I can't look at her any longer, Stefan motions for me to meet him in the hallway and I jump at the chance. As soon as were out of ear shot from Elena he turns to me with a grave expression. "Tell me what happened from the very begging" he says slowly. I swallow. "The last time you saw me I was traveling with Mary and Charles, things were good back then. Then Charles got hungry for more and began expanding our group, soon there were eight of us and it changed from a group about exploring the world to a group about hunting and competing for innocent blood. I hated every second of it, but I didn't know how to get away – I had only ever known what Charles had taught me. I knew nothing about what life was like without him there. " I paused and looked at Stefan, he looked curious. He motioned me to keep going. "I came up with this idea that I could escape from Charles's pack. I would pick a human girl and turn her into a vampire, we would spend the rest of our lives together and I would be happy and free." After saying that out loud I began to realize just how sad and weak I sounded. It defiantly sounded better in my head.

"So then you found Harriet?" Stefan questioned a slightly disgusted look on his face. "No, it took me a long time to find Harriet. I followed other girls first, trying to get to know them from a distance and see if they were the one. I would watch them and school and at home looking to see if they were the girl I would spend the rest of eternity with." "You stalked them." Stefan stated this time with definite disgust on his face. "I never thought of it like that, it was just my way of checking them." I mumbled, ashamed of my actions. I kept on going with my story "I ended up finding Harriet and straight away knowing she was the one, unlike some of the other girls the more I followed her the more I got to like her. After some time I decided to introduce myself to her for the first time. I lied that I was a student ballet teacher to get close to her, I had only known her 4 days and she was beginning to like me when the accident happened." I didn't know if I could keep going but Stefan urged me on "She was dancing for me. Showing me her audition piece when her ankles just sort of collapsed and she hit the ground at the wrong angle and skinned her knee. It was a simple injury but there was still blood. I wasn't prepared to be so close to her blood, I had never properly practiced self control before and before I knew it I was no longer me and I was biting her neck." I began to shake, I hadn't really thought back on the accident since it happened earlier tonight. Her blood was still lingering in my system. These memories were hitting me like knives in the back. Regret was tugging at my gut. "Her blood was so sweet and I didn't want to stop, but then I remembered all I had felt for her. it took all my strength to let her go, I didn't think about her head hitting the floor. Then I began to panic and called you, you know the rest." Stefan closed his eyes and pinched the bridge between his forehead, thinking hard.

I was beginning to calm down but nerves still rattled through my body, I listened in for the soft sound of her breathing. "If vampire blood can heal her then why can't I give it to her?" I ask. "Because I can't be sure why she's not waking up or even stirring. Vampire blood heals physical injuries fine but when it's an injury to the brain things can go wrong – the body will try to heal too fast and connections might not fix properly, it could cause her brain damage. With her weight all of his healing will put a lot of strain on her heart, her blood is thin. I don't know what to do." Every one of his words cut through me like a dagger. The pain of loosing her seems too much and she's not even gone yet. I consider dying with her. "We can give her blood and hope that she heals properly or we can leave her and pray that her body does the right thing. It's your choice." Stefan turns to me. It's my choice.