Honestly, writing this chapter is a big step for me. I haven't written properly in two years. I probably wouldn't have started again if it wasn't for Rubiksmaniac, who once promised to message me every other week to make sure I was okay. They have kept their promise despite my absence and seeing those messages has willed me to open my laptop and write again. Thank you.

Please be kind, it's time for me to find out how easy it is to get back into this writing game.

It was time to go home.

Beca was a determined soul and refused to let Chloe wheel her the second she got outside of the hospital. Her arms were aching more than they ever had, but she gritted her teeth and pushed on to Baker Hall. For now, she was to stay in her room with Kimmy Jin until a wheelchair-accessible room was prepared for her to move into. Chloe had offered a thousand times for Beca to move into the flat with her and Aubrey, but it still wouldn't be suitable for Beca's chair. The only plus side would be that Chloe would always by right there to help her; to hold her... But Beca couldn't do that to her. As if she didn't have enough emotional baggage to begin with, she now had the physical baggage to follow suit.

Chloe stepped ahead of Beca as they approached her dorm room door to unlock it ahead of her friend. She still had a cast on her arm but thankfully she had adjusted to life with it - not to say she wasn't more than ready to get rid of it the second everything had healed. "Here we go," Chloe said, breaking the silence as she stepped out of the way. The floor was very narrow and there was hardly any room for Beca to wheel in a straight line, let alone turn the chair around. "Do you need anything babe?" she asked Beca gently, not sure whether it was best for her to stay or go right now.
"I just need some space."

She didn't say it coldly and wasn't meant to cause offence, but it still hurt Chloe somewhere deep in her chest. She knew that logic and reason pointed to Beca needing time to get used to her new body and her new limitations; it didn't stop it being painful for Chloe to watch the woman she felt so strongly towards look so lost and in pain. "Could you um..." Beca's voice roused Chloe from her thoughts, "Could you help me into bed? They're only installing the assistance frame in my new place."
"Sure," Chloe replied, taking a cautious step towards Beca and reaching her good arm out towards her. She watched as Beca positioned her wheelchair as close to the bed as possible before looping her arm tightly around Beca's waist, pulling her up and across to the mattress. From there, Beca used her arms to shuffle into position on the bed before pulling the duvet over herself.

Chloe smiled softly at her as she reached down and placed a gentle kiss on Beca's forehead. "Text me if you want me, okay?"
Beca nodded in response and whispered, "Thank you," as Chloe made sure the wheelchair was within reach in case Beca should need it.

It took a long time for Beca to stop staring at the wall opposite her bed and thinking about everything and nothing, but eventually the stillness and silence was starting to torture her. She reached down for her laptop beside her bed and pulled it onto her lap, painfully aware of the lack of sensation when she slammed it down onto her lap and opened the lid.

Her desktop background was her playing with the band. She decided to leave it that way until she decided how exactly it made her feel and pushed on to open her music collection. Eventually the constant playing and pausing and skipping of music provoked a few audible sighs from Kimmy Jin, and for the first time Beca actually turned it off. Usually, Kimmy Jin's complaints and sighs did nothing to Beca except prompt her to turn the volume up, but she was feeling tired today and wanted nothing more than a quiet life.

Besides, the music caused as many conflicting feelings as seeing the photo of her and the band did. It was like a dull ache in her stomach of happiness at the memory, but complete and utter despair and the thought of never being able to be a part of that again. So she shut her laptop and slid down into her bed, pulling the cover over her face until she fell asleep.

As soon as Chloe got home she knew she needed something to take her mind off Beca. She sat at her desk and turned on her laptop, knowing she would be grasping at straws but she didn't care. Aubrey came in, ate dinner, and left again without her best friend looking up from her computer screen once.
"Paralysis being fixed"
"Treatment options for paralysis"
"Paralysis miracles."

There was nothing. Nothing useful. Nothing that would apply to Beca. Nothing Chloe could ever do to help.

She slammed her laptop shut and kicked the side of the desk, feeling the pain in her toes for a few hours after.