Hurky: Hey guys!
Readers (applauding): YAY!
Hurky: And boy do I have a chapter for you guys! I had a little help from Ryo.
Ryo (takes a bow and the readers applaud)
Hurky: So here we go!
The next day, everyone woke up early, got dressed, and went to the kitchen to make breakfast. Ansem was going totally crazy over the new cereal, called Goodeez.
"Ooh, Goodeez!" said Ansem. "YUMMY!"
He outstretched his hands for the box of the cereal, but Riku snatched the box away.
"Silly Ansem, Goodeez are for good guys!" he said. Then, he laughed like a hyena.
"Aw..." whined Ansem. "But you were once a bad guy!"
"Not on my own free will!" said Riku. "That doesn't count!"
Aerith gave Riku a really evil look. "Riku, give Ansem his cereal, or else!" she said.
"Or else what?" asked Riku.
"I'll have your car painted green!" said Aerith.
"Fine." said Riku. He handed Ansem the cereal and Ansem hungrily poured the cereal into a cereal bowl, dumped milk on it, and chowed down on it.
"Could this get any worse for Riku?" asked Sora jokingly.
Suddenly, out of complete randomness, the doorbell rang.
"I wonder who could that be..." Kairi wondered aloud.
"Let me get the door!" said Riku, who was a little hyper from eating the first half of the box of Goodeez cereal. He got out of his seat, darted for the door, and opened it, only to open his mouth in shock to find a guy who looked just like him, wearing a sweatshirt, jeans, black converse shoes, and plastic nerd glasses with black rims that almost everyone wears.
"Hey, Riku." he heard himself say. "I'm baaccck!"
"Oh, snap!" cried Riku.
"Who is it, Riku?" called Yuffie.
"Oh, just the wind!" lied Riku.
"Step aside, dweeb." said the guy as he pushed the completely shocked Riku aside.
Sora, Kairi, Ryo, Hurky, Rachael, Aerith, Yuffie, Leon, Cloud, Ansem, Axel, and Sephiroth all ran to the door to find...
"Ryan?" asked Sora.
Ryan stared at Sora. "Hey, Sore-ass." he said.
Sora gritted his teeth in anger. "It's Sora!" he cried.
"Besides, you know everyone calls me Rep." said Ryan.
"What are you doing here, Rep?" asked Riku. "I thought you were at Hollow Bastion Boarding School for Boys!"
"Yeah, but there was a terribleincident involving dynamite and cherry bombs dropped down the toilets." said Rep as he put an arm around his twin. "I was so disturbed by the explosions, I asked Mom and Dad to take me out!"
"I didn't know you had a twin brother, Riku." said Yuffie.
"Well, I do." said Riku. "Sadly, we're identical!"
"And I'm the older one!" said Rep as he let go of Riku. "I was born 1 hour and 26 minutes before my little bro here. He also wears glasses!"
"Yeah, but unlike you, I wear contacts!" said Riku.
"And Mom and Dad also got me contacts, too." said Rep. "I just don't likewearing them that much."
"How did you find me here?" asked Riku.
"Mom and Dad told me you were here, at Uncle Brian's haunted house." replied Rep. "You're all staying here for a week, right? Well, I'm going to join you guys!"
He went to the door, picked up a backpack, and went upstairs.
"OMG, you have a twin?" squealed Ryo.
"He's my evil twin." said Riku. "Even when we were babies, he'd smack me when our parents weren't looking, leave toys in the hall and say that it was me, always made me look dumb, but he is a genius. He'd do all sorts of bad things, but my parents thought he was a great kid, since he had better grades than me, a 4.0 GPA, and was better than me at everything. I was just the twin with a 2.9 GPA and was average, and I was blamed for everything. Finally, our school recommended that Rep should be put in a private boarding school that had a higher level of education, since he was so smart, so they did. My parents saw him as a genius and a nice guy, but I saw him for who he really was. An evil genius, but my parents were like, 'No, Rep's the good one. Why can't you be more like him?' and-"
"Okay, Riku, I think that's enough badmouthing your twin." said Leon.
"You're just jealous!" said Hurky.
"I am not!" protested Riku. "Also, before he went to boarding school, he turned out basement into a lab. Nobody was ever allowed there."
"I've always wanted to go in there!" said Sora. "I'm with Riku. Rep makes fun of me, calls me Sore-ass and kept hitting on Kairi!"
"He was hitting on me?" asked Kairi.
"Uh...never mind." said Riku.
As the morning progressed, everyone hung around to get to know Rep by bombarding him with questions.
"So, Rep, what's it like to be a genius?" asked Sephiroth.
"Really, really smart!" joked Rep. "Nah, it really feels no different than being a complete airhead like you."
Everyone laughed, except Sephy when he realized that Rep called him an airhead.
"HEY!" he cried.
"Am I pretty?" asked Yuffie.
"Prettier than a goddess." said Rep.
"Which came first, the chicken or the egg?" asked Axel.
"That's basically a rhetorical question." replied Rep.
"What's a rhetorical question?" asked Cloud.
"A question that cannot be answered." answered Rep.
Ryo walked in with a turkey sandwich, some potato chips, and a can of soda.
"Oh Rikuuu!" called Ryo. "I made you lunch!"
"I ain't not hungry, now scram!" cried Riku angrily.
"RIKU WADE THOMPSON!" yelled Rep. "Is that any way to treat a lady? Or any way to answer a question? I mean, 'I ain't not hungry, now scram?' It's 'I am not hungry, but thanks anyway!' But treat your girlfriend a little better! She deserves someone better than you!"
"How about you?" asked Yuffie.
"Well...OK!" said Rep. "Ryo, how about I take you to lunch? My treat!"
"I guess." replied Ryo after thinking for a minute.
"Great!" said Rep. "Go get your coat!"
"But it's 95 degrees outside!" said Hurky.
"Right, this isn't Hollow Bastion!" said Rep as he clapped a hand to his forehead. "I'm on an island, now!"
They went out the door. Riku was angry.
"Riku, are you jealous that Rep took Ryo?" asked Kairi.
"No!" lied Riku as he gritted his teeth.
"We know you are!" said Yuffie.
"Riku, you had your chance with Ryo." said Leon. "You only want her because Rep has her."
"Man, will everyone just...chill for a second?" said Riku as he threw his hands into the air in frustration. "I am not jealous that Rep has Ryo and besides, he's just taking her out to lunch!"
"Well, what if it's a date?" asked Axel.
"Axel's right, it basically is." said Aerith.
"You know, I'm going to stop my twin brother!" announced Riku. "Sure, he may be older and smarter, but can he ever be as cool as I am?"
He marched out the room and ended up marching into the door.
"Ow, my nose!" whined Riku from the front door. Then, he opened the door and ran out.
Everyone just stood there in silence. Finally, Sora broke it when he asked, "Who wants to play strip poker?"
"WHAT?" cried Hurky, Kairi, Yuffie, Aerith, and Rachael. "NO FREAKING WAY!"
"Dammit." said Cloud.
"How about we play Monopoly?" asked Kairi.
"Boorrrriiinnnggg!" echoed Sora.
"Are you kidding?" asked Ansem. "That takes hours. I have better things to do than play some silly little board game!"
"Then let's play charades!" said Axel. "I'll start. Who am I?"
He started to flap his arms like a chicken and then Leon knocked him out.
"Ooh, Mr. Whiskers!" said Sora stupidly.
Hurky: Well, I'm way too sleepy to finish. I'm going to bed.
Sora: Then I'll entertain! I'll be here all night! (starts dancing)
(Crickets sound and everyone's snoring, including Riku on the couch.)
Sora: Then screw this! I'm getting into my rubber ducky PJs and curling up with a good book! (walks out of room)
Hurky: Whatever. Good night, everyone! Or good morning or afternoon or evening...whenever time of day you read this...
