A.N.: Thank you for your comments and your support. It means a lot to me to feel reassured. I know you're impatient. Getting there!

Chapter 9

She was dressed in black just with the little black dress that all women in the occidental world kept on their "must have" wardrobe. In other ones usually it looked dull, but in Kensi it was simply awesome. She was combing her hair without taking her eyes out of Deeks thinking about how lucky she was to have him in her life.

- "You look gorgeous" – said Kensi.

- "You and your thing with uniforms… I look ridiculous"- answered Deeks who was in front of the bedroom mirror still struggling with the tie of his L.A.P.D. blue uniform.

- "No, you don't. Think about what represents this uniform "To protect and serve", and that's what you do, you must be proud of wearing it."- She affirmed while expertly tied his tie from behind his shoulders; then pinching him in the butt she added – "and yes, I have a thing with uniforms."

They were at home getting ready for Michelle's burial after a very and unusually calm day. They both overslept in the morning even if neither of them had much faith in getting a night free of nightmares after the terrible past days. In fact it was Hetty's call what woke them up with the announcement of the service that same afternoon:

- "Huuuumm…who was it?" – asked Kensi still asleepy.

- "Hetty…"- said Deeks once he let his phone at the nightstand.

Kensi jumped out of the bed ready to get dress in seconds.

- "What's wrong? Sam? the kids?"- she asked again fearing the worst.

- "Wow! No, nothing is wrong, well not worse that yesterday, anyway! Come here!"- called Deeks – "she just wanted us to know that they are burying Michelle today."

- "That was quick."- Kensi came back to the bed and looked Deeks in the eyes.

- "I guess Sam needs closure as soon as possible, but yes, giving the circumstances that was quick." –he said pensive.

- "And…"

- "And what?"

- "I don't know, Deeks, but every time you make that face it means that is something else."- she laid on Deeks' chest. He welcomed her and started to play with her hair.

- "What face? Are you "physioanalyzing" me?"

- "Deeks!"

- "It's nothing, really, just an impression. Hetty, she sounded… I don't know…kinda old?"

- "She must be exhausted if she had managed everything. I don't know how she can do that." – she paused and added in a soft voice –"By the way, I want to thank you for last night. I…I…"

- "You have nothing to thank me, Kensilina, it's me who want to thank you for that beautiful ring….argggg, ha, ha, ha, don't, no tickles, no tickles! Keeeeens!"

That had been the beginning of an incredible day together just enjoying their mutual company and letting all the problems out of their pink cloud, their bubble of love. They were so happy that they felt guilty.

Now, still in front of the mirror with the tie impeccably tied, Deeks put the grenade ring in the front pocket of his uniform, just at the height of his heart.

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Hetty adjusted the silk scarf on the neck of her blouse and put some perfume on. Life seemed always better with a French perfume. She was tired, it was true that she didn't got too much sleep lately, but she was tired of losing the loved ones, she was tired of feeling responsible, she was tired of her gut telling her that problems weren't over, she was tired of the evil wining another set at nearly the end of her match. She knew that probably she would pass the next weeks in Washington discussing nonsense as her team, her family, needed her. The issue was that they needed her strong and she wasn't feeling that way.

She asked Alfred to prepare the car. Today she was too tired to drive.

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Eric's phone rang. Again. And he answered the same thing. Again.

- "Why you don't just turn it off Eric?"- asked Nell losing her patience.

- "I can't do that. And even if I do they will be calling you, so …"

- "At this rate you're not going to get out of the fitting room in a week! I really need to go home before the service."

- "I know, I know. It was Sam asking for Callen. Again."

He moved aside the curtain and stepped outside.

- "What do you think?"- asked Eric feeling uncomfortable with the navy blue suit and the serious shirt.

Nell thought that he was the more handsome, intelligent and best man she could ever dream for, and that he was looking great in a suit even wearing flip flops.

- "This one would do it. Let's go!"

The phone rang. Again.

- "Hello Kens."

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Sam was alone in the room he shared all these years with Michelle, getting ready for the moment he never thought he would need to be ready ever. The room seemed huge and even if everything was clean and in perfect order he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep there again. Not without her.

He dressed slowly taking his time as he like to do each time he put his livery on. Each one of the stripes and decorations were supported by years of hard work and service. Now he knew that all his training and expertise meant nothing and that feeling scared him more than he would recognize.

He was proud of their son and daughter they were the bravest and more supportive kids in the world and they are proving to be ready to fly out of the nest. Aiden was a nearly a man, strong, bold, responsible and caring, in one month he will be eighteen and next year he'll be probably deciding between West Point and Yale. And Kamran, his little princess wasn't a princess anymore. She was like her mother, independent, tenacious, intelligent and sweet. He conditioned his life to them, to his family; he renounced to be an active SEAL in order to spend more time with them. He didn't regret that decision, but now that his family was about to vanish he didn't know how to be alone because he had never been.

- "Dadyyyyy!" – called Kamran from the living room – "We are readyyyyy!"

Sam wasn't.