Ahem. Hello there.
Billy Beg and The Little Mermaid, Pt 1 and Pt 1-and-a-Half
Main Characters:
Jason: Plays Billy Beg
Brynn: Plays the Little Mermaid
Valerie: Plays herself
John: Is an OC of sorts.
Other Characters:
Sally
Spencer
Laura
Ben
Raymond
Christie
Alex
Delilah
Once upon a time there was in Ireland(aka the Land of Ire in Fairytalelandia, aka the Land of Anger Issues) a King and Queen, and they had one son, Jason. The Queen gave Jason a bull that he was very fond of, and it was just as fond of him.
After some time the Queen died, and she put it as her last request to the King that he never part Billy and the bull; and the King promised that, come what might, come what may, he would not. After his wife died, the King married again, and the new Queen didn't take to Jason, and no more did she like the bull, seeing himself and Jason so thick.
This is not true.
Jason was a poor farm boy, much like many other heroes. His father gave Jason a bull, his last possession and only gift to the boy. Ever.
Jason took care of it, and lo and behold; the creature spoke to him! The local villagers thought he was crazy, talking to a bull, so they called up the hen-wife- a woman who raises chickens- to see what they could do about separating them. And giving the people a good meal- for once.
"Naturally, I want a reward for my services," the hen-wife, Delilah asked. The people shrugged at each other and looked at her. "Whatever you ask," they said. Delilah grinned. "Hmm… I'll have to get back to you on that. Have all of your sons and grandsons and whatever other generations of sons you have in your families go to their beds, and pretend they are sick. I'll take care of the rest."
"Really?" one particularly curious townsfolk asked. She laughed. "No. But don't worry, you will end up getting rid of the bull."
Just then, a group of people walked into town. Delilah frowned. "Whoops, gotta go. I'll get back to you on that Jason fellow."
She gently put the hen she was stroking down, then disappeared in green smoke. There was coughing.
"Still not used to that."
Brynn smiled, looking at all the shops and stuff lining the roads. She gasped and ooh-ed and aah-ed at certain things.
"Look at this stuff!" she cried. "Isn't it neat?"
"For the nine hundred thirty-second time, yes," Laura replied. Brynn grabbed a lamp from a mysterious looking merchant. "What's this thing?"
"That is a mystical lamp. Legend says that if you rub it, a genie will come and grant-"
"BORING!" Brynn exclaimed, setting it back on the counter. "I want something exciting, something magical, something I can use to get higher up in the world!" she said, then walked away. The merchant was left blinking and sputtering.
Valerie laughed. "What is there about a magic lamp that doesn't appeal to you, Brynn?" she asked. Brynn shrugged. "I came across the weirdest thing a few days ago. There was this guy, who fell into the water, with a gag on his mouth and chains on his legs, and he fell unconscious underwater. Then a lamp, which, by the way, looked more like a teapot, came down, and this weird blue guy showed up, spoke to him, then blasted him out in some sort of weird craft. I think it was making whale sounds."
"That would be a submarine," Valerie supplied, grinning. She turned to the others, walking backwards and miraculously avoiding a huge mirror, two guards, and one boot-wearing cat, and asked, "How about you guys? Anything strange happen in the past few weeks?"
"Aside from being turned into a wolf, spending the night as a wolf, being turned back into a human, and then seeing a dragon, a mermaid, a cat wearing boots, a green lady twice, now, and a talking seashell all on the Same day… no," Ben said. Spencer looked down at himself. "Look at me. Everything about this just screams 'strange,'" he said. Alex frowned. "The strangest thing that has happened to me was being stopped by a 'puh-lot' line." he said.
"I fought a dragon," Raymond said. Spencer coughed. "I believe your exact words were, 'Knock, knock."
"Okay, so I didn't exactly fight a dragon, but still. I climbed a beanstalk."
"I climbed the beanstalk," Valerie corrected him. He folded his arms. "I was up there, wasn't I? How about me making the beanstalk fall?"
"Again, that was me," Spencer said. Raymond frowned. "Do I get credit for anything?"
"You did point out the tidal wave," Alex said.
"Thank you."
"I witnessed my brother as a wolf, my brother not as a wolf, and pretty much everything else he said qualify as strange stuff I've seen in the past few weeks," Laura admitted. Christie shrugged. "After eating that poisoned peach, nothing will ever surprise me," she said, then her gaze caught that of a crazy-looking man with green hair, white skin, black eyes and a red mouth. She blinked and looked away. "Except maybe that."
Sally laughed. "You guys got it easy. Some random stranger showed up on my front lawn last night, I went to a ball, met Prince Neal, found out Prince Neal was a jerk, left with the stranger, met a girl who was running from a huntsman who was going to bring her heart to the queen but actually wasn't, met a guy who was turned into a wolf, met his sister, met seven dwarves, eight if you count Valerie aka Sarcasm, then met a farm boy, a dragon/giant, a mermaid, a green lady, a talking shell, and Prince Neal again, all in two days. And I'm pretty sure we had a weird time skip somewhere in there, because we went straight from midnight to afternoon in one round of 'three heel clicks'. So if you think you've seen strange, you obviously haven't."
"I saw a flying carpet!" Brynn piped up. "And weird things I think were called fire-works."
Valerie shrugged, ducking to avoid a guy holding a tray. "So, who are we looking for now?" she asked. They all looked at her.
"You don't know?" Sally asked. "I thought the whole reason we were coming here was because you knew who we were looking for!"
"Oh, right, your brother," Valerie mumbled. Sally tipped her head. "What?"
"Nothing," Valerie said. She turned back around finally and ran smack into a bull's hide. She backed up, shaking her head dizzily. "Ow. What was that?"
"Excuse me," came a boy's voice. He poked his head out from behind the white and brown bull.
"Jason!" Valerie exclaimed. She glared at the sky. "Finally, we can go home."
"How do you know my name?" Jason asked.
"Lucky guess," everyone chorused. Valerie looked down and shook her head. "Nope! If you guys recall, Raymond mentioned Jason when we were up the beanstalk," she said. Jason peered at the group. "Is Raymond here? Good. I need your help. The townspeople want my bull dead, and they're pretending to be sick, with the only cure being the blood of my bull."
The cow mooed mournfully a few times, and Jason patted it's neck. "It's okay, John, we'll find somewhere to hide."
"You named your bull John?" Brynn asked. She grinned and stepped up. "Cool! I've never seen a cow. What's he like?" she asked. Jason frowned. "Dead, if we don't get him out of here."
Valerie frowned and crossed her arms. "When you don't need her, she's there. When you do need her, she's gone."
In a puff of more green smoke, Delilah appeared in front of them. She coughed and waved it away. "Ahem. To get home, you have to finish all of the stories, not just run into them. You are familiar with Billy Beg, correct?"
"Yup!" Valerie said. She turned to Jason. "Spoiler, he dies."
Jason covered his bull's ears. "Don't listen to him, John," he said. John mooed a few more times.
"I know, but she doesn't know everything."
Sally stared at the ground. "This is so demeaning," she muttered, then looked at Christie. "I'm listening to a boy, talk to a cow, about whether the cow's going to die or not."
"It is strange, isn't it?" Laura said. "But I've seen worse."
She looked at her brother pointedly.
"Hey!" Ben exclaimed, pointing a finger at Delilah. "It was her fault!"
Delilah raised her hand. "I could turn you back into a wolf with the flick of my wrist," she retorted, waving her hand. Purple smoke cleared, and she was gone.
"Where'd she go?" Raymond asked quizzically. Valerie took in a breath. "Sightseeing," she sighed.
"AAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHH!"
They all turned around. Valerie let out a snort.
"Not funny!" Ben exclaimed, growling at them. He was a wolf again. "I thought it was just a threat!"
"Well, she did flick her wrist," Laura said. "In case you didn't notice."
"I didn't care!"
Spencer grinned. "I'm human again!" he exclaimed. Everyone turned to look at him.
"Umm..." Sally began, trying to figure out what to say. "Look behind you."
"AAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHH! I've got wings!"
"That's actually kinda cool," Laura said. "Can you fly?"
"No!"
"Okay, less cool."
Spencer frowned. "So now what are we supposed to do?" he asked. Valerie turned and looked at Jason. "If I last remember, you and the bull-"
"Ahem."
"Pardon me, you and John, need to go fight a bull in the woods."
"Ooh, John is really good at fighting. What woods?"
"The Woods of No Return."
"Nope, nevermind. We're doomed."
As Jason and John sat, cowering for their lives, Valerie continued to wonder if she would ever get home.
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