-Sora's POV-
I sigh and watch as Talia follows Deidara out of the room, fuming with rage. Well now here I am left alone to slave over a hot stove. I turn and bump into Itachi, oh I almost forgot Itachi was here. I look up at him and he looks down at me, we stand there for a minute before the oven dings. I find an oven mitt and carefully remove the cookie tray and place the other in afterwards. I shut the door and strip off the glove and hop up on the counter. Itachi is staring at the cookies.
"You can have one once they've cooled down," I say, "That way you don't burn yourself."
"How does she do it?" he asks.
"What do you mean?" I am kind of confused now.
"How can she just make you so hyper but when she's gone your so calm."
"I told you she just makes me go crazy sometimes, we just click," I chuckle.
"Why weren't you like that before?"
"Well my friends weren't really the type to shout out swear words and talk about things like that. But I guess I kind of did but I never wanted to say anything that may offend them so I would hold back. Then I met Talia and I said stuff like that and she would just love it. I guess she kind of just helped me come out of my shell and showed me that just because I think differently from others doesn't mean they'll dislike or judge me."
"I see," he says, "But your personality is more twisted than hers?"
"Sometimes, I say things that sometimes freak her out, I don't know I can't help it sometimes, its like word vomit."
"Like threatening to dunk Deidara's penis in acid?"
"Well that was me being uncreative, I could do worse I assure you." I say with a smirk.
"I'll take your word for it then."
I look at the cookies and pick one up off the tray and take a bite, and let out a quiet moan. Peanut butter and chocolate, my one weakness. Itachi is eye balling me with a look in his eyes that I have not seen before, but I like it. He reaches for his own cookie and begins to eat it. A tiny, almost microscopic smile slips almost unnoticed onto his lips, and I feel satisfied. I go to reach for another without looking and touch the hot pan and let out a yelp. Pulling my finger back quickly, when I look up Itachi is in front of me holding my hand gently in his. I hold back the gasp in my throat, his eyes run over the little wound, his fingertips ghosting it. I feel a shiver starting at the base of my spine but I hold it down. I feel a tiny stream of chakra extend from his finger into mine, soothing and fixing the burn before it can even try to blister. I blush lightly and meet his gaze, God he is so close, fucking inner Talia is tweaking right now. 'Your close enough to kiss the Uchiha bastard!' The Talia shouts and I try not to say anything out loud but God she is right. There is probably only six inches between our faces.
"What were you doing?" he asks quietly.
"Reaching for a cookie," I whisper innocently, looking up at him, his eyes spin with that emotion I can't name.
He reaches to the side, his eyes never leaving mine, and grabs a cookie and gently places it in my hand and moves slightly away. I place the cookie timidly in my mouth, feeling self conscious.
"You could get a cookie too," I mumble through my cookie.
His eyes spin, the look intensifies and suddenly he leans forward and takes a bite of the cookie in my mouth. Oh God he is so close, I can feel his breathe on my face. He pulls away and chews on the other half of my cookie. I feel heat rise to my cheeks, the shiver rushing up my side and through my body. God I hope he didn't notice. I finish my cookie end and look up at him through my eyelashes.
"There are others cookies you know, you didn't have to steal mine," I whisper looking over at the cookie tray, when I look back he is gone, I gasp.
I sit up from the counter my body still running with shivers, I let out a shaky breath and almost scream when the oven dings and signals the end of the second pan of cookies.
Itachi's POV
I almost did it, I almost let my façade slip, how could I be so stupid. I stop in the hallway and glare down at the floor, God the image won't leave. The innocent look in her eyes, the way she looked up through her eyelashes. The way she blushed, and the shiver she tried to hide as I got closer to her. God this is only fueling the fire, I must hold back. I cannot let anything like that happen again, I can't let her see.
-Talia's POV-
I bit my lip, holding back any and all negative things I want to say- and it's hard. Deidara had decided to bring me to the living room so I could show him how to play the game he had discovered earlier- my Fable game. Honestly I was, and still am, surprised he didn't drag me away into his room. And of course he can't just let me be- nope. He holds the controller with one hand and has his arm around me with the other. Though it made playing the game harder, even with my instruction, he wouldn't move his arm away. He seemed comfortable with the controller resting in his lap and maneuvering the controls with one hand so this wasn't going to stop any time soon.
Oh- did I mention he sucks at Fable? Cause he does. I can't say so of course, and I swear he's doing terrible just to piss me off. I can't stand it when people screw up the simplest of tasks…
"It helps if you use both hands." I bitterly say once again.
"It'd be more fun if you did it for me, un." Deidara chuckles .
"Yeah well-!" I stop myself, the rest of my sentence turning into a muffled growl. "I hate my life…"
Deidara laughs lightly as he leans on me then playfully says, "You know you really want me, hn."
In the calmest tone I can muster I say, "I dislike you with great intensity…"
"I'll let that one slide for now, un." Deidara turns his attention back to the game to find a prostitute has approached him- and it's a female one too. Now he's playing as my second character so the issue of the morality going up or down doesn't both me- I just don't want him discovering you can have sex with the NPCs of the game.
"'Ows about a nice roll in the hay?" The whore in the game offers while gesturing the Hero Princess over with her index finger.
I slap my hand on my forehead- groaning in frustration. Deidara simply stares at the TV, confused. "Roll in the…oh.. Oh! Is that woman saying she'll have sex with me, un!" Deidara sounds surprised and he looks at me in disbelief.
I grin- unable to suppress my perverted tendencies, "Yeah she wants to fuck your brains out." Deidara smirks. "Ah wait- I mean-"
"No please- continue, un. Do I get to see it, hn?"
"No! Of course not! You just hear it and the bed creaking and junk."
"Pff- that's no fun, un." Deidara huffs, sinking back into the couch and crossing his arms. Soon after- the sound of the controller hitting the floor is heard and I glare at Deidara. He stares at me, unfazed then turns to the controller. He smiles evilly, "Talia- do me a favor, un." He tilts his head towards the controller on the ground, "Wanna get that for me, un?"
"No." He continues to stare expectantly at me until I cave. I get up and reach for the controller, not even surprised when I feel a hand grab my butt. And by now- I don't think I can get any more pissed off. Have you ever been so pissed off that it seems like you do a 180? Yeah, I've reached that.
I let out a small sarcastic laugh and turn back to him, smiling as I say, "Yeah- good one. I have a game we can play actually. Are you interested?" Deidara shoots me a skeptical look and nods slowly. I sit back down with my body turned enough so that I face him, lightly placing my hand on his knee. "Okay here are the rules, I think of a color and don't tell you what it is. You have to guess the color I'm thinking of. And for every time you're wrong-" I inch my hand up his leg, "that happens."
Deidara smirks, "What if I don't want you to stop going, hnn."
I smile sweetly and say, "Well you could get felt up- yeah that is definitely what could happen. Or- you could get punched in the dick, it all depends on who you play the game with." Deidara doesn't disagree or show any signs of protest so I say, "I'm thinking of a color…"
"Red, un."
I inch further up his leg. "Nope."
"Purple, un."
My hand creeps forward. "Nice try."
"How do I know you wont lie, hn?"
I stare innocently up at him, "Now why would I do that?"
"Pink!"
And my hand continues further, "What a disgusting color."
"Teal…" he says, sounding a bit more timid.
My hand is now dangerously close, "Swing and a miss." I chuckle darkly, "One more try hot shot- bet you're just dieing to see what one I'll pick."
Deidara opens his mouth to say another color when someone interrupts him, "Get a room!" I yelp and jolt forward, now half sitting in Deidara's lap.
"The fuck Sora!"
-Normal POV-
"Oh sorry, did I mess up your mojo?" Sora asks, a smirk playing on her lips, "Too bad bitches."
"We weren't doing shit like that, we were playing the color game!" Talia shouts, a blush running across her nose.
"Riiight- sure you were. You just wanted to grab all up on his junk." Sora mocks, plopping down on the couch she had sat on earlier. She uses the remote to change the setting back to TV- looks like Deidara's game will have to wait.
"I was not grabbing I was punching, Punching!" Talia shouts.
"That's a form of rudeness, un." Deidara chimes in.
"You people bore me, entertain me!" Sora cheers, "Act out a scene from Fable or something."
"Sex?" Deidara almost squeaks, perking up.
"No," Talia growls out through gritted teeth, "How about we infiltrate the thief hide out!"
"Oooh, who will the bandits be?" Sora sings in a sickly sweet way, knowing full well who Talia had in mind.
"Well I'll give you some clues, he's blond, blue eyes, tall and-"
"Extremely sexy, whom you want to fuck more than anyone else ever, un."
Talia growls and narrows her eyes on him, "I hate blonds…"
"That was rude un…"
"Well technically she's stating a broad opinion, not just directed towards you." Sora points out. Deidara rolls his eyes and Talia smiles triumphantly at her friend's statement.
"Exactly!" Talia agrees.
"Act now do it!" Sora shouts.
"And your just going to sit there, un?" Deidara groans, "That hardly seems fair, hm."
"No I'm going to make a fort out of couch cushions," Sora says, she then stands and rips the cushions off for good measure, "Do we have any blankets?"
"I want to make a fort, un!" Deidara whines.
"Then get me some blankets you blonde bastard!"
The blonde leaves the room in search of blankets. Talia lets a sigh escape her mouth and immediately glomps her friend.
"You are my savior." Talia groans, "Do you know how hard it is to be fucking nice to him."
"Harder than he is when he looks at you?" Sora arches her eyebrows in a sly look.
Talia chuckles, "I dunno, I am pretty hot so that must be pretty hard." Talia pauses and there is a momentary silence before she asks, "Wait does he really?"
"Pfft, probably. Haven't you noticed he's always staring at you?" Sora grins, "He twitches and shifts a lot too, especially when sitting so close to you."
Talia waves the thought off dismissively, "Nahh- he has to have some control." Sora eyes her with a knowing yet mischievous gaze, flustering Talia. "Uhg, so gross. Whatever, lets leave so we can ditch him.."
"Wandering!" Sora hops to her feet and grins. "Sick shit, lets do it!" Talia smiles lightly as the two turn into the hallway.
The silence that surrounds them is, at first, a welcome change to the buzz of the afternoon. Neither girl has anything to say, nothing that would provide a consistent conversation at least. It almost surprises them at the lack of random encounters with any of the other members.
Then the silence takes a turn for the worse as their minds start to wander. Though each is oblivious to the other's thoughts, they drift to similar and dark places.
Thoughts of her mother distraught over her being missing are the first worries to plague Talia's mind. Is she getting any sleep? She's a stubborn one so she's probably out searching. Talia's brow furrows, her mother may not be fragile but she isn't as strong as she had been. What if her body can't handle the stress? What if she gets sick because of it, because of me?
Talia chokes back a whimper, covering the sound with a cough as she turns away. With a sigh she runs her fingers through her bangs, smoothing them back only for them to fall back into place again.
What about my other friends, Talia ponders, are they worried too? They must be. Oh God, Talia's eyes widen, what if they think I'm dead! No, Talia stop it, she scolds herself, don't go there! Don't do that! You're going to end up crying and you can not, can not- do that to Sora. Talia continues to mentally chastise herself, Sora is probably stressing so much right now how can you be so selfish and only worry about yourself and your family!
While Talia's emotions and thoughts switch between anger and worry Sora's mental state is in no better shape. Luckily for Talia, or rather unlucky for Sora, the other female is in deep thought of her own.
Her Godsend, her closest confidant next to Talia, her mother, her poor mother having not only to deal with her horrible anger filled brother but now with herself missing. What would she do? What would she be thinking of her? Would she wonder if she was dead, raped in a bin somewhere and tossed aside like a used napkin? Would she feel the need to go out searching for her, making forlorn speeches over the television about what a shining star Sora is? Would she beg for her baby to come home? Would She be off searching with Talia's mother? Begging for her baby, her precious daughter, her only daughter.
And what about her dad? What would he be doing? Probably drinking away his sorrows. Or worse, he'd probably be running around with his hunting supplies in the back of his truck and drive around pulling anyone suspicious off the streets and beating them up. Maybe he'd confront her creepy neighbor, or her ex boyfriend. Or maybe since Talia was missing as well, he would think she abandoned the family, abandoned her mother, and brother, and him.
The only good thing about the situation was her brother wouldn't give a shit. He'd probably demand her stuff thrown out and beg to get her room. No one would be concerned that Sora was missing when her poor anger filled brother deserved everything in the world. Her dad would drink his sorrows away, Her mother would cry herself to sleep at night and slowly her marriage would unravel, and her brother would remain a selfish prick. Or hell maybe the boy would start to realize how much his big sister really did love him and cry for her at night.
She feels a sting of tears begin to fog her vision but she quickly pushes the feeling down. No, not in front of Talia, she did not need to see her crying like a pathetic baby. Talia was strong, she didn't need to comfort Sora, she should be able to bear it alone.
Sora heaves a shaky sigh and opens her mouth but Talia beats her to it, "I'm gunna go, okay pretty lady?" Talia's voice is shaky and Sora looks to her friend with a worried stare. Talia doesn't wait for a response, instead she speeds up her pace and turns down the next hall, silently praying Sora doesn't follow. Sora silently thanks Talia, and although she still worries for her friend, she doesn't follow. Instead, Sora turns on her heel to head towards the cave entrance.
~Talia's POV~ With a resounding slam I shut my door behind myself, eyes cloudy with tears. I bite my lip to silence the whimpers and keep the tears from falling, I will not cry. Sora can always tell when I cry.
With a groan I slump against my door and slide down to the cold floor, tangling my fingers in my hair. Mom is worried, she's probably turned the whole state upside down looking for me, hell my little brother is probably even helping! I even miss him! I miss my mom…I miss her so much..
A pang of guilt pierces my heart, it's almost like an actual blade. I'm causing them so much grief and hardship…If they even care that is..
No, of course they do! God how I miss them, I miss my mother so much. I miss it all, the smiles and laughter of my friends, the warm feeling of being around them. I wonder how they are doing, if they are happy. Do they notice that I am gone, or how long I've actually been missing? Months right? How many months have I been gone? Three I think, oh wow, that's so long… Oh God I hope my mom doesn't blame Sora for us going missing. For the love of- hell- I hope her mother doesn't blame me! They probably think we ran away, that I corrupted Sora into abandoning her family.
I can't even be there to help my mom out with the house anymore, fuck- what is she going to do! I help pay for things! She might get kicked out of the house! No! God damn me what the fuck is wrong with me! Here I am laughing it up with criminals without any real life problems, while my mother struggles to pay for the house, food, and everything else! How selfish can I be! I can't keep living in this fantasy world, it needs to end and I need to get home!
"God damn it Talia!" I scream, slamming my fist on the floor. "Why can't you ever do anything right!" With a ragged sigh I push myself up and walk over to my bed. It creaks obnoxiously under my weight as I crawl to the head of the bed, grabbing the biggest pillow I can find and wrapping my arms around it. I hug the cold pillow to my body and gently press my face into it as I sob. As images of what could be start to worsen I draw my legs closer and grip the pillow tighter for any sense of comfort I can find.
With one arm I hold the pillow as I pull away from it to rub my eyes with my free hand. I choke back another whimper and bite my lip to stifle any other sounds that could escape.
"Stop crying you idiot you have no reason to cry.." I scold aloud. I bite down harder but it isn't enough to stop the new wave of tears and cries. Fresh tears spill over and streak my cheeks with black eyeliner and mascara. The eyeliner that isn't running down my face in gray cloudy tears covers the palm of my right hand, serving as a reminder that I have raccoon ring eyes right now. In frustration I toss my head back, immediately regretting it when I hit the headboard hard, letting out a yelp and holding my head. With a silent whimper I curl closer in on myself, the pillow practically flat against my body, tears dampening its surface.
A light knocking sounds and my attention is brought to my door. With the best normal voice I can conjure up I ask, "What do you want?" My attempt to sound bothered only sounds shaky and broken. Oh how I hate when I cry. I cough and clear my throat and repeat my question, "What do you want?" My voice holds a slight authority now, more myself.
"Talia are you okay, un?"
"Deidara? Go away Deidara." I attempt to glare at him through the door.
"Talia I heard a loud noise from your room are you breaking things in there, un? Like my stuff?"
"Leave me alone Deidara!" My voice cracks and I cough, trying to cover the shakiness of my voice.
"Are you crying, hm?" Deidara asks. Without a moments hesitation the door swings open and he's in my room and just as quickly he is at my side, the door closed behind him. "Is it cause of our bet? I didn't mean to-"
"No!" I cut him off, turning away and burying my face in the pillow. I can't let him see me like this, no one can see. "Just go away!"
"Talia you don't just cry for no reason, the last time I saw you in tears was the first time I met you and that was because you thought Sora was going to die, un!" Deidara almost sounds concerned. If I didn't know any better I'd think he actually cared…
"Fuck off blondy leave me alone I'm fine I don't need to tell anyone anything. Piss off!" My yells are muffled in the pillow but they can be heard clearly. I feel the bed sink down beside me and the creaking of the springs yielding to his weight, I inch away. A warm hand presses against my shoulder.
"Talia just tell me what's bugging you, un." His hand slowly travels down my arm and he grips my wrist. Gently he tugs my arm to pull it away from my face, I jerk out of his grip and remain staring at the wall and away from him. "God damn, for fucks sake Talia why are you always so stubborn! I'm trying to help you out now will you just talk to me, un!"
My gaze snaps towards him with glaring eyes, "Don't you fucking dare yell at me! You don't care and it isn't your problem! I can handle it myself!"
His stare hardens and he firmly says, "Fine, if I can't get through to you maybe Sora can, un." He is barley standing before both of my hands are grasping his own.
With fresh tears clouding my eyes I stare up at him and plead, "Please don't say anything to Sora, I don't want her to worry about me." I sniffle as I choke out the rest of what I have to say, "I don't want to burden her.."
Silence soon follows. Deidara is just standing here, staring down at my tearstained face. My hands tighten around his and I yank on his arm, bringing him back to his seated position on my bed.
"Are you going to tell me what's wrong now, un..?" He questions in a gentler tone.
"Are you going to tell Sora..?" He shakes his head slowly. With a sigh I say, "Fine… I just, I'm worried about home, my mum and my friends. I feel like while I'm living it up here they are suffering and it's my fault!" I choke out the last part before sobbing again. He rubs my back soothingly and rests his chin on the top of my head. His methods of calming me surprisingly work well enough that I can form coherent speech once again. "I just…I just feel like I've made life harder for everyone I care about and I'm not trying hard enough to fix it." I wipe tears away, smearing my makeup even more so, not that it even matters anymore. "I can never do anything right.." "Tch, you know, when you think about this later you're going to laugh, un." Deidara flashes a half smile and I look up at him in confusion. "You're being silly, un." "I'd like to know how the fuck any of this is silly!" He holds my shoulder with his left hand and brushes my bangs out of my face with the other. "Talia, you're beating yourself up for nothing, un."
"You have no idea how wrong you fucking are!" I snap. "My family actually needs me! I help pay for the house and food and electricity and everything! For fuck sake they might be out on the street when I get back for all I know! They could be in some shitty dump of an apartment and on top of that they have no idea where I am! My mom probably thinks I've just fucking left! That or I'm dead! They're suffering through some bullshit they shouldn't have to deal with because of me! Because I can't get my ass in gear and GO HOME!"
"Either way it doesn't matter! You're here for a year anyway so no matter how fast or slow we find a way to send you back it's still going to take a year, un!"
"Of fucking course! I know that already! But having already have found a way home would make the rest of our stay so much easier! I can't stand the thought of my family, especially my mother, having to live a shit life because of me!" I push his hand away and another whimper finds its way out.
"Talia-"
"You know," I say, my voice much lower and quieter, "you really suck at this whole helping thing."
"Well Talia you keep saying how you don't think you can do anything and your useless, that's all crap, un. You do realize that you've already risked your life right? Getting a scroll that might help us send you home, un? Or do you not remember?"
"So?"
"You're trying and you're doing what you can, un. Don't make it sound like all you're doing is sitting around all day without even trying, hm. Things like this take time and we have a year to kill, un."
"What if it takes longer- what if-"
"Talia stop it, un!" He firmly grips both my shoulders and stares me in the eyes with the most serious look I've ever seen on him. "You and Sora are doing what you can just like the rest of us, and you will both deal with that if it comes to that but when it happens, un. Stressing yourself out about it now will not help, hn."
"But I-"
"You are doing what you can, and that's final, un. Just remember, when you get back they will be happy to know you're okay, un."
All I can do is stare at him in silence. Everything he says is slow to sink in and my brain can't seem to comprehend that this is Deidara saying all of it. Deidara, who's usual behavior and general presence disturbs me beyond belief, is consoling me. Maybe he got sick…
"I'll tell ya this though, it's gunna suck when you're gone, un. It'll go back to boring normal, hm." Deidara flashes a sad smile and starts getting up, I once again hold him back. "Do you want me to stay?"
I nod my head and pull him closer so that he is leaning against the headboard just as I had been. Without a single word I position myself with my head resting on his shoulder and his arm around me with both my arms wrapped around him. This is just as Sora would allow me to use her as a pillow whenever I cried near her, and vice versa. Might as well make the best of what I have right?
Once I am comfortable I say with my still hoarse voice, "Speak of this to anyone and you die."
Deidara merely chuckles at this and says, "Fine, they wouldn't even be able to torture it out of me, un."
"Good" I mumble. A long pause follows before Deidara says, "Oh and by the way, I think this counts as me 'owing you one', un."
I process this in my head for a moment before remembering what he was talking about. With a small growl I say, "Go fuck yourself Deidara.." and snuggle back into the warmth of his side. I smile as he laughs, knowing that by tomorrow all of this will be forgotten about and we will once again be at each others throats. Of course Deidara would probably say a comment on that and turn it sexual, Sora would threaten him, as would I. Things will be just as they should be, so I have something to look forward to.
Except…I kinda like this.
Sora's POV
I walk down the hall, digging my finger nails into the top of my other hand. Outside, nature, safe, I keep repeating in my head, outside, nature, safe. Then I can let loose, I can release the pressure in my eyes. I hate crying, hate the pain, the pressure, the annoying itch that comes from the salty tears streaking down my eyes. I kick off the shoes on my feet and step outside, its drizzling out, large dark clouds clashing together in the sky. I fall against the rocky exterior of the base and follow it out into the woods. The river is off in the distance, narrower than the location we usually practice in. I fall against a tree that is close to the moving water and pull my knees close to my chest feeling the first wave of shivers begin to wrack up my body. I hate when I cry, I always whimper and shake. My pitches go to the sound of dolphins using sonar and I have to hold myself to stop from moving.
I miss my mother. God I miss her so much there is so much I have to tell her. First I haven't told her I love her since she left to go to that thing in the city with my Dad and Brother. They always go to the City for my brothers Anger Management courses and I always stay behind, content with avoiding the mess that would ensue. I didn't trust therapists, more so the therapists from the City. She had wanted me to go with her this time, to connect with the family but I insisted, pouted, and cried to have Talia over to have a marathon. And now she will probably think its because I wanted to run away from her. I even forgot to say I loved her when I went to go pick up Talia. Stupid me, I'm such a horrible person, I can't even remember to tell my mom I love her and to be safe. What if she never made it home? OH God what if I get back home to an empty house and discover my mother, my poor mother had died in a car accident with the rest of my family in the City?
I'm hysterical at this point, sputtering and hyperventilating like a freak show. The rain is beginning to pick up as well as the wind. The chill calms me down, forces my body to push in on itself more, stopping the shaking for the most part. I watch the water ripple and jump in the wind, its relaxing, my deep breathing stops and my mind is calm for a bit.
Mother is fine, probably concerned about where I am. She probably thinks I'm at an extended sleepover at Talia's or maybe a trip. I used to joke about going with Talia on a long vacation, stealing the car and going to some place like New Orleans, or California. Or if Talia was there she would shout North Dakota, bringing up unwanted bad dreams. That's it, mother just thinks I'm on vacation, now calm down. She loves you, and knows you will be safe. As long as she doesn't go into your room, and realize none of your stuff is missing. As long as she doesn't notice your cell phone is still in the kitchen charging, or that you left your MP3 player and your purse. As long as she doesn't notice the obvious. My crying is back full force and I have to bury my face in my knees. My knuckles begin to rub against each other. Then I move my left hand to dig into my foot and my right hand to dig at my neck. I wish I had her necklace. The necklace my mother made me, the necklace I always wore. It was simple, a leather cord with a diamond shaped piece of glass of green and blue. On the front a little Kanji and on the back the meaning, dream. My mother always called me her little dreamer, since I could get lost in my own thoughts so easily. My nails dig deeper into my neck, I want my necklace.
"Sora?" a quiet voice calls to me.
I freeze and bury my face back into my knees, hiding my puffy eyes. I always look so ugly after I cry. The footsteps get closer and I know from the quiet low tone of the voice that its Itachi. His footsteps stop beside me, but I pay him no attention, don't acknowledge his existence, maybe he'll go away. Leave me to wallow in my self pity. I'd be fine as long as Talia didn't see me like this. She doesn't need my pathetic worries and tears on her mind, she has enough to worry about herself. I feel the warm material of a cloak fall over my back, then a gentle hand laid on top, moving in small circular motions on my back.
"Sora, what is wrong?" Itachi asks, I peak threw my hair to see his is looking away from me.
"Nothing," I whimper, cursing how weak my voice is.
"It obviously isn't nothing, or else you wouldn't be outside crying without shoes on by yourself." He sighs and I watch as he looks at me, finding my gaze through my hair, "What's wrong?"
"Its nothing, just silly girl crap," I insist, "Just please go away."
"I can go get Talia if-"
"No!" I cry sitting up, he seems taken aback, "I'm fine just don't go bugging Talia ok."
"Are you two in a fight?"
"No I'm fine." I groan, rubbing at my eyes.
"You've been crying, heavily. I waited twenty minutes before finally coming to talk to you."
"Its nothing-"
"It obviously isn't."
"But it is, its nothing that concerns you its just nothing but my own fucking mind coming up with horrible scenarios like it always does!" I cry out, "So its nothing."
"Why don't you want Talia to know then?"
"She doesn't need me crying all over her, she has enough on her mind she doesn't need my crazy fucked up thoughts messing with her mojo."
"Then what about me?"
"Pardon?" I ask, looking up at him slightly confused.
"Will your thoughts mess with my mojo?" He asks, looking at me with curiosity.
"No but I might make you go outsane,"
"I think I can handle it."
"I'm emotionally unbalanced, and my crazy thought process doesn't help. Sometimes it's a curse having so much going on up in my brain that I start to think of the most fucked up things and then it's a slippery slope from there." I whimper and wipe at my eyes, "I keep thinking about home."
I look up at him but he simply nods for me to continue.
"My mind keeps thinking horrible fucked up thoughts like.. What if I get home after all of this and my family has died in a fucking car accident leaving me an orphan to fend for myself in a situation where I don't have a lot of rich relatives to depend on. And what if everyone thinks I'm dead too or worse that I murdered them for a stupid reason and I have to spend the rest of my life on the run for something I didn't do."
I sit in the silence letting the scenario sink into my head when a realize. I open my eyes wide and look up at Itachi to see him staring off into the distance. I bite at my lip, god I'm so fucking stupid, I had to pick that scenario.
"I'm Sorry," I mumble.
"For?"
"You know."
"I don't actually, please elaborate."
"For possibly bringing up unwanted memories of your past, I apologize my brain is just… I'm just fucked in the head." I moan, beginning to cry again.
"Sora," he sighs, placing his hand onto my cheek and making me look at him, "You didn't do anything wrong, we are talking about why you are upset. As for me I am not upset and crying hysterically so please stop worrying and lets move the focus back onto you. Now you miss your family?"
"Yes."
"And you are worried about them, correct?"
"Understatement of the year."
"Then you should calm down."
"But-" he gestures for me to be quiet.
"Its perfectly rational to be worried, you don't know what's going on there and I'm sure they are worried about you but you have to keep moving forward."
"But-"
"You can't let this worry take over your life, you still have a long time to go here and if you hold onto that worry it will only be your downfall in the end. So for now lets try not to worry about the future, but there here and now."
"I guess."
He nods and wipes the tears out of my eyes with his hand. The rain has come to a stop by now, the water calming, and the wind barely even passing through the trees. He takes his hand back from my face and I rest my chin on the top of my knees. My ears hurt and burn. I keep clawing at my chest but I can't help it, I still miss my mother.
"What are you doing?" I turn and look at Itachi questioningly, "What are you doing?" he asks again, taking my hand away from my chest.
"Oh that, nervous habit I guess," I sigh, "I usually wear this necklace my mother made me, but I left it back home, so I have nothing to fiddle with."
"I see," he says.
Quietly the clouds open up to reveal a starry sky, its become so dark, how long have I been outside? Even though I am freezing, and soaked to the bone I don't want to move. The sky is just so lovely, the stars sparkling, bringing a calmness to my soul that only nature can provide. I feel the hand on my back move up to my shoulder and Itachi pull me into his side. Its much warmer than his cloak. I let my head fall into the crook of his neck and smile as the moon slowly rises in the sky. Even though I know its probably nothing, for a moment I pretend, lying against him under the stars, that this is something truly meaningful and not just a passing moment in my time here.
