Entry 9.

Russia's condition grew better and that allowed for Ivan to become more stable and an even stronger nation. Even now, he is in such a good position, he could easily pull himself out of his insanity, but he has no intention to.

The majority of his old family is too terrified to even come near him. The Baltics will all begin shaking at just the mention of his name. His elder sister avoids him to try to be self-reliant. She had also seen what had happened to Ivan after everyone left and began to be even a little terrified herself. His younger sister believes that she can bring his emotions back through love and, as such, as become desperate to marry him. The only thing she has accomplished was to bring the emotion of fear back temporarily.

Alfred is now completely terrified of ghosts, just from the mere memory of seeing General Winter once, which made Ivan laugh. He lived the nightmare of General Winter nearly every day of his life. And now he did not have to fear anyone he cared about to get hurt by him because there was no one left to care for.

His heart remains in his chest, falling out on occasion because of its flimsy balance inside of his chest. Ivan grew used to the odd weight after a short while, always thinking of it as a constant reminder that he did not need his emotions and could easily crush their origin if need be.

Everyone is terrified of him now and hardly anyone comes close enough to him to even try to get to know him. Even Gilbert avoids him, especially since he is now too weak to try anything as he is no longer a nation.


This journal was given to me as a way of…self-therapy, let's call it. I do not believe that it has worked, but now would be the time for me to wrap things up for those of you that are reading it.

The spiral downwards into insanity is slow, and hardly obvious. It can happen to anyone if it can happen to someone as strong as a country. It happened to me.

You might be curious as to who I am now.

You can call me whatever the hell you want, I couldn't care less. Ivan, Russia, commie, crazy, creepy…The truth is, I don't give a fuck anymore.

You might think it's better to try to hold onto sanity. In all fairness, that could work for some people. But I'm too far gone to even try. So, what the hell? Might as well take it for a ride.

You all should join me, da?