A/N: Hey guys :) So after the last authors note, most of you told me not to redo chapter 9..

But it was bugging me so much..

Not because some people didn't like it, it was more the fact that it made the situation seem unrealistic, to the point where I didn't even like it. Which is saying something, because I wrote it :)

It took me a while to decide whether to redo it or not, but I can be quite a perfectionist at times, and Chapter 9 was making me unhappy :(

Don't get me wrong, I love the Nate/Jason bickering and light hearted humour, just as you do, but it made that chapter seem too unrealistic.

I feel like I could've done it better, and I feel like I kind of let you guys down, and let my self down a bit too. So I'm sorry about that :)

So, I've decided to redo it. I've made it so it's a bit more serious and realistic, and I've slightly changed it up a bit. Hope you enjoy :)


"Uncle Brown!" Shane shouted loudly, recognising the figure in the distance.

He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank God," he murmured, staring at the fragile body in his arms.

"It's going to be OK, Mitchie," Shane whispered.

His eyes scanned her face for any reaction; yet she remained just as pale and lifeless as she had been earlier.

His brow furrowed, and he tightened his grip on her protectively.

"Shane!" Someone yelled loudly.

He looked up, remembering where he was, and managed a weak smile as his Uncle rushed over to him, followed closely by Connie, Peggy and Ella.

Relief was evident on all of their faces, but it was wiped clean when they noticed Mitchie lying unconscious in Shane's arms.

Connie froze.

"Oh my God," she whispered, taking in her daughter's motionless form with disbelieving eyes. "Mitchie!"

Her eyes shone with tears as she gazed up at Shane.

"What happened?"

"I found her like this," Shane replied tensely. "Her breathing's getting really bad. Caitlyn said she has asthma?"

Connie sucked in a breath.

She nodded brokenly, her eye's creased with fear.

"It's never been this bad before," She murmured softly, a tear running down her cheek. "Her inhaler. I should've thought... But I... I didn't expec-"

"We need to get her to a hospital," Brown interrupted solemnly. He drew his eye's away from Mitchie for a moment to look at the group that was now gathered around.

"Peggy," He instructed, gesturing to the girl with long dark hair. "Run back to camp, and get Dee to phone an ambulance."

Peggy's eyes widened, but she nodded and disappeared into the tree's.

"We need to get Mitchie back as quickly as possible," Brown continued.

He turned to his nephew. "How long has she been like this?"

"She was like this when I found her. I don't know for how long. It could've been hours. I- I dunno.."

Everyone was silent.

"How far is Camp?" Ella asked gravely.

"It's not far," Connie answered, brushing the tears from her face. Seeing Mitchie in such a state made her heart threaten to stop beating. She didn't know if she could stand it if this was the last time she would get to see her daughter alive.

Don't think about that Connie. It's not going to happen.

She tried to reassure herself, but a sense of doubt still lingered, threatening, at the back of her mind.

As the group hurried back to camp, with Mitchie clasped tightly in Shane's arms, the sun began to sink lower into the sky.

Dusk was approaching.

And time was running out.


Frightened tears raced down Tess's cheeks, and she made no attempt to brush them away. She was terrified.

Her legs had no feeling in them, and her spine felt as though a thousand knives were piercing into it, unrelenting with their fury.

This was karma.

Tess couldn't stand it any longer. She opened her mouth and screamed; screamed like she'd never screamed before.

It was a scream of pure terror, enough to send chills down anyone's spine.

The sound echoed for an eternity, reverberating through the valley like thunder.


Caitlyn covered her ears to block out the piercing scream.

When it finally ended, she limped to the cliff side, apprehensive of what she was about to see. Jason and Nate were already there, looking down.

The figure sprawled on the ground far below them was shaking with sobs.

Caitlyn and Nate looked grimly at each other.

Tess was alive.


The sirens wailed loudly, red lights flashing.

The ambulance jerked to a stop in the Camp Rock driveway.

Brown rushed frantically towards it just as a man and woman leapt out.

"Thank God!" He cried. "You've got to help! She's getting worse! Her breathing.. She can't breathe!"

The ambulance workers reacted swiftly.

"Where is she?"

Brown was in such a state that he couldn't answer. This was something he had never experienced in his whole history at Camp Rock. A camper was dying before his very eye's, and there was nothing he could do.

"Sir," The women said seriously. "We're going to need you to calm down and tell us where she is."

Brown took a gulp of air and pointed hysterically towards the nearest cabin.

The ambulancers workers nodded briefly and raced up the cabin steps.


Shane heard the loud sirens wailing and his heart clenched.

Mitchie was getting worse.

Her face was turning blue, and her breaths were now coming out in short frenzied gasps.

Shane squeezed her hand tightly, trying not to cry.

"Come on, Mitchie," he whispered in a strangled voice. "You can't give up on us."

Connie was in a hysterical state. She was pleading for her daughter to wake up, tears rolling freely down her cheeks.

This couldn't be the end.

Just then, a man and woman rushed into the cabin, wearing official uniforms and with medical equipment in hands.

One look at Mitchie told them that the situation was grave.

"I'll get the stretcher," The man said solemnly from the doorway, as the woman knelt beside Mitchie.

The woman gave a brief nod. She was focused entirely on her work.

She carefully lifted Mitchie's head up, and strapped an oxygen mask to her face to help her to breathe.

"How long has she been like this?" She asked swiftly.

Connie sobbed into her hands, too distraught to answer.

"She just started getting worse a few minutes ago," Shane said, his voice tense with worry. "But she's been unconscious for hours."

The womans face turned grim.

"You should've called us earlier. We'll need to get her to the hospital immediately," She informed them.

The male officer returned, and carefully loaded Mitchie onto the stretcher.

Shane watched them go.

Mitchie's face was contorted with agony, and beads of sweat were forming on her forehead.

All her energy was concentrated on staying alive.

Shane leapt to his feet.

His heart was thumping fiercely in his chest.

"Come on, Shane," Brown said from the doorway. "We'll take my car."

Shane nodded quickly, and followed his Uncle out the door.

The ambulance was just disappearing around a bend in the driveway, sirens wailing urgently.

Shane felt his stomach clench in dread.

He had a bad feeling about all this.


A/N: So it's a bit different. A bit less humourous, a bit more dramatic. :)

On a brighter note, I finished my first exam today (English) and it went quite well, I thought! Lol but I couldn't stop thinking about this story in it, I'm getting a few ideas for what's going to happen next. More drama, I promise you!

I'm really sorry about changing this chapter, but I'm a lot happier with it now, which is good.

What did you think?

Was it realistic?

Did you like it?

Please let me know. Your reviews make me HAPPY! XD

So if you feel like lifting my spirits, click on that little review button down at the bottom of the page and tell me what you thought!

Or if you've done that already, please go on to my page and send me a PM.

It would be much appreciated :)

Sorry if I sound a bit dreary, I blame it on exams! :D

Hugs,

Kacee