A/N: Thanks to Explodium for the correction! Taiwan is shaped like a tobacco leaf, and they landed in CKS International Airport. As for the airlines, it is called Airwan because even though I thought Eva was a good airline (and thank goodness, they don't wear puce uniforms), I wanted to make Max and the flock a bit more picky. I was afraid people might get mad because I'm putting Eva down, so I gave them a fictional airlines to bad-mouth. Additionally, this chapter used to be on Taipei 101, but I since don't want to make it offensive to Explodium or anyone else by talking about it rudely (or rather, making the flock talk about it rudely), I am forgoing the chapters on Taiwan's sights and scenery. Unfortunately, this means I've just lost about three chapters or so. So, if anyone has any suggestions on content or setting, please tell me!

Disclaimer: Ya know, I've always wondered what would happen if the author of a book decided to write a fanfiction on their own book. Would they feel a sense of insane rule-breaking glee as they wrote the disclaimer, or would they say something like "Mua ha ha ha ha! I wrote this book, and thus all these characters belong to me!"? Something to ponder.

Chapter Nine —

"Eww… what is this?" Gazzy made to poke the mound of odd looking gloop in front of him, and then withdrew his hand quickly as he thought better of it. It was greenish and had a lot of oval-shaped brown seeds poking out of it.

"Eat it. I dare you." Iggy taunted. "What does it look like, Fang?"

"A kiwi on steroids, but without the outer fluff." I raised an eyebrow at Fang, who smirked back at me. "Well, it's true."

I looked at the short Taiwanese woman behind the counter who gave me a huge smile. She pointed at the fruit (at least, I think it's a type of fruit) and then pretended to eat it and rub her tummy. "I think the lady wants us to buy it."

Iggy crossed his arms. "Eat it, Gazzy. I had to eat the cow tongue."

"Yeah, but I ate the chicken feet before that."

"And I ate the stinky tofu, but you wouldn't because I spat it out."

"You practically passed out on the ground! And anyways, the smell alone is more than enough for me."

"Excuse me? The Gasman telling us that something smells bad?"

"I still say you have to eat it. I ate the dragonfruit."

"But that actually tasted good!"

"No it didn't! I didn't like it! It was too slimy."

"Enough guys." I cut in, rolling my eyes. Ever since we had arrived at the night market after dinner, Gazzy and Iggy had been having an ongoing testosterone battle to see who would eat the weirder things. So far, I had already bought them cow tongue, chicken feet, pig intestines, pig ears, stinky tofu, dragonfruit, guava, as well as a sports drink unhappily named Pocari Sweat. Things were getting out of hand.

"Can I get another bubble tea, Max?" Angel asked, pulling at my sleeve.

"Sure, sweetie. How much is it?"

"Twenty-five dollars."

"Get me one too, okay?" I counted out fifty NTD and handed it to her. She nodded and skipped over to a milk tea stand a little ways away. By the way, dear reader, in case you are wondering why stuff costs so much here, let me explain some simple conversions, brought to you courtesy of Ella. It takes about thirty-one NTD, or new Taiwanese dollars, to equal an American dollar. Seeing as one milk tea — which is, by the way, huge and so freaking amazing tasting you would never believe it — is only twenty-five dollars, I don't even need to be some math genius to know that they are so totally worth it. Seriously. If I weren't a mutant freak who needs at least 6,000 calories, then I could probably survive on these things. Well, that and cookies, of course.

But anyways.

"Ooh, look!" Ella gaped as we walked past stand after stand of vendors selling jewelry and other accessories. "It's so pretty!"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, we all love shiny stuff."

"Like, oh my gosh, isn't this just so cute?" Nudge gave a very squeal-ish squeal as she pounced on the sparkly wares of a wide-eyed vendor. He nodded and gestured at the seven of us, smiling and hovering over Nudge as she cooed over one necklace after another. Ella and Angel soon joined her, while Gazzy and Iggy complained that we should go back to the food area. Fang was silent as usual, hanging back in the shadows and eyeing the glittering jewelry warily.

"How does this look on me, Max?" Nudge turned around and struck a pose for me, showing off the small key necklace around her neck. "Or do you think this one is better?" She held up another necklace in with the same design, but in blue. "I totally love this design, don't you? It's just so cute! I remember once I saw one like this back in California or somewhere, but it was like twenty dollars. This one is only one hundred NTD, isn't that so awesome? We should totally—"

"Maaax. I'm boreeed. Why can't we just go back to the food section?" Gazzy eyed the stand with distaste and then look up at me.

"We need to stick together though." I glared at him. "I am not letting you two get away from me this time. I can't believe you did that at dinner! And it was such a nice restaurant too!"

"Aww, come on, Max. As far as they know, all Americans act like this. I think the Taiwanese need to lighten up, anyways."

"You two were having a silverware fight in the middle of the aisle. I'm surprised you didn't climb on top of the table."

"Yeah, did you see the look on Principal Hanley's face? Classic."

"You know," Iggy said thoughtfully, "I bet she was wondering how I could have a swordfight with you even though I'm blind."

Gazzy pulled on Iggy's arm until he was able to reach his neck, and then he looped an arm over Iggy's shoulders. "It's 'cuz we have such great teamwork. Isn't teamwork one of Saint Valentine's mottos?"

I looked at them — with Gazzy grinning insanely and Iggy almost bent double and trying to grin at me — and burst out laughing. It was impossible to stay mad at the two of them for long.

"Max, can we get this?" I turned around to find Angel and Nudge looking at me pitifully. "Pleeease?" They held matching heart necklaces and bracelets.

I sighed. "How much is it?"

"Well, I can't really understand what he's saying, but he keeps on gesturing and stuff. Maybe you could find out. They're supposed to be a hundred each, but…" Angel gave a little frown. "It's so annoying that I can't understand what he's thinking."

I wanted to remind her that most people don't have the skill of knowing what anyone is thinking, but I stopped myself.

The vendor looked at me, and then pointed at the sign in front of his wares that had a big "100" written on it. I didn't need to be able to read Chinese to see that it cost a hundred NTD. However, he kept on bouncing around and pointing at us. When we all looked at him with blank expressions, he pointed at Angel and then at his own head, and then he smiled and made an X with his arms.

"I think he's trying to say that Angel doesn't have a brain." Gazzy announced triumphantly.

Angel glared at him. We all looked back at the man, who was beginning to looking frustrated. He looked around wildly, and then, as if getting an idea, he started digging underneath his stand. I gave a sigh of irritation and fell back next to Fang, scanning the area for any danger.

The man got out a sheet of crumpled looking paper and a pen. Then, he very deliberately pointed at Angel, and then Nudge, before writing on his paper another "100". Glancing up to see that we were watching, he crossed out the "100" and instead wrote "80".

"Coolio! I think this means we get a discount!" Nudge clapped her hands together in excitement. "I don't know why he's doing this though. Maybe he thinks we're cute!" She giggled and ducked around Angel, putting her hands on her small shoulders. "He's too old though. Maybe if he were a bit younger, like, eighteen or something? I wonder if men are more mature at eighteen? I've always heard that men mature more slowly than women, so for a good relationship, the man has to be at least four years older. I wonder if that's true? If it is, then it would totally be cool—"

"Right. Nudge, why don't we pursue this another time?" I dug out a five-hundred dollar bill, and then paused. A thought had just occurred to me, and I glanced over at the silent Fang, who was currently doing his best to blend into the shadows. I paused, and then turned back to the girls. "You know, Nudge, Angel, that's a lot of money you two are trying to spend on jewelry."

Nudge's face fell. "But Ella's bought a green heart necklace and bracelet, and me and Angel are gonna get purple and pink! And anyways, it would be, like, totally unfair to Ella, because she won't have any one to match with! We were planning to get matching outfits today!"

I rolled my eyes. "I think you mean Angel and I. Regardless, I never said that you can't get that stuff. I just think if you two are going to spend so much on it, I should have my own condition you must fulfill."

Angel looked at me with innocent eyes. Then they widened a little. I guess she must have read my mind. What do you say, Angel?

"That'll be kinda hard…" she mused.

"What will?" Gazzy asked, looking between her thoughtful face and my mischievous one. "What are you gonna do?"

"Where's Fang?" I asked, looking around. "Please don't tell me he's…"

"I'm right here." Fang magically appeared out of the shadows, as if he was there the whole time. Which is probably not far from the truth.

"Faaang…?" Angel smiled up at him. "Will you pretty please do something for me? Preeetty please?"

Fang looked from Angel's beaming face, to the confused looks coming from the flock, and finally to me. I was barely suppressing the giggles that were threatening to consume me.

"Oh, crap."