He Was Already Hers Chapter 9

A/N: Yes it's been a long time since the last update. Wish I could say I had time to finish all my stories or at least update them in a timely fashion, but my workload isn't lightening up any time soon.

P.S. This is sort of a fluff chapter.

Diclaimer: No. As usual, all mistakes are mine. If my knowledge of things isn't correct let's just blame it on the internet and that this story is AU.


The sound of the elevator door opening was still something she was getting used to. Every time the door opened her mind kept telling her it would be Castle.

It wasn't.

He hasn't been coming around the precinct for a while now, he hasn't talked to her since they talked in the break room after his last case. It was only a couple of days ago but without his theories or comments the past two days had gone by excruciatingly slow. Though she has started to look up less often when the ding from the elevator signifies a new person is stepping foot into the twelfth, she still ends up looking for his smiling face more often than not.

He told her he needed time to think, she understands. She felt the same way when he had iterated to her that he wanted more out of their relationship, their partnership. She was at a loss for words and she understood that now, he may be the one who needed time to find their voice. She would give him as much time as he needed while hoping that when he was ready to talk he would say he wants to stay.

He said he would call.

He promised.

And she trusted he would.


She had something she wanted to take care of before he told her his decision anyway. Beckett had wanted to already have done this the same day she told Castle how she felt. She wanted to let Josh know that whatever thing they had started wasn't going to work. She had no worries that Josh would be angry or too upset about it. They had only gone on a handful of dates and none of them had gone exceptionally well. Their first official date was actually the time he showed up at the precinct. They had met a few times before but they hadn't considered those dates. He was a nice guy but he wasn't what she recently realized she wanted. And on top of that, Josh wasn't what she knew she needed.

Although Beckett wasn't going to be seeing Josh around at all, give or take a slightly awkward run in here or there, and though she wasn't even sure if they were ever exclusive, she didn't want to send him a text or call him to end things. Beckett wanted to do it in person instead. She wanted Josh to get that sense of finality. From a previous experience she knows that sending a text or breaking up over the phone doesn't ever go well. One thing she learned was a breakup in a textual form is a rude way of saying we're over. Like the person wasn't worth enough of your time to see them in person to tell them face to face.

The only problem with breaking up with Josh in person was he was never around. Luckily he wasn't on another Doctors without Borders trip, but he was still always busy. She had tried to meet up with him for the past two days to talk to him and he has had to work each time. She was getting restless trying to arrange a time for them to talk. Finally she just sent him a text telling her to let her know when he had time to see her and if he didn't have time then to just call her.

If he couldn't find a time to meet her in person she would just have to find him at his job. The last thing she wants is for Castle to come to her with an answer while she still hasn't been able to talk to Josh.


Beckett was currently shuffling through the papers on her desk searching for a case file. She could have sworn she had it in her hands not but five minutes ago. She was becoming surprised to see how distracted and lost she seemed to be without the writer creepily staring at her while sitting in his chair next to her desk. She was used to him doing those kinds of things and his staring has become a little less a creepy and maybe even a little more sweet recently. And not to mention but when he stares, at least she has someone to tell her where she left case files.

With an annoyed sigh, she turned to the guys to ask them if they had seen what she did with the file.

"Hey Ryan and Esposito, do you know what I did that case file I had earlier? The one from the case we just wrapped up the other day?"

As she looked back at the guys she wasn't much surprised by what she saw. It was a rare day that they weren't working on an open case and today it showed.

On days they didn't have a case they were stuck at their desks going over old cases and catching up on the paperwork that piled up during open murder investigations.

When she swiveled her chair around to face the guys, she saw Esposito trying to type up one of the files he had been working on, though she wouldn't consider what he was doing as typing. Rather, he was poking at the keys on the keyboard, using only his index fingers and an occasional pinky finger, which reminded her of a chicken pecking the ground for loose feed. It was no wonder Esposito always had paperwork piled up on his desk.

Glancing over to Ryan she was met with a different scene entirely. It seemed he was taking a break from his paperwork, though it was more likely he never started. He sat with his feet propped up on his desk and his chair angled back. From the looks of it, Ryan was trying his hardest switching from trying to balance the tip of a pencil on his right index finger and tilting his head towards the ceiling so he could balance the pencil on his nose.

Apparently, Ryan was too busy with mastering the art of pencil balancing to answer Beckett or even realize she had spoken, so she directed the question over to Esposito.

Esposito broke his eyes away from the glow of the computer screen to answer Beckett.

"I'm not sure where it is Beckett, I'm working on typing up my notes from the case about the guy who was killed on that subway terminal."

"You mean the guy found on the Downtown C train?"

"Yeah Beckett, that's the one."

Beckett looked at him incredulously and with a bit of humor showing from the slight upturn of her lips.

"Esposito, we wrapped up that case weeks ago! You still haven't finished writing and typing up the report?"

"Well if Montgomery asks I have, but in reality, I have a bit more to type up."

"Maybe Montgomery should have you take a class on typing so you type less like a bird and more like a person."

"Yeah and maybe he should have you take a class on elephants, at least they wouldn't have forgotten where they put a case file."

Beckett gave a shake of her head and let out a small chuckle.

"Okay Espo, I'll give you that one, I have been known to misplace things from time to time."

Ryan seemed to come out of his pencil skill induced silence, joining the conversation with the loud squeak which came from his chair when it returned to its normal upright position.

"Yeah but Beckett hasn't misplaced near as many things since Castle has been around. By the way, you may mock Javi but it is true you know, elephants rarely forget. And did you know they mourn the loss of a loved one. They even sit vigil for the family member that died."

Esposito redirected his gaze towards his partner with his eyebrow raised slightly while he crossed his arms in front of him and leaned back in his chair.

"Alright Honey-Milk, I appreciate you having my back with that little fact I had about elephants, but how in the hell do you know that about elephants? It's like you're turning into a mini Castle with all the comments you've been saying lately."

"I'll have you know I wrote a report in my fifth grade science class on elephants and I received an A for my knowledge of the Loxodonta Africana and the Elephas Maximus."

"I'm gonna pretend I know what you just said and go back to my typing."

Just as Ryan was about to explain the names he listed off, Beckett cut him off and answered for him.

"Loxodonta Africana is the genus and specie that refers to African elephants and Elephas Maximus refers to Asian elephants, isn't that right Ryan?"

"Yeah it is, how'd you know that?"

"You weren't the only kid in the world who liked elephants enough to do a report on them. Anyway, have you seen that report I was talking about Ryan?"

"Not sure, but I think I remember you having a case folder in your hand when you went into the break room earlier to grab a coffee."

"Kay, thanks Ryan."

"No problem."


With that, Beckett turned on her heels and made her way into the empty break room. She remembers now, setting the case file down and going to pour herself a coffee when she stopped herself. It was silly on her part, she knew, but when she went to grab her NYPD coffee mug she came across the mug Castle used and she became easily distracted. Another reminder of Castle and what she very well had already lost.

She broke out of the fog and made her way to the table in the break room where the case file sat undisturbed. She walked swiftly out of the break room and to her desk with the file in her hands.

For the moment being, the only thing in her control seemed to be writing the case into the system. So, she took the one thing she could control and got to work, reminding herself to give Castle time, and hoping the rest would eventually fall into place.


A/N: I know it's a shorter chapter, but continuing this one would have made the cutoff for the next chapter awkward. Yeah, let's go with that.

Thanks to everyone who has read, favorited, followed, or reviewed this story as well as my other stories. I appreciate all of you guys. I hope to update my other stories soon as well but unfortunately the real world comes first. Got to pay the wifi bill. :)

TBC