Disclaimer: I do not own Phineas and Ferb.
If I did, there'd be a lot more shipping.
CHAPTER NINE:
Cognizance
FERB
This had to be one of the most bizarre mornings of my adolescence. I appreciated the humor and irony; what made this morning so odd was the complete lack of odd things. There were no lasers, no sounds of hammers or sawing, no towering mechanisms. There was nothing out of the ordinary, if one lived in any other house. But for us, it was almost… disturbing.
It was ten in the morning, and Phineas had just woken up. He'd snoozed a few times at seven, then turned his alarm clock off altogether—something I'd never seen him do. Then he acted surprised, like he hadn't even realized how late it was.
We were now sitting at the table—eating lunch, since Phineas had missed breakfast. For the most part, he was acting normal, but at the same time… not so much.
"Phineas, are you feeling alright, honey?" Mum asked, doing the dishes from the grilled cheeses she'd made us. "It's not like you to get up so late."
"I'm fine, Mom," Phineas said simply before wolfing down his sandwich. Mum still didn't seem pleased with that, though, because she came over and put her head on his forehead.
"Honestly, sweetheart, if you don't feel well it's okay. Your face is a little red, though your forehead isn't too hot. Are you sure—"
"Mom, let him be," Candace said, entering the kitchen and making her way to the fridge. "Phineas is a big boy, and if he says he feels fine, he's fine." She poured herself a cup of milk and rested against the counter, holding it in one hand and looking down at her phone in the other.
Oooookay… since when did Candace come to Phineas' rescue when Mum got protective?
"Besides," my sister continued, giving Phineas a significant look, "isn't a seventeen year old boy allowed one day to sleep in without getting grilled like his sandwich? Leave him be." She downed the rest of her milk and started towards the door. "I'm going to the store. Text me if you think of anything else we need."
Oh yes, something was going on. Candace's behavior, the pinkish tint to Phineas' cheeks… my brother had some explaining to do. Phineas took the opening, though, and pulled me to the backyard, giving a shout of thanks to our mum on the way.
Once we were in our backyard, I raised my eyebrow at him; spill.
"Work while we talk," Phineas laughed, heading toward the garage to get some tools. "We've got some time to make up for."
Then, as Phineas and I worked on wiring for his Thought Machine, he told me how he'd gone over to Isabella's house in the middle of the night.
"I know you thought I should give her a little space," he said almost guiltily, "but I just wanted to make sure she was fine."
I motioned for him to go on, and he laughed.
"You know, I never actually got an answer about what was bothering her, but I do think I cheered her up."
I nodded my head toward the kitchen as if to say, and in there?
"Yeah, I know it was odd," Phineas said. "Candace caught me last night when I was sneaking back inside, but after she heard I was at Isabella's, she 'let me off the hook.' Pretty weird, right?"
I nodded, focusing back on the wiring in my hands.
Through the years, I'd been asked from many sources—Buford, Baljeet, Candace, Mum, and any number of Fireside Girls—if I, in my infinite silence and observation, thought if Phineas had feelings for Isabella.
Every time I was asked, I responded with the same thing; Phineas cares about Isabella a lot, but doesn't put any romantic stress on it, because he likes focusing on projects that make others happy. It isn't that he doesn't like her, he simply lacks any cognizance of females. Some day, he could very well wake up and find that he likes her, but girls or dating aren't even on his mental radar right now.
That's what I told others, but Phineas' acknowledgement of other couples on the community service day, like Ginger and Baljeet, or Katie and Django, skewed the validity of my assumption. My brother was aware of females, romantic feelings, dating, all that lot. He just wasn't aware of any of it when it came to himself.
I loved my brother, but there have been times when I've chaffed against being his sidekick. Phineas was the outspoken, confident poster boy that everybody loved. People addressed him, rather than both of us. Girls fawned over him, though he was blind to it all and no one dared cross Isabella. It was something that I'd learned to accept and reconcile with; I was happy and had what I needed. But it made me reconsider how I viewed Phineas.
Underneath his glowing layers of confidence, maybe there was some doubt there. Perhaps, on a subconscious level, he was insecure about girls, and believed he wasn't worth noticing in a romantic way. Thus, he never saw himself getting noticed that way by Isabella. In an odd way, it made sense.
My brother, the great Phineas Flynn, may actually be insecure about something.
Of course, now would be the absolute worst time for him to start seeing things differently. I'd just realized I had feelings for Isabella, feelings that maybe even went back for years. Unlike my brother, I acted on them. And where as I don't know where Isabella will go with it, I figured I at least I had a chance. A chance that would dissolve immediately if Phineas developed feelings for her.
It was horrible, but for once I was rooting for Phineas' knack of being oblivious.
ISABELLA
I just shouldn't go, I argued with myself for the dozenth time, stepping out of the shower. The whole thing was crazy complicated. But if you don't go, Phineas will know for sure something is up. And what kind of message would that send to Ferb?
I sighed and slumped down on the edge of my bed, still wrapped up in my towel. This would be so much easier if I just knew what I wanted. I'd always wanted Phineas, but after what happened yesterday, everything was wonky. It was like the nice, orderly file drawer in my brain entitled Things Isabella Knows and Feels got bucked by a horse, scattering its contents around my mind in a flurry.
Could I just move on from Phineas? After so many years? I didn't know if I could, even if I did like Ferb. But did I have feelings for Ferb? I could have just been upset over Phineas, and looking for any form of comfort. That was something people did, right?
Yeah, that would make sense, I told myself. That would be a perfect explanation for why I'd kissed him back, right? That could explain everything! But… not why I liked it so much. I mean, it was more than just a simple kiss. I was on his lap, for Pete's sake! Pulling on him, and running my hand through his hair, and doing things I never thought I would.
And what he said was so sweet. But then Phineas was sweet too, showing up last night to make sure I was fine… Ugh, boys sucked.
With a groan, I fell back on my bed, my arms flopping to my side, where I stayed for a solid chunk of time.
"Isa?" my mom called, peeking her head into my room. "Buenos dias, mija. You're getting a late start today. Why aren't you dressed?"
"You know what, Mom, screw it!" I jumped up off my bed, making my way to my closet and tossing on the first thing my hands touched—a pink sundress. I grabbed my hairbrush and started yanking it through my hair. "You always told me when things didn't feel okay, that I had the power to make it okay. So I'm going to go over to my best friends' house, and I'm going to enjoy myself."
"O…kay?" my mom said, raising her eyebrow at my odd behavior.
"And any stupid complications can be damned!" I exclaimed, slipping on my shoes. I hardly ever cussed, but I was fed up with always being frustrated by boys. I grabbed the hoodie from my bed and turned to go out the door, but my mom blocked my way.
"Isa, is there something bothering you? Is something going on between you and Phineas? Habla me."
"Boys are trouble, Mom, but I'm handling it." I kissed her on the cheek, and made my way out the door.
R/R please!
And if you guys see any grammar mistakes or issues, please point them out. This is my first fan fiction, and I don't have a beta reader or anything like that. I try to hawk out as many issues as I can, and I'm pretty good at it, but when it's your own story, things can just sweep under your editing eye. Thanks.
