A|N: Here is part two! On the last chapter, the reviews were crazy! I loved them so much. Edward is a bad guy right now, but I promise he won't always be. He's slowly changing already. Also, I'd just like to issue an apology for the last chapter. I was completely careless when I uploaded it for not putting in a warning of what ensued, and for that I am so very sorry. I know how much of a trigger things like that can be, so I promise to not let that happen again.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Twilight. Any part of it.
Note: An edited and revised part 1 will be uploaded soon. I'll let you all know when I post it, so you an go back and read the changes if you'd like.
Chapter Nine: The story so far, pt. 2
Waking up the next morning was hell. It hurt. It wasn't a physical hurt, either. It was much worse than that, but I couldn't describe it. It got worse whenever I thought of Bella, when I thought of the night before. Everything hurt. I'd never felt like that before.
After getting ready for the day, I headed downstairs to the kitchen, where Cynthia was already preparing breakfast. "Morning, Cyn."
She looked away from what she was doing for a moment to give me a smile. "Good morning, Edward. Did you sleep well?"
"No." I snorted. That was an understatement.
"Does it have anything to do with the broken liquor cabinet in the living room?" she asked.
I rolled my eyes and chuckled quietly, sitting down at the island with a sigh. "Way to ease in to things."
She shrugged. Beating around the bush was never Cynthia's thing. "Well?"
"It does," I told her, nodding. "But I'm not going to get in to that right now."
Cynthia respected my decision. "How's Bella? After going home yesterday, I couldn't think of anything else. I was so worried. I'm really glad you came home early to be with her."
I hoped she never found out that I never actually went home early.
"Yeah, she's fine, I guess. She was just…" I trailed off. I didn't think freely giving up information of Bella's past was something she would have liked. "It's something she'll have to tell you herself if she feels like you need to know," I finally said.
Cynthia nodded. "Okay." That was it; she let it go. She could respect other people's privacy.
She finished making breakfast and then handed me my plate, placing Bella's in the microwave to keep warm for her while she slept.
"Thank you," I said before digging in.
Cynthia scowled at me for a moment, annoyed that I hadn't said grace, before rolling her eyes. "You're welcome." She poured me a cup of orange juice before heading for the door. "I'm going to go wake up Bella and then get started on laundry. Have a nice day at work, Edward."
"Thanks."
As soon as she left, I tensed, waiting for the moment she'd come running back down here, ready to destroy me. I'd have left to prolong the inevitable, but I had to see Bella before I did.
That moment never came. Twenty minutes later, Cynthia walked past me with a basket of laundry, gave me a smile, and went on about her business. Another thirty minutes after that, Bella came down.
"Good morning, Bella," I murmured.
She walked to the microwave where her breakfast was, Cynthia probably having told her that she'd left it there, and nodded. "Edward."
I didn't know what to say. She didn't appear to remember the night before, and I didn't want to say anything that would trigger a memory of it. "Can we talk about last night?" I asked, albeit cautiously. I needed to know if she remembered something.
"Look, Edward, I appreciate you taking care of me last night when I got sick, but let's not bring it up anymore, okay? Let's just…let it go."
That didn't help figure out just how much she remembered about it. I couldn't let it go.
"I can't. I'd really like to know what you remember of the night before," I told her.
She didn't acknowledge I'd said anything.
"I just want to help you fill in the blanks just in case you're confused about anything."
She pulled her plate out of the microwave and, after saying a short grace, started eating.
I snapped, "Do you remember trying to sleep with me last night? Throwing your drunken ass at me, practically begging me to fuck you? Do you remember that?"
Her body tensed, and I got my answer. She did remember that, but I was certain she didn't remember what came after that.
She would have given herself away by now if she remembered that.
"Tell me about Edward Sr.," she demanded suddenly, turning around to glare at me. "Tell me about Elizabeth, too, while you're at it. Tell me all about how he hit you and your mother. Let me hear it, Edward." Tell me what you remember about those nights. She didn't say that, but I could see it written all over her face.
Her words caught me off guard. They brought about a familiar pain in my chest that I didn't like, and I opened and closed my mouth a few times to say something to that, anything, but I couldn't. So, I merely glared and said, "I'm only trying to help."
"If I wanted or needed your help, I would have asked," she retorted.
I glared harder. "Fine."
"Fine."
I turned on my heel and walked out the kitchen without another word. She was suddenly starting to piss me off, and had I stayed any longer, an even bigger, more problematic argument would have ensued.
I grabbed my briefcase off the hallway table and walked out through the garage, slamming the door in my anger.
I could understand why my father hated women so damn much.
"If she's stressing you out this much, why don't you just divorce her?" Tanya asked, rolling her eyes. "Surely pleasing Esme isn't worth all this drama?"
All morning, I'd been trying to work, but I couldn't focus. I was pissed and anxious, tensing whenever my phone rang; sure it was someone in my family calling to threaten my life because Bella remembered and told. My paranoia only pissed me off further. She'd said yes. She wanted it, initiated it. I just wanted to keep it going. My guilt from the previous night had been long gone by time I stepped foot in my office, replaced my anger, irritation, and countless other emotions I couldn't even identify.
Needless to say, when Kate went out on her lunch break, I had enough pent-up frustration to last a lifetime that not calling Tanya wasn't even an option. After a while, she couldn't handle the roughness anymore, and I was too angry to be anything close to patient and gentle that I gave up. I didn't rape women, and I didn't hit them. I didn't want to stoop that low.
But you already have. My thoughts were telling me that all day.
After we'd caught our breath and got dressed again, I began to pace. Eventually, I told her all about my "marriage" to Bella. I realized I needed to vent to someone, and I knew she wouldn't be fazed by this, so I told her.
"I can't," I answered.
Tanya finished picking up the last of the papers we'd knocked off my desk and then sat on said desk, raising an eyebrow at me in disbelief. "Why can't you?"
In truth, I couldn't answer that. I didn't have a "why"; I just knew I couldn't. I'd contemplated it earlier, but I threw out the thought almost immediately. Divorce wasn't an option.
"I just can't."
Tanya nodded, a thoughtful look on her face. "I've gotta say, hon, I've never seen you react so…oddly, for lack of a better word, about a woman before."
"Oddly." I snorted. That was one way to put it.
It didn't take a genius to see I hadn't been the same since the arrival of Bella.
"From what you've told me, and from what I'm seeing now, I think I know what this is," Tanya said, looking sure of herself. "I do. I'm sure of it."
When she didn't elaborate, I scowled. "Care to share with the class?"
She smirked. "No, no, I don't, actually."
"Get out," I snapped. If she wasn't going to be helpful, I didn't want to talk with her anymore.
She snickered, never one to be fazed by my anger, grabbed her purse, and got off my desk. "As you wish, my dear; I'll leave."
She winked at me as she walked past, and unable to resist, I gave her ass a firm slap and chuckled at the squeak that came from her. I leaned against my desk and crossed my arms loosely, smirking. "Come see me tomorrow?"
She turned back to look at me and nodded, giving me a smile. "I don't know, Mr. Cullen. What will the others think?" she asked coyly. "What will they say?"
"I was hoping we'd give them something to talk about," I answered.
"Of course you were. You never want to be discreet about anything. I'll think about it. Now that I've been inside your workplace, I'm not as reluctant anymore," she said.
The thing about my father is, he needed—not just wanted, but needed—everyone to know he was the boss. That he was the reason this company was here and flourishing. One of the ways he saw to doing that was by giving himself his own floor. You could get to this floor by the elevator on the right side and the stairs on the left. Really, it was just a long, dimly lit hallway with a big, glass office in the middle overlooking downtown Seattle. I recalled him from a long time ago saying the long walk from the end of the hall to his office intimated whoever had to come to him. I didn't really see it then, but I see it now.
Since I was now head of this company, I got the office. Ever since I met Tanya, I'd been trying to get her to come here for a little rendezvous, but she wouldn't do it. While she was a bit promiscuous, daring and always looking for fun, she had limits. Finally getting her here was perfect and just what I needed.
"So, tomorrow then?" I said, knowing she would be back.
She rolled her eyes. "Tomorrow it is." She turned to leave, but right before she walked out of the door, she turned back to me. "Just for the record: from what you told me today, and what I've heard about your dad, I don't think you're anything like him."
I watched her walk away with wide eyes, rendered speechless by her last words.
Oddly enough, that made me feel good.
I threw her a party.
I couldn't say for sure why I did it, but I did. I'd had one planned for the day before, which was her actual birthday, but this was different. I knew this was different, and not just because of the sudden location change.
I just…felt like throwing her a fucking party, and that was the only reasonable explanation I could give Tanya when she'd called to ask me over to her place. Before we got off the phone, I could hear the smirk in her voice, but just like back at my office, she wouldn't elaborate, and I hung up on her in annoyance.
"I'd rented out Kiss, an up-scale club known for its great party hosting, but this is all you get since you decided to skip out," I explained as we pulled up to the park in our neighborhood.
The car ride was silent. It wasn't awkward, but it definitely wasn't friendly, either. There was also a hint of tension, but that was easily ignored by turning the radio on. We were both being stubborn, and it showed.
"This is fine," she mumbled, stepping out of the car.
I turned the car off and got out as well, heading over to the picnic area of the park with her. The smile that took over her face when she spotted everyone was blinding, and I found myself growing jealous at it. She wouldn't smile at me like that in a hundred years, I sulked.
The sudden pettiness stopped me up short, and I frowned. I'd never been jealous in my life. I never had a reason to be, so to suddenly be jealous right then out of nowhere was weird, and I didn't like it.
While I thought this over, they all took that moment to hug Bella, passing her from friend to friend. "Happy Birthday!"
Bella laughed, her grin growing bigger. "Thank you!"
The friendlier she got with everyone, the more jealous I got. It skyrocketed whenever she talked to Embry. It was ridiculous; I knew it, especially since I invited him because I knew she liked him, but I was.
It wasn't that hard to act that happy with me.
The music was turned up then, and they all began to enjoy themselves, running amuck on the playground like they were a bunch of children. I took that time to have a few minutes for myself, grabbing a beer and walking a little ways away from them before parking it on a bench.
I sat there for what felt like hours, though I knew it couldn't have been more than thirty or forty minutes, thinking everything over.
I knew the way I thought, the way I behaved, was a little screwed, but there wasn't much I could do about that. It was the way I was raised; it was the way I was, the way I had always been for a long time. I didn't see that changing anytime soon, but I knew I could do better than how I was doing now.
And then there was the situation with Bella. It was messed up from the beginning; I knew that, too, but that couldn't be helped now, either. I would try to handle it much better than I had been, though. I wanted her to stay—I needed her to stay. I didn't want to have to go through the trouble of finding a new wife, and if I stopped avoiding my thoughts, I could admit that I liked her. She was like Rosalie in a few ways, which was why I was sure we could be good friends. I would make this work until I was sure there was absolutely no hope of us and our predicament working out.
I was pulled out of my head by a figure appearing in my peripheral vision, and I looked up to see Bella standing there, looking at me. I decided that we'd start now. We'd wipe our slate clean again and start over.
I grinned at her and beckoned her forward. After getting herself comfortable, I placed my hand on her knee and squeezed it lightly. It was my greeting as I sipped on my beer.
"Weather's perfect for a barbeque," Bella said after we'd been quiet for a while.
I raised an eyebrow at her. After all the arguing we'd been doing, that was all she could come up with to start a conversation? She nodded. That was horrible.
"Edward, about last night…"
I shook my head. I didn't want to think about that night at all. I wanted to forget it all and move on. "Don't mention it, Bella. Really, it's over with."
"But…"
"Honestly, I think I—we—should just mind our own business. Going over old things is just completely unnecessary. It's not why we're here, and it's not going to help our situation any, right?" I said, finding this reasonable.
As I watched her go over what I'd just told her in her head, I knew the minute she'd recalled our latest fight from earlier, when she'd mentioned wanting to go home again. I was fine, though. I took her threatening to leave with a grain of salt and would only believe it when I saw it.
Bella groaned. "Ugh, I'm sorry. I did it again. I honestly…"
"It wasn't that," I assured her. "I'm just now realizing that we can still keep our personal lives personal." That was how I saw it, anyway. We didn't need to tell each other everything. We didn't need to talk about anything from our pasts, etc, etc. We just needed to get finally get along.
She nodded. "Fine."
"Fine."
We weren't able to keep up our straight faces then, breaking out in laughter as the ridiculousness of how we were acting caught up with us. I'd been accusing her of behaving like a child this whole time, not yet realizing that I may have been doing the same thing.
"We have to stop doing that, I think," she said, and I nodded in agreement. "But, yeah, okay. We can do that. Keep our personal lives personal. Shouldn't be too hard."
I stared at her for a moment, glad with the way things went and finding myself happy to have that smile turned on me. "Good."
"Great."
Her tone was a little snarky, but I thought it was just her being funny.
I leveled her with a look that I hope said "Don't start."
"Bella," I said, a quiet warning in my tone.
"Friends?" she asked suddenly, holding her hand out for me.
I chuckled and answered, "Friends." I took her hand and shook it. "We shouldn't have to make up like this every day, you know."
"If you stopped arguing with me, we wouldn't have to," she replied with a shrug.
I opened my mouth to argue, but I realized the mistake in that and only snickered instead. "Happy Birthday, Bella." I handed her my beer, my gift to her "Enjoy."
She took a sip, smirked, and replied, "I shall."
We sat there for the remainder of our time after that, not saying a word, merely enjoying each other's company.
"This beer taste like ass, just so you know," Bella said out of the blue.
I chuckled, and we settled back into our quietness. It was peaceful and comforting, the way we'd been able to just quickly work things out.
However, the moment of peace didn't last for me. I should have known it wouldn't, that this was all too good to be true.
A sense of dread washed over me, and I couldn't help but feel that things were soon going to take a turn for the worst.
