Nothing makes my day like people giving reviews. Thank you to all who did.
This chapter is angsty, sorry.
Sarah entered Chuck's room, Room 103, and came straight to his bedside. He was looking much better than before, although his nose was a tiny bit crooked. Currently the patient was sleeping, his light snores filling the room. Strangely she had only seen him sleeping once, when he fell asleep during a movie. She loved watching Chuck sleep. Even while he was unconscious, he still looked so peaceful. In fact, she loved everything about him, from his silly Nerd Herd outfit to the goofy grin. Ever since she admitted to loving him at the fountain, only a day earlier, Sarah couldn't stop thinking it.
It made it that more heart wrenching to do what she was about to do.
Unfortunately, she had to wake him. From that peaceful slumber to something that he could never forgive her for. Sarah looked down at him, her eyes full of sadness. No, she would let him sleep a few more minutes. Let him have a few more minutes of a normal life.
She studied him, then. She studied his features, trying to memorize them. From his long eyelashes to his broad hands, from his snow slightly crooked nose to his soft lips. Sarah tried not to think about how painful it must have been to receive those scars on his face. She was used to the pain, being an agent, but to a civilian like Chuck it was probably a lot to handle. And it was her fault. She wasn't there to protect him when he needed her most, and if he had not called her when he had, Chuck might be being tortured, or maybe even dead.
Sarah shook off that feeling and decided it was time to wake him up. It was better for him to know he was leaving and purposely spend more time with friends and family. No one else was there. Ellie, Devon, Morgan, Casey-they all had to work.
Sarah gently shook him, trying to wake him up. Chuck groaned and turned around in his sleep.
"Chuck," she whispered. Wait-why was she whispering?
He stirred but didn't wake. A slight smile appeared on his face, which made Sarah unable to tell whether she was glad or unhappy. She would probably never see him smile again-Chuck would be too upset-but Sarah loved that she had that effect on him.
Or maybe she was just overanalyzing. It probably wasn't her voice that had made him smile. It was probably just some dream he was having. She said his name louder, and finally Chuck opened his eyes halfway.
"Sarah," he groaned. "I'm tired."
"Chuck," she said. "Wake up, it's important."
He opened his eyes fully and propped himself on his elbows. His hair was even more mussed up than usual, and she couldn't help but think it looked good. Sexy, even. What would it be like to wake up in his arms and see that tired face? Wonderful. And more than once? A dream come true.
Goddamnit, she told herself. Get a hold of yourself.
"What?" he asked, seeing her serious. There was something in her eyes-something that made him want to grab her right there and comfort her. Something was seriously wrong.
"Chuck, it's important." Sarah waited for him to fully awaken before delivering the bad news.
"Chuck," she couldn't stop saying his name. "I don't know how to explain it…"
Sarah couldn't help herself. In a matter of seconds her face had crumbled, leaving her extremely vulnerable. Her face showed sadness, nervousness, and desperation.
She didn't need to say it. Chuck knew. In the same amount of time it took for Sarah's face to change, he shot up. Immediately he regretted it, and felt his chest hurt. "But…but…Sarah, you don't mean…?"
She nodded, her eyes glistening.
"Underground?" he whispered. Chuck wanted it so badly to be a joke. It would be a cruel joke, but at least then he would be relieved. This…this was his worst nightmare.
She nodded again.
"But we were finally…" They were finally starting to admit their feelings for each other(he was sure now that she had some). He was getting so close to breaking down that wall she had built up over the past years. He couldn't leave now. He wanted to tell Sarah he loved her. It was true, ever since that kiss. But now it would make the situation even worse, causing more despair of what could have been.
And what about Ellie? And Devon, Morgan…oh God, Morgan. His best friends depended on him and he depended on him. Even in the worst of times, Morgan was always there to be a buddy. Chuck's face twisted in pain. "No…" he whispered. This had to be a dream. He was desperate for it to be a dream.
"Chuck, I tried. They wouldn't listen, I couldn't show that I had become attached."
He was so upset that he couldn't even be happy that she had just admitted she liked him. He was too busy trying to make sense of everything. Chuck tried to not cry, but his eyes were already red. "This happened to fast. There has to be some other way. What will you tell everyone? Sarah, Ellie is my life. Same with Morgan, Devon, the Nerd Herd…you. What will you tell them? Please don't let it be me dying…couldn't you tell them the truth this once?"
Sarah shook her head sadly. "I wish I could. Chuck, I wish I could take this all back. Go back to before. I even wish you had never received the Intersect. That way we wouldn't be in this situation."
The world was suddenly spinning. Life hadn't been the best, but at least he still had everyone he cared about. Chuck lay back down in the bed, in case his body decided to faint, which often happened in overwhelming situations. "When?" he asked fearfully.
This was the worst part. Sarah sighed, gathering courage. "A few days. When your condition is more stable."
Chuck buried his head in his pillow. Sarah watched him, wanting to do something, anything, to comfort him. But it was useless. Nothing would help.
He mumbled something, but it got muffled by the pillow. When Chuck realized that she couldn't hear, he raised his so that he could see her face, which was contorted in pain and covered in tears. "Please…just go," he choked out.
The words hit Sarah like a bullet. Out of the reactions she had planned out, Chuck sending her away was not one of the ones she expected. She thought that maybe he would want her to stay with him. But now she realized that that was just her heart's wishes. Sarah nodded, her eyes brimming with tears, and walked out.
She stared through the room window and watched Chuck turn away from her, to face the opposite wall. She couldn't see his face, but it was obvious from his body movements that he was sobbing. It was then that Sarah let the tears let loose.
