A/N: Thank you most kindly for the reviews. And to two anon's, (1) Roonil Wazlib has got to be the best name ever. Hilarious. (2) Someone, I totally DID wonder if your brain had been fried by Finals. :)... FYI, before we get started, all the characters will have some development, but as the story is told solely through Sheldon's POV, they'll happen mainly in the background of the Shamy story. Please enjoy. :)
Chapter 9
"Wait a minute." Penny closed her eyes and held up a hand. "You mean to tell me that we've known each other for three years and you've never once mentioned you've been writing to a girl since you were seven?"
Sheldon blinked at her. "It was never relevant to the conversation."
Penny scoffed. "Never relevant?" She turned to Leonard. "When I asked you what Sheldon's deal was, it never occurred to you to mention that he's been writing letters to a girl for over twenty years?"
Leonard shrugged. "He claims it's platonic…and you know him. It was perfectly reasonable to assume he doesn't have feelings for someone he hasn't seen in twenty plus years."
"Twenty-three to be exact."
"Dt dt dt dt dt." Penny held up a finger to silence Sheldon, still looking at Leonard. "Um, no. If he is writing letters to a girl for twenty plus…"
"Twenty-three," Sheldon cut in.
"…for twenty-three years, especially if he hasn't seen her in twenty-three years, then it's reasonable to assume that he does have feelings for her."
"Excuse me," Sheldon started to say.
"Zzzt!" Penny gave Sheldon a look, indicating that he should remain silent.
Leonard scoffed. "Oh come on. We're talking about Sheldon here. Since when has he ever shown interest in the opposite sex."
Penny raised her eyebrows. "Um, since when has Sheldon been writing to a girl for twenty-three years? Of course he doesn't have any interest in the opposite sex. He only has interest in the girl he's known since childhood."
Sheldon cut in. "Would you two stop talking like I'm not here?"
"Quiet Sheldon," they both replied.
"Oh come on," Leonard said. "How can he have feelings for a girl he's never seen as an adult?"
Penny gave Leonard a look. "Are you saying that looks are the only thing that matter?"
Leonard scoffed. "You know that's not what I mean."
"How could I know that's not what you mean, when you just said that he can't have feelings for a girl he's never seen as an adult?"
"Would you two stop arguing?" Sheldon gestured vaguely with one hand. "Isn't the whole reason you two broke up so that you could stop arguing?"
"We're not arguing," they both replied.
Leonard turned to Sheldon. "And we broke up because I said I love you and Penny didn't love me back."
Penny narrowed her eyes. "You know that's not how it happened, Leonard."
"Pfft. Do I? Because last I checked, that's exactly what happened." Leonard narrowed his eyes back at Penny.
"Enough!" Sheldon exclaimed, balling his hands at his sides. Leonard and Penny both looked over at Sheldon, surprised. "I am trying to tell you something important, but as usual all the two of you can talk about is your failed relationship."
Leonard and Penny looked at each other sheepishly and then back at Sheldon. Penny put on a quick smile and patted Sheldon's arm. "We're sorry, Sweetie. You're right. This isn't about us."
"Yeah…sorry Sheldon."
Sheldon sighed. "Thank you." He cleared his throat. "As I was saying, I have had regular correspondence with Amy since the age of seven, and in her most recent letter, she stated that she will be moving to Pasadena within the next couple of weeks."
Penny cut Sheldon off. "Amy's moving to Pasadena?"
Sheldon rolled his eyes. "Yes. That's what I just said."
Penny grinned. "That's great news! You'll finally be able to meet her!...or…re-meet her. Oh!" She turned to Leonard and grabbed his arm. "What if Sheldon and Amy start dating? How cute would that be?"
Sheldon looked heavenward. "Dear lord…Penny." He looked over at her and sighed. "Amy and I are not going to start dating. We are merely friends."
Leonard raised his eyebrows. "Oh really? And what about those five years you supposedly pretended to be dating?"
Penny turned to Leonard with her mouth open. "Oh. I see. So, not only did you know that he was writing this Amy since he was seven, but you knew that they supposedly 'pretended' to be dating for five years, and you still didn't think he had feelings for her?"
Leonard rolled his eyes. "Well, yeah…when you put it like that…"
"I do not have feelings for Amy Farrah Fowler!" Sheldon exclaimed. "I don't even know what she looks like."
Penny rolled her eyes. "Sheldon. Don't tell me you agree with Leonard. So what if you don't know what she looks like? Would her looks affect how you feel about her?"
Sheldon sighed. "This conversation is becoming tedious." He looked between the two of them. "Can the two of you please focus long enough on the matter at hand? I'm trying to tell you something important and yet every time I start to speak I get interrupted."
Penny chuckled and patted Sheldon's arm again. (He hated when she did that.) "Sorry Sweetie. What else did you want to tell us?"
Sheldon cleared his throat again. "I was going to request your help in driving me around to find a suitable place of residence for Amy." He turned to Leonard. "Additionally, Amy will be arriving a day before her furniture, so I am taking this time to formally announce that we will be having a visitor staying with us."
Penny's mouth dropped open and Leonard frowned, looking confused. "Amy's going to be staying at our apartment?"
"Yes."
"Where is she sleeping?"
"In my bed."
Penny and Leonard both stared at Sheldon for a few moments. Penny spoke up first. "I'm sorry, what?"
Sheldon knew his intelligence was superior to both of the two people standing in front of him, but even so, he didn't see what was so confusing about his statement.
"Amy will be sleeping in my bed."
Penny and Leonard looked at each other and then back at Sheldon. This time it was Leonard who spoke up first. "Um…with you?"
Sheldon was shocked. "Of course not. I'll be sleeping on the couch."
Penny and Leonard looked at each other again and said, "Ooooh."
Sheldon looked back and forth between the two of them. "Why on earth would you think Amy and I would share a bed?"
Penny chuckled. "Oh Sweetie…" She turned to Leonard. "Maybe we should get him a book to read."
Sheldon frowned. "How will reading a book answer my question about why you think Amy and I would share a bed?"
Leonard raised his eyebrows and lightly patted Sheldon's arm. (What was with all the touching from these two?) "Nevermind."
Sheldon couldn't be sure, but he thought he detected sarcasm…or perhaps it was condescension. He shrugged. He didn't really care either way.
He looked at the two of them. "So?"
Leonard and Penny looked at each other and then back at Sheldon, both looking confused.
"So what?" Penny asked.
"Good grief." Talking to these two was like trying to talk to a hyperactive gerbil. "Can you drive me around to look at apartments for Amy?"
"Oh! Yeah, that." Penny nodded. "Sure, I can take you one day."
Leonard looked as if he was about to refuse, but Penny gave him a look. He sighed. "Yeah, sure, I can help as well…assuming you don't find an apartment when Penny takes you first."
Penny glared at him. "Thanks for that."
Leonard smiled back. "Any time."
As expected, the search for a suitable apartment for Amy took several days of driving, viewing, and rejecting. Penny thought the apartment on Euclid was "cute", and didn't understand why Sheldon vetoed it based on its lack of nearby bus stops. Leonard told Sheldon that the two bedroom apartment on Vine was perfectly suitable, and well within Amy's price range, and didn't understand why Sheldon vetoed it based on the fact that Amy didn't need two bedrooms. Leonard again claimed confusion when Sheldon vetoed the large studio apartment for not having enough bedrooms. It was only after Leonard threatened to stop driving him around that Sheldon finally found something suitable. It was a one bedroom apartment, within good distance of a bus stop, and was, in fact, not all that far from 2311 Los Robles.
Sheldon wrote about the particulars to Amy, scanning and sending the necessary paperwork for her to sign, as well. They had finally taken up emailing, since time was an issue, and since Amy may be on the road during part of their correspondence. Sheldon's friends all asked him, each on separate occasions, why he and Amy didn't just use the telephone, and no matter how many times he tried explaining that he and Amy preferred electronic communications, they continued to repeat the question. It was very irritating.
After several weeks of emails and faxing of signed leases, the day which Amy was scheduled to arrive at Sheldon's apartment arrived. He woke up early, his stomach feeling funny. He wasn't quite sure of the cause. His previous day's meals had all been usual, nothing out of the ordinary. Even the timing of said meals had been usual. He didn't feel nauseated either. But his stomach most definitely felt funny.
The only time he could recall feeling similar was just as he was preparing to accept his award a few months back. He had been nervous that time…but what did he have to feel nervous about now? He couldn't think of a reason. Amy was his oldest friend, and he was excited by the prospect of seeing her again. His stomach fluttered. Odd.
Sheldon glanced at the clock and decided to get up and start preparing for Amy's arrival. The itinerary she emailed him had her scheduled to arrive at half past six this evening. Sheldon had emailed her yesterday evening to find out what she would like to have for dinner. They were ordering Thai food.
Sheldon turned on his computer to check his email, hoping that Amy thought to check hers before she started driving. He knew it was a little early, but her itinerary had stated that she would begin driving at 5:30 a.m. He opened his email account and was happy to see that Amy had replied.
After confirming Amy's meal request, he went out into the living room to watch some television before breakfast. He soon found, however, that he could not keep his attention fixed on the television. He kept glancing at his watch to see if it was time for breakfast.
This was the first time he had ever wished to deviate from his schedule, but he was anxious to begin his day; he had many errands to run before Amy arrived. He contemplated the pros and cons of eating breakfast early. On the one hand, if he ate early he could get started early on his errand running; not to mention he was already hungry and his allotted breakfast time was still forty-five minutes away. On the other hand, if he ate breakfast a full forty-five minutes early then his entire digestive system would be forty-five minutes off for the next twenty-four hours at least.
After glancing at his watch yet again, he made a decision. He was going to eat breakfast early. Consequences be darned. He happily got up and headed for the kitchen, grabbing a cereal at the high fiber end of the shelf. If he was going to deviate from his schedule, wreaking havoc on his digestive system, then the least he could do is maintain a high fiber diet.
After breakfast and a shower, Sheldon ran his errands. Among the list of things to do was to buy a variety of feminine hygiene products, some yogurt he had read about that is specifically designed to regulate the female bowel, and, in case the yogurt works, some scented candles.
After running his variety of errands, he returned home to find Raj and Howard present in his living room. As he walked through the door, carrying his bags, they were both huddled around Leonard's computer screen, whispering to each other.
Sheldon frowned in confusion. "What are you doing?"
Both Raj and Howard whipped their heads around quickly, as Howard immediately closed the lap top.
"Nothing important," said Raj in a rush.
"Nope! Nothing important," Howard agreed.
Sheldon shrugged. He didn't really care what they were doing.
He went to put away his groceries and other items. He then spent a good portion of the afternoon thoroughly cleaning the apartment, and then finalizing the welcome packet for Amy. His stomach continued to bother him, but, as it had not interfered with his eating habits, he chose to ignore it.
When he had completed all tasks, he looked at the time. 4:30 in the afternoon. Amy was not scheduled to arrive for another two hours. Hmm. He looked around his room. What else could he do? He looked at his watch again. 4:31. Well, that was a fruitless exercise.
He went out into the living room to join Leonard, Raj, and Howard, who were currently electronically bowling. He sat down on his spot, declining to take part in the virtual bowling. He watched for a couple of minutes, but his eyes glazed over as he took to wondering where Amy was. He hoped she didn't encounter bad traffic…he would hate to postpone dinner when his dietary schedule was already out of whack.
He tapped his fingers on his knees, then glanced at his watch again. 4:42. Perhaps he should brush his teeth. He got up and walked to the bathroom.
After brushing his teeth he looked at his watch again. 4:46.
He walked back into his room, double, and triple, checking that everything was in its correct place. He opened the welcome packet and checked to make sure all the necessary documents were provided. He even took them out and read through them all, checking for grammatical and spelling errors. After he was satisfied that everything was as it should be he glanced at his watch again. 5:08.
He sighed and walked back out into the living room, sitting again in his spot, watching the other three bowl…he tapped his fingers on his knees again…he looked at his watch. 5:17.
He sighed and got up to get a bottle of water and then went back to sit down, to resume watching the virtual bowling…he tapped his fingers on his knees…he took a sip of his water…he looked at his watch. 5:22.
This was maddening! He sighed again.
Leonard looked over at him. "Are you ok Sheldon?"
Sheldon looked at his lap, fidgeting with his water bottle. "I'm fine."
"Are you sure? You keep sighing…maybe you should play a round with us…it'll help keep your mind off of Amy."
Sheldon considered for a moment, looking at his watch again. 5:23. They weren't scheduled to leave to pick up the food until 5:45. But what if they ran into traffic and didn't get back in time? Maybe they had better leave now, just to be safe.
"I think we should go get the food."
Leonard raised his eyebrows. "Really? What time is it?"
Sheldon looked at his watch. "It's 5:24"
"You want to leave twenty minutes early?"
Sheldon nodded. "Yes. What if there is traffic? Or what if someone arrives ahead of us and places an abnormally large order and we are forced to wait an extra twenty minutes and then Amy arrives and I'm not here and the only people available to welcome her to our home are Koothrapali and Wolowitz and she thinks that I trust the two of them to be able to welcome her in my absence? Yes, we should most definitely leave now."
Leonard gave Sheldon a curious look. "Ok…we can leave now."
Leonard went to his room to grab his jacket. Sheldon looked over at Raj and Howard to find they were both staring open mouthed at him. He frowned. "Why are you staring?"
Raj closed his mouth, the corners of his mouth curling down, slowly shaking his head. "No reason…" He and Howard looked at each other, eyebrows raised, and then resumed their bowling.
Leonard came back and he and Sheldon started towards the door. As Sheldon was closing the door behind him he heard Raj say to Howard, "Have you ever seen Sheldon so worked up over a person?"
Sheldon rolled his eyes. The least they could do was wait until he was out of earshot before talking about him. They had commented on his Vulcan hearing enough to know that he'd be able to hear them.
By the time he and Leonard returned with the food, it was 6:18. He had most certainly made the right decision to leave early. But he still had twelve minutes before Amy's arrival. He walked to the kitchen to get plates and bring them to the coffee table.
"Since when do we eat off of plates?" Howard asked.
"Since today," Sheldon responded.
"Why?"
Sheldon shrugged. "Why not? It will make for a more pleasant eating environment if we were eating off of plates rather than out of take-out boxes."
Penny came running in, dressed in her Cheesecake Factory uniform. "Did I miss it? Is she here yet?"
Leonard smiled. "Nope. Have a seat." He patted the seat next to him. Penny walked over, grabbing a plate and starting to help herself to the food.
"Ugh. Penny!" Sheldon said, exasperated. "You can't serve yourself yet. We have to wait for Amy to get here first and we still have…" He glanced at his watch and heard a knock on the door.
Everyone looked at the door. Sheldon blinked, looking back at his watch. 6:27. Amy was early. As he looked at the door, his heart started beating irregularly and his stomach problem got markedly worse. He should probably schedule a doctor's appointment in the morning.
"Um…Sheldon?"
He looked over at Penny. "Yes?"
"Get the door, Sweetie."
"Oh. Of course." He walked over and opened the door.
A/N: :)
