Sorry this took SO long, but I've been extremely busy with school and majorly stressed! SO sorry guys, honestly!
The weekend made it easier for Jesse and Rachel to get everything together. She awoke in his arms, happily content, but reluctant to get up. She stirred, not wanting to get up, but waking him up in the process. He laughed at her whines and held on to her a moment longer before sitting up. Rachel, not wanting to give up her entire routine, checked her phone. 5 new messages.
She frowned.
"Is something wrong?" he asked, watching her sift through the messages. They both knew who it would be and could only imagine what they contained.
"Rachel?" Jesse pressed again, this time much lighter.
"Hmm? Sorry...it's just...it doesn't matter." she shrugged. They also both knew she was lying. It mattered. It always mattered. It just hung on how much. Jesse watched her worried eyes glance back to her phone, and leaned in to kiss her cheek. She turned to face him and hugged him tight. He didn't want to lose her, not after he'd gotten so close. But how could he keep her from someone she obviously wasn't ready to let go of - someone who had helped her and made her a better and stronger person when he tore her down?
"I'm sorry, Rachel. None of this should've...should have happened." he swallowed, his heart heavy. Jesse spoke over her shoulder, pressing his face into her neck and shoulder and crying. He wasn't going to sit around and pretend everything could be okay. Rachel tightened upon hearing his cries and rubbed his back gently. She tousled his hair and kissed his neck and collar gently. He felt so ashamed, but so thankful as well. He breathed in heavily before pulling back to smile at her.
Noah sat in his bed, his phone in his hands, waiting. Just waiting. He was anxious for Rachel's reply. He wasn't sure why he sent them and he didn't even know if he meant what he said or even how he felt at this point, but he wanted an answer. He dug his nails into the skin on his knuckles, anxious. Noah refused to do anything until he heard from Rachel. His stomach churned just imagining her with Jesse.
He allowed the pain in his stomach to continue until he imagined their kiss...He shoved his phone in his pocket and headed out the door towards her house. He knew it was dangerous for everyone considering that Rachel wouldn't be able to restrain him, but it was a risk he was willing to take.
"Don't you think you should answer him? I mean you don't have to tell me anything, but I think he'd like a response." Jesse suggested as Rachel fidgeted with her phone.
"Maybe...I don't know..." They both grew silent as there was a knock at the door. Jesse watched Rachel's eyes, still scared and stressed and rose to his feet. He headed downstairs and took a deep breath before opening the door. He could hear Rachel on the steps behind him. Jesse slowly opened the door. Mistake.
Puck was on him in a second, pinning him with his knees while he swung at his face. Rachel's screams and swats finally calmed him enough to help Jesse up and to even help clean him up.
"Listen, dude, I'm sorry. I just still haven't got over the whole thing yet." Noah said throwing the bloody paper towel away.
"It's alright. I understand" Jesse nodded.
"What are you doing here, though? Didn't you wear that yesterday..." Puck finally came to the realization and luckily caught himself from swinging again. Instead he headed to the door.
"Dammit Noah! Could you just stop it for one second? I mean honestly, haven't I been through enough that I don't need you starting anymore trouble? I mean of course I appreciate what you've done for me and what you've been for me but can you please stop acting so immature?" Rachel was frustrated. Jesse stared in disbelief. Noah stopped.
"Rachel...I'm-" He started
"No. Save it, Noah. This is just too much. I'd really appreciate it if you left right now." Noah stared at her longingly, then turned, his head down, and walked out her door.
Jesse walked towards her and touched her arm. She turned to look at him, then headed to the freezer and got him some ice.
"Rachel" he held her wrist just as she applied the ice to the side of his mouth.
"What?" she looked deep into his eyes, searching for an answer, but it was useless. She just got lost, over and over again. He was quite for a long while.
"Je-" he touched his finger to her lips.
"Shh" he whispered. He slowly stood up with her help and looked down into her eyes. He leaned in slowly to touch his lips to her forehead. She rested her head on his chest and stayed silent as he told her to. Slowly, but surely, she began to calm down. Her breath staggered and instead of huffs, came long, deep breaths. She pulled back to look up at him.
"Okay?" he asked, a smiling playing at his once bloody lips. She nodded, laughing briefly. The worry soon returned to her eyes, but he held her together. He was never going to let her fall apart.
She took deep breaths, Jesse by her side in the warm car, the radio's volume low, almost inaudible. They were parked outside the school and were staring at each other seriously.
"Are you sure you're ready to do this?" he squeezed her shoulder, then slid his hand down her arm to hold her hand. "Rachel?"
She lifted her opposite hand and opened the door. Jesse smiled proudly. He walked with her through the halls, hand wrapped around her waist lightly and delicately. Once they reached Rachel's locker, he turned her around.
"Listen, I'm gonna be late for class. I'll come back during my lunch to see you at Glee okay?" He stared into her eyes which were sad momentarily, then soon smiled back at him.
"Okay, Jesse." he smiled at the sound of his name from her lips and he kissed her forehead. She hugged tightly to his chest, unwilling to let go, but slowly slid from his grip.
He stared at her a moment longer and began to walk away.
"Wait, Jesse!" he quickly turned at the sound of his name coming from the tiny girl. She wrapped her arms around him once more and he held her tightly back.
"Okay...I-I'm sorry. I just had to do that one more time." she admitted. He kissed her cheek this time and held her hand before slipping away from her fingertips.
Her image lingered in his mind as he mindlessly taught his classes. They seemed to go by so quickly. He wondered if he even taught, or if he was rambling off nothing and slurring and mumbling through his sentences - that is if they were sentences. He rested his head on his fingertips as he sat at his desk during his free period. He just couldn't believe he saw Rachel with Jesse earlier that morning. It made his stomach churn with anxiety.
God, why? he seemed to ask himself over and over. He had hurt her so badly and now he thinks he can just walk back into her life and pretend everything's okay? Damn. The sound of the bell startled him, but he couldn't escape from his thoughts. He walked to Glee, thoughts still intact and running his mind. He sat down, just looking at each of the kids. He watched their interactions, their mannerisms. He scanned the room for Rachel - and found someone unexpected. Jesse was sitting by her, arm around her shoulder, and laughing about something or another. It took all Will had not to punch him in the face.
"Jesse, what are you doing here?" Will stood up, speaking sternly, protectively.
"Oh, Mr. Schuester, I'm sorry. I-I thought you knew. If you want me to leave, I understand." he spoke innocently and all was quiet. Everyone stared at Will and Rachel fidgeted slightly.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, just walking in here and thinking everything's okay?" he stepped closer to the man, but kept his distance, trying to force back his impulses. Everything he thought was coming out and he didn't need it expressed through violence.
"I know I screwed up, I-I screwed up royally and I'm sorry. I just wanted to be here for Rachel." Jesse stood, glancing back to Rachel.
"You've got a lot of nerve coming back here, you know." Mr. Schue said angrily.
"Sure, Mr. Schue, maybe he does, but you're wrong about him. He screwed up, sure, but we all do. I mean I would know. Fuck, would I know. You don't have to take it out on him just because he isn't God damn perfect. I know things haven't been so easy for you either, so I don't understand why the hell you'd blame him." Everyone grew silent as Noah spoke. After eyes drifted from him, they all landed on Mr. Schue. He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth for a moment, then released the tension. He looked at the group of kids in front of him.
"Rachel, you're in charge." he mumbled under his breath seriously.
"What?" she asked, confused as to what he was speaking of.
"You heard me. Just do this for me, okay?" he said only slightly louder. He walked out of the room after grabbing his coat and headed out the door.
The club was more silent than they had been before. Rachel stood up, but Jesse grabbed her wrist.
"Rachel, you don't have to do this." he pleaded.
"No, you're right. The difference is I want to." she smiled before shaking off his hand which had grown limp. "Okay. Scales. We need to warm up." Rachel bounced to the center of the room.
"But what about Mr. Schue? Shouldn't someone check on him?" Mercedes questioned. Rachel thought a moment.
"I'll do it. I need to set things right." Jesse said.
"I won't let you go alone. I'm coming, too." Rachel said.
"Wait, if you both go, who's going to run this Hell hole?" Santana scoffed sarcastically.
"I can do it. I mean I'm just as good as Berry over there." Mercedes smiled.
"Thanks, Mercedes. We owe you one." Rachel smiled touching her arm lightly.
"I'm gonna hold you to that I hope y'all know." she laughed. They both smiled slightly before rushing out the door to find their broken teacher and friend. It wasn't hard. He was slouched against a pole in the parking lot, sitting on the curb.
"Oh, Mr. Schue!" Rachel called as she ran to his side. He sighed in annoyance. "Oh, Mr. Schue." she wrapped her arms around his neck quickly. "I'm so sorry." He hugged her back, then let them help him up on his feet.
"No...I- uh- overreacted." he said, staring at Jesse, definitely unsure of what he was saying and obviously not being genuine. He did look like a wreck, though. His hair didn't seem as perfect and he had circles under his eyes which meant he hadn't been sleeping, still worrying about her. Rachel studied his face. He does care about me. I'm the reason why he can't sleep. I worry him. She thought. Jesse noticed everything, too and gave her a longing look. Then it grew silent, causing Rachel to turn around. The absence of footsteps she heard seemed to echo now. When she turned, her eyes met Noah's. Jesse didn't seemed to notice, fixated on how he was going to apoloigize to Mr. Schue. She shook off his gaze and returned to Mr. Schue.
"Mr. Schuester, Will, you've got to understand I'm sorry. I know that I deserve to die and I certainly don't deserve any forgiveness or kindness, but just know that I am sorry. I know I'm a jackass and I hate myself. All the time that Rachel was hurting, I wanted to die. I know it's pretty impossible for you to have any reason to believe me, but just understand that I am sorry. I'm sorry to everyone." Jesse spoke genuinely and had teared up, only letting a few leak from his tired, lonely eyes.
"Jesse- I...I didn't understand..." the young teacher started, not angry anymore.
"No I guess you didn't. I mean, damn, I made her feel like I did. Fuck, why was I so stupid?" he raged.
"Wait, Jesse. You said you made me feel...like you did?" Rachel asked, her voice small. He stared into her innocent, pleading eyes. He slowly reached for his sleeve and tugged it up a bit. Scars.
"Jesse..." they both said horrified and ashamed. Rachel threw her arms around Jesse and held him tightly. She cried behind his back and he did too, although he tried not to.
"Look, Mr. Schuester, I know that I don't deserve to be forgiven yet, but - " Jesse was stopped as Mr. Schue also took the young man in a strong hug. Jesse was grateful.
"I'm sorry, Jesse." he mumbled, squeezing the boy a bit tighter. Rachel turned to see Noah turning around, heading back towards the building.
"Wait, Noah!" she called. He ignored her. She ran towards him until she was at his back and she tugged on his arm.
"What the hell do you want?" his eyes were angry and dark - something she'd never seen before. She was taken back by his powerful stance.
"I-I..." she stuttered. He stared into her eyes, and for a second, they softened as he pressed her lips against his. His lips crushed hers as he held her head in place, brushing his cold fingers across her cheek. He pulled back and stared at her shocked expression. Without another word, Noah turned around and headed back to the building, leaving Rachel to face Jesse and Mr. Schue alone, as well as the entire Glee club.
