Hello everyone,

next weekend, next chapter.

To Ryuakilover: No, this story is going to be strictly in Allen's POV.

Also to those who are always waiting for Lavi to appear: I am sorry, but it's still going to be quite some time until he comes. He doesn't have a big role in this story. It's nearly completely focused on Allen and Kanda.

Nonetheless thank you for the reviews.

Disclaimer: This site is called fanfiction not authorfiction.


One month passes without greater incidents. I notice Kanda is getting more and more tense the more time passes though. I also hear him leave in the middle of the night pretty often.

It slightly scares me because I have no idea where he goes this late. First I thought he would go to drink somewhere but I waited for him to come home one time (around half past four in the morning) and he wasn't drunk or anything like that. Maybe he is seeing someone, but I ruled that possibility out as well. It just doesn't fit him and his behaviour.

To add to my uneasiness though I spot bruises on his pale skin now and then. I asked him where he got them but he just scoffed that it wasn't my business.

I couldn't find anything more out about his change either, no matter how hard I try. The same goes for getting a connection to Lavi which caused Kanda to even throw a rage fit. Apart from that he is treating me well. Making me the tea and occasionally food, buying me what I need and helping me when I get sick (happened another five times, yuck). He tried to get me to see a doctor twice but I refused because I hate hospitals beyond anything, so he gave up.

My pregnancy is progressing fine as far as I can tell. The bump is growing, even though I am the only one who sees it. Regarding I am now over four months along, I can feel my baby move these days. The first time I felt a kick I was so happy I ran to Kanda who was in the living room, working. I ignored his bad mood at the time and ran straight up to him and grabbed his hand, laying it on my abdomen. At first he growled at me and was angry, but he stilled when he felt the movement under his palm. I smiled brightly up at him and in that moment for the first time I saw the smallest hint of a smile on his face. Just a little movement of the corner of his lips and a small glow in his eyes.

Right now I am laying in my bed at about five o'clock in the morning, unable to sleep because I can't shake off an uneasy feeling I have and my child won't keep still. So I am moving and trying to find a comfortable position. Kanda is away on his strange night activities, I heard him leaving at around ten o'clock and he still hasn't returned.

Suddenly I hear a loud crash which has me bolting up in the bed. It sounds like something smashed against the front door. But I am too tired to immediately drag myself out of the bed. And soon I hear the clicking of keys and the door slamming open. Apparently Kanda returned. Nothing to worry then. But I can't stop myself from getting a bad feeling when I hear the unsteady steps along the hallway. From what I can tell he is breathing hard and there is a strange noise which sounds nearly like something dripping to the floor.

I hear his bedroom door opening and harshly closing. After a short time he apparently stumbles into the bathroom, crashing against something in the process. Worry has me sitting up straight by now. What happened to Kanda to make him behave like that? Then I hear the shower starting and relax slightly. It can't be that bad right?

I am though proven wrong when I hear a thump from the small room. I tense up and wait for cursing or something like that. But nothing comes and that worries me. I wait some moments then decide that risking Kanda's wrath is worth it now, only to see if he's alright. So I carefully put my feet on the cold floor and stand up slowly.

Trying to make as little noise as possible I walk through corridor, stopping in front of Kanda's door. I take a deep breath and knock.

"Kanda? Are you there? Are you okay?" I ask tentatively, but the answer is only silence apart from the running shower.

My uneasy feeling climbs up a few notches so I carefully open the dark door. And my worry finally peeks when I enter. The room is dark and unlit but immediately I am able to distinct the coppery scent of blood. Fresh blood! What happened? Is Kanda injured? Suddenly my toe lands in something wet. Nervously I lean down and take some of it on my finger, smelling it. It is blood. There are drops of blood on the floor. Was that the dripping noise I heard earlier?

"Kanda? Where are you?" I call out worried but I still don't get an answer.

Putting a hand on my stomach I hurry to the bathroom. I pull it open, automatically blushing at the thought of seeing a naked Kanda. But my fright that something happened to him overrides that and I move inside. At first I don't spot him until I turn to the shower. Behind the class I see a slumped figure. My chest tightens at his posture. I knock on the glass.

"Kanda? Kanda, can you hear me? Are you okay?" I ask, my voice starting to get frantic.

I am close to panic when all I hear is a groan and something, I guess his hand, hitting the glass weakly. I take a breath and pull the shower door open. The shocking sight I see even distracts me from the fact that the raven is laying there stark naked.

He is sitting slumped down against the back wall of the shower. His legs are halfway brought up against his chest due to the cramped space. His head hangs slightly to the side, the long black locks soaked with water and falling to the floor. His eyes are only half open, trying to focus on me. His whole body is black and blue with the occasional small wound here or there. On his forehead is a big gash which is making blood run down over his right eye. Another gash is going across his right ribcage. He is thinner than I thought, his ribs are showing. But what shocks me the most is the left side of his chest. There is a black tattoo of a sign I don't know. Around it are lines, one forming a nearly full circle around it, the others spreading lightning-like from the first one over his collarbone, shoulder, side and ribcage. One nearly reaches his neck. It looks like… scars. I also spot one or two similar lines on his exposed left wrist.

"M-Mo-yashi…?" I suddenly hear him groan, ripping me out of my observing.

Hurriedly I kneel down next to him, touching him carefully, "What the hell happened to you? Why are you injured? Can you hear me?"

"Can, moyashi," he groans, "Why… you here? Why… am I down?"

"I think you blacked out in the shower. Your head wounds looks pretty bad. Can you get up?" I try to conquer my panic and ignore the strange pattern on his chest.

He puts a shaking hand on the side wall and tries to push himself up, but his arm gives away and he slumps back down. I frown at it then lean forward and carefully put a hand under his shoulder, supporting him. He doesn't even protest and leans on me. That alone shows me how bad he is at the moment. He groans deeply and pained when I lift him on his feet. This time I can't stop myself from blushing heavily because (obviously) he doesn't have anything on. So while walking out of the bathroom I grab a small towel with me. Kanda doesn't speak at all, just keeps his head low and his eyes are falling closed now and then. He lets me lay him on his bed and the towel over him.

After I turned the lights on, I take a closer look at him (not his body; I have time for that some other moment). There is a constantly bleeding wound on his forehead to his right temple, pouring blood over his eye. Another small flow of blood is coming from the slash across his ribs. Most of the bruises centre on his chest, abdomen, back and upper arms. It looks bad, I just hope there are no internal injuries. There is a lump on his right collarbone, like it is cracked or formerly broken. From his behaviour I would say he has a concussion too. Carefully I try to get his attention.

"Kanda, can you hear me? Can you talk?"

"Moyashi," he groans, "Drawer left… Second down… Salve, medicine…" He is not even able to form complete sentences anymore.

"The drawer here? It's locked…" I say when I rattle at the knob.

"Keys in jacket…"

I nod and walk over to the black piece of clothing which is thrown over the chair in front of the desk. I pick it up and search through the pockets until I find the keys. Unfortunately there are quite some of them. Not wanting to bother Kanda I just try the ones which look like they could fit. Luckily the second one opens it. Pulling it out, I stiffen slightly at the medicine I see inside. Not only salves like he said but also painkiller, sleep medicine and a lot of herbs.

"Kanda? These are quite some hard painkillers…" I ask nervously.

He only makes a dismissive move with his hand, "Not your problem. Get the damned salve."

I return to him, my worry coming back full force, "You look quite bad. I should call an ambulance."

But before I can move away a hand grips my wrist with surprising speed and strength, "No, you don't. No ambulance… Reason…"

"What reason?" I ask, but his eyes have fallen closed. Has he lost consciousness?

"Okay, I won't do it. You didn't bring me to the hospital either when I asked you not to. But you will have to explain later."

I hear a grunt from him and take it as confirmation. So I set on dressing his injuries. He has fallen deeply asleep by now, maybe unconscious, so at least he keeps still. I put salve on his bruises and bandage the cuts he has. For some reason I don't feel any panic at all, just focus on what I'm doing.

The final panic then kicks in when I am finished and have drawn the cover over him. My body starts shaking and I fall down next to the bed. I was so shocked when I found him like that. I work on regaining my breathing and steady myself. I know this is not good for my child so I really concentrate on calming down. When I am able to stand up, I walk over to him, carefully stretching my hand to touch the lines looking like scars on his shoulder. What is this? If these are really scars, how did they get there? They don't look like they came from an accident. More like… someone carved them there. But why would anybody do that? Kanda has a lot to explain when he wakes up.


That's it for today. Thanks for reading.

So what happened to Kanda this time? Next chapters Allen is finally getting an explanation.

See you then and please review.