Oh, my lovely, lovely readers: I fear the end is near. THIS IS IT. After this, I'll write an epilogue, and this story shall be done.
BUT NEVER FEAR! I'm not done with the states yet. (Gotta torture Ginny some more!) If you guys want me to, I'll start a collection of oneshots, starring the states. It would include the oneshot of Montana, NY, and Maryland getting drunk, among other things. My question is: should I?
And if you look up BelarusAndRomanoFan on DeviantArt, you'll see her very cute drawing of NC! And Fruitstogether wants to draw England's costume, and state chibis! Yay!
Now on to hetalia, which isn't mine!
O-O-O-O
America frowned and paused in mid-sentence. "What's that noise...?"
"Amerique, if you have rats..." France started to draw his feet up onto his chair.
"No way, dude. We don't have rats. With all Virginia's cats everywhere, they wouldn't last a minute. Plus, New York is terrified of them. If they were here, we'd know."
The door banged open. "We didn't see England anywhere, Dad," Wyoming said, just loud enough to block the muffled thumps coming from the closet. He looked up innocently.
"Yeah! Nowhere to be seen," Idaho agreed a bit too quickly. "Anyways... You want some potatoes?" She held up a bowl of mashed potatoes, changing the subject.
Prussia, Germany, and Ireland all looked like they were going to say yes, but they were interrupted by yet another state.
"Lobster is obviously far superior to your potatoes, idiot." What appeared to be a mini Massachusetts rolled his eyes.
Germany sighed. "America? If you don't mind...?"
"Okay... Um, this is Idaho, Mariana Jones, and Wyoming, William Jones. And that's Maine. He's very... uh... "
"Temperamental," Idaho supplied.
"I am not!"
"Oh yeah you are, man." Wyoming gave him a look. "You threw a fit because you couldn't find the newspaper this morning.. Which you left in the kitchen."
"I thought Vermont took it..." Maine muttered.
"Um, kids? I appreciate the search for England, and the potatoes and stuff, but... We kinda have a meeting to be working on."
"Okay!" Idaho grinned. The phone in her pocket buzzed slightly, the agreed-upon signal. She bit her lip. She had to continue the distraction. "Actually, I was thinking, you should really all take a break. It's such a long meeting, after all!"
"Thanks but no thanks, kiddo. We just ate lunch twenty minutes ago. And besides, we'll probably only be at it for another half hour. Why don't you guys go hang out with everyone else? Wherever they're all hiding..."
The phone buzzed again. Idaho internally sighed with relief, and nodded subtly at her brothers.
"Okay. Nice to meet you all!" Wyoming waved, smiled, and dragged the other two out of the room.
Once they were safely back in Hawaii's room with the others (it was the closest to the meeting room), Maine looked around for Massachusetts. "Is the idiot back yet?"
"If by idiot you mean Mass, no, he's on his way." Virginia walked around a huge heap of Barbie dolls and over to the three states.
Suddenly, Hawaii's closet door burst open, and Massachusetts fell out, covered in black smudges. He landed on his face. "Success!" He cheered, slightly muffled by the carpet. He sat up. "I never thought I'd be glad about all those dirty secret passages. England has been better restrained!"
"Yeah... And you stole my stuff to do it..." New York glared at him.
"Aww, come on Yorkie. You love me and you know it." Massachusetts smirked and flying-tackled the younger state.
"Ugh... Take a shower, you're filthy." New York scooted away.
"You're getting my unicorn dirty!" Hawaii wailed. Massachusetts quickly stepped away from the stuffed unicorn that now had a black smudge on the side and sat back down in the closet.
Virginia sighed. "I can wash it, Leila. Don't worry about it."
"You're such a girl." South Carolina rolled her eyes.
"I don't seem to recall you complaining in the civil war when I was the only person on our whole side who could sew. INCLUDING all you girls..." Virginia glared at her.
"Let's not bring the civil war back..." Delaware gave a slight shudder.
"You border states went all Multiple Personality disorder on us. That was just weird." Conneticuit made a face from her perch on the pink flowered bedspread.
"Yeah, that was creepy. But Ginny, you do act like a girl." Georgia snickered, eating a bite of one of the peaches Arkansas had brought her.
"I do not! And don't call me Ginny!"
Massachusetts stuck his head out of the closet. "Hey, remember that time when D.C. was really little and he legitimately thought Virginia was his mom?"
"We agreed not to talk about that!" Virginia's frying pan flew into the closet.
CLANG!
"Ow..."
"I remember that." Maryland broke his usual silence. He smiled slightly.
Virginia was blushing bright red. "He was a baby, okay?!"
"It was adorable," North Carolina said with a little sigh. She hugged Hawaii's teddy bear.
"Stop talking!" Virginia looked like he wanted to kill someone.
"I think Cal has a video from the 40's of him doing that. You guys wanna watch it?" Michigan looked at California, who nodded.
"NO."
"Yes!" everyone else agreed.
Virginia groaned.
"We have nothing better to do while we wait for the meeting to finish. To the theater!" Massachusetts ran off, California and Michigan on his heels. The others followed.
Maryland grabbed Virginia and pulled him along. He wasn't leaving him there alone.
Virginia silently prayed for an early death.
-0-0-0-0-0-0-
America sighed, glad the meeting was finally over. He didn't know how many more of China's "subtle" hints about his debt he could take before he punched someone.
"Thanks for staying to clean up, guys." He gave a tired grin to Japan, Russia, and the handful of others who had stayed to clean up the disaster that was their meeting room.
Suddenly, they heard the same thumping noise as before.
France jumped up on a chair. "Rat!"
Both Italies climbed onto the table. "Where?!"
"I told you, it's not a rat!" America frowned. "It sounds too big to be a rat..."
The thumping came again. America followed the sound away from the table and towards the supply closet. He frowned again and reached for the handle.
O-O-O-O
In Virginia's room, all thirteen of the colonies were crowded around the security camera, holding their breath. Washington D.C. was sitting on Maryland's lap, holding the laptop.
"Hey guys?" New Jersey looked up.
"What?" Rhode Island tilted her head in question.
"I just realized that we're going to be in really big trouble..." He gulped. Everyone's eyes widened.
"$#%&."
And then the closet opened.
O-O-O-O-O
America stared.
England had been stuffed into the closet, dressed up like Queen Elizabeth I. He was fuming, twisting and struggling to escape. He had a bright red, curly wig on his head, styled into a towering—and frankly impressive—column, draped with pearls and jewels. His face was covered in makeup, from green eyeshadow to bright rogue on his cheeks. Pink and black bacon-printed duct tape* covered his mouth. Matching the green eyeshadow was an enormous green dress, with a ruffled Shakespearean collar and ridiculously puffy sleeves. The skirt had so many petticoats it barely fit into the closet. Tiny black shoes peeked out from under the skirt, and a pair of handcuffs stamped "Property of NYPD" kept his hands secured behind his back.
The other nations stared.
France raised an eyebrow.
Canada stifled a giggle as he took in the sight of his former caretaker. Australia flat-out lost it.
Japan stared a moment longer, then whipped out his notebook, new manga ideas already pouring into his head.
Russia tilted his head like a confused puppy.
The Italies blinked in unison, utterly lost.
America kept staring, gaping like a fish.
Finally, France ripped off the duct tape. "OW! Bloody Frog! That hurt! Now get me out of here and help me kill them!"
America shook his head, bringing himself back to his senses. His eyes slowly darkened as he realized what had happened.
"KIDS!"
O-O-O-O
Massachusetts gulped. "We're dead."
THE END.
NOTES:
-In Idaho, they grow a LOT of potatoes.
-There's a lot of lobster fishing in Maine.
-the border states of the civil war were slave states that stayed in the union: Delaware, Maryland (stay with Ginny or stay with his family? ;) I'm sure that's why he was torn), Missouri, and Kentucky
-*I saw this duct tape at the store the other day. It was the weirdest thing I've ever seen. (So if course the states have some.)
-NYPD: New York Police Department
GUEST REVIEWS:
DaLittleBird: You're welcome! I'm so glad you liked her!
Guest: MUAHAHAHAHA! I like evil laughter! ^.^
STUFF:
Some other things: Czech—I hope you know my boyfriend is permanently scarred from meeting you. Queen Quenn of Nerdingham—Alaska fears you. You're awesome! And Fruitstogether—I wanna see these chibis when they're done! PM me if you need help or descriptions!
See ya all in the epilogue!
