrowing.

"Nope, normal everyday asshole," Xander said. "I picked up powers after I decided to stop being a prick."

"But were you a villain?" Batman asked.

"I was a corrupt businessman, so yeah I was a bigger villain than a number of powered ones," Xander agreed. "I'm not sure who I was really matters at this – What happened to Mercy?!" Xander exclaimed, his other two heads swiveling to stare at a monitor.

"Luthor!" Superman exclaimed, leaping to his feet, eyes glowing red.

Xander grew a fourth head. "There's the irrational idiocy I've grown to expect," he deadpanned, as the League leapt into action and he shifted back into his Luthor form.

*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*

"Resequencing complete," the Lab's AI announced as it rotated Lois' tube into a supine position and begin removing IV's and draining the liquid that she was suspended in.

Superman waited anxiously, practically dancing from foot to foot as he waited to see the end result of Lois' rash actions.

"Clark?" she muttered as she woke, a number of tiny circular band-aids covering where the IV's had been inserted, but completely clean and dry, as whatever fluid had surrounded her left no trace seconds later.

"Lois!" Superman exclaimed, sweeping her up in his arms, relieved she was okay.

"Someone's happy to see me," she said as she slowly came awake and examined herself. 'My skins a little paler,' she thought. 'But my breasts got a nice bump up in size. I hope we got a little more in back to help compensate,' she added. "So what do you think?"

"I think it was needlessly reckless and something we should have talked about first," he said, squeezing her to him. "But you really can't get much safer than doing it here and it is your body, so I really can't complain even with all the worrying you put me through."

"You're learning," she teased.

"And you're weight has tripled," he teased right back.

"What?!" she exclaimed, quickly looking herself over. "Hah! Good one, farmboy. You had me worried for a second there."

Superman grinned. "I said your weight, not your size. Your tissue density has increased quite a bit. You now weight over three hundred pounds."

Lois shrugged. "As long as I'm still a size four I don't care." She ran a finger down his chest. "So… what do you think?"

"I think you look beautiful as always," he said, the sincerity in his voice having its usual effect as she wiggled to be put down, eyes scanning the room for a comfortable flat surface.

Superman set her down and she pushed him towards the scanning bed, but between one step and the next he found himself blushing as Lois seemed to multiply, three of them standing naked in front of him.

Lois, Lois and Lois paused to examine herself, each turning slowly so the other two could get a good look.

"This is an improvement," they chorused with matching smirks.

"We should – " Superman began when the three quickly resumed pushing him towards the scanning bed.

"It can wait," Lois said as they pulled at his costume.

"Well… If you're sure," Superman found himself agreeing nervously.

*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*

"Joy," Xander said as he manually wired up the Lab's red sun projectors to the batteries used for emergency lighting in case of complete loss of power. Sure it wouldn't do much against the combined might of the Justice League, but it would at least keep Superman from trying to vaporize him while the others talked some sense into him.

The sound of a bulkhead being torn apart as Superman bypassed the security doors Xander had triggered caused him to sigh. "I swear, the heroes are worse than the villains."

"You would know, Luthor," Batman said over the monitor, keeping it on even as he crawled through a vent.

"Exactly," Xander agreed. "I have talked to both groups and with the exception of some literal lunatics, heroes are by far the group most prone to leaping into action without pausing for thought. Seriously, would it kill you guys to actually try and talk rather than just attacking people?"

"Fine," Batman said. "Would you mind surrendering?"

"Sure," Xander said. "I surrender." He'd expanded his mass until he was a six inch slab of material covering the entire floor of the lab with four complete bodies projecting upwards from it.

"Release the security and gravitational controls," Batman ordered.

Xander quickly typed something into the station occupied by the body hacking the control system. "Done."

Batman paused, surprised. 'Release the emergency lockdown."

"Done," Xander said, security door retracting and the alarms falling silent.

"Turn off the red solar cells," Batman ordered.

"If I do that, Superman is going to vaporize my head," Xander informed him. "The other heroes are more than powerful enough to take me into custody without Blue Boy and his anger issues."

"I highly doubt he'll go that far," Batman replied.

"Fine, but I reserve the right to say I told you so," Xander said, the fourth body unwiring the red-sun lights.

*BOOM!* *ZAP!*

"I told you so," the fourth Xander said, after Superman had burst through the wall and melted the head of the Xander talking to Batman.

"Stand Down!" Batman ordered Superman as he dropped out of a vent into the lab.

Wonder Woman and Green Lantern rushed through the lab doors pausing to stare as a headless Luthor stumbled around before falling to its knees and collapsing to the floor of the lab twitching.

Superman looked horrified for a moment before noticing the other three Luthors.

"I told you he was going to vaporize my head," the fourth Luthor told Batman.

"Your head melted and it caused you no real damage," Batman countered.

"It's the principle of the thing," Xander argued.

Wonder Woman lassoed number four while Green Lantern approached Luthor one and two who ignored everyone else as they went over League files.

"Why are you here?" Wonder Woman asked.

"To find out why you guys became fascists," Xander replied, finding himself compelled to answer.

"What did you do to your Flash?" Superman demanded, as Shayera arrived.

"I slipped him some tongue," Xander replied, causing everyone to stare at him in shock. "What? I get along with my Flash, I am not a douchebag Luthor!" He blushed heavily and forced himself to stop babbling.

"And your Superman?" Wonder Woman asked cautiously, not sure she wanted an answer.

"We had a little talk and he went to have a discussion about anal lube with Batman," Xander replied, recalling his talk with Mxyzptlk.

"What kind of universe do you come from?" Shayera asked in shock.

"One that branched off from this one pretty early on in Superman's career," Xander answered. "And that branching point was the arrival of a fifth dimensional being who challenged Superman mentally. Looking over the files I also can't find any mention of Batmite, so your Batman is also a bit different than mine."

"Explain," Batman ordered.

"Alright," Xander agreed. "Batman and Superman have attracted the attention of two beings of power, fifth dimensional imps, the ones stories of genies and such are based on. Mxyzptlk challenged Superman to various contests which required him to become more mentally flexible and lead to him relying more on his wits than his power. My Superman is less physically powerful than the one here, but far more stable and intelligent."

"And me?" Batman asked when Xander stopped to marshal his thoughts as he realized the implications of some of the things he'd discovered.

"Seeing what Mxyzptlk was up to, a younger imp who named himself Batmite started to do something similar to Batman, but to far different effect. He's the one who made sure Gotham wouldn't change and that Batman was properly challenged. Both are, for lack of a better word, refining the pair. Both of my versions of you two are more themselves in a way I haven't quite quantified yet, but is obvious by their behavior. My Superman is not an asshole at all and his faith in humanity in unshakable. My Batman is more of an asshole and his will unassailable."

"I don't know what to do with this knowledge," Batman admitted after a few seconds.

Xander shrugged. "There's nothing really to do with it. Your universe is what it is and I've given you my best analysis on what to do to help the human race. You'll note that I didn't say the best thing to do to be heroes, because you are no longer that. You've become the villain of this Earth, and to save the human race you'll have to continue on this path while letting others be heroes."

Silence fell, none of them knowing what to say and after a couple of minutes Wonder Woman asked, "How do we send you home?"

"Have Batman call for Batmite, if that doesn't work, I have a couple of ideas for how to calculate my quantum signature and open a gate home," Xander replied.

"Batmite!" Batman called out loudly causing a small super deformed figure to appear dressed in a campy grey and blue version of his costume.

"Hey!" Batmite called out looking around. "How'd you know to call me in a control universe?"

"That would be me," Xander said.

"Xander!" Batmite said cheerfully. "What are you doing here?"

"Mxyzptlk gave me a time-out while he was playing with Superman and I need a ride home when he finishes," Xander replied. "I think I've overstayed my welcome here."

Batmite nodded. "I can see that. Being gifted with the ability to see to the heart of things would really rub the locals raw, but I can't send you home, the best I can do is send you back to Lex's dimension."

"That's the home I meant," Xander agreed.

"Plus Mercy," the two Xanders going through the files reminded him.

"Plus the local version of Mercy," Xander added. "I don't think she is needed here and this way I won't cause trouble returning for her later."

"Yeah, when Mxyzptlk decided to keep you, we knew these things would happen," Batmite said cheerfully, snapping his fingers.

The two vanished with the sound of a popping bubble.

"Control universe?" Green Lantern asked.

*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*

"Keep me?" Xander asked, surprised to find himself back in his standard Lex form, but the sight of the hospital bed with a comatose Mercy Graves on it drove the thought from his head. He quickly grabbed the medical chart from the foot of her bed and scanned through it, blessing the imp for his help. Once he was done he returned the chart and considered his options.

Xander realized he knew of a handful of reliable ways to heal someone in the DC universe, the most reliable of which was surprisingly simple. He leaned over Mercy and kissed her forehead, as a jungle safari outfit formed on his body. "You get your rest, I've got to go hunt down a hero!"

Typing By – Sitheus Maximus