Author's Note:Hey, y'all!
So this chapter has smut in it...three times...cause I'm a thirsty hoe and I can't be quenched. Also this chapter is one that I've been thinking about since starting the fic so I'm happy to have finally wrote it out. That's also why it's almost 10,000 words long, I just wanted it to be perfect.
I hope you enjoy and please review, favorite, and follow, and let me know what you think.
Chapter 9: I will mend you
Jacob Seed
April 13, 2012 – 7:09 PM
"Will you just relax?"
Mercy sits in the passenger seat of his truck, leg bouncing anxiously as she looks out the window. A baking dish with a chicken broccoli casserole sits in the seat between them, covered with tin foil and preventing that heavenly smell her cooking always gives off from filling the truck.
She'd practically begged Jacob to bring her out to dinner tonight so that she could meet his family, and now he has half a mind to turn around and take them home, she's so nervous. First, she'd struggled with finding the perfect dish to bring even though he'd assured her that she could make anything, and they'd like it just fine. Then she'd made him sit and watch as she'd tried on different dresses, getting frustrated when he said every single one of them was acceptable. She'd finally settled on a simple dress the color of wine with sleeves that hang down her shoulders, shoulders he wants to sink his teeth in and mark as his right now.
Now, she's asking him question upon question about his brothers and Faith. "What if they don't like me?"
"Why do you care if they like you?" he asks. She is his. She shouldn't be worrying about whether or not his family approves of her. He'll keep her regardless.
"Because they're your family," she says, turning to him and raising an eyebrow as if that answer was obvious. "And if I know anything abut dating and relationships and that kind of stuff, it's that these kinds of things are important. If they hate me, it's all over."
He really thinks she worries too much, but he can't help but be worried too. Jacob isn't heavily experienced with any of the intimate details of…whatever this is between them. Even sex. Intimacy had been something he didn't want to have anything to do with. He wasn't concerned with kissing just to kiss or exploring the other's body to find what they enjoyed or even holding each other after it all. Before Mercy, there'd only been maybe a handful of other women and even then, most of his life was spent alone with his hand. Sex had always been cold, with the only goal being a short moment of calm before the storm started back up again.
Not with Mercy, though.
With Mercy it's all soft moans and gentle touches and loving gazes that make his head spin. He hadn't known how intense sex could feel until that first night he'd slept with her, how utterly complete he could feel. He wants more of it with her, hadn't realized that's what he's been craving his whole life. And no matter what, he can't shake the feeling that tonight is the beginning of the end. That somehow presenting her to his family, declaring her as his, will make it all too real. That she'll just disappear.
The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh.
He places a hand on her knee to still her shaking, her skin soft and smooth against the callouses of his fingers. "Well, that isn't going to happen. In fact, I can tell you what's going to happen," Jacob says as his thumb traces lazy circles against her skin. "Faith is going to love you, and she's gonna want to keep you all for herself. Joseph's going to talk to you about the Voice, because that's what he always does, and then he'll have his hand at trying to make you join the Project. And John is going to grill you about every aspect of your life, which you won't have to worry about since I'll be speaking for you all night."
He glances over to her, still staring out the window. At least her leg has stopped bouncing, but it still bothers him that she's nervous. He knows how to fix that. He pulls on her knee, gently uncrossing her legs, and slides his hand beneath her skirt and up the silky expanse of her thigh. "What are you doing?" she asks, but she still parts her legs like the good girl she is.
Jacob growls approvingly as he tucks his fingers past the mint green lace of her panties to find her velvety folds already wet for him. "Fuck, how can you think that my family won't love you when they see you?" he rasps, "Good girl like you, obedient without being told what to do."
She squeezes her thighs around his hand when he begins sliding his fingers along her slit. "Jacob, stop," Mercy says, but it only eggs him on as he pushes two fingers inside her. She sucks in a breath as her head falls back against the headrest. He takes his eyes off the road for only a second to admire her expression as she loses control. When she glares at him, her arousal burning from within her violet gaze, he smirks. "Jacob, really. We're going to eat dinner with your family. They'll know- "
He hooks his fingers, and she's cut off by her moan as she arches her spine, pulling against her seatbelt. "They'll know what? That you're mine?" He pushes into her deeper, and hums when he feels her tighten around his fingers. "Good. Because you are." Her fingers dig into the edges of her seat as he continues to work her, thrusting deeply a few times before pulling out to stroke that sensitive bundle of nerves that drives her insane when he touches.
"Go on. Be as loud as you want," he says when she lets out a soft moan, a breath that ends in a whimper. He hates how self-conscious she is sometimes, how embarrassed she gets from her body's natural reaction to pleasure. He clenches his jaw as he focuses on the road, grunting when he pushes back inside her and works her towards her orgasm.
By the time they make it to John's ranch, her legs are shaking for an entirely different reason. Jacob's quick to push himself out of the driver's side and stride over to her side while she's opening her door and pushing herself out. As she's bending over the seat to grab the baking dish, he steps behind her and presses his groin against the cushion of her ass. She sighs as she instinctually presses back against his hardness.
He hooks his arm around her waist, leaning over her to press his face against her neck and kiss her just behind her ear. "I want you," he growls, "I could fuck you right here in John's driveway."
Mercy whimpers. "As appealing as that sounds- "she moans when he nips her earlobe, "-mmm, I really don't want your brothers' and sister's first impression of me to be that girl with Jacob's semen dripping down her legs."
Jacob groans when his cock twitches from the thought. "Fuck, wouldn't it be worth it to see the look on Joseph's face?"
"No," she says simply, pushing back hard against him so she can turn herself around. She holds the casserole dish in between them almost defensively, as if that will stop him. "It wouldn't be. I want to make a good first impression."
Jacob's a little disappointed with her reaction. She isn't usually averse to having sex in odd places. Sometimes he wonders if she has a kink for it or if maybe she is that insatiable that she needs it right then and there. "Didn't realize reading a book turned you into a saint," he says, only slightly teasing. The whole reason she'd wanted to come here was because of Joseph's book. One night she'd been reading it before she went to sleep, then the next she'd told him she wanted to meet his siblings.
She raises an eyebrow, smirking wolfishly. "Would it turn you on to think of me as a saint?" She giggles as she looks up at him, gently pushing past him. She shakes her head. "C'mon, Jake. I wanna get in there before it gets any later."
She takes a few steps down the path before halting when she looks over the expanse of the property. He walks past her, thinking that she'll snap back into movement once he's passed, but she doesn't. He stops just at the top of the steps leading to the ranch's front door, turning back to her and raising an eyebrow.
"You coming?" he asks.
She shakes her head, eyes wide and the tip of her shoe scuffing against the dirt. "May…Maybe we should go?"
"We're already here, Mercy." He jerks his head in the direction of the mansion.
She looks down at her dress, rubbing her knees together. "I'm underdressed."
"No, you're not." Jacob sighs, stepping down and approaching her. He'd felt the same way when he came to the ranch the first time. He'd never set foot in a building even remotely as nice as John's place, and he was too used to a life of poverty. For a while he didn't know what he should wear to these family dinners until he'd settled on simple flannels and his usual jeans and boots.
Mercy bites her lip as he stares down at her with hot eyes. "This dress is awful," she whines.
She looks gorgeous. Her skin glows from the amber light of the setting sun. Her cheeks are still flushed from the orgasm he'd given her with his fingers, pupils blown wide from the arousal that lingers in her system. He lifts his hand and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, thumb tracing her jaw, across her chin, and tugging her bottom lip lightly. "You look fine, Pup."
He jerks his head, and she walks ahead of him to the door. He steps beside her, pressing a finger to the doorbell and hearing the consequent ring announcing their arrival. "He's a lawyer, right? And he was able to get all of this himself?" she asks, eyes glittering as she looks at him. He simply nods, caught in a strange moment of feeling pride for his brother and a spike of jealousy as she admires the outside of the mansion.
When John opens the door, his eyes light up upon seeing Jacob. Though in only milliseconds, he catches sight of Mercy, expression faltering slightly.
Jacob clears his throat, bringing John's attention back to him. "I'm sorry, brother. I'm glad you could make it, but I wasn't expecting any other guests."
"She made casserole for us," Jacob replies, as though that alone would convince John to let her join them. "It's better than anything I could bring."
Mercy holds up the casserole as an offering, and John raises an eyebrow as he looks at her then back to Jacob. "You didn't have to bring anything but thank you anyways." He steps to the side, holding a hand out to welcome them in his home. "Please, come in."
Jacob presses a hand to the small of Mercy's back to urge her forward. She takes a tentative step inside, violet gaze scanning over the décor. John's eyes follow her every move, and Jacob can't help but feel at least a little annoyed by it. His blood boils as he watches his little brother's penetrating stare glance over her form, as if she were a gift for him. If it were anyone else looking at Mercy like that, Jacob would punch his teeth in.
Mercy turns around quickly, as if she'd forgot they were there, eyes wide as she signs, "You have a very lovely home."
John blinks completely caught off guard. "Forgive me, but I don't know sign language."
"She says you have a nice place," Jacob says, his tone curt and biting. Mercy glances at him with her brows furrowed before she goes back to looking around.
When her back is turned, John leans towards him, eyes never leaving her. "What did you say her name was again?" John whispers.
I didn't, Jacob thinks, but answers anyway, "Mercy." He steps through the door and approaches Mercy. As he comes up behind her, his hand reaches to cup her ass, hoping that John will see and get the hint. As soon as he squeezes her softness, she jumps, head snapping in his directions and eyes wide. She pokes his ribs with her elbow, glancing nervously behind them. In an instant, his hand leaves her butt and snakes around her waist. He jerks his head in the direction of the dinning room, and they walk together.
Of course, Joseph and Faith are already there, waiting for Jacob to arrive. They're standing by the table, talking in hushed voices until they see the couple enter. Faith's eyes brighten immediately upon seeing Mercy, tapping Joseph's shoulder and pointing towards them. When Joseph sees her, though, he looks almost panicked, distraught, and suspicious by the sight of her. It's gone within the next second, leaving Jacob wondering if he'd just imagined it.
"Joseph, Faith," Jacob says in greeting, then he turns his attention to Mercy. "This is Mercy. She wanted to meet you. She's my…" He isn't sure what to call her. He hadn't thought this all through. He'd always hated the girlfriend/boyfriend terms. Besides, calling her his girlfriend makes it seem like there is something more serious between them. "She's my girl," he says instead.
Joseph is the first to approach her, taking slow deliberate steps. He is surprisingly silent as he takes the casserole from her hands, and Mercy watches him with wide eyes, legs shaking anxiously. Or perhaps she's still feeling the aftershocks of her orgasm. Still, she casts her eyes to the ground as he continues to stare at her and without saying a word he turns from her and goes to place the casserole with the other foods situated along the dining table. Mercy sighs quietly, seemingly disappointed with Joseph's reaction.
"Oh, honey!" Faith exclaims suddenly. She beams from ear to ear as she strides towards them. "You're the most beautiful thing that's ever graced this ranch!" John scoffs behind him as he finally joins the rest of them. Faith gives Jacob an approving glance as she gathers Mercy in a tight embrace. Mercy gasps, blush darkening as she returns the gesture. As Faith pulls back, her hands glide down Mercy's forearms to grasp at her hands in between them.
Mercy pulls back one of her hands to sign, "Thank you."
Faith's eyes widen as she lifts a hand to her lips. "Oh, my goodness! I'm so sorry." She turns to Jacob, still holding Mercy's hands. "Can she hear what I'm saying? Is she deaf?"
"She isn't deaf," Jacob answers.
Faith sighs in relief, smiling back at Mercy. "Why don't we sit down. You can sit next to me if you want."
"Faith," Joseph says, the first word he's spoken since they got there. "I'm sure Jacob wants to sit next to his…girl." The last word is spat out, as though the presence of Mercy is a sin in and of itself. Jacob's hand clenches into a fist at his side, jaw tightening. Joseph's the one always preaching about loving and accepting one another, and yet he's done nothing so far except give Mercy the cold shoulder. Jacob knows that he shouldn't care this much, that it shouldn't be affecting him the way that it is. Still, the feeling consumes him.
After they set a place for Mercy, they take their seats. Of course, John chooses to sit across from her, the better to look her in the eyes when he begins interrogating her. Faith is on John's left and Joseph's following after her at the head of the table, where he always sits. His eyes never leave Mercy, even as they begin eating, his gaze sharp and wary.
"This casserole is lovely, Mercy," John says halfway through the meal. "Surely, a woman of your talent is a chef of some sort."
"She's a deputy," Jacob answers for her.
John raises a brow as he looks at his brother. "Really? I thought I'd met everyone down at the sheriff's department, but I guess I must've missed one." He looks back at Mercy. "Have you always lived in Hope County?"
"She's from Maryland."
"Maryland." John repeats, keeping his gaze on Mercy as she nods, a small smile playing at her lips from his attention. John has always been the most handsome out of the three brothers, and Jacob can't help the jealousy that courses through him as she continues to keep her gaze locked with his little brother. He reaches next to him to hold her knee possessively. "You've certainly come a long way from home. What brought you all the way out to this backwater County?"
"I bought her," Jacob says, and Mercy immediately starts coughing next to him. He has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smirking as Joseph glares disappointingly at him.
Faith leans forward so that she can capture everyone's attention. "Well, I think she's lovely."
"Yes, I wouldn't expect someone of her…station to be quite so disarming," John says, and Jacob scowls at him. But his little brother ignores it. "Maybe I should look into ordering one just like her."
"Maybe you should," Jacob growls, stabbing his fork into his food. He squeezes Mercy's knee, hearing her wince beside him from the death grip he has her in. John smirks seemingly amused by what's transpiring and it only serves to piss Jacob off more. Faith saves them from the tense silence that follows, talking to Mercy about the new flowers she's tying to grow at the Conservatory through genetic engineering. She doesn't seem to truly understand what the young girl's talking about, but he's glad her attention isn't on John anymore.
"Sister, perhaps Mercy would like to take a walk around the ranch," Joseph says as the plates are being cleared off the table.
Faith smiles, eyes shining as she stands and makes her way around the table. "Of course!" She grasps Mercy's hand and pulls her up from her seat. "We'll leave the men to talk while I show you around." Faith hooks her arm around hers as they walk towards the back door. "This place is so beautiful, you'll love it," he hears Faith say as they leave.
When her voice has gotten far enough away, Joseph says, "What were you thinking bringing her here?"
Jacob glares at his brother, and John looks between the two, raising a brow. "She read that damn book of yours and begged me to meet you. The only reason I brought her out here was because she wouldn't shut up about it."
"Do you even know who she is?" Joseph asks, as though he already knows her completely. That doesn't sit well with Jacob.
"She's no one you need to worry about," Jacob answers.
"Are you so sure?"
"I keep her in check," he barks, hands clenching into fists on his knees.
"You treat her like she's a wild animal," John says, leaning back in his chair and resting his head on his knuckles.
"Oh, she is," Jacob rumbles, "Especially, when I'm fucking her."
John narrows his eyes at his older brother.
"And this…relationship you have with her," Joseph starts, ignoring Jacob's crude wording, "does it go beyond these baser desires?"
Jacob fixes a cold stare as he looks at Joseph. What does his brother expect him to say? That he only feels whole when he's inside her? That she's the only thing that keeps the nightmares at bay? That simply being in her presence makes him forget about the cruel world they live in? That even when he's not with her, she plagues his mind with her memory? That she is sweeter than any vice, and she is the only drug he'll ever indulge in? He can't tell Joseph any of it, no matter how true it is. It is more than he wants anyone to know about him, even Mercy. Especially Mercy.
"It doesn't matter," Jacob says.
Joseph glances down to the table, then back to Jacob. "Is she joining our flock?" Joseph asks, "She will need to be cleansed of her sin."
John perks up from that, and it only makes Jacob angry. "Over my dead body," he growls.
Joseph furrows his brows. "She cannot be a part of our Family otherwise."
"I don't care. She is mine." He will not let her be used by his family. Will not let his little brother mark her. The only marks he'll allow are the scars left behind from him biting her, bruises his fingers imprint into her skin. "And I'm not going to stop seeing her."
Joseph's irises dance about, seemingly contemplating Jacob's stance. "Very well," Joseph says, standing abruptly and making his way to the door.
"Where are you going?"
Joseph turns back, azure eyes meeting his own. "I wish to speak with her, at least. Is that not why she came here?" Jacob stands from his chair, clenching and unclenching his fists at his sides. "Will you allow me to speak with her, Jacob?"
Jacob lets out a long tense breath, nodding slightly. He takes his seat again as Joseph walks out in search of Faith and Mercy. He and John are left alone, and John watches him, finger tapping against the hardwood of the table.
"Did you really buy her?" John asks.
Jacob doesn't answer him.
Mercy Greco
April 13, 2012 – 8:15 PM
"Oh, I love springtime in Hope County," Faith sighs as they walk, "It's a beautiful thing watching all the flowers bloom after being dormant for so long, plus the air is calmer and fresher. Wouldn't you agree?"
Mercy nods as the young girl looks at her expectantly. She must be barely eighteen, Mercy guesses from the way she holds herself. It is painfully obvious to Mercy that she is not related to any of the Seed brothers, though. Brown hair so light it could be mistaken for blonde. Green-blue eyes that glitter like emeralds, so unlike the clear blue of her brothers'. Everything else about her face looks different from them as well, the structure sculpted differently from theirs. Mercy had been expecting that, though. The book hadn't even mentioned her 'til the end, spoke as though she'd just appeared in their life one day, and Jacob told her that he doesn't consider Faith as part of his family.
Faith holds Mercy's hands within both her own as she connects their gazes. "You know, I'm really happy that Jacob found you," she says, and Mercy can tell that she means it. Her heart skips a beat. She is glad at least one sibling has accepted her. Joseph has been so cold since meeting her, and John doesn't seem to care that she's there. She can't help but feel a little disappointed from it all.
Faith cups Mercy's cheek, thumb lightly caressing her cheekbone. "You're sad," Faith says, her voice featherlight. Mercy widens her eyes a little. She hadn't meant to give away any indication of that. "It's okay. We're all sad: John and Jacob, even Joseph is sad sometimes." She smiles. "I'm so thankful that you're with Jacob, though. Most people are scared of him, but not you. You look him in the eyes."
She turns around and takes a few more steps down the dirt path, holding Mercy's hand as though it were glass. Then she turns back around. "Did you know that's where the love comes from? Through the eyes. Joseph told me that. He said I should always look a person in the eyes when I'm speaking to them, to show them my love." Mercy can feel it too, every time the girl looks at her. Faith giggles. "That's why I'm glad you look Jacob in the eyes. He deserves to feel so much love." Mercy nods in agreement, and Faith giggles again, leaning forward to press their foreheads together. It is an affectionate gesture, one that Mercy hadn't been expecting. Her eyes tear up from it.
Faith gasps, pressing her hand over her heart. "I'm sorry. I'm making you sad, aren't I? I know I can be a little much sometimes." Mercy shakes her head quickly to reassure the young woman, wiping away her tears with a forefinger. Faith smiles, close-lipped. "I don't know if you have a voice, but if you do, I want you to know that you can talk to me about anything, and it'll be just between us. We're sisters now, you and I."
"Are you trying to steal away Jacob's girl, Faith?" Mercy jumps when she hears Joseph's voice, turning around quickly to face him, hands smoothing down her skirt.
Faith walks past her taking Joseph's hand within her own. "She's wonderful, Joseph. Jacob's so lucky to have found someone like her."
Joseph brings her hand to his lips, lightly pressing a kiss to her knuckle. He releases his sister's hand, looking back to Mercy. He holds a hand out to her. "Come here, child."
Mercy can feel her legs shaking again as she hesitantly goes to him. He is almost as tall as Jacob, still the slightly smaller height does little to make him feel less daunting as he looks down at her. He tenderly grasps her shoulders, and she is surprised to feel how warm he is, despite how stony he'd been all night.
"Jacob has always been a fighter," Joseph says, "When he was young he fought our father. He fought in the Gulf War. He fights with me now, but there's also a different battle he's fighting. One within himself." She keeps her gaze fixed on his, and Mercy can feel it. That's where the love comes from. "I can see a hurt in you too. A similar fight, though not quite the same.
"I see relationships like yours often. Two broken people, coming together to try and fix each other." He closes his eyes a moment and lets out a slow breath before opening them again. "It doesn't work often, and it can be damaging when it doesn't. How does a broken thing fix something it does not know how to, after all?" Mercy looks to the ground to her feet, but Joseph grasps her chin softly between thumb and forefinger, lifting her gaze back to his. "But I can show you how. You can be healed through me, but you have to let me."
Mercy feels the familiar sting of tears behind her eyes, blurring her vision as they form at her waterline. Isn't that why she'd begged Jacob to bring her here? So that she could be healed? The guilt swirls endlessly in her mind, a tornado of shame and torment all coming together to form a deadly cocktail of melancholy. She thinks of her dad, how she'd let him die in that corner store. Her grandmother, who could never be cured no matter what Mercy tried. She even thinks on her mother, who'd died bringing into this world. This world she'd never asked to be a part of. This world that gives only to take away.
But how does she say all this to Joseph?
"I…uh…I…" she tries, but her throat is dry and closing up.
"I will not force you to speak," Joseph says, taking her hands in his. He looks down to their joined hands, examining hers like they are the most precious things in the world. "Let your hands form the words, and God will make them clear for me."
Mercy's not even sure if she believes that, but still she signs. She tells him everything, weaves her remorse in front of him with her hands. She is sure that it is a dingy garment, filthy and rotten from her sins. Yet with the way he watches her, it could very well be an elegant robe of many colors woven from the finest silk. Though her anxieties are peaked within her, she does not cry, stills her hands of their shaking while she signs. And when it is all through, he does not look disappointed or disgusted with her as she'd inwardly expected. Well, perhaps she hadn't been expecting that. He'd written in his book about acceptance and love, why should her story be any different from the others he's heard.
Joseph lifts a hand to fold a stray piece of hair behind her ear before trailing his hands down her arms to take her hands within his own. "These wounds that have hurt you for so long, I can heal them, but you must listen to me. You must hear what I say before this war inside you can settle, even if you hate the words that leave my lips.
"Your father, your mother, your grandmother. You must listen, you must hear me." Mercy swallows thickly, stomach clenching unpleasantly in anticipation of what he'll say. "Mercy, none of it was your fault." Her eyes widen as the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding leaves her. "It was not your fault." She screws her eyes shut, tears streaking down her face as she shakes her head slowly. He is lying to me, she thinks, All of this is wrong. "You need to let it go. You need to forgive yourself."
She squeezes her lids shut tighter, though the tears still fall. She signs, hands shaking so bad she is sure that he can't see what she's saying, "I stayed in the closet like a coward while my dad was killed."
"You were a child."
"I never did enough for my grandmother."
"There was nothing you could've done."
"I ripped my mother apart."
"It wasn't your fault, Mercy."
Mercy sobs loudly as she presses her face into Joseph's chest, clutching at his vest as she cries. He gently cups her shoulders, the heat of his fingers on her skin scorching her heart. Arms wrap around her waist from behind, and she hears Faith's happy sigh as she presses her cheek against Mercy's back. Mercy had completely forgotten the young woman is with them, but she doesn't feel embarrassed as her sobbing continues. All she feels is warmth, love consuming her heavy soul.
She's completely drained and exhausted when they finally make it back to the ranch. Jacob and John are waiting outside for them. Jacob walks over as soon as he sees her, glancing suspiciously between Faith and Joseph.
"You ready to go home?" Jacob asks as Mercy looks up at him with hooded eyes, still red and puffy from crying. She nods slowly as John joins them.
"It was a pleasure to meet you, Mercy," John says, grasping her offered hand within both of his. He squeezes her hand a little too hard for comfort, but she's so out of it she doesn't care. "Hopefully our paths will cross again in the near future."
Faith comes to her next. She wraps her arms tightly around Mercy's shoulders, only adding to the burning she feels pulsing inside her. When she pulls away, Faith gives her the most radiant smile Mercy's ever seen.
Finally, Joseph takes her hands and lightly presses his forehead against her own. "Remember what I told you," he whispers. When he pulls back, he lifts his hand to lightly stroke her cheek before releasing her and gesturing for Jacob to come to him. "Can I speak to you before you go?"
Thinking that they wish to speak in private, Mercy makes her way to Jacob's truck. Waiting in the silence of the truck helps in soothing her nerves a little as she stares out the window over the hazy expanse of the mansion. It is not long before Jacob slides into the driver's side and pulls out of John's driveway.
"What did Joseph talk to you about?" Jacob asks when they're well away from the ranch.
She stares out the window as she replies, "We talked about my family."
Jacob hums. She hopes that he won't press her for more details, not that he does that normally anyway. He usually just lets her do all the talking. She's so emotionally drained, though. "He didn't ask you to do anything for him?" he asks a few beats later, his voice rumbling dangerously.
She raises an eyebrow at his tone, turning her head slightly so she can look at him from the corner of her eye. "No. Why would he?"
He doesn't answer her question, instead asking yet another. "And you didn't tell Faith anything?"
"How would I?" Mercy questions, turning her body fully towards Jacob now. He is silent as they continue on their way home. She doesn't understand what's made him so edgy today. He'd been particularly handsy with her all throughout the day, taking any chance he could to touch her and have sex with her. Not that she minds. Still, she could tell that something was bothering him, even now. She doesn't understand why he's still nervous. She'd thought dinner had gone well, aside from when he'd lied to his siblings about her being an escort. She'll have to have a talk with him about that later.
When they make it home, she's the first to jump out of the truck, heading up the path and into his cabin. As she's starting up a pot of coffee, hands tighten around her hips and press her hard against the counter, stealing the breath from her lungs. She whips her head around, scream dying in the back of her throat when she sees Jacob behind her.
She presses a hand against her heart, beating erratically beneath her fingers. "Jacob, you scared the life out of me."
"You have a good time at dinner?" he asks, his tone reverberating against her spine. Something about it bothers her, and she tries to turn her head to get a better look at him. He only pushes her harder against the counter.
"Yes," she answers honestly. Though there were some things that'd upset her, she thinks it had ended on a rather happier note than where the night had begun. She trembles as Jacob's teeth ghost over the sensitive skin at the nape of her neck. She can't help the arousal igniting in her core, despite how confused she is with his line of questioning.
"John wants you," he snarls, one of his hands snaking around her waist to knead her breast through the fabric of her dress. Her body reacts immediately to his touch, back arching against him, but her thoughts stall on his words.
"What do you mean?" she asks, breathlessly.
"I mean that my pretty boy baby brother wants to fuck my girl," he growls as he nips the shell of her ear. Mercy widens her eyes, fuming from what he's saying. When he lifts her skirt, though, hand leaving her breast to stroke her through her panties, she forgets why she should be mad at him for a moment. "My girl," he emphasizes, moving her panties aside to dip into her wetness.
"Jake," she breathes, crying out when he rubs her clit in circular motions. "I don't think- "She moans when he pushes a single finger inside her. He pulls out of her a second later, making her whine as he pushes her legs farther apart with his knees. "Jacob," she tries again. He presses hard against her shoulders when she tries to turn around again. She can hear him fumbling with his belt behind her.
"You're my girl, dammit," he says, lining the head of his cock with her entrance and surging fully inside her. Mercy moans low in her throat as the position allows him to go deeper. "Mine, you got that?" He slams into her again and again, not giving her any time to adjust to him or letting her move against him to find her own pleasure. "No one else can have you. Say it," he snarls on a particularly harsh thrust. "Say that you're mine." She's so confused with everything that's happening right now. She's caught between the pleasure he's giving her and her anger from him using her in this way, with no time to filter and distinguish between the two. Her throat closes up as he continues to thrust ruthlessly into her.
Jacob smacks her ass hard, and she whimpers when he slams into her. With the way he's pressing her in the counter, she knows she'll have some nasty bruises left over from this. "Say it, Mercy."
"Y-Yours," she forces out. He groans, thrusting into her once more before spilling inside her.
"Fuck yeah, you're mine," he whispers against her ear, and a blinding rage overtakes her as she shoves herself away from the counter with every ounce of strength she can muster. She gets him to move off her, and as she's readjusting her skirt, she turns and slaps him across his cheek as hard as she can. Her palm stings from the impact, and she can already see the area reddening, but she doesn't feel guilty. She storms past him, out the door, and to her own cabin.
She slams and locks the door before leaning back against it and crying into her hands. She is thankful that Jacob hasn't come knocking, not wanting him to see her cry. She's having trouble catching her breath, and her entire body is shaking she's so angry with him.
Later in the night when sleep evades her, Mercy hears the familiar heavy footfalls of Jacob lumbering up the steps of her porch. She knows what he's here for. Before they'd been comfortable enough to just spend the night with each other, they used to just go to the other's cabin during the night in case of nightmares. Mercy throws the covers off herself and swings her legs off the bed. If he thinks he can just waltz on in here and expect her to give him affection after the shit he pulled, he's got another thing coming.
She stomps to the door and jerks it open just as he's about to unlock it with his key. She suppresses the urge to feel sad for him as she crosses her arms over her chest and leans against the framing of the door. The area around his eyes is so dark, darker than normal, and his hair is in complete disarray. She can just barely see the sheen of sweat all over his face and chest as he stands on her porch in just a pair of pajama bottoms. This nightmare must've been a brutal thing, but she will not falter.
Jacob sighs as he looks down at her, hand coming up to massage the back of his neck. "I don't understand what your problem is," he says.
"You don't?" she scoffs, disgusted. "Jacob, you fucked me like I was just some whore. Is that what I am to you? Is that why you told your family I'm an escort? To claim me? Why would you even think I'd turn on you for some pretty boy with a mansion? I have given you all of my trust, and you spit it back in my face."
He pinches the bridge of his nose as he squeezes his eyes shut. "If you don't like it, then no one's stopping you from leaving."
"You're not pulling this shit on me. I don't want anyone else," Mercy says emphatically. "Why don't you believe that? Don't you want me?"
"What do you want from me, Mercy?" he growls, eyes snapping open and face going red from anger. "Do you want me to spill my heart out to you or something? I'm not built like that. I'm not meant for anything you're wanting." Her heart aches for him. The warped vision he has of himself tickles the edges of her sight with the urge to cry. She wishes he could see himself the way she does.
"Can't you see that I don't want someone else?" She steps out of the doorway towards him. She places her hand on his chest, fingers tangling within the sparse hair there. "I want you, Jacob. The you who sat with me by the bonfire all those nights, letting me seek comfort in you. The you who went with me to Maryland so I could say my last goodbyes." Her hand trails up his chest, past his neck, and to his cheek. "The you I'm falling in love with." His eyes instantly widen at her words, the first time she's ever seen Jacob look panicked and it's because she told him she loves him. He grips her wrist tight, looking as though he wants to pull her hand away, but she can feel him lean into her touch slightly.
"Jake, it's alright." She smiles even though his reaction makes her heart drop. "You don't have to say a thing." She stands on her tip toes to place a chaste kiss on his chin, then again on his lips. "But now I think I should claim you." He doesn't say anything in protest as she gently takes his hand in hers and leads him into the cabin towards her bed. She kneels at the foot of the bed in front of him, trailing her fingers up and down his torso. "Do you trust me, Jacob?" she asks, barely above a whisper as she grazes her lips against a scar just above his heart. His chest billows as he breathes heavily.
He doesn't answer her, but she smiles to herself when she sees him nod. He might not love her and may never, but she knows that he cares for her.
"Good." She presses her lips against his chest more firmly. "Let me love you, Jacob." She takes her time in kissing each and every scar on his chest, not wanting to miss a single one. She wants to possess him as he'd done to her. He groans when she licks a jagged scar beneath his hipbone, his fingers burying themselves in her hair.
"Take your pants off," she commands, scooting back to the headboard as she pulls her shirt over her head. She's left in nothing but her panties as she throws the shirt somewhere in the vicinity. As soon as Jacob pulls his pants off (Unsurprisingly, he's gone commando.), he crawls over her and kisses her until the breath leaves her lungs. This is not what she wants, though. She presses her palms against his chest, shoving him away from her.
"No," she says as she smirks, "It's my turn." She pushes him onto his back, throwing her thigh over his legs so that she's straddling him. His cock is standing tall between them, her mouth watering from the size of him. The first time she'd seen it, she'd been worried that it wouldn't fit inside her. But it had, and oh how he can hit her in all the right places.
Mercy bites her lip as she runs her palm lightly up the length of him. She watches in awe as his body tightens from her touch, jaw locking as he stares at her with dark eyes. She pulls down his foreskin, thumb smoothing a bead of precum all along his head. She smirks as she meets his gaze, squeezing him gently. His mouth falls open with a silent moan, his head falling back against the pillows.
She squeezes him again, completely entranced by his and her reactions. She likes having this power over Jacob, likes how he comes apart just from her touch. She tightens her hand around him, moving it up and down as he begins thrusting in time with her. She tenderly cups the heavy sacs beneath the base of him, and he tilts his head back down to watch her. His hands are pawing at her, grabbing her breasts and kneading them, toying with her nipples. She meets his lust-filled stare with her own. His mouth has fallen open slightly, his cheeks flushed with color, and he looks absolutely stunning.
He groans, stopping his hips from moving, and she knows he's about to come. And as spectacular as it is to watch this big, powerful man peak, it isn't something she wants. Not yet. He'd already found his release earlier when she had not. She wants them to do it together this time.
"Are you going to wait for me this time?" Mercy teases, halting in her ministrations. He sits up so that he can trail open-mouthed kisses along her throat and collarbones.
"I'm sorry," he rasps, and she finds herself surprised. Jacob Seed is not a man that apologizes for anything he does. She grasps his face in her hands, pulling him away from her so she can meet his gaze.
"I won't let you do that to me again," she warns. "If we fuck, we'll do it to bring pleasure to both of us, and to strengthen the bond we share." Jacob nods, pupils dilated as he turns his face to kiss her palm and then her wrist.
"Take these off," he says as he tugs down on the waistband of her panties. She lifts herself off him so that she can take them off the rest of the way before lowering back down onto him. She sighs when she feels his hardness press against her wet and aching core, rolling her hips against him.
"Jacob," she moans, placing her hands on his chest. The hardness of him feels wonderful in this position, and she can even feel her folds pulsing and fluttering against him. He smirks, sliding his hands up her thighs and to her hips. His grip is deliciously bruising as he guides the rocking of her hips, sliding her along his length. She whimpers from the friction, nails digging into the flesh of his chest. It feels so good, but it isn't enough.
She lifts herself up on her knees, and one of his hands leaves her hip to grasp his cock so he can hold himself up for her. She shifts a little more until he's lined up with her entrance. She sinks down on him until he's completely sheathed inside her, back arching from the feeling. She blinks her eyes open and looks down at him only to find him watching her intently, his face and body tense beneath her. She leans forward so that she can kiss him, the angle causing her to moan against his mouth.
"I love you, Jacob," she whispers so softly as she starts to move. He screws his eyes shut as if hurt by her words as he threads and tangles his fingers in her hair.
"Look at me," she says, her voice taking on a more pleading tone. I will make him feel my love. She begins moving against him with more purpose. He opens his eyes to meet hers, keeping his expression carefully blank. She is sad to admit that she doesn't know much about his life. She hadn't read anything about him in the Book of Joseph, and he is extremely guarded when talking about anything from his past. She knows that he won't be able to accept her love easily, and it will be even harder for him to give it. But right now, she doesn't mind so much. She will continue to love him, deeply, intensely, and one day he will learn. Maybe when that time comes he will love her too.
"I love you, Jake," she says again. She cries out as her body draws closer and closer to her release. "I am yours." She reaches out, cupping his cheek in her hand, her thumb tracing over his bottom lip. "And you are mine." He shoots up, wrapping an arm around her waist and helping her move faster against him, the other hand coming up to grip her thigh. He nips at her lip, making her gasp, and giving him the opportunity to kiss her so deeply, so ferociously that her head is spinning. He holds her tight against him as she peaks, as he whispers words against her lips that she can barely hear or understand, as a hand trails up and down her spine. Her eyes snap open when the sensation of falling tingles through her bloodstream until her back hits the mattress and he is on top of her. She can still feel how hard he is within her as he begins thrusting inside her at a desperate pace.
"Say it," he rasps, and for a moment her mind goes back to earlier whenever he'd taken his pleasures from her without thought to her own. But this time it is different. Instead of demanding, he almost sounds as though he's begging her. "Say those words."
"I love you," she answers, and he buries his face in the junction between her shoulder and neck, biting her there and muffling his moan. Strange. It sounded almost like a sob. He comes almost immediately after, filling her up completely.
Jacob stays there on top of her for a long while, still inside her. When he finally pulls out of her and settles himself next to her, he stares at her as though she is just a figment of his imagination, hands tracing indistinguishable shapes against her skin.
"Where have you been?" he asks suddenly, voice wavering only slightly. His arms enclose around her, tightening until she is pressed against him.
"I don't know," Mercy answers.
"I think that I've been waiting for you," he whispers, lips just barely ghosting over hers, eyes closing. "Searching for you."
"I'm here," she says, "I'm here." She holds him back, just as tight, as they drift to sleep.
Mercy Seed
March 30, 2018 – 1:09 PM
Mercy sighs as she presses her forehead against the hardwood of the ranch's front door. She breathes in long and deep as she remembers that night on the ranch, the many other nights she'd spent here talking and laughing with her family. Of all the places they could've taken Nick Rye's plane, and they'd brought it here. The ranch had been swarming with Peggies when she showed up, as she expected. This place is probably one of the hotspots John had expected her to come to.
The outpost had been difficult for her to take. Every time she took one Peggie down, another would show up in some other random part of the mansion. Still she and Boomer managed somehow. She lifts her head, looking down at the dog panting happily at her side. She gently scratches him behind the ear, letting out a breathless laugh when he starts tapping his foot and leaning into her fingers.
She's still waiting on the Resistance members to show so that they can hold the place. The mansion is eerily quiet, and she half expects John to jump her when she's got her back turned. Though, she knows he's probably in his bunker right now. After all, the Collapse has begun. At any moment the world could just burst into flames, and the Seeds need to be ready. She shudders, pulling open the door and going inside.
Mercy stopped going to the dinners after the video had been released. Though not much has changed since last she visited. She looks around at the various animals, skinned and stuffed and mounted, about the living and dining area. Jacob had told her once that he'd killed them all and John had kept the trophies. All manner of books line the walls, too. She'd borrowed and read some of them. She wonders if John has also read them, or if he keeps them just to show off. She'd never asked, and she feels guilty for not making an effort to get to know her brother-in-law. She knows so much about Faith and Joseph and yet nothing of John.
Well, now that will change.
A part of her feels mortified about looking through his things in an attempt to learn everything she can about him, anything that will help her save him. John is still her brother. The idea of searching through his personal belongings makes her sick to her stomach. When she gets into the dining room, her eyes widen in surprise. His dining area has been decked out like some kind of armory. There are ammo crates stacked high here and there, bullet-proof vests, she even finds a rocket launcher of all things on the dining table. At the end of the table, a few files have been laid out, particularly hers and Joey's from the department. There are all kinds of sticky notes that are stuck all over their pages, John's cursive handwriting too illegible for her to make out anything that he's put. Damn.
On the other end of the table is his phone, a white box-shaped thing that most of the residents of Hope County have. The little red light on the front keeps flashing, indicating that there's a message on it. She circles around the table and presses the button to play the message.
"After all the atonements, all the confessions, and all that you have done for me and Eden's Gate it's not enough. Is it, John?" Mercy sucks in a breath when she hears Joseph's voice. "Cast away your past. You need to open up your heart. You need to see that there is more love all around you. All the pain and suffering you spread will not help us in the long run. These actions will only feed the sin inside you. It will grow stronger. It will convince you to do wicked things. Those you scar too deeply, they will heal. They will become carriers of your sin. They will spread that sin to others. I've seen your death in a vision. You're destined to be slayed by your own sin. It will come back around in a new form. It's only a matter of when. I've seen you die young, I've seen you die old. The difference between the two outcomes is how much love you let into your heart. I pray that you hear these words before it's too late. I want to see you become an old man in the paradise we prepared for. I love you, brother. I love you."
Her heart feels heavy when the message ends. She really should've talked to him more, but Jacob would've never let it happen. She remembers everything she'd read of John in the Book of Joseph. She can't imagine how difficult it would be to let go of all the terrible things he'd been through. She has a hard enough time moving past her own issues.
Mercy sighs, slumping down in a chair. She knows that this is her key to helping him, but how is she supposed to execute years of work in such a short time? How can she succeed where Joseph, John's flesh and blood, cannot? She groans, burying her face in her hands. Fuck, I should've talked to John. There's no way she can do this. Joseph is the one who knows how to heal, she just destroys. Destroys her family, Hope County, her life.
No, she thinks to herself, I can't keep beating myself up. I'm doing good. She needs to remember why she's doing this, needs to stay on her path. She can't give in to them.
By the time Resistance members start trickling onto the property, she's already searched the place. Of course, she finds nothing of importance. The only other personal item there is a letter to Joseph. Leave it to John to make sure nothing can be found in his home that the Deputy can use against him. She greets her people, silently directing each one to their tasks: guard duty, watching the prisoners, cataloguing the weapons.
She's on her way to the hangar, about to fly Nick's plane off into the sunset (technically returning it to him, but she let's herself imagine) when her radio beeps to life, scaring the life out of her. "You take homewrecking to a new level, don't you?" She recognizes John's silky tone immediately. "I would expect no less of a sinner."
Mercy swallows thickly as she rounds the corner of the hangar, unclipping the radio from her belt as she leans back against the wall. She turns the frequency, typing test on each one. She doesn't know how John got ahold of her radio frequency. Finally, he responds when she calls through channel two. Joey's frequency. She lets out a breath through her nose. Of course, she should've thought he'd have access to her partner's radio.
"Ah, there you are. Always so shy," he teases, and it stings to hear the venom in his voice. "But we both know who you really are, don't we, Deputy? Sin is inescapable, after all. I've felt that sin inside me too, still feel it. Me and you, we are one in the same, and just like me, you too can be forgiven. You can still march with us to Eden's Gate." Mercy screws her eyes shut as she presses her forehead against the radio, as if John can somehow feel her through the frequency. "I can still cleanse your soul. I can give you freedom from the burden you carry on your shoulders." The words are comforting; they make her heart soar and offer her the hope of absolution. But she can hear the strain in his voice, the malicious underlining of his tone. "All you have to do is confess. There will be pain and it will be difficult for you to let go, but you will be cleansed. Isn't that what you've wanted all this time?"
She can't answer him, does not. What does she say to him? There is just so much. He hums in disapproval on the other end. "If you will not come to me willingly, then I will just have to send my Chosen after you. I will have you soon, Deputy. A word of warning: don't fight back. That will only make it harder for you."
She snaps the radio back to her belt, glancing around herself warily. She goes inside the hangar. She needs to get in the air fast. They can't take her out in the air; it'll kill her, and she's still a Seed. She knows they want her alive, at least.
"Hoorah, Deputy!" Nick shouts over her radio when she figures out how to get the plane going. "I just heard on the Peggie radio some intruder made off with my plane! You need to get some distance. Just head north for now."
Mercy tightens a white-knuckled grip on the joystick, nerves tingling from more than just the fear of crashing the plane. She tries to tell herself that the only reason they're saying that is because she liberated Seed Ranch just hours ago, but she can't shake the unsettling feeling creeping down her spine that someone is watching her. Waiting to strike.
