hey so below this chapter im putting up story ideas i'll post when I'm done w/ Home. And check out my other story about Rome. HEY! tht rhymes!

A/N: this chapter is based off my favorite song in the whole world =) by THE SCRIPT! =D U have to understand the song to get why I put this song for it.

Enjoy!


"She's all laid up in bed with a broken heart
While i'm drinking jack all alone in my local bar
And we don't know how we got into this mad situation
Only doing things out of frustration
Trying to make it work but man these times are hard"

For the First Time- The Script


Nessie was on my mind the entire night. I don't what the dream meant; we were just looking at each other. Like I was in complete fascination of how gently the skin of her fingers felt when they were on the sides of my face. We kissed in the dream; I was on top of her with both our eyes closed and our lips connected.

It was the best freaking dream I had in a while. I wanted her so badly, but I had to go slow for her sake. Wasn't there anything I could do? God, why was this so hard? If Ness loved – well at least I hope did – me back, then why was it hard? We almost kissed twice yesterday! Then, she stopped it both times. Did that mean . . . ?

I shook my head. I was sitting down at the big marble table in our kitchen during breakfast, pancakes with bacon and toast. I was a little sad today. I didn't know why but Nessie had something to do with it. I just picked at the food with the fork and I heard Rachel.

"Jacob 'The Bottomless Pit' Black isn't eating breakfast? Have I entered an alternate universe?" Rachel teased. And naturally, Rebecca should join in any second now.

"He didn't eat breakfast?" she asked. Becks came over to feel my forehead. "Do you have a fever?"

"Ha Ha. I'm laughing so hard." I said in an extremely dry voice. I can't say I didn't laugh myself. Rachel and Becks always teased me, I remembered Becks saying that we wouldn't be family without it.

Paul walked in eating an apple. "Hey." He went over to kiss Rachel's cheek. Gross. Paul looked back at me. "If you're not gonna eat that I don't know who you are."

We all laughed again. I put one of the pancake pieces in my mouth to shut them up.

"Now that's more like it," Paul sighed.

"So, what's with this girl Dad told me about?" Rebecca asked sitting next to me. "Is she pretty?"

"What girl?" Paul asked. "There's a girl?"

"Yes, and I don't want to talk about it. Where's Ian?" I tried to change the subject. Ian was Rebecca's husband from Hawaii.

"Oh, he's still asleep. Jetlag and stuff you know? He's lived in Maui his entire life. Don't change the subject, who is she?" Rebecca pressed.

"Nessie, are you happy now? And besides, she's just a friend." For now anyway. "I gotta go or I'm gonna be late."

I grabbed my backpack and headed out the door to my Rabbit Volkswagon and drove to school. The city was the same, always was, always will be. I got to the school parking lot and found the only available space in the back. I grabbed my backpack from the passenger seat and put it on my shoulder, opening the door and minding my leg. Finally, I shut the door and tried to get to Quil's car across from mine. . . that was until Jessica Stanley decided to cut in - ex-girlfriends are a killer.

"Jake! Oh my gosh! I saw you on the news! You're so brave." Jessica talked too much and too loud, to top it all off, she had a really squeaky voice. I winced on the inside. I used to think she was sexy, now she's below average compared to Nessie. What did I ever see in her? Thinking about Jessica and I, I wanted to puke so badly.

"Thanks -" Of course, Jessica cut me off.

"Well, everybody thinks you're a hero," Jessica smiled and put her hand on my biceps and gave it a squeeze with her finger nails that dug into my skin, I swear, blood came out. "Including me." She blinked her eyelashes fast, was there something in her eyes?

"Yeah, well, I'm sure anybody would have done it -" Really? Then again, what else do you expect from Jessica 'Jabber- Jaw' Stanley - a nice nickname Jared picked out for her after they dated.

"I wouldn't. You're so brave."

"Um, look as much as I hate to cut this short," Come, on Jake. Think of something. Save yourself! "I have a girlfriend."

Dammit! Why would you tell her that asshole?

"Really?" Jessica looked pissed but tried to cover up her clenched teeth with a smile. She dug her fingers deeper in my skin. "Do I know her?"

"No, actually, she doesn't go to our school."

"Why? Is she home-schooled or something?"

"Yeah, she is."

"What's her name? Come on Jakey, tell me." Jeeze, pushy. Oh look, another reason not to date the school blab/ skank.

Shit! "Um, the thing is, we're kind of um-" I stopped when Quil interrupted. Thank you god!

"Hey you guys," Quil smiled, he put his arms around both of us. He pointed at me and looked at Jessica. "I really need to borrow him for a sec, so, see ya."

He pulled me away and to his car with the rest of the guys. Jared laughed of course. "Sorry man, I would've gotten you if my ears didn't bleed around her."

They laughed and I smiled sarcastically and nodded my head. "Yeah well, you're an ass." They laughed again.

Seth shrugged. "We all knew that." Ha! "So, how is she?"

I knew he meant Nessie. "She's great."

Embry lifted and eyebrow and smirked. "Great. That's it? Just great. She didn't make out with you to thank you for your heroic act?"

"We almost did."

"Almost? What the hell does that mean Jake?" Jared asked.

"Never mind." The bell rang. "Let's just go." I walked into the building and started another day without Ness.


"So class, let's give a round of applause for Mr. Black for his bravery and for breaking his leg." Haha, you're so funny Mr. Kensington; my first hour History teacher. Everybody chuckled and applauded. I felt myself smile.

"Now let's get back to our History paper!"

"Ugh!" everybody groaned, including me.

The next three hours of English, French and Shop class were pretty normal. I knew I could avoid Jessica for long; she sat at my lunch table. I got excused two mintues early from Shop with Embry and went to my locker. I put everything back grabbed my wallet out of my bag. Embry being Embry hassled me.

"So. . . ?"

"Embry, we didn't do anything."

"I know that I just wanted to know what you like about her." I froze and my eyes grew wide. What did I really know about her? She likes chocolate, her favorite color is green, her dad's dead, and she's living in a kettle.

"Um, she- she," I looked at Embry. He had his arms crossed and eyebrows raised like he was expecting me to go on. "She likes chocolate." And the winner of Idiot of th Year goes to Mr. Jacob Black! Nice.

"That's it?" Em's eyebrows furrowed. I slammed the locker shut.

"Well, she doesn't like to talk. What do you want me to say? She enjoys near death experiences? She's a stripper by night?" Oh god. I tried not to picture that.

"No. I just thought that you'd know more. That's all. . . is she really a str-"

"No Em!"

The bell rang saving me from getting a little to picturistic.


Why God? Why can't just eat my sandwhich in peace?

"Jake," Jessica whined. "Just tell me who she is. Please. I won't tell. Promise." I tried not to die of laughter when those words came out of her mouth. The day 'Jabber Jaw' kept a secret would be the day Jesus comits murder. Ha!

"Look it's private. Okay?"

Jessica glared at me. "Fine."

Thankfully the conversation was between the two of us and the rest of the table - Quil, Embry, Jared, Mike, Lauren, Angela and Eric- didn't hear us. Jessica and Lauren were both girls I had once dated and regretted it. I was the school player since sophomore year. I didn't really care if anybody got hurt. Dad was upset for a awhile after he'd found out I'd been with girls at parties or cars or some other alternative. I felt bad now, thinking of Ness. If we were together someday, would she think of me badly?

"So Jake," Lauren moved in on me "How long are you gonna keep that cast on?" She was right next to me. I was cornered between the top two school skanks.

"Another three weeks. Why?"

"I was wondering if you were coming to Mike's party next week? It'll be fun." Lauren put her hand on my shoulder and one on my knee. Why can't they be good girls like Angela Weber? Or Nessie?

"Um, sorry can't." I don't feel like getting an STD. "Doc said I need rest so," I shrugged, "what can you do?" I tried my best not to smile at their disappointed faces.


The rest of the day went pretty normally and I was back at home on the long black leather couch with my math textbook perched on the armrest. Dad wasn't home, he was probably with some of his clients. He was supposed to see Nessie at six today. I sighed. It was 4:56, why didn't time move faster?

An hour past and I climbed into Dad's car.

"Jacob?"

I looked at him. "Yeah?"

"Look, son, take it easy on the girl. She's had a rough life and I heard what you said to her yesterday; the walls aren't that thick. And if she says no, then respect that.'

"Alright Dad," I mumbled.

"You were right, she is depressed." Dad had a sad look on his face. "Her mom said she rarely ever gets out of that house. We don't know why but Nessie might be acting this way because of her dad's death. She was there you know." Billy grimaced a little.

"She was?" My eyes grew wide.

"Yeah, apperantly it was a form of a failed ransom or kidnapping. They caught the guy though, thank god."

This was all news to me. "Who was it?"

He sighed, "A guy who had parents going under treatment and they died. Carlisle was the one treating them but the people had already lost too much blood. He still blamed him though. Actually, Nessie wan't born when that happened, but she was at court the day after they caught him."

"How do you know this old man?"

"Nessie told me, Esme had to fill in a few blank spots though because Nessie was almost breaking own. It's not exactly depression but more like a disorder I suppose. PTSD for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. You've never heard of it."

"How can you tell?" I ignore the last part.

"Well, son, it's all about how the paitent- in this case Nessie- would react to the question. Like remember when you asked her about what she wanted to be and she said 'nothing'. Well, that's one sign right there. Another was when she just looks up at the ceiling, that was a loss of interest. Staying away from the rest of the world and staying in the house for the past few years, agitation, the sleepiness. Sometimes she's paler than she already is. I could keep going on and on."

He was right. Going back over it, I realized Ness really didn't show that much emotion. Or when she was tirecd those few times, when she got mad at my questions, when she refused to go out. That was it. I couldn't believe I never recognised it before. Well, I really didn't even know what was really wrog with her then.

Billy went on, "She feels guilty that she survived and that Carlisle didn't. She loved him alot. So did Esme, she was depressed for a while, she told me. But Esme wasn't there to witness the whole thing."

Was that why Nessie wanted to commit suicide?

"Yeah, it was." I didn't realize I said it outloud.

Finally, we showed up at Nessie's house. Dad and I got out and knocked on the door. Esme opened it with a smile.

"Hello."

"Good afternoon." Dad said.

"Thank you." He got in. "Hello Jacob."

"Hi Mrs. Platt." I stepped inside while I ducked my head slightly under the door frame. I went straight to Nessie's room and opened the door. Hopefully they would mind.

The door creaked open and I found Nessie curled up facing opposite to me. She had a big black turtle neck on which made her look smaller.

"Ness?" I whispered. Her neck craned around to see me. Then she turned her body slowly to fully face me.

"Hi," she whispered.

"Hey." I whispered back. "I'm really sorry about what I said yesterday." I walked over to the corner where the plastic chair was, I grabbed the back of it and brought it over to Nessie.

"It's okay."

"Are you doing okay?"

Nessie hesitated. She looked down and looked back at me. "Fine." Lair.

"Jacob," Nessie's mom poked her head in. "is it okay if you just wait in the living room for a little while? Your father wants a private session."

I got up from the chair so Dad could sit down and ask questions. I followed Esme down the hallway as the door to Nessie's room creaked shut.

"Would you like some coffee?" Esme asked.

"Um, yeah sure."

I sat down and Esme went to the kitchen to grab some mugs and poured the coffee in it. She handed me an orange mug and sat down with the tray of creamer and sugar in the middle of the table.

"So, um, you're quite," she paused looking for the right words, "uh, fond of my daughter?"

My eyes grew wide slightly when I sipped the coffee with my head down.

"It's okay Jacob. I understand."

Oh god. This was awkward.

"Just be careful. I'm warning you, I'm not as innocent as I might look," She smile and sipped her drink.

"Oh, are you an 8th degree black belt?" Esme shook her head. "A secret agent for the government?" Nope. "Then what are you?"

Esme looked at me. "I'm a mother Jacob. I understand you haven't had one in a while. It's alright, I feel the same way about Carlisle."

I stopped to think about what she said. She was right, I remembered when Mom used to look out for me, Rachel and Rebecca. I guess that's why I liked Esme; she reminded me of her.

We heard the door open and close, and in the small space of time, it sounded like Nessie was crying.


READ PLEASE!

okay, srry cliff hanger, next chapter will explain it all. anyways, here the story summary thingies.


ETERNAL(revised) - Jacob lived in Forks, WA where nothing exciting ever happens. But when Nessie come to town holding a secret that will change his world forever. . . will things ever be the for Jacob again? It's world where only the strongest, the fastest and the most adaptable to change. . . wins. After all, survival is the best revenge.

SECRETS- Carlisle is a doctor and Esme is his pregnant wife. When Esme delivers the boy the name Edward, but what's happened to Renesmee? Her eyes are two different colors due to a fatal blow from a kick in the head by Edward. The nurse, Rosalie is forced to take the baby from Carlisle when he decides to put his child in an institution from retarded individuals. How will Renesmee learn that her father gave her up at birth?


THAT'S ALL FOR NOW UNTIL I GET MORE IDEAS, I'D REALLY APPRECIATE YOUR INPUTS ON THESE STORIES!