A Flash back of a Stay Cat (Part 1) (Side story)
"Sophie! Mina!" Mother. Her eyes had rings under them, and crow's feet pulling at the corners with age. Her black hair, a match of our own, was chopped short to her chin. Her blue eyes were in a set glare toward Mina and I as we hovered over a stray kitten in the house.
It was in my room that we were going to hide it. A poor lost little tabby kitten sitting under the shelter of a porch during a rainy day was what we had found then. It mewed quietly out of hunger, calling us with its bright catty eyes. The thought of it dying of starvation was hard to ignore, so on that day we had brought it home.
"We can't feed a stray! We can barely feed ourselves!"
She made us get rid of it. She sent us outside and she watched us set the creature down and turn our backs on it. We had given up on saving the kitten. Or so she had initially believed.
- For the Cause -
The days moved on, but the numbness I felt made them blur together and move slowly. I did not have the motivation that I possessed when I was first tasked in joining the scouts and so most of my days were spent in an unprogressive sort of solitude.
This continued on until the day we would depart for the outside. It wasn't an actual mission, or so I was told. The commander simply wanted to take us out for experience, and so that what we would do. The sun was still hidden under the horizon, and the sky was dark when I arrived at the meeting room where Levi explained the position everyone would be in. Only the leaders of the sections we were separated into were present here; everyone else was getting ready for the expedition.
The meeting room was a tight fit around a large square table dimly lit by a gas-lantern sitting atop the map taped to the wood surface. The faces lit by the faint light looked ghostly and sallow, there was fear among even the high ranking soldiers, but that didn't completely surprise me. What did surprise me- however- was my position within the guard. I was posted in the back center with the Corporal and his team, which included the cursed titan that was hidden in a human's skin. Eren Jeager. This part of the guard was in charge of Eren's safety and was the safest place to be in the whole formation.
Why did that make me so angry? Was it the fact that I had to work closer to this titan? That I had to help protect him? Or that while actual humans were on the outer edges fighting for their lives, he was on the inside of the formation away from the action and hiding within their protection?
I made an effort to listen to the plans, but they were very vague and I was having a hard time concentrating with all of these raging thoughts clouding my mind. I still haven't found out what became of Mina's remains. Were there any remains at all?
What would I tell mother? Father? My heart clenched painfully and I missed the rest of what Levi was explaining. Before I knew it he had already dismissed everyone and we were going to our respective places.
"Are you okay, dear?" Hanji Zoe. Her hair was brown and tied up, and she wore special glasses that were strapped around her head so that they wouldn't fall off during battle. From what I knew she was incredibly intelligent, and one of the scouting legion's greatest assets, both as a scientist and a combatant.
"Yes," I lied. Physically I was well. Nothing hurt, I wasn't even sore from my training anymore. However, my heart- it ached. I felt as I if I had been betrayed by humanity, not just once, but multiple times. Now I was leaving the safety of the walls against my will to protect a titan! I was not okay.
"I see," She smiled slightly, kindly, "well do your best out there- we will be safe within the walls in no time don't you worry." Her reassurance wasn't exactly what I was searching for, but for some reason my spirits lifted. Just a little.
I mounted a brown horse that was issued to me that morning. He wasn't named from what I knew, so half-heartedly, I nicknamed him "Free". Free was equipped with a cheap leather saddle, a bridal, and many small leather saddle bags holding emergency medical supplies. Free and I joined the line-up as soon as we were ready to go.
All of us soldiers began to move out shortly after; most of us on horseback. We walked through the towns between us and toward the nearest gate, attracting the attention of the villagers as we passed, overhearing excited and angry whispers- most of us ignored it. In that time I was alone with my thoughts as I stared at Free's twitching ears and Eren Jeager's back. I did not dare move any closer to him than I had to. I was afraid of him and I didn't want to be near him when he decided to quit the human-façade. I would not be his victim.
The buildings gradually looked more barren as we traversed nearer to the wall. There, there was a gate, large and imposing, and closed tightly. The gate to the area of land humans had lost. Curiosity burned throughout the ranks of soldiers as we rode on, and the gate slowly lifted as the Garrison forces saw us approaching. It was all clear to leave the safety of the walls, but the safety could not be guaranteed later on, and all of us knew that.
Someone was crying up ahead. It was out of fear, yet they made no move to turn around. It would be treason if they did. I wondered if they would be killed for deciding to turn back now. That's what I wanted to do, but I didn't dare even turn my head.
Outside the wall the land was quiet except for the constant pounding of the horses hooves on the soil. The warm sun was harsh to the eyes, but bearable in the early hours of the morning. The soldiers gradually spread out into their groups, strategically placed miles apart from each other.
Where we were heading seemed to be on the whims of a single man; Commander Irvin, and from what I heard not much was known about his plans thus far- not even by the higher ranking soldiers. I wondered briefly if Corporal Levi knew, I snuck a glance over at him from the corner of my eye. His face was the same as always. He looked like he was sulking; it was like he was angry or tired, but I couldn't tell since he always wore the same expression.
"What is it?" He asked without looking toward me. His dark eyes were focused straight ahead in a disinterested mask.
"Ah- Nothing." I mumbled feeling a bit ashamed for my staring. I looked down at the reigns in my hands realizing for once how little there was to actually look at. The plains were without many trees or animals, and the open field of grass was getting rather repetitive to watch.
Then that's when I realized that strangeness of it all. Where were the titans?
Were the groups stationed at the edges of the formation miles away seeing any of the titans? I hoped not; if the whole expedition went along this perfectly then I might be able to rethink my initial fears of the scouting regiment. It actually was starting to feel like a simpler job.
Oh how naïve that thought really was.
The ground rumbled then and the peace within my mind was shattered like glass. A chill ran up my spine even though there was no sign of a single titan, I was still afraid- since I knew that only a titan could make the land shake in fear in such a violent shockwave of power like that.
I am sorry for the amount of time it took to post this update. You know what brought about this release? I got two messages in my email from people who liked my story.. It was very heartwarming a nice to read. It brought me back into the spirit of writing and motivated me greatly. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I love feedback – favorites – follows, and long emails J and because I love these things so much, I will dedicate my next chapter to the next person to review no matter what, good or bad. Thanks for being such patient and great readers- I appreciate every one of you, even to the readers who simply wish to read the story- all of you thanks for the support!
-Stay frozen
~ArcticCircle
