Series: VOY
Codes: C/Tvk
Rating: NC17
Categories: Humour, First Time.

Disclaimer: These characters are the property of Paramount-Viacom. I just borrowed them and am not writing for profit.

Summary: The crew of Voyager find it impossible to mind their own business.

Warnings: This is NC17 rated so graphic descriptions of m/m sex.

Author's Note: This story was originally completed in May 2001 and I was really excited when it won 1st place for Voyager Misc M/M slash in the Star Trek GO Awards!


Command Logic - Chapter 9


Chakotay did not see Tuvok again until the next day when he saw him, from a distance, in the mess hall at breakfast. The previous day, Tuvok had not reappeared on the bridge until after Chakotay's shift had finished, but the Captain had informed him that Tuvok had reported that he was no further in his investigation of the strange sabotage attempt. The Captain was inclined to see it as a rather lame joke, but insisted that they keep a sharp lookout for any further attempts.

Chakotay had not slept well. All night he had been suffering with a rather strong feeling of guilt. What on earth had possessed him to accuse Tuvok of attempting to set him up for a forced meeting? He'd been so quick to condemn Tuvok for trying to make a fool of him, and instead had made a complete fool of himself all on his own, not to mention injuring Tuvok in the process.

Chakotay knew himself well enough to know that he had an absolute horror of being made to look a fool, and it had happened far too often in recent years for him to ever be able to trust easily. First had been his recruitment of Tom Paris into the Maquis, what a disaster that had been. Then he'd recruited Seska and Tuvok and both of them had turned out to be spies. Out of the two of them, Tuvok's betrayal had hurt him the most. Seska had always been passionate about the cause, but Tuvok had fought for the Maquis with cool, calm logic, and it had made Chakotay feel secure that the Maquis were right to do what they were doing.

He thought he had gotten over that in the last year, but his behaviour on the previous day had shown him that he was still too quick to distrust the Vulcan. Perhaps that was why he had been so affronted when Tuvok had attempted to rush the intimacy of their relationship.

All in all, Chakotay now felt even more confused about what he wanted from Tuvok. He was still attracted to him, but could he ever learn to trust him? By the time he finished his meal and got to the bridge, he'd decided that the best thing to do would be just to leave the whole mess alone. It was for the best if nothing happened between him and Tuvok; the whole thing was just too difficult. The problem was he still owed Tuvok an apology and an explanation and he would have to do both as soon as possible.


His opportunity came sooner than he'd thought it would. Chakotay had barely finished his checks and sat down next to the Captain, when B'Elanna commed from engineering.

"Commander, I'm running some diagnostics about that security failure yesterday, and I need to show you and Lieutenant Tuvok the results I've gotten so far. Could you both come down to engineering?"

Chakotay glanced at the Captain, who nodded her agreement, and then stood and walked back to the security station, where Tuvok was gazing at him enigmatically.

"We're on our way, B'Elanna. Chakotay out," he said and followed Tuvok into the turbolift.

Tuvok directed the lift to engineering and then they stood side by side in silence. Chakotay fidgeted slightly as tension flooded into his body, but he decided that it was better to get it over with and turned to Tuvok.

"Lieutenant," he said firmly. "I believe I owe you an apology for yesterday. I'm afraid I jumped to some conclusions which were completely unwarranted."

"Thank you, Commander," replied Tuvok. "I must assure you that I would never take advantage of a ship related matter to…"

"Good, that's good," Chakotay interrupted quickly in slight panic, but then he steeled his nerves. "Um… about that. I think it would be best, Tuvok, if we just forgot the whole thing. I apologise if I have been rude to you in any way about it, but I would really prefer it if we just forgot about it."

Tuvok had turned to face him and was now looking down at Chakotay with a slight frown. Chakotay found himself feeling slightly intimidated by the Vulcan's close proximity and height, and flushed in annoyance.

"Chakotay," began Tuvok but he was immediately interrupted by a slight shudder in the turbolift. They both glanced around in alarm as the lights flickered, and then stared at each other in consternation as the lift came to a halt and the lights went out, leaving only the dim glow of the emergency lighting.

"I don't believe this," said Chakotay and hit his combadge. "Chakotay to engineering. B'Elanna what is going on? The turbolift I'm in has just lost power."

"I know, Commander," came B'Elanna's voice. "There's a slight problem, I'm working on it now. Should be all right in a few minutes. Torres out."

"Great," muttered Chakotay. "This better not be another one of those strange sabotage attempts."

"Chakotay," said Tuvok calmly. "May I ask why you prefer to forget our relationship, or to be exact, our attempt to have one?"

Chakotay stared at Tuvok in shock. "Lieutenant I don't believe this is the appropriate time to discuss this. We're stuck in the turbolift."

"I am aware of that," replied Tuvok. "However, all we can do is wait for the turbolift to be repaired."

"Well, I suppose you're right," agreed Chakotay reluctantly. "Right, well, we haven't exactly got off to a good start, and I've come to realize… well, that is… oh damnit, I have a problem trusting you completely, and a relationship without trust is a relationship not worth having."

Tuvok raised an eyebrow. "You have difficulty trusting me," he stated in a flat voice. "What exactly do you fear I would do to betray your trust?"

Chakotay was speechless. That's the problem with Vulcans, he thought, they throw that impeccable logic at you and suddenly you don't know what you were talking about.

"I hadn't actually thought that far," he finally admitted sullenly. Then he brightened as an idea came to him. "Well, you might have an affair, and any relationship I had would have to be strictly monogamous."

Chakotay thought for a moment that Tuvok's mouth twitched slightly but in the dim light he couldn't be sure, and when the Vulcan spoke again it was in his usual flat tones.

"I assure you Commander, that Vulcans are a strictly monogamous species. Once we are bonded, whether it is a mating bond or a Pon Farr bond, we only feel the need for our mate, until the bond is broken. In fact, Vulcans are more successful at monogamous relationships than most humanoid species, including your own."

Chakotay was again shocked. He could not believe that Tuvok had just told him so much about the Vulcans secretive mating habits. He was also feeling extremely silly, and that feeling was starting to make him angry.

"Well, thank you for that explanation, Tuvok," he finally said. "However I still think it would be better…"

He broke off in consternation as Tuvok suddenly stepped close to him and took his hand.

"Do you truly feel that you cannot trust me?" Tuvok asked him. "If that is so, then I must earn your trust. Will you give me the chance to do so?"

Chakotay's heart pounded in sudden excitement and fright and he quickly pulled his hand away.

"What on earth is happening with this lift?" he said breathlessly and then hit his combadge. "Chakotay to Torres. What's going on there?"

"Still working on it, Commander. Few more minutes. Torres out."

Tuvok was still standing close to him and Chakotay took a swift step backwards.

"Commander…"

"I'm beginning to wonder if there is anything actually wrong with this lift," said Chakotay frowning. "B'Elanna sounded too nervous."

"Chakotay…"

"I have a feeling I've found our saboteur," Chakotay muttered to himself, still frowning.

"Commander Chakotay!"

"We'd better find our own way out of here," said Chakotay, and he looked up at the ceiling.

"Chakotay, you are avoiding my question," said Tuvok, with just a hint of frustration in his voice.

"No, I'm not," said Chakotay, and Tuvok's eyebrow almost disappeared over his head. "I'm choosing not to answer it. Now, ship's business comes first. We need to get out of this lift."

Tuvok's frustration grew at this response from Chakotay. He was trying his best to follow the Commander's demands but he was beginning to feel that Chakotay was always changing the rules. He couldn't help wondering why, if Chakotay was really attracted to him, was he so determined to make it so difficult?

"Very well," he said. "I agree ship's business comes first. Will you agree to talk about this at a later time, perhaps over dinner tonight?"

Chakotay was tempted to say no immediately but found himself hesitating. He remembered the way he'd felt when Tuvok had held his hand earlier, and there was still that mind-blowing kiss to consider as well. He couldn't be afraid to trust someone forever, or he would be alone all his life. Still, he could be careful.

"Ok," he agreed, "but in the mess hall. Now can you hoist me up and I'll get the top panel off."

Tuvok nodded and knelt down on one knee, and Chakotay immediately realized with a kind of delicious horror that he was about to be as physically close to Tuvok as he had been when they had kissed. He climbed up onto Tuvok's shoulders extremely thankful that the Vulcan could not see his flushed face.

Chakotay reached up and removed the panel and then gripped the sides of the opening, ready to haul himself through. His combadge chirped.

"Commander Chakotay, this is Lieutenant Carey in engineering. I've just discovered that the power to your turbolift has been turned off. I can see no reason for this, so I shall restore power immediately. My apologies, Carey out."

"Wait," said Chakotay frantically. "Be aware…"

Before he could move, the lights came up and the turbolift moved. They both immediately lost their balance and toppled to the floor, Chakotay landing heavily on Tuvok, who had fallen at an awkward angle.

He scrambled up as quickly as possible and then stared down at Tuvok in concern.

"Are you all right?"

Tuvok sighed wearily. "No, Commander. I appear to have broken my ankle."