Good morning, Happy Thursday!

I hope you all have had better weeks than I've had. You know when just, everything happens at once and you somehow manage to get the one of two colds you get a year during it? Yeah, it's been very that. BUT! The day I let real life things stop me from keeping my fanfiction together will be a sad day indeed.

So this chapter. I'm feeling a little self-conscious because I want it to be probably way better than it is, but we'll see. Let's just say we're at the top of the second drop on the roller coaster, so next week is the drop. Let's enjoy the high while we can, yes?

Right, fic time!


Kamui spent the next week in a state of intense excitement and nerves, texting Subaru and thinking about his party constantly. He barely noticed Valentine's Day, except for a text from Kotori, which he answered, and a text from Fuuma, which he ignored. However, in the days that followed, it seemed Sorata and Arashi were smiling at each other more often and Yuzuriha was acting louder and more exuberant than usual. Kamui could tell something was wrong, but whenever he'd ask if she was all right she'd just blow him off.

"Nothing, just this manga I'm reading," she said, dismissively, lunchtime on the Friday before Subaru's birthday party.

"Is it really that bad?" Kamui asked her, trying to sound simultaneously concerned and teasing so it'd be up to her how she took it.

"Yes," she replied, gesturing dramatically with her drink. "And I love it." Kamui didn't reply, but watched her eyes dart to Sorata and Arashi, who were absorbed in their own conversation, then to a poster across the room urging people to join prom committee. "Kamui, do you want to go to prom together?" She asked, rather boldly. "If neither of us can get dates, I mean."

"So what, we're each other's in case of emergency person?" He asked, grinning, and she grinned back.

"Is that cool?"

"Sure," he replied, shrugging. "You want matching corsages too?"

"Of course!" She replied, shoving him gently with her elbow. "Are you getting Subaru something for his birthday?" She asked next, a tease in her voice.

"Shut up," Kamui snapped.

"Oh we all know he's getting something!" Sorata interjected, and Yuzuriha burst out laughing.

"I love how the only thing that brings Sorata back to the conversation is an opportunity to make a dick comment to Kamui!" She giggled, appreciatively.

"Interesting way to phrase that," Arashi said, dryly, and everyone laughed, even Kamui.

"I hate you," he said to whoever was paying attention, before changing the subject to homework.


The next evening, Kamui was in his room, chatting on AIM with Kotori and waiting for his mother to leave. She was working another overnight, and though Sorata had already agreed to cover for him, his plan was still to leave after her and be back before she came home.

k4mui :: people out there still sound so fucking weird

littlebirdxo :: they're no weirder than people back home

littlebirdxo :: it's just a different kind of weird

k4mui :: LOL fair enough

k4mui :: i'm sure i'll see it when i come visit

There was a knock on Kamui's door.

"Come in." It creaked open, revealing his mother on the threshold.

"I'm off," she said, and Kamui nodded.

"Be careful." She smiled, crossed the room and kissed him on the top of the head. "Ah, stop," he protested, very half-heartedly. She ruffled his hair.

"I will. I love you."

"Love you too." And she was out the door. Kamui's heart sped up sharply, and he waited a few minutes just in case she came back, then,

k4mui :: mom just left!

k4mui :: g2g!

littlebirdxo :: good luck! have fun!

Kamui closed his laptop, heaved himself out of bed and texted Subaru to let him know he was on his way. He changed into clean clothes, spent ten minutes worrying that he might be over or under dressed, then gathered his things and headed out.

It was very dark outside, not to mention bitterly cold. A wet, spiteful wind blew hard into Kamui's face, but he put on his headphones and kept walking, the happy anticipation inside him making him warm and impervious. He got stuck at a red light when he hit Memorial Boulevard and reached into his pocket for his cellphone.

"see you soon!" From Subaru. Kamui's heart swelled, bringing an excited flush to his skin. He wanted to reply, but couldn't think of anything to say, so just shoved his phone back in his pocket. He knew on some level it was crazy to be this excited over only a confirmation text, but he couldn't help it.

'You just want his attention,' he thought, suddenly and unkindly. He shook his head and turned left, heading towards Meeting Street, though his stomach twisted uncomfortably. It was true he liked Subaru's attention, but that wasn't new. 'Just like with Fuuma,' his mind continued, coldly. "What the fuck," Kamui said out loud, speeding up to get around people walking too slowly. It wasn't his fault: Fuuma had been so blatant about everything, and it only got worse the more time they spent together.

"You sure you have a girlfriend?"

"She's across the country…"

"Aren't you sick of your hand?"

"You're so fucking clingy, stop it," Kamui would always reply, and Fuuma would laugh appreciatively. However, there was undeniably a part of Kamui that was getting off on all the attention. No one had ever been so blunt or obvious like this before, and denying Fuuma what he so obviously wanted made Kamui feel powerful as nothing else ever had. He had an amazing girlfriend and a hot guy who wanted him; you couldn't ask for a better upper hand!

The only problem was that it was getting harder and harder for Kamui to keep saying no. Fuuma was so gorgeous, so enigmatic, so different from anyone else he'd ever met and so representative of everything Kamui was giving up at sixteen to be with the woman he loved.

Kamui sighed heavily, making sure his way was clear before crossing the street. He reflected that Fuuma's intentions had at least been clear, where as he was still unsure of Subaru's. However, he couldn't tell if that made it worse or not. It wasn't like knowing what Fuuma was after had made what had happened any less awful. Kamui heaved another heavy sigh, remembering the night everything had gotten completely fucked up. Fuuma had picked him up to take him to a party, car windows down and D.O.E. blasting.

"Whose house are we going to?" Kamui asked.

"This girl Satsuki who's riding Yuuto's dick insanely hard," Fuuma replied, and Kamui scoffed. "She's cool though," he added, giving credit where credit was due. "We hooked up once too. It was okay." Kamui had no idea what to say to that so he just stared out of the window. It had been beautiful out all day, though the air was wet and heavy, and clouds seemed to be rolling in.

"It looks like it's gonna rain."

"It's fine," Fuuma said, dismissively, and Kamui had no idea what to say to that either.

A sudden cry of laughter startled Kamui and he looked around wildly, but it was only a group of drunk people hurrying into a nearby bar. When had he reached Meeting Street?! Kamui shook his head, forcing himself to pay attention as he walked brusquely the rest of the way to Subaru's building. He smiled excitedly when it came into view, and he sprinted across the street and up onto the porch. He pulled the door open, and could already hear music and laughter coming from the second floor. He took off his headphones and shoved them into his bag before climbing the stairs, and his heart pounded excitedly as he knocked on the door.

"No no, let me get it," came Subaru's voice from inside. A broad grin spread across Kamui's face as the door opened, revealing Subaru, dressed in black and looking exhausted, though flushed and excited. "Hey!"

"Hi," Kamui replied, cautiously elated. Subaru stepped out of the way and Kamui crossed the threshold to find his roommate on the couch and their friend from the show beside her with a videogame controller in his hand.

"Oh shit!"

"Hi!" Kamui returned their smiles, his stomach giving a nervous leap.

"I'll put your stuff in my room," Subaru said, and Kamui nodded and handed him his coat and his bag.

"We're fucking assholes and are already drunk," Subaru's roommate explained, watching him carry Kamui's things to his bedroom.

"Yup, always going hard," his friend added, raising his glass of water. Kamui just shrugged and stepped out of his shoes.

"I knew the first part was true, but I didn't want to assume anything else," he replied, and they laughed.

"Do you want a drink?" Subaru asked, reemerging from his bedroom. Kamui could see how warm he was in the face, and his blush matched his as they smiled at each other.

"Yes please." As they walked into the kitchen, there was another knock on the door, followed by a rush of excited voices as more people entered the apartment. "Happy birthday, by the way," Kamui told Subaru, under the cover of the noise.

"Thank you," he replied, opening the refrigerator. "All we have right now is beer, is that cool?" Kamui narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

"You guys didn't get this fucked up just from beer," he said.

"Shh," Subaru replied, pressing his finger to his lips, and they both laughed. "We had liquor, but we drank it all this afternoon." Kamui rolled his eyes. It occurred to him suddenly how weird it was that Subaru was so okay with giving him alcohol when he'd freaked out about him being seventeen before. However, he handed him a beer before he could think about it too much.

"Cheers," he said, and they toasted each other and drank. Kamui smiled in satisfaction and immediately felt confidence rise up in his chest. "What have you been up to?" He asked, and Subaru gave him an exasperated look.

"Nothing new. Pretending like I know what I'm doing for thesis, mostly. How have you been?" Kamui just shrugged.

"Nothing. Homework and like, sleep."

"I miss sleep," Subaru said, thoughtfully, and Kamui laughed.

"Yo, where the fuck is Subaru?!" Came an unfamiliar voice loudly from the other room. Subaru sighed resignedly and gestured for Kamui to follow him. Even more people had joined the party, but one couple in particular exclaimed when they saw him.

"Hey!" He said, smiling and hugging both of them.

"Happy birthday!"

"We brought cake!"

"And rum!"

"Oh my god, you didn't have to do that, thank you!" Kamui just smiled and sipped his beer. He was more than happy to just watch Subaru talk to his friends, watch his beautiful eyes widen in excitement, watch him throw his head back as he laughed.

"Kamui!" He whirled around and found Subaru's roommate on the couch. "Come sit down," she said, patting the spot beside her. Kamui did so, and could finally see what game they were playing.

".hack?" He asked, eagerly.

"Fuck yeah," her friend said, making the character chase a small, giggling creature. "Reminisce is out in May so I figured I'd replay this. The first four were so much better though."

"No shit," Kamui agreed.

"At least they don't take their sweet time coming out," Subaru's roommate said, fairly.

"Yeah, not like-" but he was interrupted by yet another knock on the door. They both looked around, but then immediately got back into their videogame debate when they saw Subaru answer it. Kamui joined in periodically, though he was more interested in watching the other guests. Even though there were more and more people and they were getting more and more intoxicated, the energy was still good and relaxed. Kamui couldn't help but remember the party Fuuma had taken him to, where everyone had instantly been judgmental and condescending, and it had only gotten worse the more fucked up they got.

"Kamui!"

"Huh?" He turned sharply to see Subaru smiling at him from across the room.

"Come here a second?" Kamui heaved himself off the couch, downed the rest of his beer and hurried to Subaru's side.

"What's up?" He asked, feeling suddenly shy under the glow of his smile.

"We're going to cut this cake, I think," he said.

"Sweet!" Subaru laughed and pressed his fingertips to his mouth, his eyes shining.

"I'm glad you came," he said through his fingers, almost like it were a secret. Kamui's heart throbbed suddenly and he moved closer.

"Me too," he replied, quietly but earnestly. Subaru took his fingers away from his mouth, and Kamui's eyes immediately fixed upon his lips, gently parted and so inviting.

"You guys want shots?!" Someone called, and Subaru and Kamui turned, blushing. Everyone had apparently gathered in the tiny kitchen, and were all holding plastic cups or mismatched shot glasses and looking expectantly at Subaru.

"Sorry!" He cried, hurrying over. Kamui followed, looking down to avoid the stares.

"Here," Subaru's roommate said, pressing shot glasses into both of their hands before raising her own. "Happy birthday, Subaru!" She called, and everyone raised their glasses in agreement. Subaru laughed rather embarrassedly. "And to Hokuto too, of course, killing it across the pond!" Everyone cheered and downed their shots. Kamui shuddered, but immediately felt a pleasurable heat rush up his neck and face. "Cool, you guys wanna cut this cake?"

"Sure!"

"Do we have candles?"

"Yeah I brought some, hang on…"

"And we know we'll definitely find a lighter!"

"Here, let me," Subaru started to say, blushing from the drink and the attention. However, his friends all gave him extremely nasty looks.

"You sit the fuck down," his roommate said, gesturing with the rather large kitchen knife she was apparently planning to use on the cake. Subaru held up his arms as though surrendering.

"All right, all right! Sorry, for fuck's sake…" He walked back to sit down on the couch, leaving his shot glass on the counter. Kamui followed at once and took the seat beside him. Their thighs were already touching.

"Your friends are so cool," Kamui said. Subaru laughed and ran his fingers through his hair, then rested his arm on his thigh. Kamui stared hard at Subaru's hand, and for the briefest moment his rapidly clouding brain told him to take it. He shuddered and averted his eyes, and they found Subaru's tattoo instead. Feeling this would be safer, Kamui placed his fingertips on Subaru's inner forearm, and with a surge of excitement saw goose bumps rise up on his skin. He bit his lip and traced Subaru's tattoo with his fingers, over all the lines and curves. "When did you get this?" He asked, and Subaru leaned closer.

"The winter of my sophomore year," he replied, rotating his arm to show Kamui more, give him more skin to touch.

"I really like it."

"It was my sister's final for a textile design class."

"That's fucking cool!" Subaru smiled affectionately and slid his arm up, allowing Kamui's fingers to touch his palm instead. It was warm and smooth, and goose bumps erupted on Kamui's own skin. He looked up at Subaru, whose lips were parted, and took hold of his hand before he could think about it. A shiver seemed to run through both of them and Subaru took a sharp breath in.

"I," he began, but at that moment, a chorus of Happy Birthday swelled from the kitchen as all the party guests paraded into the living room, carrying the cake and more drinks. Subaru let go of Kamui's hand and covered his eyes despairingly. Kamui joined in singing and wrapped his arm around Subaru's shoulders instead, grinning despite being interrupted. Subaru's roommate placed the cake in the center of the coffee table as they finished the song, and he took his hand away from his face.

"Make a wish!" Someone cried. Subaru made an impatient noise, but brought his hands together as though praying. He closed his eyes for a moment, then blew. Everyone cheered, even though he only managed to extinguish half the candles.

"Cut back to one pack a day you'll get your wish next year!" His friend cried, encouragingly. Everyone burst out laughing, even Subaru. "Holy shit that would be an amazing anti-smoking ad," he continued, thoughtfully.

"What, smoke and you can't blow out all your birthday candles?" Someone else cried, giggling, and there was another chorus of laughter.

"Yeah!" He replied, enthusiastically. "Put posters like that up in high schools we'll be good." Subaru's roommate snorted with laughter and began serving slices of cake.

"Would that work, Kamui?" She asked, grinning, and Subaru let out a choked cry. Kamui, however, thought for a moment.

"It'd probably work better than all the pictures of cancer, honestly," he said, dryly, and again everyone laughed. Subaru accepted the first slice of cake from his roommate with a sigh, then tried to hand it to Kamui, who gave him an incredulous look. "No way, that's yours," he said, squeezing his shoulders.

"You're sweet," Subaru replied, taking a bite with a satisfied smile.

The party continued in the same chill, easy way, everyone eating cake, smoking and drinking, laughing and talking or taking turns at whichever videogame was on. Kamui remained beside Subaru on the couch the whole time, his arm around him or just leaning against his shoulder. Periodically, people would approach them and start a conversation, and they were always polite to Kamui, even though he wouldn't contribute much. Everyone kept talking about thesis or the upcoming student showcase. Although they sounded exhausted, they always seemed supportive rather than competitive: all of Subaru's friends told him some variant of,

"I can't wait to see your work!" to which he'd always reply,

"Yes, me too!" Eventually, after more drinks and more cake and more conversations, they were on their own again. Subaru relaxed against the couch, looking drunk and sleepy. "I'm not neglecting you, am I?" He asked.

"Nah," Kamui replied, smiling and leaning back against the couch too. He turned to face Subaru, and the volume of the party seemed to lower as they looked at each other. Kamui swallowed, taking in his flushed cheeks, bright eyes and parted lips. He breathed in deeply and exhaled shakily. "Subaru?" He asked, softly, on a sudden swell of bravery.

"Hm?" Of course, Kamui's mind instantly deserted him. He swallowed, shifting ever so slightly closer, his eyes darting once more to Subaru's lips. He wanted to kiss him so badly, but he wasn't sure if he was allowed. They'd waited until they'd been alone last time, and that had always been Fuuma's rule too. He groaned softly and stared Subaru hard in the face.

"I like you," he whispered, shivering as he said it. Subaru gasped and bit his lip, looking almost like he was in pain.

"I," he began, and Kamui could practically feel the conflict. It made his stomach twist guiltily even as his body and heart were begging him to give in.

"It's okay," he said, softly.

"Is it?" Subaru asked.

"Yeah!" Kamui whispered back, though he wasn't exactly sure what they were talking about anymore.

"Are you… Are you allowed to be out this late? Is that…?" He blushed, and Kamui's stomach twisted again.

"It's fine, don't worry," he assured him. Then, on another swell of bravery, "I could stay over, if-"

"Would you want to?" Subaru asked, almost sharply. Kamui's heart was beating so hard against his ribs it practically made him dizzy.

"I mean, if that's cool, yeah!" He replied, blushing deeply at how eager he sounded, even though it was completely sincere. 'You need to be home before-' his mind tried to remind him, but Kamui ignored it, waiting with rapt attention. Subaru's expression tightened for a moment before shifting into a hesitant, longing smile.

"Stay," he said, even more quietly, and Kamui's head spun as fresh excitement surged inside him. He nodded and returned Subaru's smile. "I, I'm not," Subaru started to say, but then shook his head. "We can kiss, that's it," he said, in barely more than a whisper.

"That's okay!" Kamui assured him, his heart swelling shockingly in his chest, pumping the excitement through his body. Subaru sighed and took Kamui's hand, and he returned the gesture with a squeeze. They said nothing else to each other, just watched the party wind down around them. Kamui hoped it wouldn't take too long; he was already getting impatient. Fortunately, once one guest insisted she had to get home, it was like a chain reaction. Everyone approached Subaru in twos and threes to say goodbye and wish him happy birthday one last time. Finally, it was just Kamui, Subaru, his roommate, and some guy with whom she was holding hands left in the apartment. She smiled as the door slammed behind their last leaving guests.

"Did you have fun?" She asked.

"I did," Subaru replied, smiling back at her. She crossed the room, pulling the guy with her.

"Happy birthday," she said, quietly, her expression soft.

"Thank you."

"Good night," she continued, playfully, and they headed off down the hall. Subaru watched her go and waited for the door to slam before addressing Kamui.

"You're sure you're okay to stay over?" Kamui nodded vigorously, and Subaru got to his feet, pulling him up too. As they walked towards Subaru's bedroom, Kamui's vision seemed to tunnel in on the just-open door, on the back of Subaru's neck, on the curve of his shoulder. Subaru pushed the door open, and Kamui squeezed his hand as they stopped on the threshold. It was dark except for the string of Christmas lights and the streetlight filtering in through the window. Subaru turned, hesitated a moment, then pressed his forehead to Kamui's. "Go lie down, I'll be there in a minute." Kamui let out a soft groan and tried to kiss Subaru, but he pulled away too quickly. He swallowed, hot anticipation already rushing between his legs as he lay down in Subaru's bed and stared at the slice of light coming in through the door he'd left ajar. The silence seemed to tauten and time seemed to stretch with every beat of his heart, until finally, the living room light shut off, plunging the room into almost total darkness.

Kamui gasped softly, feeling suddenly intensely aware of his body: his breath expanding and contacting his ribs, his mouth dry from alcohol and nerves, his erection half hard in his pants. Subaru reentered the room, pausing at the end of his bed to look Kamui up and down before shutting the door tightly and crossing the room to his computer.

"What are you doing?" Kamui asked, blinking in the sudden, blinding light from the monitor. In answer, music began to play from the speakers under the desk: a soft, spacey introduction, then soothing, open notes and a hip hop beat. Subaru shut off the monitor and came to lie on his back beside Kamui, who rolled over onto his side to face him. His eyes roved over Subaru, the shape of his body under his clothes, the way the lights caught everything so softly and beautifully. He felt himself get completely hard and moaned quietly. Subaru turned his head to look him in the face, exposing his neck, and Kamui inched closer and took his hand, getting a squeeze in return. They looked at each other in the soft golden light, the music playing quietly and the space between them begging, until Kamui couldn't take it anymore and kissed Subaru full on the lips. It was a chaste kiss, but his entire body lit up excitedly. He exhaled shakily through his nose, then pulled away. "Is that…?" He whispered, but Subaru just groaned and cupped the side of his face to pull him into another kiss.

Kamui shut his eyes tight, the touch and the kiss sending an intense wave of pleasure through his body. He moved his lips gently, though insistently, against Subaru's, trying to kiss him deeper. Subaru rolled over onto his side, his lips parting, and Kamui gasped and pressed his tongue inside. Subaru shivered and began to kiss back, still slowly and softly, and Kamui wrapped his arms around him, gripping his upper back before dragging his hands down. Subaru arched into the touch with a needy groan that made Kamui's erection pulse excitedly. He wanted to touch Subaru everywhere, kiss him and please him, make him arch and moan and gasp even more.

He pulled out of the kiss for a moment, but looking at Subaru was suddenly almost too much. He was flushed, his chest was rising and falling shallowly and his eyes were half-lidded and lustful. Kamui bit his lip, his entire body shuddering as fresh heat surged between his legs.

"Fuck," he moaned, softly, before burying his face in Subaru's neck.

"Are you okay?" He whispered, suddenly concerned. "I-" but his words dissolved into a moan as Kamui began to kiss his neck, moving up towards his ear.

"I'm fine," he breathed, and Subaru shivered. "Just…" Kamui's erection throbbed more insistently and he pressed his hips forward. Subaru just pulled him closer.

"Mm…" Kamui groaned and began to kiss Subaru's neck again, harder now. He took a deep breath in through his nose, smelling his hair, his cigarettes, his skin, and his body pulsed with need. He nosed gently against Subaru's ear, then bit down ever so softly. Subaru cried out and grabbed onto Kamui more tightly. He smiled against his ear, feeling a rush of excitement, then moved back to his neck. He bit down lightly on the hot, flushed skin and sucked tenderly. Subaru moaned, dug his fingers into Kamui's shoulders and thrust his hips forward. The noise, the response, everything, all shocked Kamui's nerves and he bit down harder, exhaling sharply through his nose, venting his desire.

Subaru cried out again, but Kamui pulled away this time, knowing another rush of excitement when he saw the bruise he'd left. He gazed, dark and lustful, into Subaru's face, and he shivered, his expression aroused and wanting. Kamui hesitated a moment, then rolled Subaru onto his back and climbed on top of him. Subaru gasped and spread his legs, allowing Kamui to settle between them.

Encouraged and more excited then ever, Kamui kissed Subaru hard on the lips and ran his hands up and down his chest, imaging he could feel his skin through the fabric of his shirt. Subaru groaned into his mouth, wrapped his arms around him and dragged his hands up and down his shoulders, his spine, his ass and the backs of his thighs. Kamui cried out softly and thrust his hips up against him, arousal radiating out through his body from all points of contact. He pulled out of their kiss for a moment, gasping, and Subaru caught his bottom lip between his teeth and sucked it. Kamui's erection throbbed and he thrust his hips up again, desperate for more sensation. Subaru gasped too and Kamui pulled away, propping himself up on his hands. They stared at each other, breathing hard, their expressions clouded with intense arousal.

"You're so hard," Subaru said in a constricted voice. Heat rushed up Kamui's chest, neck and face and he nodded, biting his lip. He began to rock his hips gently back and forth, grinding against Subaru, who let out a soft, needy cry.

"So are you," Kamui whispered, his voice also constricted.

"Fuck!" Subaru moaned, shutting his eyes tight and throwing his head back, looking almost pained again.

"Subaru?" Kamui asked, raising his voice slightly. "Are you okay?" Subaru swallowed and opened his eyes, his expression softening.

"I'm all right," he said. "I'm just," he continued, echoing Kamui. "We can only kiss," he said, as if reminding them both. Kamui nodded, his heart and erection throbbing simultaneously.

"I know." Subaru managed a small smile, which Kamui returned, then looked away, apparently thinking. He sighed heavily, and Kamui's eyes widened. "Do you want to stop?" He asked, his heart throbbing again. Subaru's expression tightened for a second, but then he nodded, looking relieved.

"This is enough." Kamui bit down on the inside of his lip. He was disappointed, but he obviously wouldn't push it. He climbed off of Subaru and lay on his back with his eyes closed. He breathed slowly and deeply, trying to force his body to calm down, though his erection was still twitching hopefully. He suddenly felt Subaru's hand in his and gave it a squeeze. They stayed like that another moment before Kamui opened his eyes and turned to Subaru. He was staring up at the ceiling and breathing deeply through parted lips, his profile glowing as it was backlit by the Christmas lights. The music Kamui hadn't noticed while they'd been kissing was still playing, soft and sensual male vocals and a deep, intense beat. He rolled over onto his side and brought their clasped hands up to his chest.

"Subaru?" He turned his head, the bite mark on his neck showing darkly against his pale skin, and smiled at their clasped hands.

"Sorry for stopping you," he said, and Kamui's eyes widened.

"It's fine!" He assured him, squeezing his hand. "Seriously, don't worry."

"I just, I don't want you to feel like you have to do anything before you're ready," Subaru explained. The words seemed to hit Kamui in two very different places. It was relieving, even though he wished he'd heard them from Fuuma rather than Subaru, but he wasn't inexperienced, and he liked Subaru so much, they could at least jerk each other off or something. Pulled in different directions, Kamui just squeezed Subaru's hand even tighter. "Kamui?"

"Yeah, sorry." He swallowed, hating to see Subaru looking so worried all of a sudden. He took a deep breath in, collecting his thoughts. "I really like you," he told Subaru firmly. "I'm totally okay just kissing." Subaru's face relaxed into a smile. "But, I have done all this before, so…" His voice trailed away and Subaru flushed deeply, but moved closer.

"You like me?" He asked, softly.

"I keep telling you," Kamui replied, a little impatiently.

"Sorry," Subaru said at once. "I just, I haven't," but he broke off and looked away. Kamui's chest constricted suddenly and painfully.

"Have things been fucked up for you too?" He asked, tentatively, and Subaru laughed humorlessly.

"You could say that." Kamui's heart throbbed in his tightened chest and he rubbed their clasped hands against his cheek. Subaru watched, his eyes wide as though taken aback by the tenderness.

"Me too," Kamui replied, quietly, looking at Subaru very seriously. "But, I'm okay to try again, you don't have to," he paused, trying to think of the best way to say this. "I like you, and I'm here," he said, finally. Yes, that felt right. He blushed, but stared determinedly back at Subaru, who stared back, his eyes huge in the soft semi-darkness. He seemed about to say something, but then just moaned and kissed him on the lips. Kamui took a sharp breath in through his nose, but Subaru pulled away almost at once. He let go of Kamui's hand, sat up and yanked his blankets up to cover both of them. Kamui watched, confused, but then Subaru opened his arms wide, inviting him into an embrace. Kamui's heart skipped and he smiled broadly and crawled forward to curl up beside him. Subaru rolled onto his back, pulling Kamui to lie across his chest.

"Is this okay?" He asked, and Kamui threw his arm and leg across him, snuggling deeper into his neck.

"Yeah!" It had been a long time since he'd cuddled this way, and he'd forgotten just how good it felt. Subaru kissed him tenderly on the top of the head.

"Are you comfortable?"

"Mmhmm." Kamui closed his eyes and relaxed deeper against Subaru. "This feels good."

"It does." Kamui smiled softly.

"Good night," he whispered.

"Good night."


ALL RIGHT THEN. What do you guys think? Good call? Bad call? Truly? I'm still conflicted myself.

I think of reviews when I summon my kekkai, leave me some!