Hi guys, I wanted to post this sooner but my computer doesn't work anymore so I had to write this on my phone and believe me that's not easy. Anyway I hope you'll enjoy this. Please review, really it's not long and I really need to know what you think about this.
Chapter 9: Opportunity
"Ianto : how is it going ?
Jack : I'm trying my best not to jump like a proper fanboy. That's hard ! I have to go, Owen has just arrived. Give Gwen a kiss for me. See you x
Ianto : Ahah Good luck fanboy. Later x"
Ianto smiled as he typed his answere. His relationship with Jack was looking good. Who would have thought that someone would ever managed to make Jack Harkness settle down ? At first, things were a bit difficult but now that Fiona Vanstone's project was getting precise they could plan their lives together. Jack didn't have to be in Los Angeles one day and in Vancouver the other. Being able to spend more and more time together was everything they could have hopped for. Everything they wanted.
Plus, Ianto's career was finally moving, with Gwen's help. After his little performance at Owen's party she had insisted on being his agent. And from that moment Ianto finally realised that maybe he needed help, and that there was nothing wrong in asking for some. He wasn't weak, he was just human and not stupid anymore.
Speaking of Gwen, he had an appointment with her. She had been looking for a few auditions on his behalf. He had to admit that she was a damn good agent. She was persuasive and determinate. Those were necessary qualities for being good at her job and he appreciated that... when she was focused on finding him jobs instead of finding out about his sexual activities with Jack. Ianto was a pretty...private person when it came to his love life. But that wasn't really a good enough excuse for Gwen.
He was getting to like her but there was something that still bothered him. Like the way she looked at Jack... Yes she had a boyfriend and yes Jack was her best friend and gay but, there was something more than simple affection sometimes even worship in her eyes when she was staring at him when she thought no one was looking. And if Ianto didn't know better, and if Jack wasn't gay... maybe things would be different.
No, Ianto wasn't jealous, nor possesive, not at all. But sometimes it was kind of disturbing and a little annoyingwhen someone looked at Jack as if they were gonna jump on him. And that tended to happen a lot. Yes, Jack was handsome and probably the sexiest man he had ever led an eye on but... He was supposed to be his, right ? So that was an absolutely normal reaction when someone was trying to take what was his right ? Okay he was possessive.
But that was a fault he had managed to hide from Jack so far. He wasn't sure the older man would want a possessive crazy boyfriend. If he were in his shoes he wouldn't. So he tried to calm himself down but that was pretty hard, moreover that he couldn't really say that Jack was his boyfriend or partner or whatever. He couldn't say that Jack was his, even if he wanted to shout it out to the world. Because... They had never really discussed coming out as a couple, publicly and officially.
And that was something that frustrated the hell out of him. Because he didn't really know what Jack wanted. If you'd asked him, Ianto would say "yes of course" at the drop of a head but... He wasn't so sure about Jack. Sometimes it would seem like yes, Jack wanted to show him off as his partner but other times, Ianto just felt like he was Jack's dirty little secret. Jack had never confirmed that he wasn't single anymore, and he had had multiple occasions, in interviews or in panels. But he would just make a joke and skip the question. Ianto wasn't sure what he should think of it anymore.
Ianto had just finished eating when he heard a soft but firm knock on his door. He walked down the corridor and opened it without looking in the peephole, already knowing who was there.
"Hi Ianto" Gwen said, hugging him.
"Erm... Hi Gwen" Ianto replied, not really comfortable with her affection. But if she noticed anything, she didn't mention it.
"So ! I have good news" she said smiling, walking in his flat. " A friend of mind is gonna direct a Broadway production and yes before you say it I know you're not looking for an acting part but I saw you at Owen's party and I know you'd be brilliant in a musical. So I called ahead an got the profile she is looking for. You're a perfect match. It's not what you're looking for but it's a start. A good way to make you known over the world and to gain experience. If UK labels don't want you then fuck themselves, it's their loss. But you go ahead and I know that there are intelligent people over the U.S that would see your talent. You're young, talented, and drop dead gorgeous, you're a living money magnet. Of course you'll need training for the acting part and a bit of voice training could be good too even if you already have a great technique. That's why I called one of my contact in the Julliard School and sent him the video from Owen's party and the couple of recording we did. I pulled some strings and he accepted to train you, you'll just have to have a test at the end of the two months course to show him what you've got. If he is satisfied you'll get a recommendation. No stop don't say it ! I know 'you don't want anyone to pull strings for you' but Ianto that's how the world works now. You can't do it on your own and you know it : you've tried. So trust me. Now what do you say ?"
After this hurricane of words Ianto just wondered one thing... How could Gwen say that much, in one breath ?
"Ianto ?" Gwen frowned.
"Erm..."
"Are you okay ? Didn't you understand what I said ? It's amazing ! Great news... Of course I understand it's quite a surprise but..."
"Gwen !" He interrupted her, " slow down please"
"Sorry. So what do you say ?"
"Erm... I ... Whaou" he said as he sit down on the couch
" I know I'm incredible, you can say it !" She said smiling, brushing her hair out of her face.
" No I mean you really do talk quickly!"
" Prat" she laughed, hitting his arm playfully, sitting next to him. " Seriously, what do you think ?"
" I... I can't." He said after a moment of reflexion, getting up and walking to the other side of the room.
" What do you mean you can't ? Of course you can ?"
" Gwen..." He sighed " Broadway, Julliard ? It's in freaking New York for Christ's sake ! "
" If it's about the money you know we can find a way. I mean I can try to find an investor or there is even Jack..." She tried.
"No. Not Jack. Leave him out of it" he cut her off.
" But you know how hard it is to find investment these days, the agency can help out a bit. You know Jack believes in you and it's not like he can't afford this, you know he'd do this for you" she argued walking over to him.
" I said no. I don't want his money ! That's final" he said in a firm and cold voice.
" Okay" she sighed.
" Let me... Let me think about it okay ?" He said hesitantly, rubbing his hand over his face.
"Okay" she said patting his shoulder " I have to go, I left you the papers on the table. Call me when you've made your decision okay ?" She smiled at him.
"Okay. Can you... Not tell Jack about this... For now ? Please."
"Sure. You'll tell him, it's your great news after all"
"Thanks" he smiled " he gives you a kiss by the way"
"Must be my lucky day !" She laughed heading to the door. "Bye Ianto"
"Bye Gwen" he replied to a closed door.
During their meeting, Fiona Vanstone had explained her crazy project to Owen, Tosh and Jack. She was very young to be such a famous writer but she was also very talented. No wonder they were all so excited. After lunch they decided to go back to her house and spent the afternoon and evening there, talking about the future TV show. Gwen had joined them after her meeting with Ianto to finalise the contracts. She had tried to avoid Jack's questions about that said meeting as best as she could but he had noticed that something was up. She couldn't lie to him. He had always seen right through her. However he didn't say anything.
They spent the whole afternoon speaking about the project, signing the contracts at the end of the day. Saying that it had all happened in no time was an understatement. But Owen, Tosh and Jack just couldn't let this opportunity of working with such a good writer flying over their heads because of paperwork. As soon as the ink was dry, Gwen left, saying she had tonnes of work to do. The others stayed and settled in Fiona's lounge with a couple of drinks.
"Now now, I think that's enough of business talk" Fiona smiled. What can you tell me about yourself ? At work we'll have to remain professional but I have no shame in saying that I'm a huge fan of all of you. A bit of a fangirl you know, wants to know everything" she chuckled.
"Oh please don't let Gwen know that or she'll take a great pleasure in telling you all our dirty little secrets" Jack laughed.
"Oh because you have dirty little secrets ?" Fiona replied with a wicked smile.
"Well maybe, would you want me to have some ?" Jack replied changing into his most flirting behaviour.
"Jack !" Owen growled.
"What ? Jealous, honey ? " Jack asked.
"Don't worry Owen there is plenty for both of you" Fiona winked.
"Oh girl I love you already" Jack laughed leaning over the table to give Fiona a high-five.
" Jack do I need to remind you that you're... Taken and gay by the way ?" Tosh stepped in.
"Oh I've been taken alright I can tell you that I remember that well enough."
"Jack !" This time everyone whined.
"You're... You have a partner !" Fiona smiled broadly.
"Well done Tosh now she sounds like a crazy fangirl" Owen chuckled. They laughed.
"Er... Yeah... Nothing is official... I mean as in "publicly official", with the press but... Yeah, we're kind of serious" Jack smiled a sweet smile thinking about Ianto waiting for him at the Welshman's flat. " I'd like to keep it that way for now."
"Yeah no worries but... Whaou Jack Harkness settling down" Fiona replied.
"Yeah" Jack blushed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
" I mean you're a nice bloke, obviously.. But you do have a reputation" she smiled, apologising.
"Don't apologise, he likes to behave like a victim but it's his own fault after all. But let's just say that he is now growing up" Owen interfered.
"Oi!" Jack wailed "Plus you're the one to talk ? At least I pulled my head out of my arse, I don't think you can say so" he replied sending Owen a look. The other actor looked down, knowing all too well what he was talking about.
"Jack ! You are a flirt" Tosh interfered, saving Owen on this one.
"Yes but you know it's all an act. A playful banter. Meaningless flirting. It doesn't really matter." Jack smiled.
"Well remember to tell Ianto that" Tosh sighed.
"Hum, Ianto... A Welshman uh ? You do know what's good for you" Fiona winked.
"You have no idea" he winked back " but enough of me now" he said putting his hands up to stop them from saying more.
"Must be a first that Jack Harkness doesn't want people to talk about him" Owen laughed.
" Oi ! What is it today ? Pick up on Jack day ?" Jack wailed.
"We do have to lower your ego sometimes" Tosh smiled softly.
Jack sighed sliding lower in his seat, pouting. The others bursted out laughing.
"You should do it you know" Marc said, taking a mouthful of fries.
"I don't think I can" Ianto said staring at the folder he was holding.
"That Gwen, she said you could do it. And I know you can so why not ?"
Marc and Ianto were at The Stopwatch sharing a meal, the classic fish and chips. Just an hour ago Jack had sent Ianto a text saying that he'd stay for diner at Fiona's house. So Ianto had called Marc thinking that maybe his friend would either distract him or help him make his decision. He wasn't sure he could do it. Yes, it was everything he had hoped for, a chance to prove that he could be a singer but... Now everything was different.
"Marc, it's a Broadway production, not random singing in cheap bars" Ianto sighed in frustration.
"That's why you need some training, that's why Gwen wants you to do that school thing."
Ianto said nothing, focusing on the task at hands, which was eating his food. It wasn't worth it anyway. He would fail so why bother ? The school lessons were expensive, too expensive. He wasn't sure he could afford it and no way he was gonna ask Jack money. He was his boyfriend not his...sugar daddy. Risks were too high anyway. Maybe he should have stayed in University. At least he would have had a real job in the end. His father was right after all. He was just...
"Stop it" Marc's strong voice cut off his current trail of thoughts.
"What ?" Ianto asked, confused, looking at his best friend.
"Stop doing this. You're doubting yourself again."
"Am not" Ianto replied petulantly, looking down once again.
"Sure you are ! You have that look on your face."
"What look ?"
"The look that says 'I'm not worth it, why do I bother ? My father was right'. But you know what ? You are worth it. You're gonna do it, and you're gonna be brilliant because your father is an arse hole who can't see what's in front of him. And you're gonna shut him up for good !" Marc said firmly with a passionate tone.
He was kind of getting tired of Ianto's lack of confidence. He was a great guy and so bloody talented. If he was doubting himself it was all because of his father. That freaking bastard had crushed Ianto and physical abuse hadn't even been necessary. His words had cut Ianto as deep as knives would have. His father had never once laid a hand on Ianto. He hadn't needed to. Knowing that he repealed him had been enough. His reaction after Ianto's coming out had been the last straw. But that was also what had saved Ianto in a sense. After that, he had decided that if his father couldn't accept him for who he was, then he wasn't worth it. He didn't want his father in his life, not the other way around.
Yet Marc knew that his relationship with his father still mattered to Ianto. And whether he wanted it or not, his opinion would always be important for him, even if it still hurt him badly.
"It's not that" Ianto said not completely lying.
"Then what is it ?" Snapped Marc.
Silence.
"Come on what is it Ianto ?" Marc said in a softer voice as if he was trying to coax a small child.
Silence.
"It is about Jack, isn't it ?" He finally asked, connecting A and B together.
That, at least, got Ianto's attention but he didn't reply anyway.
"You can't sacrifice your career for him, Ianto" Marc sighed.
"I don't !"
"Yes you do. He has his own life Ianto. You have to accept that. He can fly around the Earth, shooting and flirting with every single actor in the world while you wait for him, hoping that he'll always come back to you"
"You make me sound like a pathetic idiot" Ianto cried out.
"Maybe because you're acting like one !"
"It's not like that... Me and Jack !" Ianto snapped getting up.
"Then what is it like then ? If not like you, wasting what could be the only chance for your career !" Marc snapped back.
"You don't understand" Ianto growled before leaving the pub.
"Then make me ! Make me understand why all of a sudden he is worth losing what you've worked so hard for, for years !" Marc replied, running after him.
Ianto said nothing, just stared at him, a strange sparkle in his eyes.
"You love him don't you ?" Marc sighed. "Christ Ianto you can't keep making those mistakes again and again" he continued rubbing his forehead.
"What if I did ?! Why would it be a mistake ?!" Ianto replied angrily.
"Loving him isn't a mistake don't misunderstand me. You know I like him, I think he is a good bloke. But living in his shadow and scarifying yourself is."
"I'm not living in his shadow not sacrifying myself for him okay ?! So leave it !" Ianto said, turning his back to his best friend, leaving without another word.
Marc sighed in frustration... He fucked up.
After his confrontation with Marc, Ianto had come back to his flat, angry and more insecure than ever. He had grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels and drunk to settle his anger.
He didn't know what to do. He couldn't decide and Marc's words kept playing in his head again and again. What if he was right ?
What if he was scarifying an amazing opportunity for Jack ?
But the other man had also chose not to take some work so he could spend time with him, after all. But it wasn't really the same, was it ? Jack was on top of the World and he was nothing.
Sometimes Ianto did wonder why Jack had taken such an interest in him. He was nothing special and couldn't even find himself a decent work. He was ... Pathetic that was the word. He couldn't even take his own decisions.
Alcohol was beginning to affect his body and his mind was burying itself in a dark and dangerous loop he knew too well.
Jack. Jack Harkness. The Captain as the media nicknamed him after his most serious role in a movie about the Second World War.
That dawn man was everything Ianto had. The only thing that was his and only his. He was supposed to be happy, even grateful. But he wasn't.
He wasn't his boyfriend, or his partner, he was just the lost puppy that followed him, begging for a bit of affection.
"Pathetic." Ianto whispered angrily.
He kept on drinking for a while until he heard someone giggling outside his flat. He walk to the door and opened it when he also heard keys missing the lock. As soon as he pulled it opened, a surprised Jack fell in his arms.
"Oops ?" Jack giggled.
" Jack are you drunk ?" Ianto asked in a cold voice.
"No sir" Jack replied with a small voice and a terrified look on his face. His eyes sparkled with a wicked gleam though.
"Great" Ianto muttered. He sighed, closed the door and dragged Jack through his loft, dropping him on his bed.
"Come on, I'm not that drunk Ianto, I'm just messing around" Jack laughed grabbing his wrist before he could flee and pulled him on the bed beside him.
"Haha" Ianto faked a laugh.
Jack frowned at Ianto obviously in a bad mood. He noticed the bottle of whiskey on the coffee table.
"Apparently I wasn't the only one celebrating" Jack said pointing at the bottle.
"And what were you celebrating ?" Ianto asked clearly avoiding the question in Jack's statement.
"We signed the contracts with Fiona ! The show is becoming a reality ! I can't believe it, it's amazing..." Jack explained a broad smile on his face. But Ianto wasn't listening anymore.
He just stared in the air, Marc's words ringing in his head.
"He has his own life Ianto, you have to accept it"
"And you know what's best ?" Jack said, pulling himself on Ianto's lap.
"Huh ?"
"The set is in Cardiff so that means we're gonna be able to see each other every day" Jack continued, trailing his lips down Ianto's throat.
"Living in his shadow is a mistake"
"I could come after work, slip into your warm bed and have my wicked way with you every single night" he added biting on his earlobe.
"While you wait for him hoping that he'll always come back to you"
"Ianto ? What's wrong ?" Jack pulled back, frowning in concern at him.
"Nothing" he replied.
"Oh no don't tell me you're giving me the cold shoulder because of tonight ? Listen, I'm sorry I stayed there without checking if it was alright with you before" Jack said, peppering Ianto's face with soft kisses.
"It's alright"
"You must have been so cold and lonely" Jack said with a baby voice. "I'm sorry sir, so, so sorry" Jack said catching Ianto's bottom lip with his teeth, pulling at it playfully.
Even in such a dark mood he could never resist Jack. He knew he'd lose eventually, so maybe he could play along.
" I am very disappointed Jack." Ianto replied grabbing his arse, both squeezing it and bringing Jack closer to him. Tonight he decided, he wasn't just a lost puppy. He wasn't going to be pathetic anymore.
"I'm sorry Sir, maybe I could find a way to make it up to you..." Jack trailed of, lowering his hand that was on Ianto's shoulder, between the Welshman's legs. He rubbed at his crotch through the fabric of his jeans and Ianto let him, for a moment. Then he stilled his partner's hand.
"Do you really think that this will make up for your behaviour ?" He said with a hard voice.
"No Sir, I know I've been very naughty Sir. I'm sorry."
"Good... You must know you need some punishment."
"Yes Sir, whatever you think is the best Sir" Jack said biting his lower lip.
"Let me up. I have to check something. If you're stark naked when I get back I might reconsider the harshness of your punishment named as sleeping alone on the couch" Ianto smiled and Jack obeyed.
"Oh and Jack" Ianto said turning back to a already half naked Jack " don't even think of starting without me, you'd regret it " he finished with a dangerous smile.
"Wouldn't dream of it, Ianto" Jack replied flopping down on the bed.
Ianto walked to his kitchen counter and picked up his phone. He typed a quick text and send it.
"Okay I'll do it, but please not a word to Jack. I'll tell him later, after all it's my good news right ? I think I still have my mother's money for the lessons.-IJ"
"Ianto hurry up ! " Jack whined from his bed.
"Come on soldier I'm sure you can hold on a bit more." Ianto replied.
"You're missing the show" Jack sighed.
"Okay. Don't worry about the money I found an investor. And no it's not Jack don't worry. And before you ask I can't tell you their name, they wanted to remain anonymous. But don't worry, whoever it is they believe in you and have enough money to finance several entire formations at Julliard. -GC"
"Ianto !"
"Jack don't push me or I'll have to punish you" Ianto replies with a hard voice. However a smile was stretching his lips.
"I'm not sure my loyal soldier is gonna be more obedient after that threat." Jack chuckled.
"Thanks Gwen you are incredible. I'm not sure I'm comfortable with the idea of someone paying for me but I guess I don't have a choice. Good night Gwen. -IJ"
TBC
So what do you think ? Trouble in paradise already ?
By the way I wanted to know if you wanted more... smutty scene ? I think I'll be more comfortable with writing it if you were comfortable with reading it... So let me know with a quick review ;)
