Chapter 9 \\ New Year's Eve \\ WICELA
Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter series nor everything that comes with it. The rights go to J.K. Rowling. The only things I own are the holes in her stories that I filled with my fantasies.
A/N: OKAY so I have no excuse to be this late with a chapter, really. I could explain everything, but I wouldn't call it a "good excuse" (try being busy, senior prom and school trip to Prague, but still…). I'm so sorry and I hope I didn't ruin your moods to enjoy this story – xo WICELA
Lily was glad to be home again. It was a small apartment, which she'd left for half a year. Small, but never to small for Lily, although she perhaps had to rethink that, now she was going to be a mum. A mum. She was going to be a mum. Lily stroked her hand on her belly. It had been so unrealistic when she realized she was pregnant, but there had always been a reason to deny the whole thing. She could've gone mad or she wasn't thinking straight after her break-up with Lorcan. She even had a reason to explain why her belly was growing – chocolate was always her favorite when she was sad. But now she had no choice. Hearing the doctors confirming her pregnancy made her more scared than ever. She knew she had to talk to her parents and to Hugo, Albus and Rose. Her friends perhaps and last but not totally least, Lorcan. People were asking her if Lorcan was the dad. They assumed that she could've enjoyed the single life and didn't watch out. People assumed everything. Her boss assumed also a lot of things. Loads of letters were lying on her kitchen table. All written in her boss's terrible handwriting, telling her that she couldn't just "take off" like she did. Well, that wasn't something she hadn't realized already. The last letter was a Howler and as soon as Lily opened it, Pansy Parkinson started to scream.
"LILY POTTER! YOU ARE HEREBY FIRED; I WILL TALK ABOUT THIS WITH THE MINISTRY AND DON'T THINK YOUR RICH DADDY CAN HELP YOU OUT OF THIS. IF I SEE YOUR FACE EVER AGAIN I WILL PERSONALLY ENSURE IT WILL BE THE LAST TIME I'LL EVER SEE YOU!"
Lily had never really stopped working. She had done a lot of research for her department in the place where she had been living. Luckily, her boss had still accepted her pieces. Unfortunately, her boss's revenge was gossip columns that weren't really going the way she'd wanted them. Lily tucked the letters away and sat down on her couch for a while. Quietly she enjoyed being back again. Seeing her friends and family and knowing that they'd missed her and wouldn't judge her. Seeing Lorcan again had been the only thing she couldn't handle really well. It had been a torture for her to see him. Even though he'd kissed her, she knew it could've meant nothing. They always had this kind of…thing that bonded them. That thing had kept her from breaking up with him, because she loved him too much. Leaving him had broken her, but it had been the right thing too, because their bonding thing was gone. She had told herself that she didn't need to get back together with Lorcan. She could easily see him with another girl, because it didn't matter anymore. She was taking life in her own hands and not sharing it with him, but it all didn't matter anymore. That kiss had discarded everything. She was ready to throw everything away, just for him. Now she was home again. In her own house again. Alone. She immediately realized how less time she'd been spending in her house. Lorcan's house had been bigger and she almost lived there, even though she loved her own place. Her own space reminded her of what her life – her life that included her friends and family – had been when she was alone. She had never been single before she ran away and perhaps it was good to be single for a while, even though Lorcan was very close. She had been away for half a year; it was possible he had a girlfriend or that he didn't want to see her again – certainly after their kiss. She needed distance from him and if that would mean she would see him with another girl, than that would happen. Perhaps it was better for everyone to not know who the real father of her child was. Perhaps she would be able to ignore it too.
:: :: ::
It was unexpectedly easy for Lily to fit in her old life again. When she talked to her boss, she mumbled something like being on her period – or the lack of being on her period – when she wrote that letter. She started weekly diners with her parents on Friday and when her brothers heard of it, they came by when they could make it. For Albus it meant that he actually came by, for James it meant he appreciated the offer, but was too busy to care. Even though James really was busy, they'd other cousins with Quidditch jobs and they weren't as half as busy as he was. His teammates mostly told her that girls were part of his job. Lily wasn't really disappointed in James. He had always been this way and it made it much more special when he did come. He wasn't the person you wanted to be with every day – she had experience and it didn't really end well. James and Albus had always been like water and fire. Lily hopped from one to the other; it really depended on her mood. James was always there to party and Albus was more for the midnight conversations about the deep serious stuff. Lily loved them no matter what and she knew that, even though they had their own things, they would always care. Her parents cared too and they were glad when Lily suddenly stopped by. When she came the week after and the week after that again, the tradition was started. Saturday evening was the evening that Lily went to the pub with Hugo. It had been an old tradition and they picked it up as soon as Lily was back. Even though Lily couldn't drink any alcoholic drinks, she still partied. Most times Hugo was kind enough to not drink either – except for those three times Lily became his sober friend. But, Lily forgave him, because he had a fair enough reason to do so. Being dumped and fired in the same week had been kind of a bummer. The only cousin that Lily was close to and didn't really saw often was Rose. Of course there were reasons for it – she had been closer to her house than ever since the judge spoke. Everywhere Lily heard people speak about her and it really took everything to not defend Rose. She knew Rose was going to a rough time. Getting dead threats and having a bodyguard because of it wasn't nothing. Thereby was the tension between her and Scorpius could even a stranger notice. There were so many things happening between the two of them that Lily didn't know and Rose probably wasn't aware of. Catching up with her was difficult when the subject of their conversation walked in every second. Rose's face turned red every time she caught him looking at her. The more awkward the situation became, the more her blush spread. Scorpius's had seen that too and his eyes flickered. Lily rolled her eyes, as she knew he was probably thinking about where that blush was heading. They liked each other. Hell, they were probably head over heels already, but they were both afraid to admit it. Seeing their budding bloom for love was something she'd missed. She'd missed teasing them, because even though Rose made a habit of denying it, they were seeing much of each other even when Scorpius wasn't her bodyguard. They just needed a little push and Lily was planning on giving them that when the time was right.
:: :: ::
It was Friday evening and Albus was sitting next to his sister on the couch. His father just told them how Rose was doing and his mother made them drinks. When she came back and shared them, she shook her head.
"Albus, are you okay?" she asked worried. She sat down next to him on the couch and looked him deep in the eye.
"Euhm, no, it's nothing, just a bit tired," he answered quickly. He looked away and saw Lily staring at him with her eyes wide open. She knew what was happening. She knew what was wrong.
"I'm sorry Al, but I can't give you any more time off or another kind of job, because we need you right now," his father told him. Albus nodded. Another job was the least thing he wanted. He just wanted to rest.
"Harry! Look at him, this isn't healthy!" his mother defended him. He tried to smile, to not show he was suffering, but his mother always saw the true him.
"I know you're busy and everything, but this isn't alright!"
"It's good for him to work with this kind of situations. It wasn't always easy for me when I started working and so it won't be for Al, but he shouldn't give up!" His father and mother went on and on about whether it was healthy enough to have a job right now and Albus couldn't hold it in anymore.
"I'M GAY, OKAY?" he shouted and everyone was silent. After a minute of dodging the eyes, Lily hugged him.
"I'm proud of you," she whispered in his ear. When he looked up, his mother was staring at him with tears in her eyes.
"It's okay, darling, it's okay!" she told him and she smiled. Then came the most confronting person. He didn't even want to look at his father, but then he did. His father smiled at him too and walked towards him.
"You know, when you were younger, you were afraid we would all hate you if you would end up in Slytherin, but we didn't. We love you, just the way you are and not a version you think we want you to be. We want you to be happy, Albus, and if you're happier this way, we accept that." Albus didn't expect that. He got tears in his eyes and looked at his father.
"Do you mean that?" he asked him and his father nodded.
"Of course I do. We all do," he answered.
"But Al, what's wrong then?" his mother asked.
"It's okay, just tell us," she said and he nodded. He looked at his family and smiled, but thinking about Eric was a killing thought.
"Euhm…Eric and I had a relationship for quite a long time and…well…he didn't want to hide anymore and I wasn't ready to tell you everything. It's so…final when you tell everyone about it. You suddenly have to deal with everyone staring at you, because you're gay or because you're the gay son of the Chosen One. It's just…everything was perfect when we were together and I didn't want to share that and now, he broke up with me, because I wasn't ready yet and…and I felt like…like nothing. Empty." There were several remarks when he mentioned Eric's name, but after that, everyone was perfectly silent. No one who said something like 'I KNEW IT!' or 'you LIVED with that guy!'
"I think I can understand both perspectives. As I understand, you two were together even when you lived together, right?" Albus nodded.
"I understand why he didn't want to hide anymore, but I also understand why you wasn't ready. I really want to say that he should've had the patience to wait for you to be ready, but I don't think that's fair, I mean: who knows when you would come out? It's not fair to pressure you, but it is totally understandable." His mother stroked his hair like when he was younger, but he didn't say anything about it. He wanted to be a little boy again. That little boy had been as afraid of failing as he was now. Then, he was afraid to end up in Slytherin, now he was afraid to not fit in. Being unique in his world wasn't something to be proud of. In a normal family, people would judge you a bit, but accept you later, but he wasn't part of a normal family. His father was the Chosen One and even though he didn't see himself as a special person, the rest of the world did saw him as one.
"Look Al, we will all be there when the news hit the papers. We will all support you. Lily and I will see what we can do about the papers and the rumors – Pansy Parkinson doesn't have all the power she thinks she has – and everyone else who's ready to judge you, is just some jealous person who isn't as brave as you. Al, never forget: you never were a Gryffindor at Hogwarts, but you have Gryffindor trades in you. You're brave, Al, really brave," his mother said and she hugged him tight.
"We're so proud of you, son," his father said and they smiled.
"You should talk to Eric someday, though," Lily answered laughingly and Albus groaned.
"Not if you're present."
:: :: ::
As the time went past, Helga and Frank slowly slipped into a rhythm. Eating breakfast together, going to work, being home late and so tired that a goodnight kiss had to do. Even in the weekends they were both very busy. Helga was on her way to become a real Healer and spent more time with Kelsey than they did when they lived together. They had met when they started with the Healer program and never stopped liking each other. Kelsey was completely infiltrated in their circle of friends and there were those evenings when Kelsey and Rose were both so drunk, because they were too single to stay sober. It was nice to spent so much time with Kelsey now Rose was locked into her own house. She and Frank still visited her every Monday evening – sometimes Kelsey joined, if only to flirt with Scorpius. But then there were the evenings when they both weren't working and just sitting there, staring at the TV – a muggle thing that Rose really loved. The "honeymoon"-time was over and now there was just this big I-take-you-for-granted-situation. Instead of flirting with each other, it was like "Do you want to have sex?" and the other person said "yes" and then they would walk to the bedroom and have sex. Nothing romantic.
"Frank?" she said. It was a TV evening again and she really hated it.
"Hmm?" he answered, while looking in some kind of weird magazine. Helga threw the magazine out of his hands and stared at him.
"Hey! I was reading that!" Frank exclaimed. He wasn't really angry, but just…surprised.
"I think we need to get out of our rhythm," she said and she saw the surprise on his face growing.
"Why? What's wrong with it?" he answered.
"Frank, I want to go out with you, to see the world, to do special things. We're becoming two old persons already and it's not right. We're getting boring!" she said. She didn't want to look at him and stared thereby at their newish bank.
"We're not getting boring, Helga, we're just both very busy with work! Why don't we plan a vacation or something?" he suggested.
"But we don't have any money! We just bought a house!" she said. Her voice skipped a bit and Frank raised his eyebrow.
"Are you okay?" he asked her. Worriedly, he pulled her towards him.
"You look a bit pale?" he added and seconds after that, she fought her way out of his grip.
"Toilet! Toilet!" she screamed and Frank run after her.
"Shit, not again!" she muttered when she'd cleaned herself up.
"Not again? How many times have you thrown up lately?" Frank asked and she smiled without meaning it.
"Too often. I think I'm getting sick or something and I'm sorry, I think it's why I got mad at you," she said. He hugged her and gave her a kiss.
"It's not a problem, but what is a problem, is that you're sick, so you're going to a Healer, or you're staying home for a bit," he said firmly.
"Is it alright if I go to Healer Jordan?" she grinned, but he shook his head.
"No, Healer Jordan is too sick to work," he answered and she grinned.
"O well, okay then," she answered.
"But, it's smelling in here, so let's go to some place where no one puked," he grinned, lifting her and carrying her to the bedroom.
"Getting bored, already?" he whispered in her ear. Helga laughed and kissed him.
"Never."
:: :: ::
Rose loved her friends. Rose loved that her friends got new friends and introduced them to her. Rose loved their new friends. But Rose hated Kelsey. For many years Kelsey and Rose got along perfectly fine. They were funny, they were laughing and they shared the most amazing secrets. Still, that last Monday when Kelsey came along with Frank and Helga, Rose started to hate her. She was so full of herself. So many times flirting with Scorpius and he reacted. Not that she cared that he reacted, but still, if they would become a couple, they would have sex in her house and that was not what she wanted. The way Kelsey was throwing herself into him was pathetic. Almost like she was hopeless and thought that Scorpius would be perfect new boyfriend material. Everybody knew that he wasn't good boyfriend material. He was just a player and he had a reputation. Not that she cared, but they weren't even good together. She liked so many other things than him, like…like…having a steady boyfriend instead of having a one-night-stand or the-fling-of-the-week. No, they definitely weren't good together. She hated it when he asked her something about Kelsey. She hated it when he talked about her. She hated it when he noticed her. She wasn't jealous or something, of course she wasn't, but the thought of him having something with Kelsey, made her want to throw up. Scorpius would only ruin Kelsey and she didn't want that for her friend. Yes, that certainly had to be it. So she hated Scorpius instead. But…he had been nice to her. They had become friends. Sort of friends. He had comforted her when she had felt like nothing. He had been a good friend. Was that his job or was it just him? Why did he confuse her so much?
