Let's be honest, no matter how much everyone wants me to own Disney or Square Enix, it'll never happen, and believe it or not, it might be for the best that I don't own it. I would screw the company by investing everything we had into the Hot Pocket companies.

The Organization's Problems

Chapter 9

Hey everybody, dory for the VERY late update. Please forgive me, as I've been rather busy the last few days. By the way, "plonkle/plonkling/plonkled is my word. It means to set something down.

Day Three…

"Okay… should I even ask how did this happened?"

Xemnas had just entered the joined rooms of Marluxia, Saix, Axel, Luxord, Xigbar, Xaldin, Vexen, Hershal, and for some reason, Sora the Keyblade Wielder.

"How the hell did I end up in here!" Screamed Sora when Xemnas came in.

"Like I said. Should I ask how this happened?" Immediately everyone but Sora spoke up. It was all just a bunch of jibber-jabber unless you were looking for one individual voice. "SHUT UP!" Everyone did. "Now, one at a time, you're going to tell me what happened, and if you act up, I will stab you in the face. Marluxia, you'll go first."

"Superior, Saix beat the hell out of me because I swore in front of Xion." Saix gave Marluxia a death glare, obviously noting the "hell" in her sentence.

"Alright," Xemnas said, "That sounds acceptable. Axel, how about you?"

Axel was still holding his crotch from the pain induced by a seven year old ramming a keyblade onto his crotch.

"Um… Superior? Axel was hit in the balls and gut by Xion and Saix."

"Good enough. Xigbar, what happened to you and Ten?"

"I figured out this little bastard was cheating and we beat the bloody hell out of each other." Luxord nodded in agreement, as if he hadn't just been hospitalized.

"Fine. Xaldin, what in the word happened to you? You look like you were dropped onto a highway during rush-hour." For short, he had long black marks streaked all along his tiny body, and his little red head ball had gone flat.

"Namine lost me at Wal-Mart, and I was ran over by a small army of soccer moms trying to get on sale Cheese-it's for the noon game."

"What?" Xemnas said urgently, "Why wasn't I told that Wal-Mart had Cheese-It's on sale? DAMN ITTTTTTT! Okay, Vexen, what happened to… you?" Xemnas gave an angry stare at Hershal. "Hello there, Hershal. Remember me?"

A few moments passed with Hershal either scratching his head or rubbing his chin.

"Nope, sure don't, Lady. But you remind me of this real loser I met at ComiCon a few years back. 'Cept he was real ugly. I mean UGLY. I think he'd have been related donkeys, but I figured out that he wasn't, seeing as how a donkey can put up a struggle in a fight. But that guy, what a weakling, I mean, he was absolutely pathetic."

Xemnas' eyes had gone a dark shade of red, and she wore a sinister smile that that Hershal couldn't see.

"That's right, asshole, keep digging yourself a deeper hole." Xemnas cracked her knuckles loudly

Vexen leaned over to his old pal, tapped his shoulder, and started whispering something to him. What Vexen said might have been along the lines of "Shut up that's him." Or "Shut the hell up you A-hole! That's the guy whose ass you kicked. He wants to kill you, and you're immobilized and laying on a freaking gurney."

Two Minutes Later…

"I give! I give! Just stop it!" said Hershal, trying to heal a bloody nose while escaping a head-lock.

Xemnas released him from the lock, allowing him to breathe once more.

"Alrighty then. Now, Vexen, what did you say happened to you?"

Vexen took a nervous gulp. Never before had she seen the Superior use such violent means of torture on an incapacitated person.

"Well… You see… um, when Hershal and I were formulating which chemicals to use in the cure, a bunch of ninjas came in and did this to us."

After a moment of silence, Xemnas walked up to Vexen, gave her a pitiful look, and elbowed her in the stomach.

"DON'T YOU DARE LIE TO ME! WHAT THE HELL WOULD NINJAS BE DOING IN THE CASTLE!"

"Soup…earer…reary…nen...gas…peace…st…hobbit."

"What?" asked Xemnas, giving a goofy smile and scratching the back of her head. "Maybe I hit you a bit too hard. Were you just trying to tell me something about the Lord of the Rings, because I heard the hobbit part."

Vexen took a large breathe, "Superior, really, ninjas, and stop it."

"Okay then. I'll kill those damn ninjas if they stole my Cheese-It's. Oh… Sora, what happened to you?"

"Meh," he said shrugging, "Probably something to do with the AUTHOR needing a fresh character to use for comic relief."

"Wait a sec! I thought I was the new comic relief!" yelled a distressed Hershal.

"NO, HERSHAL, YOU ARE NOT THE NEW COMIC RELIEF. SORA AND I ARE HERE FOR THAT. YOU ARE HERE FOR THE CURE, AND NOTHING ELSE." I said, growing tired of not having a part in the story.

"Who the hell was that?" asked Xemnas, trying to locate the origin of my voice.

"That was the AUTHOR. He's the guy who dictates everything in our side of Kingdom Hearts."

Xemnas raised a fist towards the ceiling. "Well he's a real douchebag!"

I grew angry with the silver-haired man-turned-woman. "IF YOU DON'T SHUT THE HELL UP, I WILL WRITE THAT YOU ARE NOW PREGNANT."

Xemnas went into hiding in the corner, shutting up as she went.

"See you later, RFPR!"

"GOOD-BYE, SORA, I LOOK FORWARD TO OUR NEXT MEETING. BY THE WAY, SORRY ABOUT EARLIER, AXEL." everyone heard a barrage of clacking sounds that came from nowhere, and Sora and Axel (and even Axel's nearly broken frijoles) were completely healed, and out of their gurneys.

"Thanks RFPR!" both of the healed said in unison.

"So… how are we going to transition into the next part of the story?" asked Marluxia.

"I HAVE AN IDEA. I CAN TRANSITION VERY WELL." More clacking sounds came from nowhere.

Several Hours Later And Back At The Castle That Never Was And Stuffs…

"Wait a sec! What the hell am I doing here?" screamed Sora urgently.

"I ALREADY TOLD YOU, YOU'RE THE NEW COMIC RELIEF. NOW SHUT UP AND ROLL WITH IT."

"Okay," Xemnas said pulling out her keys, "let's get inside. It's hot out here." As they approached the large gray and other black doors, everyone started to hear muffled yelling.

Xemnas pushed open the doors and was taken away by the sheer amount of voices. There must have been five dozen people all chanting the same thing in unison.

"CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!" That's all anybody could hear until they reached the living room.

Down on the floor, lying on their backs, long plastic tubes that led up to funnels in their mouths, sat Xion, Roxas, Larxene, and Demyx.

Each person had a gallon of different liquid being poured into their funnels. Roxas had what looked like whole milk, Xion seemed to have either beer or apple juice, Demyx almost certainly had a pack of Mike's, and as far as anyone could tell, Larxene was drinking tequila.

"Damn it. Why wasn't I invited to this drinking contest?" Sighed Xigbar.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" yelled the superior, almost instantly silencing the crowd of people, save for one young man that unfortunately was standing next to Xemnas. He had a half empty whisky bottle in his right hand, and about four hundred bucks in the other, and out of his mouth still came the chugging cheer.

"Damn it. Why wasn't I told there would be gambling?" sighed Luxord.

Though the yell of the crowd had ceased, the chugging still commencing.

Xemnas gripped the happy drinker by his shirt and lifted his a few inches off the ground. "I'll ask again you bastard. What. The. Hell. Is. This."

His face went immediately sober. "Hey! What the hell, bitch! It's just a party. Just chill."

"Finished!" yelled a female voice. Xion stood up, well tried at least, but ended with just holding up her empty gallon bottle. The crowd came back, louder than before, and now it wasn't organized. It was just wild cheering. Maybe Xion wasn't drinking the apple juice. Xemnas released the drinker.

After a few moments of stumbling around, Xion passed out. A guy from the crowd picked Xion up in a fireman's carry and plonkled her on the slightly uncomfortable sofa.

"Done!" said the other three drinkers in unison. They showed their empty bottles, and the crowd cheered a little more.

The guy who set Xion on the couch stepped into the middle of the drinkers held up his hands, and said, "Winner: Xion!"

"Alright!" yelled Xemnas, "Now that you've gotten these underage drinkers wasted, you all have to get the hell out of here before I stick all your heads in the person next to yours ass."

The people sped out of the room so fast that they almost left skid marks. Xemnas stomped over to the three losers of the contest.

"What the hell? I left for eight hours and you begin a party and drinking contest? Where's Lexeaus? I put him in charge, and he lets this happen.

Superior. Said a curly voice in Xemnas' head, I'm sorry I couldn't stop them.

"Where the hell are you?"

Look up.

Xemnas glanced at the ceiling, and there stood Lexeaus.

"Get down from there." Xemnas said bluntly.

I can't, Larxene glued my feet to the ceiling.

"Hmmm… alright then! You'll just have to stay there until the glue wears out. So…Who wants some cheerios?"

Well, not the ending I wanted, but it'll work, I guess. Again, sorry for the lateness. Oh, and could you just take a second and fill out my poll that resides on my profile. Thanks.

So until the next chapter, Read, Review, and just keep being Radical,

RFPR.