WARNING: you might need tissues.
"sit down Sam" he gently pushed Sam onto the couch and grabbed blanket after blanket wrapping them around his little brother. Trying desperately to warm him up.
"Sssorry" he murmured.
"Its ok just lay down and keep warm it wasn't your fault." Sam didn't lay down he just sat there staring down at his lap. Dean shivered and grabbed himself his own jacket. Need to build a fire. "Deeean" he ignored his brother. Other wise were both going to freeze to death. "DDean" he turned as Sam's voice grew stronger and stared at his brother.
Tears fell from his eyes as he stared at his brother. "I cant do this anymore Dean. I I I barely remember what it was like growing up. Its there but I cant reach it. I want to remember but I cant. I don't want to do this anymore Dean. I cant." Sam's hand slowly pushed its way out of the blankets that surrounded him and reached for the gun that sat on the couch. Dean froze. He wouldn't.
Sam clicked the safety back with trembling fingers and looked at Dean with resignation in his eyes. "I'm sorry" he put the gun under his jaw as his eyes fluttered closed.
Dean ran at his brother. "SAM NO" he grabbed the gun before he could pull the trigger yanking the gun away from him.
His heart beat widely as he broke down. Dean dropped to his knees sobbing. "Damn it Sam don't do that to me. Please you cant leave me. Not like this. Not this way. I'm sorry Sammy I'm so sorry" he put his head in his hands as the tears flowed unable to control them unable to control himself any longer. He always put on a mask for Sam so his kid brother could see him as strong, as powerful and most of all not weak but it all came crumbling down around him. Leaving him exposed for his brothers eyes to take in what a true weakling Dean really was.
He felt his brothers hand, cold yet warm on his and he looked up to see the smiling face of Sam. "It wasn't your fault De. It was only a matter of time till it broke. I don't want you to see either" he laughed and looked down. Sam's hand still rested on Deans. "Madison asked me to do it I think and it killed me. It was unfair of me to ask you. So please" he looked at his little brother. "just go outside or something."
"Sam"
"Don't make me live with this Dean. I cant" his voice broke and he looked at his little brother and wanted to die. He couldn't do this himself but he couldn't let Sammy do it either. Dean held the gun and looked at his brother. Tears fell down his face as he hugged his little brother holding him tightly. "I love you Sammy. Forever little brother. God I am so sorry." he held him even tighter.
"Its not your fault Dean. I love you too. Please forgive me big brother."
Dean raised the gun and placed it under Sam's jaw.
Sam relaxed into his big brother as a sense of peace and saftey coursed through him. Everything was going to be ok because Dean was here.
Dean closed his eyes and breathed.
"I'm sorry" and then he pulled the trigger.
He heard the bullet rip through his brothers head, heard the sickening blood splatter on the ceiling and most importantly he felt his brother drop in his arms. Sam's hands that clutched his back released and all the weight fell into his arms. He crumpled into his older brother and was no more.
Dean dropped the gun like it burned him and he grabbed his brothers back and began rocking him. The sobbing rocked through his body kicking his ass but none of that mattered. All that mattered was his baby brother was dead in his arms by his own hand.
"I'm so sorry Sammy. So sorry" he rocked him until he couldn't bare to hold his precious brother any longer.
He gently lifted Sam's shoulders, avoiding looking at his brother he laid him down. He pulled the blankets tighter around his brothers still form and stared. Most of the damage was the back of his head but when he set him onto the pillow he looked so young so peaceful and so dead. Dean sobbed and stroked his baby brothers face. "I'm so sorry." he backed away picking up the hated weapon, a bottle of open whiskey and walked to Sam's favorite corner back pressed against the wall he slide down taking a long drink. Back pinned eyes trained on his brother sleeping figure. Sleeping?
Ha he wished. No his little brother was gone forever.
Bobby pulled up to the old cabin he and john found many years ago. It had been destroyed when they found it, Bobby thought it was a piece of junk but John saw something beautiful in it and so for a couple of weeks they fixed this house up as the boys camped right outside loving the freedom of the motels and just enjoying nature.
Specially Dean. He would spend hours sitting by the river, climbing trees, running and taunting Sam who enjoyed just sitting on a rock reading his books smelling the fresh air he never wanted to run or climb the trees he was perfectly happy sitting on his rock. His boys were at peace here and that's why Dean picked this place to keep his brother at, to keep him safe. The panic room was safer but this was safe with freedom.
Dean had sounded worse over the phone than the last times they had talked. He knew Sam was getting worse with each passing day. Bobby sighed as he looked up at the house. Dean was barely holding on and Sam was losing touch with reality. These boys had done so much for people and what do they get out of it? Insanity, losing family, or nothing. Seriously they had the worse luck.
Bobby grabbed his bag and headed up the stairs the door was slightly opened and that gave him pause. He pulled back and set the bags down pulling out his gun. Dean wouldn't leave the door open for any reason it was freezing here. "Dean" no answer.
He slowly pushed open the door and walked into the freezing room. He shivered it was colder in here than out there by a lot. Bobby slowly made his way to the kitchen ,empty. He turned around and spotted Sam. Sleeping on the couch looking deathly pale.
"Dean" he wouldn't leave Sam alone like this. Unless something real bad happened. Bobby still held the gun but lowered it slightly walking towards Sam. The boy looked to pale for his own good. He was feet away from Sam now. "Sam?"
he reached out for his boy. "Don't touch him" the voice was so low and yet deadly sending a shiver down bobby's spin. He turned and saw the oldest Winchester sitting in the corner. Booze in hand, empty, his gun hanging loosely from his grip as he just stared at Sam.
"Dean? what's wrong with your brother." fear engulfed Bobby as he looked down at Sam. It was getting dark in the room so he flipped a switch and light took over the room. He wished he had left it dark. Sam was pale and there was a blue tint to his lips now but what broke his heart was how the pillow was covered in blood. "dean what" Tears fell down his old face as he stared at his youngest. Sam was 28. He had known the boy for 26 years and it hadn't been long enough. He wasn't old enough to die! He hadn't even had a life yet. "Sam" he whispered wanting to reach out and touch his sons face to comfort the boy who no longer was here but he was afraid. Either of Dean shooting him or the feel of his cold skin he didn't know.
"You know the first time we met you" Deans voice seemed loud in the quiet room. Bobby looked at his oldest who only had eyes for his brother. "I was 7 and Sam was 3. Dad he refused to really expose us to anyone but for some reason you were ok. He said trust Bobby he has you for the weekend. Dropped us off and took off before we even got to your front door." Dean smiled at the memory. Bobby glanced at Sam before he walked over to Dean.
He was pale and drunk. Eyes red and puffy. As he stared at his little brother tears slowly leaked out of his eyes recalling the memory.
"We walked in and Sammy wouldn't leave my side. He only trusted me. " Deans voice was ruff but full of love when he talked about his brother. "you showed us to our room and you left us so we could get comfortable. We never did. We left everything packed and that night Sammy cried and I held him telling him it would ok that Dad would be back we would be on the road again that he was safe as long as I was around." tears continued down his face staining his beatened down face. "He looked at me with such trust and I…I knew then that he was the most important person in my life no one would ever compare." he choked on a sob but continued.
"You let us have ice cream for breakfast and after that Sam loved you." he laughed. Bobby smiled. "He thought you were Santa just with ice cream. But me? I didn't trust you. I never let you be alone with Sammy. But one night Sam sat on my lap and looked at me. His eyes so full of wonder and reassurance even at such a young age he knew what was going on. He said I know you cry De. You miss daddy too." Dean choked on his tears but continued. "I said ya I do miss him. He said bobby is a good guy he is our Santa."
Bobby smiled as tears began to pour out of the old hunters eyes. "He said and he is not dad but he could be our second daddy." Bobby sobbed at that part and glanced over at the still form of Sam. He remembered that three year old who was giddy for life and had looked up to Dean as if he were God himself. His brother could do no wrong for he was Dean.
Dean continued. "He clutched at my shirt and said don't be sad De dad may leave but I wont ever leave you big brother. Me and you De forever brothers." he just looked at Sam while the tears fell from both older men as they both stared at Sammy. Peaceful in death.
"He was losing it Bobby. I found him down by the river he started saying he was coming." Dean took a deep breath. " I took him home trying to warm everything up he tried to shoot him self but" Bobby gulped he knew the truth now and he wanted to cry. "but I stopped him. He said he couldn't live like this so I hugged him. I took the gun and I - I " he couldn't finish and Bobby didn't want him to finish. "Dean dont-"
"I killed my family Bobby." his words were like knives in Bobby's heart. "I killed my brother." Dean whispered his eyes never left Sam.
"Dean I'm sorry its gonna be ok" bull shit he thought.
"It cant be ok Bobby I killed my baby brother. I was suppose to take care of him, he was my responsibility and I-I killed him" Deans voice broke he couldn't speak anymore. It was to much. Bobby looked around and didn't know what to do. This happened at least 5 or so hours ago maybe even longer and he needed to help his oldest now. Dean would never be the same but he needed to get him away from this place.
His eyes landed on Sam and knew what needed to be done. Even though his heart screamed at him for it. It was to soon to try an move on to try and live but he had to get Dean away. It was the only way to bring one son home alive, physically anyways. "I'm going to get shovels and were gonna burry Sam. He loved this place so we'll leave him here where he felt safest." Dean didn't say anything and Bobby left. looking for the tools of death that would take his son away. That would open up the ground once again but this time the dirt would be a bed and it would wrap around his youngest protecting him before nature set in.
When Bobby returned he paused next to Sam shovels in hands he could barely look at him without wanting to cry but his eyes bore into Dean who was staring at the gun in his hands inserting a clip.
"Dean" he knew his boy and he couldn't lose him too. Sam would never forgive Dean.
"your great Bobby you know that." Dean clicked the gun. His voice low and gruff. "I always wanted you to be my dad and to take care of me and Sam and you did so much for us, thank you. I'm sorry though" he looked up tears spilled over his wide pleading eyes as he put the gun under his jaw.
"DEAN"
"I just cant do it. don't make me live through this. Please. " he pulled the trigger and Dean Winchester was no more.
Bobby just stared at Deans body and couldn't do anything. His boys head was tilted to the side the wall behind him decorated in his blood, hands limp and eyes open seeing nothing. Bobby trembled. The shovels dropped from his hands, he could feel the sobs shake through him, threatening to take over.
"CAS" he screamed he couldn't do this. He couldn't lose the boys not so soon, to young!
Bobby blinked and in a second Cas stood next to him observing the damage. "Fix this" he growled at the angel.
The angel slowly walked forward till he stood in the middle of the chaos and looked from Sam to Dean sighing was all that was heard throughout the room. He looked at the ground as sadness drifted over him. "I cant fix them Bobby. I could maybe bring back Dean but Sam, he is long gone he would only return insane and I'm guessing by the looks of it that Dean pulled the trigger that ended Sam's life." Cas glanced at the old hunter but Bobby looked away.
Cas nodded and looked back at the horrific scene. Two brave young men who should have gone down fighting, not this way. This was to unfair. God always had a plan so what was this one?
"Well then I wont bring Dean back he ended his life to escape the pain of what he did and I wont force him to live with it and you shouldn't either. It would cause more damage then any good." Cas turned to leave when Bobby began to sob. He knew that the dumb ass angel was right but it still hurt. His boys. His family were gone and the old useless hunter was still here!.
Cas touched his shoulder and Bobby meet his gaze. "Normally this would be a suicide murder deal but I shall arrange for it to be seen differently. Your boys will get the heavens they deserve, I swear." the wind blew in and with the dying wind Cas was gone.
He looked to Sam then to Dean, it was to much. He fell to the floor and cried. He cried until dawn broke and the old hunter was nothing left. Standing slowly he began to move, he felt robotic almost he was barely aware of what he was doing until he stood in front of a pyre. He built it big enough for two, this would be their final show down then.
When Bobby returned he began to pick Sam up first, or tried to. The boy was heavy but now it was all dead weight. He tried again but nothing.
"Dammit" he growled as tears sprang to his eyes.
"Let me" he turned to see Cas there again. The angel walked forward, lightly touching the youngest Winchesters head and in and instant Sam's body was gone. Cas walked over to Dean and did the same thing.
He turned and looked at the hunter both with pain and understanding in their eyes they made their away outside to the two bodies that were wrapped up in gauze laying over wood ready to begin the next life. Bobby had tears going again as he lit the bottom.
The flames licked and swirled as they grew and soon engulfed his two boys. Turning them into nothing but ash.
FINISHED!
OR NOT.
OK PEOPLE I SAW IT ENDING LIKE THIS BUT I DONT REALLY LIKE LEAVING IT LIKE THIS. SO PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK. LET THEM DIE or try something else.
PLEASE review REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW
