Kyla: All right, sorry it took longer for this update, but I've been working a lot, and I haven't felt much like writing at ALL these last few days... Also, I'm not for sure if this chapter is good... Hope you guys enjoy it all the same, and I'm sorry if it sucks, haha. The first counesling session! Whoot! Haha. XP


"Hush, Potter"
Chapter Nine
by
Kyla

As the time for classes to end drew closer, Harry grew less bored and more anxious, restless. He was dreading his first counseling session with Severus. He did not even see why he needed counseling of any sort. The only thing he would think he would need counseling on is about having Voldemort trying to kill him every year. He had so many near-death experiences that it was surprising he was even still sane. There was not anywhere else for Harry to go, however, so he was forced to sit in the Hospital Wing all afternoon, silently dreading that night.

Meanwhile, Severus had just dismissed his last class of the day. During that last class, he had been pondering over what exactly he would want to go over with Harry. Severus did not know where he could even begin to start with Harry. Maybe he should talk about other things and then lead up to the rape, or if they should leap headfirst into that particular memory. On his way out of his classroom, he decided a pensieve would be a good idea, but maybe that one should be saved for another session.

Severus stopped by the kitchens on his way to the Hospital Wing. The house elves were only to happy to give the Potions Master a giant platter with tons of food on it, as well as two goblets and a pitcher of pumpkin juice. Severus waved his wand, enchanting the platter to float along behind him as he left the kitchens. He scowled at strangling students that dared to dawdle in his way.

"Potter," Severus said in greeting as he pulled the curtains aside to let the platter drift by before stepping over to the bed himself and letting the curtains flutter closed again. He gave an inward sigh when he saw that he had startled Harry and that the boy looked very anxious, and they hadn't even started the counseling session yet. Severus had a feeling this would be a tough session to get through, but he took a deep breath and made sure he was ready while he lowered the platter onto the nightstand beside Harry's bed.

"Here's dinner. Help yourself," Severus said dismissively as he poured himself some pumpkin juice. He knew that Harry would not take to Severus helping him. The boy would insist to be left alone, so Severus decided to stay a step back from trying to help him too much. He would know if he needed to step in.

Harry eyed Severus wearily but reached out for a plate. He slowly put some food on his plate, eyes shooting to Severus every now and then cautiously. "Um... thanks," the Gryffindor said uncomfortably as he sat back in his bed and started munching on the food.

"You're welcome," Severus replied smoothly and sipped his juice. He noted that the boy was very tense, so the Potions Master decided that he would have to get Harry to relax some before they started in on anything major, like the rape. "Calm down, Potter," he sighed, "tell me how your day was," he suggested and made himself a plate of food.

"Boring," Harry answered in a murmur, "lonely... It sucked." A short answer, but Harry was still not sure about talking to Severus, of all people, about anything in his life. It was just that, his life, and he did not feel the need to share anything about it with Severus.

Severus grew slightly irritated at the short response he had received from the Gryffindor, and he tossed around for something else that he could ask Harry, anything to get him talking a little bit. "All right... Why don't you tell me what your favorite class is?" he asked.

"Defense Against the Dark Arts," Harry responded. When Severus asked him why, he sighed and said, "Because it's something I'm good at, and that class could possibly keep me alive for another few years."

"Something you're good at," Severus scoffed, "surely that is not the only thing you're good at. Have you forgotten that you are the Gryffindor Seeker?" He watched carefully for Harry's reaction.

"Well, yeah, I am," Harry admitted anxiously, "but I'm not book smart like Hermione, and I'm not good at chess like Ron, and I stink at Potions..." He rattled off a few more things, but Severus stopped him with a quick wave of his hand.

"So what, Potter?" Severus asked with a small sigh, "You do not have to be good at everything and have skills that other people have. So what if Granger is book smart and if Weasley can outsmart you at chess? I do, however, agree with that bit about Potions," he added thoughtfully, "but it is only from a lack of trying. If you would really apply yourself then I'm fairly certain you would not be flunking my class at the moment."

"No," Harry snapped, getting angry at Severus, "I'm failing your class because you hate me and always find something wrong with my potion then banish it. You won't even give me a real chance! Why bother even trying to brew potions anymore when you'll just walk by and banish it away without even letting me try to fix it?!" By the time he fell silent again, his fists were clenched on the plate he held, and his eyes were a smoldering emerald color.

Severus's own dark eyes narrowed at the boy. "Perhaps, if you paid attention in my class, you would be able to comprehend the material and actually be able to brew a potion without Granger whispering in your ear the whole time," he stated and took a sip of juice.

Harry exploded and threw his plate to the side, letting it fall to the floor and shatter, food going every which way. "I do not have to deal with this," Harry exclaimed and yanked the sheets off of him, "I'm leaving, and you had better not bother following me!" He stood up and made a ran for the curtains.

Severus had seen this coming, however, from the moment Harry had begun to get angry. So he was prepared. He gracefully set his plate aside and stood right in Harry's path. "Potter, get back in that bed right now," he demanded sternly.

Harry glared at him, reluctantly coming to a stop a foot away from Severus. "No! I'm not going to sit here and let you belittle me! I have to deal with it in class, I am not dealing with it now, too! Not while I'm in the Hospital Wing and not after I have all ready had such a bad week! Either you go away, or I'm leaving," he replied scathingly.

"Calm down, Potter," Severus sighed heavily and put his hands up in defeat. "If I go, will you get back into bed and calm down?" he asked, his voice telling the boy that there really was no other option for him. Perhaps he could return in a few minutes, once Harry was calm again. "I just wanted to get you talking about something because you were tense."

"Well, look at the fantastic job you did," Harry seethed. He started back to his bed, however, and laid back down, glaring carefully at Severus as he returned to bed.

"No need to be so rude, Potter," Severus snarled but backed away slowly towards the curtains. "You are to sit here and calm down. I will return in a few minutes, and I expect an apology."

"Not likely," Severus heard Harry snort as he swiftly pulled the curtains back enough to let him out. Severus hurried outside into the hallway and slid into an unused classroom. He sighed and slumped against the wall. "Why must he be so difficult?" he muttered and sat down on one of the desks, pondering over what his next move would be. "All right, so stay away from Potions if at all possible... Perhaps I can get him talking about Quidditch?" He sighed again, "I'll think of something, I suppose..."

"What was all that screaming about?" Madam Pomfrey asked Harry while Severus was thinking about what to do next. She had heard the screaming and the arguing and decided to come see what was going on.

"Nothing," Harry murmured, not wanting to tell Madam Pomfrey about arguing with Severus when the Potions Master was trying to counsel him.

"Really?" Madam Pomfrey asked, "Because it seemed like you and Professor Snape were arguing." At the guilty look on Harry's face, she sighed and tapped her wand on his head once in order to get a quick reading on how his physical recovery was going. "You know that Professor Snape is only trying to help you, right?" she inquired casually.

"Could have fooled me," Harry grumbled angrily, eyes narrowed at the curtains. "He hates me. He always treats me like I'm dirt and insults me..."

Madam Pomfrey looked around, as if to see if there was anyone close by. Upon seeing no one nearby, she murmured, "These are dangerous times, Mr. Potter... Severus cannot be relaxed and kind. His heart has grown cold over the years, and showing feelings are not his strong suit... Just give him a chance, and I'm sure he can help you... Will you try to listen to him? For me?" she asked.

Harry made the mistake of meeting her gaze, and when he saw her face, he gave in. "Fine," he sighed, "but I'm not bearing my soul to the greasy git," he scowled at the sheets on his bed.

Madam Pomfrey giggled and said, "Don't worry, Mr. Potter, no one said you had to do that."

It was then that Severus returned. "Are you through with your little temper tantrum now, Potter?" he asked, sounding annoyed but trying to be calm. He perched himself in his same chair and returned to eating his supper, not looking at Harry. He nodded to Madam Pomfrey in greeting as she made to leave the two alone again.

Harry shifted uncomfortably in his bed. He tried to think of what to say, but nothing came to mind. Instead, the Gryffindor merely settled for remaining silent. He kept his gaze focused on his sheet-covered feet, munching moodily on his food.

Severus was becoming uncomfortable himself. He had thought Harry would try to start up another fight as soon as he returned. He was actually hoping to be dealing with a talkative, though angry, boy, but Harry was keeping quiet, refusing to break the tense silence that had settled over them. "Potter," Severus sighed, and when he saw the Gryffindor wince as a sign that he had heard his professor, he said, "relax."

Harry nodded stiffly and willed his body to relax. However, his muscles remained tense, refusing to even think about relaxing. Every one of Harry's instincts told him not to loosen up. He tried harder though to relax, but nothing was helping. He was beginning to panic, wondering what Severus would do to him if he did not relax, but that only made him even more tense, so now he was fidgeting restlessly, eyes darting here and there anxiously.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Potter," Severus sighed in annoyance. "What will it take to make you calm down and relax?" he asked, eyed narrowed as he watched Harry closely.

Harry squirmed in his bed, not wanting to say anything. "I don't know," he settled for replying in a mumble, "I just... I can't... it's..."

"What's wrong?" Severus asked, eyes softening slightly. Something was bothering Harry, but he couldn't think of anyway to get Harry to calm down. "Just hush, Potter," he said softly, "take a deep breath."

Harry did as told and took a gulp of air. He held it as Severus advised, and his body relaxed as he sighed the air back out slowly. He did it several more times and finally slumped back into his bed with a relaxed yawn. Harry had been kind of annoyed when Severus kept telling him to take deep breaths. He had almost told the Potions Master off once or twice, but he hoped that what Severus was doing would help him to relax in the end, which it did. "Thanks," he muttered, "and.. I'm.. sorry," he added under his breath, avoiding looking at his Potions professor.

"You're welcome, Potter," Severus replied in kind, "and what are you apologizing for, exactly?" He knew what Harry was apologizing for, but he was hoping to get Harry talking.

"You know what I'm apologizing for," Harry mumbled, scowling at Severus, "so why do you ask?" At the shrug of indifference he received he sighed and said, "For my temper earlier... sir," he added respectfully, but grudgingly.

Severus nodded, a smirk on his face. "You're forgiven," he stated, and then a tense silence settled over them. Neither really knew what to say, but Severus had not gotten Harry talking about himself all that much. That was what he was wanting, but it looked like he couldn't dance around and hope Harry would get the hint. "So, Potter," Severus began, "tell me some about yourself." At the uncomfortable look on Harry's face, the Potions Master sighed and suggested instead, "All right, tell me what you do doing your summer holidays."

Harry frowned thoughtfully. That seemed like a fair enough question. He would just have to lie a bit about his aunt and uncle's neglect, but that was okay because he thought that Severus would probably just scoff and say that the spoiled Harry Potter was making it up to get pity. He then realized that Severus was awaiting an answer, looking as though he was about to ask another question in hopes of being answered, but Harry answered the question about his summer holidays. "I usually do chores. When I'm not doing my chores, I like to go to the park near my house or just wander around the streets..."

Severus's dark eyes narrowed. He could detect a lie a mile away. He knew when a student was lying, and though Harry didn't seem to be outright lying about what he did, he was definitely leaving something out, something that Severus felt was very important, if only he knew what that was. "Is that all?" he asked, "What about your family? Do you go on vacation a lot? What kinds of things do you do with your relatives, Potter?"

"I'm sorry, sir," Harry snapped, not sounding too sorry, "but I don't see how that is any of your business... You told me to tell you what I do over my summer holidays, and if I choose to not tell you part of what I do—that includes what I do with my relatives—then you can't make me say anything more than I want to." His shoulders stiffened, as if he was preparing himself for a sound scolding, but Severus just smirked.

"Oh really, Potter," Severus hummed, "very well then. I shall let you choose the next topic of discussion." He fell silent and sipped some pumpkin juice into his mouth in a dignified movement of his arm. He set it down on the nightstand and asked, "Well? What will it be, Potter? Anything in particular that you would like to talk about?"

"Not really," Harry muttered and looked away from his Potions professor. "I.. I just wish that.. oh, never mind," he sighed.

"What?" Severus asked, and when Harry made no move to answer him, he asked again, "What, Potter? You wish that.. what?" He scowled in annoyance at being ignored and snarled, "Potter! Answer me this second, you brat!"

"It's not important," Harry grumbled and refused to meet his teacher's angry gaze.

"I don't care if it's not important," Severus snapped, "You started to say something, now finish it." He glared at his Gryffindor student.

"Fine, you want to know? You really want to know?" Harry snarled, eyes flashing dangerously as he focused his furious scowl on his professor. "I wish that I never had to go back to Privet Drive! I wish that I never had to see my uncle, aunt, and cousin ever, ever again! I wish someone knew, that someone cared! That's what I want," he bellowed, angry tears racing down his cheeks. He gave a choked sob and hugged his knees tightly, burying his face behind his knees to hide his tears.

"What are you talking about, Potter?" Severus asked with a frown. Something was definitely not right, and it apparently had something to do with Harry's relatives. But what could it be? What would make Harry not want to go back there? Many students waited impatiently for summer holidays so that they could go back to their families.

Harry, however, could only get a few words out, and they were all indistinguishable. He cried and mumbled incoherently, trying to smack away Severus's arms when the Potions Master attempted to calm the boy down. "Leave me... a-alone," he croaked and fought against Severus.

Severus did not like how Harry was thrashing around at him, but he endured it. He would be fine, but he could not say the same for Harry if he could not get the boy to calm down. "Hush, Potter," he said gently, "hush... it's okay." Severus was seeing deja vu at the moment. It seemed like he was doing this an awful lot, but he couldn't really find it in him to resent Harry for it. It wasn't the boy's fault. He was distraught, but Severus had never noticed that Harry seemed so unstable, or maybe he had just recently became that way after the rape. Severus wasn't sure, but whatever the reason, he sighed and continued to rock Harry slightly, waiting on the boy to wear himself out.

When Harry had cried himself out, Severus settled the boy back onto his bed and lifted the sheets up to the Gryffindor's shoulders. "I think that will be it for this session, Potter," he muttered tenderly and ran his hands through the boy's raven locks once to pull the hair from the boy's face. "Just relax and get some rest," he murmured before swishing his wand over the platter so that it rose into the air and floated after the Potions Master as he slipped silently out of the Hospital Wing, leaving a tired Harry to fall asleep in his bed in the Hospital Wing.

(( To be continued... ))


Kyla: Okay, well, just review if you wanna... I think I'm going to go to sleep now.. I'm exhausted! Haha. xP