AN: chellooo my sweeties, what's going up or down. Hehe presentinnnngggg chapter ninnnnnnne

NARUTO: FUCK U JUST START THE STORY!

ME: *tears* I was just getting the crowd exciting what did I do wrong

NARU: you were born and that's a good enough reason for me

Me: but I-

NARU: listen closely...no one. Gives. A. Fuck ok *sweet smile*

ME: *shock*

SASU: *SMIRKS*

Disclaimer: no own as we all know

Warning: sakura's mouth, CROSSDRESSING and mpreg

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+,-, pink, blue, pregnant, or non-pregnant
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As I stood looking at the colorful boxes that held some woman's fate in there hands I couldn't help but feel excited.

I am odd and new experiences excite me, as I began feeling the cart with about 10 pregnancy test (I might as well buy some for sakura just in case she needed them) I felt a firm pat on my shoulder.

I turned and when I saw who it was my brain instantly began searching for an excuse as to why I'm in this area that was meant for woman which of course I am not.

It was sasuke.

He looked at me with a deep confusion that was boardering along the lines of suspicion that I had lost my mind.

I felt my cheeks tingle with a heavy blush.

"I- for a friend" I muttered quickly and left him still standing there even more confused. I mean I couldn't tell him that I was going to try it out for fun...that was just...sick.

As I came into the house and raced upstairs, ignoring sakuras insistent yells of my name. I quickly close the door to my room and locked it.

During my time surfing on my laptop I had met a few friends, they think I'm a girl but I don't mind because they are good people and they have helped me through all of my worries by giving me advice and such. There is not many of those in this world anymore.

I almost drop my laptop as I tried to hurry into the bathroom with both the laptop and the bag carry my special materials filling my arms.

I set the bag onto the toilet and open my laptop to see if my friends are online.

REQUESTED TO JOIN CHAT FROM:

SaND SOuls and LOVErOfKAKAshi (AN: I'm going to shorten all the usernames during the conversation)

Great! They were already chatting.

GOLDENramen: heeeyyyyyy guys wassup

Sand: we were waiting for you

golden: course u guys were jk jk :)

Lover: sooooooo did ya get 'the stuff'

Golden: Yup Yup I got it with me now

Sand: don't request a video chat cuz #1 neji iz with me and #2 I really don't wanna see you peeing on a stick

Golden: blah blah u n neji r like luv sick puppies LOL

Sand: ur jealous

Golden: ...0.0 harsh

Lover: I can't take it anymore even 'kashi wanna know so just take the dam thing lol

Golden: o well spread my business all over the world y don't cha jk ok give me a sec

Sand: ur gonna need more then a sec

Lover: lol srry o and juss remember we r here for you

Golden: k moment of truth

I giggle to myself because I know I'm just getting them ready and excited for nothing, I'm a guy I can't get pregnant but this still could be fun.

I grab a box labeled Clear Blue Easy Pregnancy test.

'Ok so I have to just pee on this thing...doesn't sound to hard unsanitary maybe but not hard.' I thought to myself as I speed read through the instructions.

I pull up my baby blue skirt, pulled down the suffocating Orange lacy panties, aimed and urinated on the stick, once I was done I sat the test onto a napkin, fixed my clothes, washed my hands and began typing.

Golden: the deed is done now all we hav to do iz wait

Sand: ...

Lover: Omg I'm shaking

DolphinLover has joined the chat.

Golden: hey kashi

Sand: hi

Lover: I thought u just went to work

Dolphin: I did I just want to c for myself

Lover: ur calling me a liar!

Golden: we r all friends here and u guys r lovers so play nice

PuffyClouds has just joined the chat

Puffy: update me and quick cuz I have so much homework that it should be against the law...such a drag

Lover: lol I'm a teacher so u better do your homework its gonna help u n the future.

Sand: naru just took the test

Puffy: *ignores Iruka* and

Dolphin: we r still waiting

Golden: guys I'm scared to look

Naruto laughed as he 'played the role' of a nervous girl.

Lover: we r here for u just know that watever happens is for the best

Sand: just look

THIRD PERSON POV

Naruto giggled and grabbed the test, he was about to throw it away and say it was negative when something caught his eye.

'+... doesn't that mean pregnant' naruto thought to himself while his smile slowly dropped to a frown of confusion and began to sweat as he fumbled with the box's instructions.

"- means not pregnant and + means pregnant" he said reading out loud.

This is stupid, naruto thought to his self, turning to the bag he grabbed all of the remainder of the 9 pregnancy test and after peeing on all of them he began nervously pacing.

Sand: helloooo

Puffy: well I guess we just got our answer

Lover: naru r u ok wat did it say

Dolphin: Iruka give her time

Naruto, feeling annoyed at the constant 'bings' began typing furiously.

Golden: EVERYONE JUST BE QUIET IT'S WRONG I'M NOT PREGNANT! BOYS DON'T GET PREGNANT I TOOK THIS PREGNANCY TEST AS A FUCKING JOKE I DNT UNDERSTAND Y IT'S COMING OUT POSITIVE.

Dolphin: ...ur a guy?

Lover: ok calm down just take more its ok...just a small mistake

Sand: the fuck?!

Puffy: I say do wat Iruka says and just calm down ...its wrong just like u said ...if ur a guy cuz that's impossible

DestinyIzAll HAS JOINED THE CHAT

Destiny: gaara just told me wat happened...iz this even possible or is this guy kidding?!

Lover: naruto take a deep breath and check the test

Naruto obeyed, he took a deep and turned to his fate.

+ + + pregnant pregnant pregnant pink pink +

Naruto dropped to the floor still in shock. This was fucking ludicrous.

'I have lost my mind yeah that's it I'm losing it' naruto thought smiling and pulling his flawless legs up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them.

Lover: its time for a video chat I think he is freaking out

Sand: I think he is pranking us and I'm not falling for it.

Puffy: lets do a video chat

Destiny: I'm with gaara he is just pranking us but yea let's do a video chat

As everyone one by one began to join the video chat each one sent a request to naruto. Desperately hoping that the boy was kidding or that he didn't do something reckless.

Naruto stared with wide eyes off into space. Going though different ways to not go insane.

' no no No NO! It's not possible no.' The thing that brought him back was from his near panic attack was the the constant alert sounds coming from his computer, he quickly grabbed his laptop that was sitting on the edge of the sink, he sat it on the floor and joined the video chat.

" ok I would like the real story" Neji said.

"Now is not the time because you already heard what it was, naruto your going into shock you need to snap out of it." Iruka yelled beginning to fear for the CROSSDRESSING boy.

"Naruto just drop the act we all know your a girl and your just pranking us." Gaara said dryly.

Naruto's eyes rolled from the ceiling then to the computer screen. He stared abit as if trying to process what gaara had said, once he processed it his face twisted in anger.

"FUCK YOU!" he yelled into the screen and then hurled the laptop across the bathroom( luckily it landed onto the rug by the tub). Naruto grabbed hand fulls of his silky blonde hair then began tugging it furiously.

It was to much...way to much, he could handle being treated worst then scum because he could just bury his feelings inside but with a kid, they needed attention, love, and care. You couldn't just put them Aside. WHAT THE HELL WAS HE GOING TO DO WITH A BABY!

"No no No" He shouted then jumped as the song 'Someone Like You by Adele' sounded from his Iphone.

It was Iruka.

When naruto first started chatting, him and Iruka hit it off almost instantly then came along gaara then the others but something about Iruka calmed him, so they took it further and they traded numbers.

"H-hello" naruto answered in a shaky voice, he was minutes away from crying uncontrollably even though he promised his self that he would never cry again when he was 10.

" naruto I want you to breath." Iruka said immediately giving the stressed and confused child advice.

"I-I I can't." Naruto said feeling his eyes water...yes it was safe to say he was beyond scared.

" you can just try it." Iruka said, his calming voice soothing naruto.

Naruto didn't stop taking beep breaths until he knew for sure that he was calm, Iruka encouraging him gently along the way.

"Ok now I want you to get back online, the others are worry especially gaara and kashi won't stop calling me." Iruka said firmly then laughing.

Naruto took one last deep shaky breath in and smiled. He was grateful to have people like them to help him along with this. He walked over to his fallen laptop, picked it up, turned it on then signed in and almost instantly he was bombarded with questions and shouts about what had happened.

Naruto smiled sheepishly, and waved.

"Drop the act naruto faking happiness is not going to fix anything." Shikamaru said with a bored tone not even looking up from his honors geometry homework.

Even though it might not have been shikamaru's intentions, his words hit naruto so hard that he jumped as if someone scared him. That was the only thing keeping him together all these years...his mask...was his security blanket, he would be naked without it...putting the problem aside and just smiling was all he knew how to do, but it was true what shika said...IT. WOULDN'T. SOLVE. A. DAMN. THING... It never did...his mask was just that...a mask..it could only cover up the darkness a despair that lie underneath it.

Naruto's eyes began to water and his breathing sped up as all the pain he previously ignored and buried was now surfacing...his mask..was cracking...memories were flooding threw.

'Your a dog...worthless...no one will ever what you.' The harsh voices of the orpans and caretakers filled his head like rain filled a river but his rain was tears and his river was sorrow.

Not hearing him respond everyone stopped what they were doing and watched naruto who was frozen and beginning to shake.

"FUCK HE IS HAVING A FUCKING NERVOUS BREAK DOWN!" Shika yelled jumping up not caring if his books were damaged or his notes ruined from the fall out of his lap.

Iruka jumped up also and began yelling into the speaker.

"NARUTO BREATH REMEMBER BREATH...GOD DAMMIT KAKASHI CALL THE AMBULANCE." He said panicked.

"NO YOU CAN'T, think of what scientist will do to a pregnant boy..A MALE THAT IS PREGNANT...THEY WILL RUIN HIM DOING ALL KINDS OF EXPERIMENTS ON HIM!" Gaara shot back angrily at Iruka.

" GAARA CALM DOWN." Neji yelled angry that his lover was unsettled.

Naruto's body jolted a few time then he went unconscious.

"FUCK THIS WHERE DOES HE LIVE." Gaara yelled wishing they would say they didn't know so he could beat the living hell out of them.

"H-h-he said something about Beverly Hills." Iruka stammered nervously as the look gaara had on his face filled him with dread.

"Well get ready for our first meet up cause that's where we ALL ARE GOING." As soon as kakashi said this everyone went offline.

2 HOURs LATER

Sakura was sitting on the couch enjoying the movie Titanic (just to pass time) when loud bangs could be heard on the door.

Sighing she got up and opened the door to 6 sweaty men (added Kiba shikamaru's lover) all asking different questions all at once.

" SHUT THE FUCK UP." She shouted and instantly the men went silent.

" what the fuck do you sexy ass men want." She said feeling annoyed that these fuckable men had to see her in her pajamas.

"Does a naruto live here." Iruka said becoming tired of saying that line, they had been to over 20 houses so far.

"Who's asking." Sakura asked suspiciously.

"We are his friends he invited us over." Kakashi said calmly.

"O ok you guys should've just said so." Sakura said and letting them in.

"His room is upstairs to the right and its and orange door." Sakura announced then seated herself back onto the couch.

"O and he has been acting weird so I don't think he is up for an all out orgy but I am if ya guys need one more person." She yelled out.

The men ignored sakura and made there way upstairs in silence which was broken by Kiba.

"Who is this guy, he got serious bank look at this house." He said clearly clueless of who naruto was, shikamaru only brought him along because he needed a ride and Kiba had a car.

"Ignore him" shika said calmly. As they stopped in front of a orange door that was opened revealing a unconscious naruto in the arms of a very confused sasuke holding one of the many pregnancy test that lined the sink.

"What a drag." Shikamaru said running his hands through his hair.

And what a drag this was as the truth continued to unfold into a downward spiral of chaos.

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