Chapter Eight
Bella POV
Saturday. Thank goodness.
The first break from the weekday usually meant a day outside the house, possible on the streets, and then a hesitant reappearance on Sunday afternoon. I drag myself off the desk and stretch out my back, sore from being bent over the whole night. The weather isn't terrible, so I pick up my bag and head for the forested area of town.
Not a terrible day, sure, but its still humid. By the time I get to a place between the trees where I can take a sat, my skin is covered with a thin layer of moisture. I pull my hoodie off; This is one of the few places where its okay to wear short sleeves. The isolation here is the reason why I frequent the forest. Its weird to want to be alone when you're alone most of the time, but this sort of loneliness feels oddly protective.
Lying down on my jacket, I turn over and dig through my backpack for my blades. I don't actually mean to cut...its just comforting to have the blades- and the option- near me. When a few minutes of searching turns up with nothing, I start to worry.
I've always kept my blades in my backpack, and after I take them out I replace them right away. I'm not a big enough idiot to have misplaced them, so that one was impossible. What if someone took them? God knows how many rumours there are around school. Okay, fine, mainly two: That I'm a junkie, and that I'm a prostitute. But if someone caught a glimpse of my arms by accident, or went through my bag for proof...
Fuck my life. Why does this have to happen?
I throw myself back against the damp grass in a ridiculous fit of frustration and panic. Its one thing to lose a package of blades out of carelessness and have to waste money replacing them. It was entirely another to have to worry about the entire school, and possibly Charlie as well, find out that you're a demented, masochistic freak.
Because why wouldn't they think so? Heaven knows how much more I'd prefer "slut" as a title.
Sitting back up, I run my fingers down the scars that cover the inside of my left arm, then start to pick absently at a scab from the previous morning. Right now I wish that I could just stay here forever, away from the assholes at school, away from Charlie, with absolutely nothing to remind me of what a mess my life has turned into.
Except for the marks on my skin. Except for these cuts that have grown too numerous for me to count, that keep on healing and reappearing, unlike the feelings that put them there.
Those always stay the same.
A small sound makes turn, and as a rapid afterthought I hide my arms. With a bit of dismay I realize that someone else is in the forest. Without bothering to find out who it is I jump up, intending to leave. Then I look down at the scattered contents of my backpack and groan inwardly. My things are all over the grass, and will probably take an eternity to pick up.
"Need some help with that?" Turning around again finds me face to face with the boy who spoke to me in the hallway yesterday.
"Uh, thanks." I stammer awkwardly. "Your name is Edward, right?" Well done, Bella. That sounds so much better than "what the heck are you doing here" or "what is up with your superhuman siblings".
I get a nod in return. Kneeling down, I start to clumsily dump my stuff back into my bag. Edward scoops stuff up far more quickly than I do, managing to replace more than half of my things before I've gotten barely an armful in.
"Theres hardly anyone around here in the mornings."
I glance up, wondering if that was just a rewording of the more blunt "what are you doing here".
"Thats...why I come here. For the quiet." My voice seems to match my words perfectly. Then I forge on, hoping that I haven't unintentionally implied that he'd disturbed me. "You have siblings, right? You would probably understand."
Edward chuckles softly. "Of course." Then he pauses, turning an oddly scrutinizing look on me. "Aren't you an only child?"
I raise my eyebrows. "Well, yes, but..." I trail off, confused. "How on earth do you know that?"
He smiles, half apologetic, half defensive. "I thought it was common knowledge."
"Oh." I blush, feeling stupid and looking down at my feet. When I find Edward following my downwards gaze I remember with alarm that my arms are bare. After casting a panicky look at my hoodie, which is still on the ground, I back away slightly and snatch up my bag, preparing to make a run for it. Not that it would likely make that much of a difference. With my shitty luck the whole school would know by Monday.
"I have to go. Sorry." With a half-hearted, likely indistinguishable mumble, I throw my jacket on and dash out of the woods without a second glance behind me.
Okay, dear readers. I know that you all want me to make my chapters longer. And I'll try, but sadly that's a double edged request. Longer chapters mean longer wait times between chapters. Thank you all so much for the encouragement (all ye unnamed Guests XD) and the great input. Especially LillyZ and Grimfwaters (hope you don't mind me mentioning you..) for the ideas! Speaking of which, I will always be in need of :P
