Warnings: Panic attack, curse word (just one; the one for crap) , and bad thoughts; see the bold WITH UNDERLINE to see where the panic attack starts. You don't have to read it if you don't want to. Enjoy!
Ezra jumps a little when the door is opened again, his thoughts fleeing as the woman enters. Ezra wants to feel afraid, but the woman does not seem like she is going to hurt him and has, what Ezra believes, a 'motherly aura'. As if he would know what that is. As she sits across from him, she makes sure not to make any sudden movements that might scare the child.
"Hi. My name is Hera. Yours is Ezra, right?" Ezra nods, not looking at her. "We're going to take care of this, alright? They'll get to at least 5 years in prison, so you'll never going to have to see them again because you'll be able to leave. It'll be very unlikely they will be allowed out under five years. How's that." Ezra nods and Hera sighs at the lack of emotions the kid has.
"We won't question you anymore today, but you will be coming home with Kanan and me until you are able to talk for yourself." Ezra scoffs, crossing his arms. Hera frowns. "We're going to help you, Ezra, whether you like it or not. You'll get a voice back, but which kind? It is up to you."
Ezra looks at her confused. Which kind of voice I'll get back? What does that mean? He thinks. But before he could get very far, the male police officer, Jarrus, as it says on his badge, opens the door. Ezra stares at him as he speaks.
"Time to go. I have permission from Ahsoka." Hera nods. She looks towards Ezra who had gone back to looking down at his hands and peeling away dead skin from the calluses he has.
"Ezra, would you like to come with us." Ezra shrugs. Hera sighs and stands up. She walks towards Kanan and smiles when she hears a chair scratch against the floor. As the three walk towards the running car, Chopper barks at the three. Hera rolls her eyes at him, but Ezra smiles, walking right towards Chopper. He immediately quiets down and almost smiles when Ezra starts petting him. Hera walks over to the door and opens the door for Ezra, keeping Chopper from jumping out of the car, and closes the door. As she gets in the car, she looks back at Ezra and says,
"Seatbelt?" Ezra nods and she smiles. She puts the car in reverse.
"I wish you could do that," Kanan says to Hera, earning a side glance as she pulls out of the police station. Kanan looks out the window, pouting almost.
"Why don't you learn how to do it?" Hera asks, glancing over at Kanan.
"He doesn't like me!" Kanan exclaims, moving his hands about for exaggeration. The motion earns a growl from Chopper, whose head was on Ezra's lap, being lightly petted as the child looks out the window, and Kanan immediately puts his hands in his lap. Hera smiles at the frustrated look on Kanan's face and begins to pull into the driveway.
"Alright, we're home!" She smiles, looking back at Ezra. She frowns as she sees a faraway look in his eyes. "Ezra?" She asks, gaining the boy's attention, raising his eyebrows in question.
"We're home." She begins to get out of the car, along with Kanan. Unknowing to them, Ezra had mouthed the word home in confusion.
"You coming?" Hera asks, sticking her head in the car. Ezra nods and unfastens the seatbelt and exits the open car door, courtesy of Hera, and Chopper follows closely on his heels. As he walks up to the door, the memories of him getting kicked out flash in his mind, but he keeps a straight face. Chopper nudges at his hand, panting, and Ezra smiles. As the two walks into the house, Ezra can already hear Zeb and Kanan arguing. Before he could get too close, the voices muffled through a closed off room, Hera asks him if he wanted to see his room.
"And you'll have to share it with Zeb." She finishes. With her back to the boy, she doesn't see the quick flash of fear in his eyes.
As the two walks up the stairs, Chopper still on Ezra's heels, he catches a glimpse of the family room and kitchen in full, seeing almost how homey and cozy it looked. He shakes his head.
I won't be here for long. I shouldn't think like that. The minute they get the paperwork finished, I'm going back into the system.
"And this is Zeb's room, which you will be sharing with him," Hera says, opening a brown door with the words DO NOT DISTURB on it. "Kanan and I are across from you, Sabine's is the one to the right of ours, and the bathroom is to the left of Zeb's and your's room," Hera says, pointing at each door. While Zeb's room had the sign on it, Sabine's was very colorful, splatters of paint all over it, the words KNOCK on the door. Kanan' and Hera's door was just white, but it had a whiteboard on it, the marker next to it, and little things like
we need milk or I have an art gallery thing this weekend at 8 and even Chopper has a vet visit this Sunday was written on the small space. But it had no meaning to Ezra. He just looked at the words in confusion.
"Come on, I think you need a shower." Ezra nods, seeing as he hasn't showered in months. Even the last time he came here, he didn't remember to take one. Hera grabs a dark blue towel and a dark blue washcloth from the closet within the hallway and leads Ezra to the bathroom. She places the towels on the counter, the thing taking up most of the bathroom, holding two sinks, and turns on the water, making sure it isn't too hot for the boy.
"The green bottle is the shampoo, the blue one is conditioner, and the clear one is body soap." Ezra nods and she smiles. "When you get unchanged, throw your clothes outside so I can wash them, yeah?" Ezra thinks for a minute but then nods. Hera walks out of the bathroom, leaving Ezra there with the running water. Undressing, he tosses the near-brown cloths outside the door, a little bit of dirt coming off of them, and he steps into the shower, closing the dark purple curtain behind him. His muscles almost instantly relax from the hot water as a stream of light brown washes down his back and into the drain as the water beats against his head. Just washing with water, he gets off as much dirt and such that he can before grabbing the washcloth and adding just a little too much body soap. A strong smell of apple-cinnamon fills the room and Ezra sighs, smiling. The smell nearly matched the season, as it was November now, and Ezra thinks about how Thanksgiving was going to be spent, once again, on the streets.
As he finishes washing his body, he grabs the shampoo, giving himself a generous amount of the cotton-smelling gel, and scrubs his head, making sure to get every strand of hair clean. Washing it out, a good amount of dirt and such coming off his head, he puts just about the same amount of the similar smelling conditioner in his hand and adds it to his hair, letting it sit there for a little bit longer, not washing it out immediately. After washing out the conditioner, and making sure he washed his face with the bar of soap, which reminded him of the face soap she had in the shower when he was allowed to use it, he cleans his face, making sure to get behind his ears.
It was the first time in a while Ezra had felt both calm, relaxed, and clean at the same time.
Turning the shower off and opening the door, a cloud of steam coming out of the shower, he grabs the towel and dries himself off. A sudden wave of panic comes.
Wait, what am I supposed to wear? Looking to his left where the counter was, he sees a pair of boxers, a shirt, and some sweatpants folded and placed next to his towel.
Hera must have placed these in here with the towels. Or she came in here while I took a shower without me hearing her. He mused. As he puts on the clothes, even though they were a little bit too big, he couldn't really complain. And they weren't too big.
Walking out of the bathroom, the steam finally escaping the small space, he walks back to the room where he and Zeb shared. Internally groaning, he opens the door to see Chopper napping on his bed. Whistling, and gaining the dog's attention so he didn't scare him. Raising his head, Chopper begins to wag his tail. Ezra smilies and walks over to the bed, it being large enough for Chopper, him, and at least one more person, he climbs in and sits with his back the wall while Chopper's head is in his lap.
Looking out the small window in the room, he wonders how long it will take for him to get kicked out. Obviously, he can't talk back. But if he does something wrong...
His thoughts are interrupted by knocking at the door. Chopper raises his head, growling a little as the door opens, but he jumps from Ezra's lap and happily runs over to Hera.
"Hey, Ezra. We're about to eat dinner. Would you like to?" Ezra shrugs and gets off the bed, walking towards Hera. "Do you have any allergies, Ezra?" Ezra thinks for a minute, then nods. "Crap," Hera mumbles, almost too low for Ezra to hear. "Could you show me what it is?" Ezra nods and Hera sighs in relief. She motions for him to follow her and the two walk towards the kitchen. Hera grabs a small notepad and a pencil and hands it to Ezra.
"I know you can't write, but can you draw?" Ezra nods. Stomach lowly growling, he starts to draw an oval with a triangle attached to it on one side. Hera nods in understanding. "Fish. You're allergic to fish." Ezra shakes his head. Hera looks at him in confusion. He begins to draw a crescent moon with antennas and a circle with swirls in it and a narrow oval coming out from one side.
"Oh, you're allergic to seafood in general." Ezra nods. "Alright, I'll make sure not to make any from now on."
Wait, just because I'm allergic to it, it doesn't mean you can't eat it! Ezra immediately feels bad, but he can't tell them otherwise.
"Go sit at the table, I'll be there in a minute." Ezra nods and walks over to the large table, sitting down at an empty chair. As he waits, he bounces his leg subconsciously as he rubs the inside of his left palm with his right thumb.
"You don't have to be so nervous, kid. Zeb won't bite your head off." Ezra's head shoots up at the voice, looking towards a girl with sea blue hair and aqua tips. "I don't think I've properly introduced myself. Him either," She says, pointing her thumb towards a tall, buff man entering the area with grey hair with dark purple tips. He looks at the two, confused. Sabine pulls the boy's attention away, not noticing how his leg stopped moving as it froze.
"My name is Sabine Syndulla. My last name was originally Wren." Ezra raises his eyebrows in surprise. She laughs. "I'll take that as you've heard of them?" Ezra nods.
~+~+~ FYRP BLIP~+~+~
The Wrens were some of the top crime lords in the Galatic. The Wrens, along with other Mandolorian crime groups, were not just the only ones. There are the Imperials, the Hutts, the Bounty Hunters, you name it. The Wrens were in the top 5 crime groups. There are only so many. If you aren't in the top 5, then the police screw with you. When you are in the top 5, they don't even try because they know they'll end up embarrassing themselves. The top 5 were
1. The Imperials
2. The Hutts
3. The Wrens
4. The Ghosts
5. The Bounty Hunters
'The Ghosts' is a group who gained their name from the people of Lothal, where most of their crime is. Well, crime isn't the word most people will use. More like True Neutral or Chaotic Good. They help those who are being robbed from, attacked, whether or not it's by the police or another crime group. They move to stealthily that nobody can even get a glimpse at them, so they can't ever try to ask them who they are. So, the civilians gave them their name. They don't seem to mind it, not coming out about not liking it, and sometimes even using it in their attacks. Although they help people, they take little things, things people barely miss, when they help people. So, if someone was being robbed for money and they saved them, they would probably take a five or ten from the wallet. If there was a lot of money, they would take a twenty, but it was rare. If it was a not-so-rich person, they would take a five, a one, or nothing at all.
Other crime groups aren't exactly crime groups, but they aren't doing bad, so they aren't hunted by the police. If anything, they help the police. They go against the crime groups 1-5, except nobody messes with #4. These groups include:
1. The Rebel Alliance
2. The Smugglers
3. The Mandalore Resistance
4. (Galatic) Republic -(Galactic is the "world" or "earth". Lothal is a state. Capital city is a city, etc.)
5. Guardians
You get the gist of it. Each crime group has an opposing side: Imperial-Rebel; Hutts-Smugglers; Wrens-Mandalore Resistance; Ghosts-(Technically) (Galatic) Republic (due to the fact they are chaotic good in their eyes); and Bounty Hunters-Guardians.
*More FYRP BLIP Coming Soon! Now, back to our regularly scheduled reading!*
Ezra turns his head to where Hera comes out of the kitchen with Kanan not too far behind, carrying a tray of delicious smelling food. Ezra takes a deep breath, his mouth beginning to drool, as a memory flashes through his head. He swallows. Suddenly, he doesn't quite want to eat anymore.
As Hera sets down a plate in front of him, Ezra looks at the multiple foods on the plate.
"It's meatloaf night," Hera says, smiling. She sets down a plate at an empty spot, most likely hers, and Zeb comes in with two plates, and so does Kanan. Kanan sets one down in front of Sabine, she says thank you, and Zeb sets down two plates in front of himself. When they're all seated, everybody begins to eat.
Ezra just pokes at it.
Realizing that Ezra wasn't eating, Hera doesn't try to get him to eat. She just starts to eat slower, and Kanan, realizing this, eats slower. When both Zeb and Sabine finished their plates, Ezra finding out that Zeb eats two plates worth in the same time someone could eat one, both go to the kitchen to clean their plates before going to the family room.
"You know," Hera says, still eating her food. "It's movie night. And since it's your first time, we decided to let you pick the movie." Ezra shrugs and continues to poke at his food even though his stomach wants him to take a big bite of the, now cold, meatloaf and/or mashed potatoes. "Do you think you could at least take a small bite of the food?" Ezra shakes his head. Hera sighs, relenting. "Well, at least you drank." Hera stands up, her food now gone, and takes Ezra's plate and an empty cup. He tries to stand up to do it himself, always doing the dishes at his old...home, but Hera reaches above her head, putting it out of his reach, smiling.
"Nope. Go pick a movie, Ezra," She says, walking out and into the kitchen. Ezra sighs.
*Panic attack warning. See next bold WITH UNDERLINE to skip over this.*
"You can't really ever argue with her," Kanan says, smiling at the frustrated boy. He starts walking the same way Zeb and Sabine did. "Come on, let's go pick out a movie." Kanan nods his head towards where Sabine and Zeb went and Ezra shrugs. Suddenly, Kanan puts a hand on Ezra's shoulder. Flinching, Ezra shrugs his hand off. Giving him a weird look, Kanan doesn't do it again and lets his hand fall at his side and Ezra can't breathe as they reach the family room.
Shit, not right now. Please, not right now.
Trying his best to keep his hands from shaking, he tries asking Kanan where the bathroom is. Much to his relief, Kanan figured it out on the first try of charades.
"Down the hall, first door on your right," he says, pointing to the hallway to the right of the tv. Ezra nods and quickly shuffles towards the bathroom. Closing the door, he lets out a shaky breath of both relief and panic. Pacing the small space of the bathroom, he rubs his shaking hands up and down his face. Holding back sobs and tears flow down his face, the bathroom becomes a blur and he can't breathe. Stumbles towards the sink, he Leans over it with his head in his hands, he tries to calm himself down.
Why must I do this? What's wrong? What's wrong? What's wrong with me? What's wrong. Caught up in his thoughts, he doesn't hear the knocking at the door.
YOu ShOUlN'T Be HeRE
NO!
Ezra's vision started to become distorted as if he was looking through a non-see though glass screen. Looking up in the mirror, he can only focus on his reflexion as he sees his own lips move.
YoU'RE WoRhLeSS
NO
YoU Don'T DeSErVe ThIS
no. make it stop. make it stop.
Ezra flinches away from the door as it swings open and a worried Hera stands in front of an equally worried Kanan. Ezra sees her mouth move, but no words come out. Shaking as he backups, Ezra keeps a trained eye on the woman. Hera tries to put her hands out to comfort the boy, but he sobs as he pushes them away, slapping her on the hands. She pulls them back as Ezra realizes what he has done and starts to cry more. His hands shake as they reach up to his head as he runs them through his hair, but he can't feel them.
I can't stop. I can't stop. I can't feel my hands. I can't feel my arms. I can't I can't I can't.
"Ezra, I know you're scared," Hera tries to say, even though she knows the kid can't hear her. "But we're here, Ezra. It's okay. You're okay. You're safe." She watches as the boy falls down between the shower and the toilet, hiding as he continues to shake. Trying not to cry herself, Hera sits down near the door and tells Kanan to bring them some water. She was going to stay here until he could stop. She was going to wait.
OK, SO THIS WILL BE IN 2 PARTS. YEAH. OK BYE. and for those of you who skipped over the attack, it's fine. You didn't have to read it. :)
3 ANGEL
P.S.
If you ever need to talk, just know my PMs are always open. And please know, you never have to go through something like this alone. 3
