WASSAT?!?!?! IT'S REJOINED THE LIVING AFTER ALMOST A YEAR! Seriously, inspiration suddenly hit me like a bus! Read on!


Chapter 9: Of Misadventures at the Mall PART 2

The girls looked around franticly.

"Shit where is he?" Jackie asked aloud. KT finally spotted him.

"NOOOOOOOO! We were almost home free!" she cried dramatically as she fell onto her knees for good measure. All the guys looked over to him. More screaming near Sephiroth's general area.

"What the hell?" Reno asked with a peculiar look. Megan decided to add to the theatrics.

"FANGIRLS….AND WHAT LOOKS TO BE A FANBOY!" she cried. Yes indeed. Sephiroth was dealing with the worst kind of enemy…rabid fangirls. And in this case a few rabid fanboys.

"What do we do?" Jackie asked as she watched a girl pull on Sephy's hair.

"Run for the hills?" Megan suggested.

"Just stop talking." KT replied with a scowl. Megan took offence.

"I was only suggesting. No need to get snarky." She said.

"We need like a distraction or something." Jackie said.

"I say we just go in there and beat them down." Megan said. She was not kidding this time.

"Well we need to think of something fast! We can't just leave him to fend for himself!" KT said as she racked her brain.

"Oh my god its that hot dude from whassat-game!" One pointed at Cloud.

"SQUEE! Its Cloud!" another screeched, taking notice of the others. Squee-ing is a sport I will have you know. Some more girls joined the fray and now barreled towards Cloud, who was stupidly waving at them. Megan thought quickly and ran in front of Cloud to block him.

"This is not Cloud! He's just a Cosplayer!" she yelled as she held out her hands. Megan began to panic when the rabid herd didn't show signs of slowing down.

"Megan really is an idiot. NO ONE can withstand rabid fangirls." KT said. This was proven when the front most fangirl pelted a shoebox at Megan. It hit her smack dab in the middle of the forehead and she crumpled to the ground.

"See! She's dead!" KT said. She lazily sorrow-ed for a second before brushing it off.

"RUN CLOUD RUN!" Jackie screamed. Ah yes…another shameless use of a quote (Forrest Gump).

"Why?" he asked as he was savagely glomped.

"We'll give you candy!" KT yelled. Cloud's eyes sparkled as he began to sprint around, fangirls trampling poor citizens to get to him.

"Can I have candy too?" Megan suddenly asked. She was standing safely next to Yazoo.

"Me-san? How on earth did you get out of that mess?" Jackie asked.

"Cloud kinda pushed me aside with his foot and then Yazoo pulled me out and here I am!" She explained, secretly thanking her lucky stars.

"RENO!"

"Great more of them!" Jackie complained.

"VINCENT!"

"Marco!" Megan yelled.

"Polo!" Kadaj suddenly yelled back as he ran from his own harassers.

"Guys! We need a plan!" KT yelled, bringing them back to attention.

"I seriously think we should just run for it!" Jackie said as they watched Sephiroth. Sephiroth was now swatting at the fruitloops with his man purse…that had magically appeared, compliments of the life stream.

"Awww I wanted to go to Tomodachi!" Megan whined, referring to the only anime merchandise store within a 50-mile radius of their houses.

"Maybe if we live to see another day." KT said.

"No seriously maybe we can hide in there." Megan said.

"Wait! I got a better idea! Lets offer Megan up for a sacrifice to appease the gods of fandoms everywhere!" Jackie said. Megan paled.

"I think our best bet is to hide in the carousel." KT said.

"I'm all for it but how do we get the guys on there. In case you havn't noticed, their trying to not contract STDs at the moment! And I still think the sacrifice idea is a winner!" Jackie said.

"Maybe we can announce a 90% off sale at Clairs or Hot Topic?" KT suggested.

"Sounds good." Megan chirped.

"I like to whisper too!" Cloud suddenly said, joining their huddle.

"Cloud? Where'd the loonies go?" KT asked. Cloud pointed behind them and the girls turned to look before they were all steamrolled by a rabid group of girls.

KT was the first to recover.

"Ok. Megan go to Claire's and tell them to announce a sale."

"What? Why me?"

"Didn't you say your cousin works there or something? I'm sure you can pull a few strings and get her to go along with it."

"But-!"

"Every second you waste, god kills a bishi!!" Jackie yelled as she pointed at Sephiroth, who just got his shirt ripped off. Megan thought for a minute, stomped her foot, and agreed.

"Fine. I'll think of the bishies!" She growled as she darted off towards Claires. As Megan finagled with her cousin, KT and Jackie just kinda shuffled their feet.

"Well…should we help them?" KT asked. Jackie shrugged.

"I donno. What could we do? We don't have the manpower. You wait here. I'll go get the tickets for the stupid carousel." She said as she sped off. KT nervously bounced on the balls of her feet as she waited for their plan to be set in motion. Jackie came back with the tickets and handed one to Sephiroth as he ran by. He snatched it and continued running. Megan ran back, out of breath.

"Did you get her to do it?"

"I had to give her the Abercrombie and Fitch gift card I never used but she's going to do it in about…" she explained as she looked at an invisible watch on her wrist, "5…4…3…2…1!"

"Attention shoppers, Claire's is having a 90 percent off sale for the next fifteen minutes only. I repeat 90 percent off for the next 15 minutes." The intercom suddenly stated. Some of the fan girls stopped running as their attention was snagged by bargains. They slowly broke off from the larger group and began to meander their way over to Claire's.

"Everybody go to Claire's! Fun and adventure await!" Jackie advertised as she motioned in the store's general direction.

"Remind your cousin that she totally rocks." KT sighed in relief as Sephiroth finally didn't have any followers and was able to return. Jackie quickly grabbed Yazoo by the arm and dragged him to the carousel where they waited in line nervously. The rest of the gang was still running around the mall like chickens with their heads cut off from the groupies. Where was mall security when you needed it?

Megan and KT meanwhile were trying to beat the fans away as best they could. KT however was having trouble as she had hit a goth fan and managed to punch a spike on the girl's necklace which resulted in her currently bleeding hand. Megan had managed to trip some of the Reno hunters and make it look like an accident.

Vincent wasn't running as fast as he could have. In fact I can safely say that he enjoyed the attention. But he did notice the rest of the group's distress and basically ran into Claire's, hoping to lose them amongst all the shiny and sparkly things. It was a success and he walked out positively beaming.

"Guys come on! It's our turn!" Jackie called as the dude took her and Yazoo's ticket. The passed through the gate and hung near the side as they watched L-Dog, Kadaj, Sephiroth, Reno, Vincent, Cloud, KT, and Megan bolt for the ticket booth. KT and Megan pretty much threw their tickets at the dude and hopped the fence, not bothering to wait in line. The guys followed their example as the dude somehow managed to block whatever fan girls had followed them. The group quickly hopped on some random animals.

Out of all of them, Cloud and Megan looked the most excited to be on it. Megan eagerly pretended she was the jockey of her Zebra while Cloud mimicked her on his Reindeer. Yazoo, L-Dog, and Vincent had decided to be boring and were simply sitting in those carriage thingies while the rest of the group were aboard animals of some kind.

"Alright what's the plan guys?" KT asked. "We have to be stealth like and get out of here." She adjusted herself on the brown cat so she could see the group. Jackie tapped her chin with her finger as she tried to think. However the up and down motion made it difficult along with the silly carnival music.

"How about we jump off and hop the fence when we're behind the large center post?" Sephiroth suggested. He looked positively stupid sitting on the elephant he had chosen. They were silent as they thought it over.

"I like it. Easy enough for those idiots" she motioned up to Cloud and Megan who were frequently switching animals, "to understand." The group quickly ran over the plan and then had to drag a kicking and screaming Cloud and Megan back to the rest of the group to explain it to them. Cloud put up quite a fuss about having to get off the carousel early but ultimately agreed.

"Ready guys?" Jackie asked as she dismounted her horse and walked to the edge of the carousel, the only thing preventing her from falling was the bar she had a tight grip on. The rest of the group quickly got in line next to her.

"Go!" KT said, as she made sure they were out of sight of the fan girls. They quickly stepped off and made sure to stay together as to not get spotted. One by one they hopped the fence until everyone was over.

"We all here?" Reno asked.

"No." Yazoo pointed out.

"Who are we missing?" Jackie asked.

"Two guesses." Kadaj said as he pointed back to the carousel. Cloud and Megan were still trying out all the different animals. KT made a sour face.

"I think Cloud is rubbing off on her." KT growled as she stomped up to the fence.

"Hey losers! We'd like to leave whenever you're ready." She called. Cloud saw her and waved.

"Come back later then. We're having fun." He smiled as he hopped on a rooster and prepared to go another revolution. Megan wasn't far behind and she was sitting on a dragon like thing.

"Megan…so help me god if I have to climb this fence and get you!" KT threatened. Megan pouted but climbed off the Dragon and quickly hopped off before being spotted by ride personnel. They had to wait for Cloud to come back around. Megan had to climb back on to forcibly drag him off the rabbit he was currently on. He pouted but jumped off and over the fence, followed by a suddenly serious Megan.

"Now lets blow this joint!" L-Dog said as he nodded his head to the far side of the carousel. Much to their dismay, they had been spotted and the straggling, die-hard fan girls were now running around the carousel to get to them.

"Run!" Reno cried as he took off. The rest of the group bolted and ran for the nearest exit.

They made it out of the mall in record time and ran to the cars. Megan who had regained possession of her keys from Loz, now chucked them at him. He caught them with ease and unlocked the car. Sephiroth did the same. Megan, Cloud, Kadaj, and Vincent quickly slid in before Loz locked the car doors. The others quickly slid into Jackie's small car and Sephiroth floored it in reverse before Jackie could fully close the door. L-Dog quickly followed and almost fish tailed as he tried to keep up with Sephiroth.

"Finally! We escaped those lunatics!" KT sighed with relief as she slumped against the seat.

"Yup. That was quite an adventure." Jackie agreed. She turned around to look out the rear window to make sure Loz was still following them. They most defiantly were and she could see that something very interesting was happening in the car. Loz looked very irritated as Cloud was reaching over the seat and smiling about something as he messed with Loz's hair. Vincent gazed at the scenery with a pleasant smile while Megan hunched over and held her face in her hands. Kadaj was reaching over her to try and pull Cloud back in his seat.

"Heh check it out! I'm glad I'm not in there." Jackie mused as she nudged KT and looked back at the insane car.

Sephiroth had just turned onto KT's street and Jackie and KT were both feeling relatively safer now that they were within feet of KT's house. However, that sense of security was quickly shattered when Sephiroth cursed and slammed on the breaks. But it wasn't quick enough and a loud clunk was heard as they plowed into something. The seatbelts restrained everyone except for KT who would have been hurled through the windshield if it hadn't been for Reno's arm that he had thrust across her out of instinct. She was a naughty girl and didn't wear her seatbelt.

Breaks squealed behind them and Sephiorth saw from the rearview mirror that Loz had to swerve sharply to avoid rear-ending them. They were all lucky that the road was not a busy one.

"What'd we go an' hit? Oh god is my baby ok?" Jackie screeched as she scrambled out the door and jogged to the front of her car. She quickly glanced at the front of her baby and saw that it was still dent free. She hugged the front of her car dramatically.

"What happened?" Kadaj wondered as he came over with the rest of the group in tow.

"Sweet mother of Abraham Lincoln look at that!" Megan pointed.

"Is that…?" KT wondered aloud. She would have laughed if the entire situation weren't so ridiculous. After all, if game characters could come to life, why couldn't Chocobos?

"It's a freakin Chocobo!" Jackie declared. It was large, yellow, and currently sprawled out on the side of the road while feathers that had managed to be shaken loose blew around.

"We hit a Chocobo in front of my house! Why? Why does my house attract all the freaks?" KT pouted. Cloud, who had disappeared for a moment before was now back and poking the large bird with a stick.

"Is it dead?" Reno asked as he raised a brow. The Chocobo's large eye suddenly flew open and let out a large squawk. It began to flail and tried to stand. KT jumped a bit and quickly backed away while Megan shrieked and hid behind Sephiroth. There was a tornado of feathers as the Big Bird wannabe finally made it to its feet and tried to run. It made it to the yard before it collapsed of what appeared to be a broken leg. There was probably some internal bleeding as well that contributed. The entire group watched in morbid fascination as the pterodactyl lay there pathetically, trying to catch its breath. It gave a few bleak cries before its entire chest stopped moving and the entire area was left in eerie silence.

"That sure put a damper on things." Vincent murmured. Cloud grabbed his stick again and hiked up the lawn to the beast. He poked it a few times before turning and shouting to the group.

"It's dead! Let's eat it!" the rest of the group approached it and formed a circle.

"What DO we do with it?" KT asked as she absentmindedly nudged the large tri-toed foot.

"Eat it!" Cloud smiled.

"Don't be crazy."

"Chocobos do hold a lot of nutritional value." Yazoo commented. The girls looked at him like he just kicked a puppy.

"Guys come on. We're not seriously considering eating a Chocobo are we?" KT laughed nervously, "Guys?"

"Waste not, want not." L-Dog said with a shrug.

"And how do you propose we go about doing this which I still say we're not?"

"I know a good lemon chicken recipe. Nice n' tangy. Or we could use sweet and sour sauce." Sephiroth volunteered.

"Do Chocobo's taste like chicken?" Megan asked.

"They're like the ultimate free range chicken!" Kadaj smirked. Don't let KFC's dude hear that. He'll come after it and we don't want that!

"Is this seriously…like…a regular practice back on Gaia?" KT asked, not believing that she was about to let this freak show continue. The guys all shrugged. KT wasn't sure how to take that.

"How are you gonna cook that thing?" Jackie asked. Sephiroth smirked and his face took on a look of almost pure evil.

"Just leave it to me."


Jeez...a year? Sorry guys! Provide me with any random ideas that you would like to see for this story. They'res a guy sleeping in class right now...he's snoring...its kinda funny.

It's been snowing out...i shouldnt be surprised. I love winter its just the freezingness that im not a fan of.

Thought one of them lapsed didn't ya?! HAHA FOOLED YOU!