Chapter 8: Comedy of Terror
On a sunny day, the girls are at the park having some ice cream. Since they don't have much homework and crime fighting, they decide that it will be a perfect day to relax, have a snack, and go have fun.
"This is really good," Blossom happily says licking the ice cream.
Then Bridget asks, "What you wanna do?"
"How about we do some shopping? I think it's a good idea to get you some new clothes here," Bubbles suggests.
"I guess?" Bridget questions.
Buttercup then looks confused, and says, "Hey check that out."
The others look at the same direction to see a man wearing a male style kimono walking past them with a radio. Curious they look to see him stopping at the ice cream stand.
"He must really like ice cream," Blossom says.
"I wonder what's he doing?" Bridget asks.
The man puts a pillow down and sits on it. Then he turns the radio on. The girls stare to see what the man is doing.
The man happily says, "Mam, you look like someone who likes to laugh."
"What is that guy a comedian or something?" Buttercup asks looking confused.
"I'll bet he's really funny," Bubbles replies.
The others look at Bubbles with a unsure look, opposite on what Bubbles is thinking.
"I don't see comedians dressed like that," Bridget comments.
They hear the man says, "My bicycle fell over and I said 'how come you can't stand up?' 'I'm two tired to get up' it said. Get it?"
Blossom and Buttercup groan as they fall off of their seat. Bridget is having trouble getting the joke, and can imagine the guy having a cuckoo bird on his head.
However, Bubbles asks, "But how could a bicycle get tired?"
"I think it's supposed to be a punchline. You know like how bicycles have two tires. So when he said two tired, he's talking about how bikes have two tires," Bridget hypothesize.
"Oh I get it," bubbles replies. Then falls off her seat as well.
"That's got to be the worst joke ever," Buttercup replies.
Just then, the girl at the stand begin to laugh at his joke.
Shocked, Blossom says, "No way! She laughed!"
"What's the matter with her," Buttercup agrees.
"Let's not pay attention at them," Bridget says.
"Um guys, your ice cream is going to melt," Bubbles replies.
Just then, the man tells another joke, "What did the hat say to the rack?"
"You stay here and I'll go on a head," The man answers.
The girls groan, and Blossom and Buttercup fall off their seat again.
"That is so lame," Buttercup replies.
"This guy's a total weirdo, and the worse comedian," Blossom adds.
Bridget looks at Bubbles with a confused look, "What's up Bubbles, don't you get the joke?"
Bubbles begin to laugh with a smile on her face.
"You think it's funny?" Blossom asks in shock.
"But it is," Bubbles says.
The girls then another laughter, Buttercup turns and finds the source, "It looks like someone agrees with you."
The girls turn to see the ice cream girl is laughing at his joke. Bridget and the others look confused, and can't understand why those two are the only ones thinking this joke is funny.
Just then, they hear someone shouting, "Hey mister funny man, there's no line near the ice cream stand!"
Everyone look to see an elderly man is riding on the bike a full speed, and stops at the ice cream stand.
He man happily introduces himself," My name is Reinhold…"
"I must say your daughter's ice cream is the best in town," Reinhold adds having hearts on his eyes.
However, the older man grabs his head and shouts, "I scream, I'll make you scream!"
The older man looks like he is trying to squish Reinhold's head like an orange.
The girls runs over and pushes the two apart, "Daddy, quit it!"
"I don't want here it now go home!" the ice cream man yells.
"Fine," The ice cream girl leaves, and not very happy.
Once the girl is gone, Reinhold feels a bit bad for what happened.
He turns towards the man, bows his head, and says, "Forgive me sir."
"Just get out of here okay, you're scaring my customers," the ice cream man firmly says.
"But… I only want is to make the world a happier place," Reinhold reasons.
"That's nuts," the ice cream man says.
But Reinhold is not giving up, "Just hear me out."
However the ice cream man still refuse, and says, "I have no time for this! If you want to tell your jokes, tell it to somebody else cause I prefer real theater, got it!"
"Telling jokes is a serious form of theater," Reinhold clarifies.
"Says who? If you ask me they oughta make it with tragedy and drama," the ice cream man mocks.
"What will make you happy then?" Reinhold asks.
"I will make me happy to see… kabuki drama!" The ice cream man answers.
"You gotta be kidding! Not that stuff with the makeup and the crazy costume!" Reinhold shockley protests.
Then Reinhold does a pose, "Forget it, that stuff is way to serious for me! I'm a comedian!"
Not very happy with Reinhold's idea of funny, the ice cream man furiously shouts, "I'll give you serious!"
The ice cream man kicks Reinhold so hard that he start flying in the air. The next thing, Reinhold end up face first inside the trash can at the otherside of the park and is knocked out cold. What no one suspects one of Him's black spore just happen to be near close by, and see an opportunity to cause problems.
As the spores surround the unconscious man, "Him's voice appears saying, "My black dust will make you a new man."
The dark light disappears, and a different person has taken Reinhold's place. He now wearing a theater orange kimono with a black vest, green pants with a red clot, white socks. His hair change to purple and long. His face and hands are white, with red marking at the eyes, and black lips. He has become a Kabuki monster.
He then calls out, "I… am a modern thespian."
At the park, the girls are still eating their ice cream. When they see the kabuki man hops on one foot past them. The girls turn to see the strange person hopping towards the ice cream stand with the man still there.
The ice cream man looks at the mysterious person suspiciously, and ask, "Are you here for the ice cream?"
"No… I am here to offer you serious theater," The kabuki man answers, sitting with his knees and arms crossed.
"This I gotta see," The ice cream says, looking stern and curious.
The kabuki man gets up and dramatically says, "I will show you tragedy to move your spirit and spill your soul. Oh you shall weep. Prepare yourself, that your tears will flow with so much force, that a great salty torrent will flood the city."
The ice cream turns his head away and says, "Yeah, you got some screws loose."
Not taken with the insult, the kabuki man fire purple beam from his and shouts," Misery Beam!"
The ice cream man is hit by the beam, and the next moment he cries like there's no tomorrow. Tears are coming down from his eyes like a waterfall. The kabuki man then hops away on one food.
Blossom gaps, "What happened?"
"He made that man cry! That wasn't very nice," Bubbles says, not very pleased.
"I think we got trouble. He's admitting a dark aura," Bridget says.
Then Buttercup adds, "And I though his jokes were bad enough."
The four girls then fastly eat their ice cream so they can transform and save the day. One by one, the kabuki monster continues to zap people and make them cry up a storm.
"I'd say we transform," Blossom says.
"I agree," Bridget replies.
"I don't know, what if he made us cry too?" Bubbles asks in concern.
"Let him try. I don't cry for anything," Buttercup says with a determined look on his face.
Having her communicator, and ring glowing, Blossom calls out, "Blossom!" and is starting to transform.
Just then, the Kabuki man taps her, and Blossom begins to cry too. Sadly, she can't transform in tears.
Blossom whines, "I'm too sad to fight.
Bubbles does the same and tries to transform.
Bubbles calls out, "Bubbles!"
Sadly, the kabuki monster zaps Bubbles too, and is crying with Blossom.
"This is like the time that I found the perfect outfit and didn't have my size!" Bubbles cries.
Now it's Buttercup's turn. She calls out, "Buttercup!"
But zap… the kabuki monster hits her too.
In tears, Buttercup says, "This… is… humiliating!"
Finally Bridget tries to transform herself, "Bridget!"
The kabuki man zaps her again so she can cry. However, Bridget end up not crying. Confused, the kabuki monster zaps her multiple times, but can never get Bridget to cry. He decides to ignore her, and hop away with a somewhat smile on his face.
Bridget runs up to the girls, and asks in concern, "ARe you girls arlight?"
"No. We need to transform to stop that monster," Blossom says in tears.
"But we can't while we're crying," Bubbles adds.
Then Buttercup asks, "How come you're not crying?"
"I don't know. That monster zapped me multiple times and it didn't do anything," Bridget explains, looking confused.
Then Bridget says, "I'll call the professor to help us out."
Back at the lab the screen goes on and Bridget is one the screen. Sadly, she can see the three sleeping on the table.
"Professor, Ken, Peach, the girls need your help. There's a monster out here and the girls need help transforming," Bridget explains.
Sadly Peach holds up a sigh. Bridget reads, "Sleeping? Do not Disturb?"
"They must have been stayed up late last night," Blossom whines.
"Fine time for a nap," Buttercup says.
"They need some sleep too," Bubbles says.
"Sadly, we need to stop that crazy makeup wearing comedian before he caused everyone to flood the city," Bridget.
Sadly, it's already happening. People are crying so much that the city is becoming flooded by their own tears, and everyone are being swept by the current. Acting fast, bridget is able to transform and fly in the air to save as much people as she can. Then pulls her cord down, and Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup grab it. Then Bridget fish them out and put them on top of the building. Then sets to work on saving everyone else.
On top of one of the poles, the kabuki man is satisfied with his work, and says, "Not everyone is going to no the meaning of cry me a river."
The black aura begin to admit from his body. Still at the lab and sleeping, Peach catches a whiff of the black z rays.
"Hey Ken," Peach says, still sleeping.
Then Ken mumbles, "Black z rays."
"Right, send in the girls," Professor Utonium replies, still sleeping.
Still sleeping, Peach sits up, and call out, "PowerPuff Girls Z da wan wan!"
Back at the city, the town is starting to get flooded by people's tears. Bridget tries her best to save as much of the citizens as she can. However, she is starting to get tired. On one of the buildings, the girls continue crying, until they hear their belt buckles beeping.
Bubbles is the first to notice, "look guys, Peach finally responded."
"Good, then let's get this guy and help Bridget," buttercup says.
Quickly the three girls transform to their PowerPuff form. Bridget has finish rescuing the rest of the citizens when she see the glow of the transformation. After transforming, the girls join Bridget to put a stop to the kabuki monster once and for all.
After reaching the pole where the monster is, Bridget shouts, "Guess who back?!"
The monster becomes confused and turn around.
"Bridget, Bubbles, Buttercup, and Blossom, the PowerPuffs, "the girls announce, doing the pose and bringing out their weapons.
"The Power who now?" The kabuki man asks.
Then he says, "I'm sorry, but I don't give autographs. So leave me so I can watch the world drown in its' own tears."
"No way!" the girls shout in anger.
"Then look into my eyes. Misery Beam!" The kabuki monster says.
The monster tries to hit the girls, but keep missing. The girls try to attack him, but the monster keep zapping them.
Bridget groans, "I can't get a lock on him. He keep trying to attack us."
"What do we do?" Bubbles asks.
"And we better come up with it fast," Buttercup adds.
Blossom ends up with an idea, "I think I know how. You all remember that he is the same man who was telling all those jokes."
"Yes," The girls nod their heads.
"Well, deep inside he is still the same guy. We just need to appeal to his funny bone," Blossom explains.
Bridget gets the idea, "So we need to tell joke to him and get him to laugh."
"That's a great idea," Bubbles happily replies.
"To save the day, we'll have to tell bad jokes, "Blossom declares.
"Looks like we're fighting fire with fire," Bridget says.
"Oh boy," Buttercup groans.
The girls fly so they can put their plan into motion. Meanwhile, everyone continues to cry as their town continue to flood with their own tears. The kabuki guy turns around to see the four girls dressed in kimonos and are sitting on pillows with their hands and head on it.
Blossom lifts her head up, and says, "WE got a joke for you. Do you know there are some fish who like to watch t.v?"
Bubbles holds out a fan, "Buttercup, tell us what a fish's favorite show is."
Buttercup slowly lifts her head, and says feeling embarrassed, "Name that tuna."
"Get it," Bridget adds.
The girls and the kabuki monster stare at each other quietly. The girls are wondering if their plan work. Suddenly, the kabuki monster… begins to laugh that tears are coming out. The girls ditch the disguises and decide to finish him off.
Blossom shouts, "Alright girls, let's finish this."
"Yeah!" The girls chant.
Blossom calls out, "Yo yo spin!"
"Bubble catcher!" Bubbles shout.
"Sonic swing," Buttercup adds.
Then Bridget calls out, "Harmony sound wave!"
One by one, the girls attack hit the kabuki monster and fall into the water. Back at the lab, the two scientists and little dog wake up to see what is happening on the screen. Soon everyone stop crying, and the tear water drain away. Once the water is gone, the girls can see the monster is out cold. The professor's car roll in, and he along with Ken and Peach run out to see the man. Quickly, the professor uses the ray to expose the z rays on the man, and changes him back to normal.
Just then, the ice cream man rides his bike fast as she screams, "Please, help me!"
The ice cream man screeches on his bike and comes to a stop in front of the group.
"My daughter is washed away into the canal," The ice cream man cries in fear.
Reinhold wakes up to hear what the man, and declares as he runs, "I'll save here."
In the canal full of water, the ice cream girl is trying her best to stay on the surface, and can't beat the current.
She cries, "Help me! Help! Someone help, I can't swim!"
Reinhold reach the bridge to see the girl being swept away by the current. Desperate to save her he jumps in the river and swims towards her. He swims fast enough to catch her, and speedly swims against the current to bring her back to shore.
Later in the evening, Reinhold is able to reach the staircase and manage to get the girl to safety.
The girl looks up and asks, "Who are you?"
REinhold looks abit confused, and asks, "You… don't remember?"
The girls look at the one who save her and smile. Reinhold smiles back and help her up. The girls watch to see the two are happy to be together.
The next day, Bridget is walking around town on her own and listening to her music. She also agree to do some shopping for her mom. Something has been bothering her since yesterday. She remembers what everyone has been zapped by the kabuki monster and start crying. But when he hits Bridget, she hasn't cry at all.
"It's so weird. Everyone else started crying after being zapped, and yet I did. Why was I the only one? Even the girls were affected," Bridget says to herself in her thoughts.
As bridget walks to the store, she isn't aware that she is being watched. A black spore watches Bridget from the far, and sees the black and white aura admitting form inside her. Whatever the reason, this girl has the spore curious.
