I don't own Nura no Mago
(Kuro's P.O.V)
"Kuro."
"Who is it?" I shouted out into the darkness, looking for the one who called my name. The voice was familiar but it wasn't the usual one, the one that put a small amount of fear in me.
"Kuro, come to me."
I took a hesitant step forward, not knowing where I was going. The complete and utter darkness didn't help much. I wanted to find the owner of that voice that filled me with some warmth. I could feel something trying to break free from the back of my mind, a memory of sort. I remembered the voice, but when I tried to see a face in my head it came out blurry and distorted.
"Kurohime!"
Light suddenly appeared in the distance, engulfing the darkness surrounding me. Something within me told me to run into the light and that's where I would find the person calling me. I headed in the direction I was being pulled towards, my strides getting quicker every passing second. I had no idea why I was so desperate to go into the light, I never liked it all that much. I preferred the dark, even if I despised it at the same time. I didn't like the warmth I could feel from the light because it was something I wasn't used to. I've been cold and distant this whole time, and I knew it went further than my memory loss, but feeling like I was cared for was something entirely new to me. I knew that was what was coursing through the air around me, the concern and kindness from people I've known and just met was filling around me and I didn't know how to react. I pushed my legs to go faster, desperately hoping my memories lie within that light in front of me.
"Kurohime."
I stopped running, blinking my eyes in confusion. The light slowly dissipated, leaving an unusual scene before me. The sky was light, a color I couldn't describe, and a full moon stood out against it. To my left I noticed there was a willow tree, its branches swaying back and forth from the small breeze, a small lake a few feet in front of it. It's water was that of a clear blue and I could see the reflection of the moon from where I stood. I turned my head more to the right, searching for the one who was calling me but I came up empty. I was confused and automatically tensed, waiting for something bad to happen.
"There is no need to have your guard up around me, I would never think to hurt you." The same voice echoed through the serenity before me.
"I would feel more relaxed if I could see who I am talking to." I shouted out. There was a light sound, something along the lines of a giggle, and something moved from behind the tree branches. I gasped as I saw the face of the one who was calling my name. I didn't understand what was going on and I clutched at my chest trying to calm my erratic heartbeat. There was another giggling sound as the person walked closer to me, opening her mouth to speak.
"You should see the face you're making right now, it's so unlike you. Now breath before you faint." Amusement shone in the vibrant pink eyes I stared into that were framed by thick, black lashes. She was a pale as me, her hair the same length as well. The only difference about it was her hair was the blackest I have ever seen. It was darker than the night itself, and I felt like I could lose all senses just staring at it, getting lost in the ea of black. I swallowed past the lump in my throat, trying to force words out of my mouth.
"Who are you?" I didn't expect my voice to come out as a whisper, sounding choked.
"You don't remember?" The look-alike asked. It was then I felt a tug at the back of my mind and I knew I had met this girl before. Flashes of images appeared behind my eyes as I slowly remembered. I saw the festival, the cotton candy and trying to catch up to Rikuo's friends. The trench coat and hidden face burned itself into my head as I tried to quell the rising anger. The extreme pain I felt hit me again, and I could feel a dull throb run through my body. Then it all vanished as that voice spoke to me. I looked into the pink orbs knowing she was smiling as she saw the recognition in my own eyes.
"Who are you?" As I asked the question a second time, it wasn't because I didn't know who it was standing in front of me, because I felt the familiarity, but it was due to the fact I didn't know what her name was. And for some reason that's what mattered most now.
"I'm you. Well in a sense I am, but I'm apart of you. As for my name you can call me what you like although because I'm basically you I've been called your, our, name." I digested the information even if it was hard to understand her rambling.
"Well that's weird to call you Kuro when I'm also Kuro. Even if I did call you Kurohime it would still feel strange." I haven't felt so confused like I was now and all because I didn't know what to call a part of me.
When did my life take a turn towards the weird and insane?
"Well I have also been called Hime, if that will make things easier." I thought about it and looked at the pink-eyed girl. The name seemed to fit her and it just felt right to call her that.
"Alright, Hime," I started, trying the name out on my tongue, "So tell me, where exactly are we?" I looked at my surroundings again, not knowing how to feel about it all.
"This place is something you created. It's the only place you and I can speak face to face, and it's where one of us are sent to as the other takes control of our body." I didn't like it when she said the last part, not really comfortable with the thought of being controlled.
"And what are you? What am I?" Excitement started bubbling up in me and I realized maybe I can finally have all the answers I've been searching for.
"Uh well this will be difficult to explain to you and I don't really know how to say this in a simple way, so just bear with me." I blinked at Hime, signalling her to get on with it. She inhaled deeply, closing her eyes for a few seconds. After she was done with, what I assumed to be, collecting her thoughts, she opened up her eyes. "When people are faced with extreme situations and it ends up leaving them swallowed by pain and anger, and they lash out, it never results to anything good. People filled with those emotions are capable of doing all things dangerous, for them and others. I know you've seen, experienced, felt, such emotions and it leaves you with nothing but an emptiness you can't seem to fill. The truth is you haven't really felt pain and anger at its fullest within you. Well you have, but before you lost your memories. Anyways, when you are faced with a situation that leaves you feeling those emotions at a level so high, you lose all reason, and it, well, let's just say it's something you don't want to get in the way of. Or more like can't...but I'm rambling again so let's get back to the topic at hand, shall we? So when something like that happens, or more precisely, before it can happen, I show up to switch places with you. I'm here to try to take away that pain and anger, or maybe just lessen it. I was created to control you before you do something you'll regret."
I stood rooted to my spot, never once interrupting Hime. I took everything she said in and processed through it all, wanting to fully digest it. I understood completely with what she said in the beginning, agreeing with her, but near the end is where my brain wanted to shut down and not comprehend the words. I don't know what she meant by me losing control over myself and end up doing something that she made sound horrible. It just seemed impossible for me to let something like emotions to take over when I couldn't even feel such things. Maybe the anger, yes, and pain wasn't really an emotion it was something physical and it may cause you to feel something, but not with me. When I get injured I never react to it, I just clean it up or keep attacking if I were in a fight. As I thought about this I realized that Hime never answered my second question, so I asked again. "So what am I?"
I could see uneasiness flash in the pink orbs and Hime ran a hand through her ebony locks. "Uh, well you see, I don't really know the answer to that myself. I might be able to know what you were if I could remember anything before we were eight."
The wind suddenly got chillier as I tried to remember when I was a little girl, but came up empty. There was something baout before then that made me grit my teeth to stop a cry from escaping my mouth, but I didn't know what it was. I felt desperation to know about my childhood, to know everything about me and I couldn't think of what was so important for me to know. Yes, I wanted my memories because it's only natural for you to want to know who you are, but there was something else about my past that made me want to remember it so i could protect those close to me. Problem was I had no one. I looked up at Hime and I could tell she knew what I was thinking that very moment from the the sad, understanding smile she gave me. She wanted to know just as much as I did, but for her it was as if it were for a whole different reason.
"Do you remember anything?" I quietly asked, an icy hand squeezing tightly to my heart.
"I remember everything after the age of eight, but before you ask me, no I can't tell you. You have to remember on your own because if I tell you, you'll only have the words to look back on, not the actual images of your past."
"When will I get my memories back?" I was getting tired of all of this, of being so close to my past and yet so far away.
"It will come to you, don't worry. It will take time but all it requires is for certain events to occur, meeting someone or doing something in particular that will trigger the lost memories." I sighed, not liking her answer. There's 13 years of memories to find and it will take longer just to get them back. I just wanted a way for it all to come to me so I don't have to live in this constant state of emptiness anymore. I was about to ask something else of Hime, but she beat me to it. "We've talked long enough, we will have all the time in the world to sort through this mess another day but now you need your rest."
I was going to object to that because I didn't want to leave. I wanted to stay and talk about me and her, and the shit surrounding us. I wasn't even tired! That's when my vision started blurring, darkness creeping in from the corners. The exhaustion wrapped itself around me like a warm blanket soothing me to sleep. Hime looked as if she were getting smaller and smaller, and I reached out a hand to grab onto her, but fell short. I knew it was useless to fight this but I felt like I needed to. I finally let myself go into the black abyss as my eyes slowly fell shut.
My senses slowly started coming back to me and it felt like I was waking up after sleeping for years. I didn't want to open my eyes, or more like couldn't as my eye lids along with the rest of my body felt weighed down, but the chirping of birds was incessant and annoying. I blinked a few times, trying to get adjusted to the bright light coming from who knows where. I got up cautiously, confused as to where I was. When I noticed I was back in the room I have been staying in for a week I relaxed slightly, although there was some disappointment. I wanted to continue to talk to Hime because I had many unanswered questions for her, but I was forced to leave from my own consciousness. I stretched out the kinks in my body, wondering how I could get back to the place I apparently created.
"There's no need to worry, I'm always here."
I jumped slightly, not expecting to hear Hime's voice echo in the back of my mind. How are you able to do that? I said in my head, hoping Hime really could hear my thoughts.
"Well I'm part of you and I exist in your consciousness so I can hear and see what you yourself hear and see." I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not so I left it at that and got up. I looked around for my clothes and saw them sitting on a small desk underneath the small window, perfectly folded. I briefly wondered how long I had been out and decided to see Rikuo and ask him. I got dressed and slid open the door to my room, stepping out into the hallway. I noticed that it was unusually quiet as I walked quietly down the corridor, seeing no little yokai running about or even Tsurara who was everywhere at once doing some type of chore. After a few minutes of soundless walking I made my way out into the courtyard, hoping to find Tsurara hanging up laundry. My wish was granted as I saw her doing just that and I soon noticed that a brunette boy was standing beside her. I walked closer to them and when I was at least 20 feet away, Rikuo turned his head my way. When he saw me, his eyes lit up, a smile stretching his lips.
"Kuro! How are you feeling?" he asked me with a curious look.
I stopped in front of him and Tsurara, who had already turned around, and replied with a simple, "Fine."
"It's good to see you're OK, we were so worried about you." the yuki-onna said, a genuine smile on her face which startled me. I wouldn't have thought someone could actually get worried over me.
"Yea I spoke with-" I stopped abruptly, wondering if the two in front of me knew about Hime.
"They know about me." Hime spoke to me at the same time Rikuo said, "We talked to her too, right after you fainted."
"That's good, I guess." I wasn't really sure what to say after that so an awkward silence ensued until Tsurara broke through it.
"You know what we should do?" she asked and Rikuo and I looked at her with confusion. "We should go to the mall! You really need new clothes, Kuro, because you only have one pair and that's not right for a girl to only own so little clothing." I was just about to protest to something as horrifying as shopping when she interrupted me. "And I won't take no for an answer."
It had been three hours since we've been here, going from one store to the next. Three hours. I was about to strangle the girl dragging me by the arm, Rikuo being the only reason I didn't do it, and let me tell you, I was seriously tempted to do so. She ignored my complaints and every threat I threw at her, giddy at all the clothes she got to buy. After a while of arguing with her on what I did and didn't like, I gave up and let her do whatever she wanted. I warned her I most likely wouldn't wear any of the girly shit she bought for me but did she listen? Well I think you know that answer to that. It was two in the afternoon and we had gone through practically all the stores, my level of annoyed at an all time high. I was beyond relieved when Rikuo spoke up, saying he was getting tired and that maybe they should get home before it got too late. Tsurara looked somewhat sad, but quickly perked up when Rikuo promised ice cream.
I could definitely go for some ice cream. I thought to myself as I followed the two out of the mall and down a surprisingly deserted street. The three of us didn't find it strange that there was no one else there on the usually busy road. Rikuo and Tsurara were arguing over ice cream flavors while I listened to their pointless conversation. I was the first to notice how the air shifted, an ugly stench wafted out from nowhere. I stopped where I was and dropped the bags I was holding, reaching for my concealed sword.
"Don't you agree, Kuro?" I faintly heard Tsurara ask me, and when she turned to see I stopped, she did so too. Rikuo tensed when he looked to his left, which was my right, and Tsurara immediately got in front of her young master to protect him. I forgot he could only change to is yokai form at night, which left him defenseless during the day.
"Well would you look at that, little Kurohime is playing house with a human and a yokai. How unlike you." a deep, gravelly voice echoed around us as a tall, dark figure emerged from the shadows. He looked just like every other yokai that has been chasing me, but I knew he was different from the rest. He gave off a feeling of superiority and I assumed he was stronger than than the cowardly ones sent after me. I didn't know who he was and he sneered at me as I stood there, one hand on the hilt of my sword. "So it really is true, you have no idea who I am. I'm surprised you don't at least remember me, I was your favorite, besides my master." An image of a trench coat and hidden face flashed before my mind, and I continued to stay silent.
"What do you want." Rikuo demanded and my lips twitched upwards. I had to admit the kid had balls to talk back to something as disgusting and dangerous as the thing a few feet away from us in his human form.
The yokai looked over at Rikuo with annoyance in its beady eyes. "My business isn't with you so why don't you take your pathetic excuse of a guard and go home, kid." I could see the anger in both Tsurara and Rikuo as they were mocked.
"That's right, you're here for me so just leave them alone." I didn't want the two to do something reckless and get themselves killed so I directed the attention of the yokai back to me.
"Oh what's this? Do you actually care about these two? Heh, maybe I can have some fun here after all." I watched in surprise as the forearms on the yokai morphed into an odd shape, slowly forming themselves into blades. I was too distracted by this that I didn't see how the yokai quickly lunged towards Tsurara, who tried to block his attack, but failed. She was flung backwards into a tree, falling down onto the ground. Rikuo called out to her and rushed to her side, making sure she was OK. I narrowed my eyes, anger bubbling to the surface.
"Would you look at that, the almighty Kurohime has emotions!" The yokai cackled, the sound making me want to slit his throat so I wouldn't have to ever hear it again. It turned towards me and went to attack, but I blocked both his arms with my sword, putting in all my strength to hold him back.
"What ever happened to the emotionless bitch who couldn't be bothered with others problems? Did you actually get a heart?" The yokai kept taunting me and the anger was quickly filling every inch of my being. The hideous creature jumped backwards, and I got ready for another attempt to slice me.
"Did you learn your lesson from last time?" I grit my teeth, desperate to not let him win and get me to talk. I didn't know what he was talking about but whatever it was stabbed at my heart, a bitter taste filling my mouth at the same time. The yokai went to attack again, but I parried its blow and aimed for its left arm. It dodged and tried to find an opening in my defenses but I continued to block every attack. This went on for some time and I became frustrated as this annoying thing wouldn't stop talking, but I didn't show any emotion, much to its dissatisfaction.
"It's no surprise your only friends left you." As he said those last words, that's when I let the anger take over me for a brief second. I had no idea what he meant but something in me stirred and I knew there was a memory trying to break free, but that didn't matter to me right now. What I cared about was to make this thing pay for his words. I turned sideways, dodging its right arm and quickly brought my sword down, slicing through the wrinkled gray skin. Blood gushed from the wound as the yokai cried out in pain, momentarily distracted as I pulled back my arm and landed a blow to the creatures face, sending him flying. I walked over to the yokai and stomped on his chest causing him to choke out a cough.
"I don't know who you are and I don't really care, but next time I suggest you watch what you say unless you want to end up with more than a scratch." I sheathed my sword, lifting my foot from the unsightly thing underneath me. The yokai stood up, getting as far away from me as possible and I knew he was going to try and attack again. I wasn't all that surprised to see a blade appear and press against the things throat, drawing some blood. Rikuo was standing behind the yokai, his eyes flashing crimson. I knew he was going to kill the yokai, or at least beat it half conscious so he could question it. It was who he was, how he grew up, and I could understand that.
"Rikuo, let him go." he looked at me in confusion, and I just shook my head. He let the yokai go and it immediately started running away, but I stopped it by calling out, "One more thing. Tell your master that if he wants me so badly to come and get me himself instead of hiding behind his weak errand creatures. Now go before I really do kill you." Rikuo went over to Tsurara, pulling her up. Both looked at me with sadness in their eyes. I picked up the abandoned bags and looked expectantly at the two, who just turned and we continued on our way back to the Nura house in complete silence where all I wanted to do was lay down and fall asleep forever.
I ran faster and faster, desperate to get away from the horror chasing after me. Tears were flowing down my cheeks, blurring my vision. Although it was a chilly night, hair stuck to my face and neck from sweat. I jumped over a fallen tree, tripping and falling to the ground. Rocks dug into my knees and hands and I could feel even more blood gushing forth from my body. I knew I couldn't last longer and I pulls soon faint, or worse. I assumed it would be the later considering the situation I was currently in. I heard the snap of a twig a distance away and I had to move fast if I was going to survive. I had to live through this, if not for me than for her. I got up, the adrenaline still pumping through me, and started running again. I could see some sort of light in the distance and I headed that way, hoping to meet up with everyone. I tried wiping the tears away but the only successfully smeared blood and dirt on my face. I was becoming frustrated with myself, with the fear that was consuming me. I had to right to be afraid when everyone had to deal with such a monster. My legs were starting to burn from all the running and the air was becoming smoky. I knew something wasn't right the moment I inhaled the dark air, and that's when I heard it. That sickening laugh full of evil and hatred echoed around me, causing my fear to increase. It was too late, I was trapped, and she had me.
"You can run but you can't hide, little Kurohime. I know your every move," another snapping sound happened to my right and I tensed, not wanting to see the face of the one who put me in this mess, but I slowly turned around as she finished saying, "after all I am-"
The nightmare was cut short as I felt an insistent shaking and heard my name being shouted into my ear. I quickly sat up and lunged at the person before me, grabbing a hold of their throat. I applied slight pressure as my vision started clearing; the person's face finally registering in my brain. I immediately let go of the person's throat and got as far away from her as possible. I couldn't believe what I just did. I looked down at my shaking hand, clenching it and cursing myself for doing something so stupid. Usually I notice if there is a threat or not nearby, but after being forced out of that dream I got careless and was ready to kill an innocent person. I ran a hand through my hair; feeling disgusted by the sweat on my forehead and neck, and tried to see how much range I did to the unsuspecting victim.
"I'm so sorry Tsurara. I had no idea it was you and-". The yuki-onna cut me off as she stood up and waved my apology away. I knew I had finally fucked things up and that there was no way she would ever forgive me. I didn't know why I felt so bad, I never cared about the consequences of the things I did, but now I was feeling something I never thought I would ever feel. Guilt.
"It's all right, Kuro. It's my fault for waking you the way I did." I was surprised to see the forgiving smile on Tsurara's face. "I was coming to wake you up for dinner when I saw you thrashing around and I got worried. I wanted to wake you up to see if you were OK but I guess I should have tried a gentler approach." Her smile brightened and I shook my head at her. How could she easily shrug off my attempt to kill her as if it were nothing, and then blame it on herself? She was truly an odd one and it was hard to believe she was so nice.
"No it wasn't your fault, I was just freaked out and I thought you were trying to kill me." I was definitely not going into detail about my nightmare, not to anyone.
"Well then, let's just forget about it and I'll find you some new clothes while you take a bath." Tsurara suggested and I looked down at myself seeing and feeling my clothes sticking to me from the sweat. A both sounded wonderful right about now.
"Sounds like a plan." I quickly walked past Tsurara, practically running to the bath. I didn't know what just happened or what was happening to me. I told myself it was because of the dream and went to hopefully scrub the fear and guilt away.
(Narrative)
Rikuo was taking his time in getting to the dining hall, waiting for a certain aid of his to report back to him on the state of a sleeping brunette. It had been hourse since they returned from the mall and that incident occurred, and Kuro went straight to her room and fell asleep. They decided to wait patiently for the girl to wake up to speak with her and make sure she was fine, but the rest of the day passed with no sign of her waking up. He sent Tsurara to see if she was awake yet, or just to see how she was doing, but that was well over 10 minutes ago. He was starting to think that maybe something was wrong and he should be hurrying to see what was holding the yuki-onna up. Rikuo was about to do just that when he heard footsteps thumping loudly behind him. He turned around in time to catch whoever flew into him, black and blue hair flying all over the place. A pair of glistening yellow orbs stared up at her master, not realizing the position they were currently in and quickly called out to him.
"Waka!" Rikuo looked down at Tsurara, wondering what was happening. He noticed her scarf had untied itself and was hanging limply on her shoulders, exposing her silky white skin, or what should have been so. His eyes narrowed in anger as he saw the faint markings of hand prints bruising the porcelain skin and gripped the yuki-onna's arms tightly.
"What the hell happened to you." Tsurara was taken aback as she heard the anger seep through every word as he demanded her to tell him.
"Oh this? It's nothing serious. I went in to see if Kuro was awake, but she was having some sort of nightmare so I went to wake her. She didn't know it was me and must have thought she was still dreaming because she attacked me. It wasn't her fault but she was seriously shaken up and I think somethings wrong." her voice rose in pitch as she finished talking, the worry evident in her eyes. "She also felt so guilty, and I saw something I never thought would come from her. I mean she seems so emotionless and like nothing can scare her but I know it was fear I saw."
That was something Rikuo never thought Kuro of all people could feel. She was someone who could hold her head up through anything, who never backed down. He witnessed such thing today as that yokai taunted her and said things that would have shaken anyone up, and yet she remained stoic. He knew that what you saw on the outside was different from went on in someones mind, but he wasn't used to people hiding their true selves from him. Everyone was so open and true, and then there was Kuro, the girl with no memories and a hidden side to her that never broke through her hardened mask. She wouldn't let anyone in, wouldn't let them see her weaknesses, but that could take a toll on you. If you didn't have at least one person who would always be there for you, who you could rely on and tell your darkest secrets to, then you slowly start to lose yourself. You fade until you're nothing but an empty shell, forced to live in agony by yourself until that very life comes to an end. Kuro was starting to disappear, Rikuo could see it, and if she couldn't find that person to trust, she will never find her back from the darkness she lives in.
Ok so I re posted this, again, and this time I hope I got every mistake. I think this is probably my longest chapter but I changed and added a lot of stuff from what I originally had it as so I guess that's no surprise. It's not really edited and I know I keep saying I'll edit it but the truth is I probably won't until I'm done the story. I also realized I can be a tad bit repetitive so sorry if I have been. Also, if anyone is confused as to what's going on please let me know so I can clear things up for you and anyone who decides to read this story. I have to thank Nayrael for like the millionth time, but this person has helped me so much with this chapter and I love all his reviews, so thanks! That's all I have to say for now so look forward to my next chapter!
R&R
