A/N; Hey guys, and this is another early chapter for Jaune Torchwick and I would like to say to Benthino, god damn you, you lovable bastard, because that guy is truly an artist and a nice guy. Anyways I will continue the story from here, so enjoy it guys and girls, and other…things. Yeah ENJOY YOU SUCKEEEERS!
Team JNPR's Dorm
Jaune opened his eyes and looked up at the ceiling that had a picture of Jaune in a pose that showed himself signing an autograph to someone who was tied up and another picture that had the autograph stuffed into the man's mouth. Jaune chuckled and got out of bed with a yawn, scratching his butt while he did so and looking around the room. Everyone was still asleep, and that seemed good. He grabbed his scroll from his desk and stepped outside the room silently before walking through the halls of Beacon. He had put on the standard uniform meant for the place, he was tempted to shred it the minute he received it, and pulled out his scroll.
He pulled up his personal scroll and looked around a bit before shaking his head. Too risky, and there could have been a few of those night stalkers around, and he really didn't want to bury a body so soon and risk everything, and his ass if Cinder found out he screwed up his identity and position in Beacon so fast, just for one kill. He walked off and looked to a window to his right and gave a nod and promptly opened it as quietly as possible and leaped out and fell headfirst into the ground. This resulted in the sound of someone's entire rib cage being broken and their sternum's cracking in half and a twig shoved someone's head.
Jaune twitched and held in the shriek of pain that wanted to let loose and just let everyone in Beacon know that it hurt. A lot.
"…Oh my Monty…Dad you better give me a lot of lien for dealing with half the crap I have to deal with. If I had my swords with me this would be a lot easier and I would have known if this place was so damn high! I thought I went through a god damn tour." Jaune muttered as his ribs began to connect themselves back to his spinal cord and his sternum getting back into space. Jaune raised his eyes and watched the twig pop out thanks to his healing factor.
'TOUR?! As if, I mean we are way too awesome for that shit! Now let's go get some CHIMICHANGAS!' Jaune heard a voice speak in his head and raised his eyes before looking around in case he was insane.
'I'm not insane, right?' Jaune thought with a frown on his face and his scroll in his hands as he removed himself from the bush, brushing off all the dust and twigs that got caught in his uniform.
'You did but you forgot it because you were too stupid to even listen. You spend half the time either talking about lien, Neo, and women. To answer your question though, yes you are insane. You have voices in our head, you cut down people with ease, you've dealt with the White Fang before and you have a semblance that basically makes you immortal. I am pretty sure we have passed the insane meter into super delusional maniac.' The smart voice spoke, and Jaune remembered this voice from before when he was thinking he could fly, and then this asshat burst his bubble.
'Remember I can hear whatever you think, moron?' The smart voice spoke back with irritation clear in his voice. Jaune groaned and decided that enough was enough and just pulled up his scroll and typed in a specific number.
"Is this Vale's Pizza shop? I want to make a late order," Jaune spoke and listened to static for a few moments before Roman's voice caught his attention.
"Really? Pizza shop? I thought I taught you better, it's always tech department, because those suckers at Beacon always care for their electronics, weapons, television, and everything else that basically hums. Anyways anything you wanted to report in?" Roman asked and heard the sound of glass shattering only a few feet behind him.
"Well say hello to Jaune Arc, leader of team JNPR," Jaune said sarcastically and leaned on the wall behind him for support, while pushing through the bushes to cover himself from view, holding his scroll to his ear.
"Oh god we are screwed. You cannot even keep lookout for more than ten seconds before blowing something up. You do realize Cinder is going to roast my ass, right? Literally roast it! Neo what the hell- get off the scroll! He is my god damn kid!" Roman shouted through the scroll with frustration.
"Neo says hi by the way, and…she said…if you don't come back by the end of Saturday, two days from now by the way, she will personally come over there and kick your ass." Roman said and the sound of something breaking got his attention.
"Not the alcohol!" Roman's voice shouted through with panic.
"I'll be at the house on Saturday, okay? Look I got to go now, alright? Also I think I am going to need to go to The Club soon. See ya around, dad. Tootles." Jaune shut off the scroll, and smirked out before looking around.
"Where the heck is the entrance to the dorms again?"
'We are going to show so much swag!' The happy and cheerful voice stated to all in the mind of Jaune.
'Idiot…'
Professor Port's Class
"Jaune Arc? Why are you here so early? It's not even near nine yet," a large man said to Jaune who had a sheepish smile on his face. The man had quite the mustache, Jaune did admire the mustache for it presented the presence of a strong man, and he had grey hair and gray eyebrows along with a red uniform of some kind with lots of buttons, or pins? What were they?
"Well I woke up very early, popped a few squats, five hundred pushups, and worked the abdominals before catching some beef and of course I wanted to come early. Got any questions you want to pop off, lectures, studying, or, or…killing something, huh?" Jaune asked while he sat in his chair, leaning his head back as Port held his chin and was deciding on whether start class with Jaune and give him the lesson quicker than everyone else, or just wait.
'Smart move. Ask for an early lesson, figure it out, and then once you're finished the class comes in and you can be excused since you already went through it. Pretty smart, Jaune.' Smart said with proudness in his voice.
'Pfft, I bet he just cheated! He doesn't have it on him man, so let's talk food. I'm thinkin' of going downtown to Vale's best chimichanga shop and stuff our faces full!' Happy put his voice in and got a groan from both of the people.
"Well, Mister Arc, since you've shown some attention, and you did wake up early, I guess I could tell you of the Grimm, but let's talk about a young handsome man. Me. You see I was…,"
Thirty Minutes of Lecturing Later
"In the end the beowolf was no match for my sheer tenacity. And I returned to my village with the beast in a cage and my head held high. Celebrated, as a true hero," Port finished and bowed to Jaune before raising his finger up as one point.
"The moral of the story, you mask ask? A true huntsman must be honorable, dependable, strategic, well-educated, and wise. This would be the part where I would release an opponent for you to fight, but seeing as the entire class is gone and you are here, what do you think, hm mister Arc?" Port asked and Jaune got up before clapping before Port with amazing respect.
"That was awesome! You took down a beowolf with your bare hands? Dear lord that is awesome, and the way you used an axe later on bring it down to its knees was amazing." Jaune praised and kept clapping at Port who waved his hand in an embarrassed manner.
"Oh stop it. You're embarrassing this old man, but seeing as class will begin how about after the lecture I let you fight the opponent, hm? You sit in the back and catch a quick nap and I will wake you to go get ready. Is that fine with you?"
"Are you kidding me? I want to show off and show that these people are standing in the presence of a true hunter. Anyways I'll go sleep now, alright?" Jaune said and Port gave a nod of confirmation before Jaune's head met the wooden desk that lay below his perfect chin.
'Idiot.'
'I thought it was nice! Like how ice cream people are nice, but then again we do rob them…Nah! They're always happy! Hehehehe.'
Team RWBY
"We're going to be late!" Weiss shouted and immediately started running out of her dorm after just getting over the fact that her team had just made bunk beds. She really didn't want to go through this now, and if it wasn't bad enough her leader was some girl that was younger than her, and she didn't seem smart at all.
"Coming, Weiss!" Ruby said as she caught up with her in a heartbeat as she ran with her team, along with JNPR who came running, but without Jaune.
As team RWBY made it to the class, just barely, they saw everyone finding their seats but they saw Jaune sleeping on his desk in the back with the most peaceful smile ever. Ruby chuckled at the sight of Jaune sleeping and so did Yang. As class went on Port finally finished his story.
"I would of course ask one of you to step up and prove yourselves worthy," Port said and Weiss immediately raised her hand so that she could show what she was capable of. "But sadly that privilege goes to Mr. Arc. Mr. Arc if you would please wake up and retrieve your gear, then it would be most beneficial to us all."
Jaune suddenly woke up and let out a yawn and looked around, watching an entire class of eyes stare at him. "Well not exactly how I want to wake up to a beautiful day, but then again nothing here is beautiful besides the ladies and the food." Jaune stated boldly and quite loudly before walking off to get his coat and weapons.
After retrieving his weapons Jaune stepped up and looked around with a tired expression and pulled out his swords before slicing them together, causing a burst of sparks to burst through. Professor Port released the Boaratusk that shook in the cage as it walked out and snorted at its opponent. It whined in anger and looked to Jaune who looked back who looked to Ruby who looked to Weiss who looked to Yang who looked to Blake who kept studying Jaune with her eyes.
"Okay just type me killing the damn thing, author!" Jaune yelled out and watched the class look at Jaune in confusion before the beast charged at Jaune who stood still before crossing his swords and blocking the strike. Jaune smirked before the beast reared its head back to hopefully knock the human down along with his weapons but saw Jaune use his swords as they crossed against the Boar's tusks and crossed together and flipped himself over onto the beast's back. He yelled loudly as the boar kept shaking, hoping to get the human off its back.
"RIDE TO VICTORY! CHAAAAARGE!" Jaune roared out and rode the beast around the center of the class where Port laughed. Only a true hunter with courage would ride a Grimm to battle, especially for a joyride.
Jaune smirked before he flipped off and slapped his hands and took a matador pose before he crunched his knuckles as a red light seemed to go off. Under Jaune's coat his entire right arm was bulging with muscle, but the thing was he was using aura to power himself up. The fact is was that he was using aura beyond its limits. Aura could be used as a shield, and as a weapon, but he used it for more. He pushed the human boundaries that would have killed anybody, but since Jaune had healing…he basically healed fast enough before his body could blow up, crunch his bones, and kill him.
Jaune raised his fist as the Boaratusk began a spin and charged straight at Jaune who tipped his hat and sent his right fist flying which took effect quickly, his arm immediately breaking in the process which immediately healed, sending the Grimm directly into the floor, its entire half squished inside its own body.
Jaune's coat covered the fact that his arm was bended up so much that it was a pretzel that never made it through a pretzel shop. Jaune watched everyone look at him with surprise before he bowed down.
"Thank you, thank you. I love you all, and I got to scoot! See ya teach," Jaune said and snapped his fingers before leaving.
"Is it wrong that I found that kind of sexy?" Yang asked as she looked around the class and watched everyone just stay silent.
"Yeah!" The kid in a black shirt shouted out.
"You shut up!" Professor Port said with annoyance in his voice.
A/N; YAYS FOR THIS PEOPLE! Anyways I know it seems weird that Jaune can do that, but I think Aura has its limits. I think Jaune can push beyond those limits and attack, but at the effort of either a limb blowing up or a spinal cord breaking, but he heals faster than it can hurt. Anyways here's a short omake.
Jaune Arc, the Rodeo Clown
Jaune rode the boar grimm around the room and was swishing his hat in circles like an old fashioned cowboy. He was flung off in a minute though and had his butt in the air, and then the grimm saw a target to piece. The Boaratusk reared its head and snorted before going into a charge with Jaune flying out the class and running away from the little critter that chased him.
"CATCH ME IF YOU CAN!" Jaune smacked his butt in emphasis, further taunting the beast and flaring its anger. It snorted and prepared the tusks of doom for this human's defiance and taunting.
Headmaster's Office
"Well it is as it has always been. Peaceful," Ozpin said as he sipped from his mug and looked outside at the grass of Beacon and from below. He knew that these children would not remain children, but the children had a long way to go. Maybe one day when this problem was solved it would be peaceful. Maybe then he would be able to open that coffee shop he always wanted.
A wild Jaune Arc ran into the room and leapt out the window with a Boaratusk following and knocking over Ozpin's desk, stamping its hooves around the room, and wrecking whatever it could find before leaping out the window and squealing as it met its death.
Ozpin stood still before he walked off.
"I'm never going to open that coffee shop."
End
A/N; Also ran out of ideas, so here's this. How about you all send me shorts. I want all the ideas you guys got because I want you to laugh, to smile, and to get drunk. Don't do the last one, but enjoy the story.
