Chapter 9

Hey you guys! Guess what? I only had to draw for two hours so my butt doesn't kill that much anymore! Woot! Anyways, I'm bored so I guess I'll update. Oh, and btw, if this chapter seems more random than usual, it's because they were the original ideas for a chapter of Attack of the Inners, but I forgot about them until I recently looked at the files and stuff…so…yeah

I'd also like to thank all my AWESOME reviewers for this fic and "Attack of the Inners"….anyways, if you have any ideas, I'd be happy to listen to them since it's kinda getting harder to write this fic….

Oh, I'd also like to announce that I'm open to any requests –I'll only do Naruto and they'll be oneshots, unless they're brilliant…like awesome…not like all your ideas aren't, it's just that some might appeal to me more than others….

Disclaimer: This is the most depressing thing you will ever read. I do not own Naruto. 

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"Oh Sasuke, I'm so sorry!" Sakura rushed over and gently pressed her hand against Sasuke's burn..-cough-crotch-cough-…and quickly healed it with chakra. Meanwhile, Sai was laughing his guts out.

"Sak…Sak…Sakura…" Sai said between pants, "that …was….awesome!"

Sakura frowned, remembering that she was still PO'ed and that it was Sai who made her burn Sasuke's…er…crotch.

"SAI! YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS!"

Everybody at Ichiraku's stopped eating and stared at Sakura.

Chirp.

Chirp.

Ribbit.

Sakura snapped.

"WHERE THE HECK IS THE FREAKING FROG! THAT THING'S GONNA DIE!"

Naruto went over and tried to calm down Sakura –seriously, he didn't want his favorite ramen stand to be crushed and in the dirt because of a frog.

However, Sakura didn't listen to him.

"WHERE IS THAT FROG?" She scanned the room and found it cowering in a corner. She walked up slowly to it and picked it up before it could hop away.

"So…little frog….what should I do with you?…" At this point, people began backing away from her.

"hmm…." Sakura's face suddenly turned red, "I WILL KILL YOU!"

The frog, too scared for its own good, was scarred for life at the sight of a very mad Sakura. It struggled against Sakura's tight grip and managed to jump out.

FREEDOM!

Slam!

Or not.

It seemed as if the frog had just jumped and slammed into the wall. Seeing Sakura heading towards it again, it stupidly kept slamming itself against the wall, trying to get out of the situation.

Slam.

Slam.

Slam.

After about 5 minutes of bashing its head into the wall, the frog stopped, apparently dead.

Silence.

Everybody looked at Sakura.

It was the chef who spoke up first.

"So, who wants some frog legs with ramen?"

O.O

After the big lady sitting in the back with a hairy mole said that she would like the frog, everybody started acting normally again. Naruto, Sai, Itachi, Kakashi, and Sasuke crowded around Sakura.

"Sakura…"

Sakura looked up at Sai, who was speaking.

"You do know that you just caused a frog to commit suicide…"

Itachi began cracking up.

Sakura pouted and folded up her arms.

"So what? I don't like frogs anyways and at least I didn't have to kill it…"

Sai smirked, "But Ms. Ugly, it seems as if your ugly face has actually killed someone!"

At this, Sakura lunged at Sai; however, Naruto and Kakashi held her back just in time.

"Sakura…think about this…do you want to be responsible for murder?"

Sakura paused and the group waited a few moments until she calmed down.

"Fine…but Sai," Sakura looked at him…or rather, glared at him, "you got off lucky this time…"

The others sighed, glad that this was over.

"Well, now, don't you and Sasuke have someplace to go, Sakura?" Kakashi glanced knowingly at the pink haired girl.

"Errr…no…." Sakura and Sasuke both looked vaguely confused.

Kakashi grinned. It was time to put the plan into action.

"Oh! I didn't tell you? Well, you guys are in for a surprise. Just go into the bathroom and change into these."

Kakashi gave Sasuke and Sakura some bags –Sasuke got a hot pink one and Sakura got a black one.

"…"

"Just go!" Kakashi was beginning to get impatient. It seems as if he had finished the latest Icha Icha Paradise and wanted to read more and was suffering from post-porn depression. Ahh…life sucks for him…anyways, back to the fic.

Five minutes later, Sasuke and Sakura came out of the bathroom. Sasuke was wearing a low cut strappy dress with black fishnets and combat boots while Sakura was in guy wear. Naruto turned around with Hinata at that exact moment and started laughing so hard ramen was coming out of his nose.

Sai and Itachi, on the other hand, were twitching.

Sai cleared his throat, "Er…why don't you guys switch outfits…I think you'll be more…er…comfortable that way…"

Itachi suddenly snorted. It seemed as if he was beginning to lose it.

Ten minutes later, Sasuke and Sakura walked out, and this time, the room was silent for a good reason. Reason number one was because the outfit was giving Sakura a new fan club complete with fanboys. Reason number two was because Sasuke wasn't wearing fishnets anymore (now THAT is a relief….XD).

The group exited the ramen place and stood outside, breathing in the night air. Kakashi coughed.

"Er…you guys have to be blindfolded for this too…and Sasuke, you can't use your Sharingan….got it?"

Sakura pouted and Sasuke scowled, but none of them surprising questioned them. Unfortunately, it was because they really did NOT want to know where they were going.

After being blindfolded, the group walked on. Sai was holding Sakura's hand while Itachi was walking beside Sasuke. With Naruto and Hinata too busy making out and walking (is that possible?) alongside each other, Kakashi tried to start a conversation.

"So…do you like your outfits?"

Sasuke and Sakura immediately began to blush. Meanwhile, Sasuke was having another "talk" with his Inner.

You know you like her and god…she looked awesome in that outfit…

Can you leave me alone? I'm walking on a path blilnfolded and I can't use my Sharingan or Kakashi will probably force me to read Icha Icha Paradise or something else wrong…

Hey! Who said Icha Icha Paradise was bad? It's actually a very…er…EDUCATIONAL book….

I can't believe my Inner is so much like Kakashi…Hey, do you know Kakashi?

He's actually one of my closest friends….

Thought so… What was that? Hn… Anyways, back to the subject…you LIKE Sakura, don't you? No… Oh, so does that mean you LOVE her?

Can you leave me alone? You're getting really annoying….

Not until you admit that she looked FINE in that outfit…seriously, she should think about wearing corsets and those dresses more often…

Leave. Me. Alone.

Not until you say the magic words….(as you can see, Sasuke's Inner is …well…as annoying as I can be sometimes…XD)

Fine! SHE LOOKED FREAKING SEXY IN THAT OUTFIT! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? Ha ha…look around you, Sasuke…

Sasuke snapped back to reality and found that everyone was staring at him.

"What?"

Kakashi eyed the Uchiha mockingly, "Did you just say that Sakura looked …er…FINE in that outfit?"

"I said that out loud?" Sasuke began blushing…well, if you looked at his face with a microscope or something, you'd see that his face was somewhat pinkish.

"Ooooohhhh….Sasuke's BLUSHING!" Sai crooned, smirking at Sasuke.

"Shutup…"

"What did you say, Mr. Chicken?"

"Itachi…cut it OUT!" Sasuke was beginning to lose his patience.

Meanwhile, Sakura was turning really really red.

Hell yeah! Sasuke likes me! No…he just thinks you look good….I mean, he could say that to anyone… Even to Lee?

Inner Sakura started thinking about what would happen if Sasuke went up to Lee and said that he looked good.

Sakura burst out laughing.

Cricket.

Cricket.

Kakashi, Sai, and Itachi started staring at Sakura weirdly. (Sasuke couldn't cuz he has his blindfold, remember?)

"What?" Sakura was confused about why they had stopped walking.

"…"

"…"

"…"

Kakashi finally spoke up, "You guys, we're here! Just don't rip off your blindfolds yet, okay?"

The group walked into the building and into a small room.

"Where are we?" Sakura wondered out loud.

"Er…you'll see…" Itachi was grinning evilly, which made Naruto and Hinata back away from him and continue making out in a corner.

They reached the end of a long corridor and entered a small room. Kakashi undid Sasuke and Sakura's blindfolds and they opened their eyes.

"Where are we?"

"What is this place?"

"This…" Kakashi announced proudly, "is the Konoha Morgue."

At this, Itachi and Sai pushed Sasuke and Sakura into a coffin.

Need I say a SMALL CRAMPED coffin.

"WTF!"

"KAKASHI YOU ARE DEAD ONCE WE GET OUT OF THIS!"

Kakashi smirked and locked (let's just say this coffin needs a lock, okay? XD) the coffin up. Luckily, there were little holes in the coffin so the two could breathe in there.

"You two aren't getting out of there until tomorrow night, got it?"

Sounds of muffled swearing came out of the coffin as it started to rattle.

"Sakura, your strength won't work. The more you punch, the more chakra it'll suck out of you…I suggest you don't use any chakra and cooperate with the Uchiha, got it?" Sasuke and Sakura could tell Sai was smirking as he spoke.

A few minutes later, they could hear a door slam and everything in the coffin went and darker. It was now pitch black. Sasuke, not liking this one bit, activated his Sharingan.

"SASUKE! TURN YOUR EYES OFF!" Sakura screamed, "I don't want to look at red eyes for 48 hours…plus, now we'll be late for Tsunade!"

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(at Tsunade's office)

"Tsunade, they're locked up in a coffin right now. Mission status is almost complete!" Sai announced to the Hokage, who was pouring herself a drink.

"Good, now why don't you all go to the bar with me tonight, okay?"

Kakashi, Itachi, and Sai grimaced but nodded.

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(at morgue)

"SASUKE! STOP TOUCHING MY BOOBS!" A scream was heard throughout Konoha.

"Sakura…it was an accident. It's either we touch each other –and not THAT way –or we suffocate." Sasuke was trying to remain calm, however, the bulge between his pants was beginning to grow.

"Sasuke….STOP HUMPING ME!"

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So, how do you like it? Sorry it's shorter but I'm sticking to the policy –I got 8 reviews so I typed 8 pages. Anyways, it'd really help if I got some evil ideas and stuff…so yeah…and THANK YOU to all who have reviewed and who are GOING to review!

Ja ne!