Chapter 6

In the habit of decomposing, right before your very (lalalala) eyes; along with the people inside.

-PATD


Drake stomped down the stairs. A part of him surprised at how numb he felt on the outside. Like there was nothing outside of the malestrom inside of him, emotions warring within him for dominance.

Angerdeceptionsadnesssuprise every emotion under the cold sun fueled his actions as Drake walked through the refraction of light thrown onto the foyer floor through the opaque glass of the front door.

Everything but happiness. Happiness was lost upon the rapid hardening of his heart.

Drake wondered absently if he was becoming catatonic (a word that Josh had taught him) as he swung open the door to the sweltering heat of the front lawn.

Drake couldn't feel the heat, though.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, away from the crumbling of his psyche, Drake wondered where his nerve endings had disappeared to.

His body still on autopilot, Drake walked slowly towards the deathtrap that was their car, vaguely aware of the 'crunching' sound he made with each step.

His hand registered 'cold' as he gripped the car door handle that he knew was supposed to be scorching hot.

What a time for his physical pain receptors to be broken, Drake thought, just when he needed something to take his mind off of the all that emotional pain that was causing chaos in his being.

Drake, still on autopilot, dug around in the glove compartment for the spare key.

("So you don't get locked in the car with nowhere to go." Josh had joked.)

Drake turned the aformentioned key in the ignition, the sudden rumbling bringing him out of his waking dream state for a fraction of a second. He became acutely aware of the extreme heat within the car and how his sweat glands poured salty fluids in an attempt to maintain homeostasis (something else Josh had taught him about). Then the moment passed, and the thick blanket of numbness layered itself over Drake once again.

It would have been suffocating if it wasn't so welcome.

Drake drove himself to the draugstore, six blocks away, and parked haphazardly in the almost empty parking lot.

Drake's mind was full of scattered thoughts about Josh, or, more specifically, the boy Josh was with.

Who was he? Why hadn't Drake seen him before? Why was Josh kissing him?

Drake could hazard a guess at the last one, although he desperately fought against thinking about it.

PING

Whoops. Drake realized abruptly that he had told Josh that he wanted to talk to him, and then he just up and left.

Drake told himself that it was for the best, he didn't really have anything to say to Josh. He just wanted to get him away from that boy. He thought of how Josh had leaned against him without even realizing it. Drake's stomach dropped and his heart tried to beat its way out of his throat.

That was a good sign. At least his heart was still working.

Drake realized that he was taking up two parking spaces and that he still had the car running. He cut the engine and reclined the seat below window level.

And he cried.

Hot, painful tears slicing their way down Drake's face.