"Hi, Taylor."

"Hi, Jude."

Jude tucked his cell phone between his ear and his shoulder so that he could unlock his front door. He let himself in and waited for her to say something else, but she didn't. He sighed. It shouldn't have to be this tense or this strange with Taylor. He flicked on his lights and spoke again.

"What's up?" Jude asked.

"I just feel like we haven't had a real conversation in a while," she said, and her voice was small. She didn't sound like the vibrant Taylor that he usually knew.

That didn't keep Jude from snapping at her, because he was angry and he was allowed to be. He hadn't had a single hand in the strangeness that was between himself and Taylor. "Because you keep sending me one word texts or not answering at all! Am I supposed to talk to myself?"

"No. I'm sorry." She really did sound apologetic and Jude's defensiveness dropped away.

"You don't need to apologize. I just want to know what's going on."

While he waited for her to answer, Jude gathered up some pieces of laundry and dragged it all into his bathroom, throwing his work shirt into his washer first. He had more than enough time to complete his task before Taylor spoke again.

"There's nothing going on. Daria and I have just been arguing a little and it was more draining than I thought it would be. That's all, Jude."

"Arguing about what?" Jude asked, suspicious. He didn't believe her at all, but he didn't know if it was a good idea or not to push her.

"You know what," Taylor replied sharply. She sighed. "What about you, Jude? How are you?"

Jude hesitated, and then he decided that he couldn't push Taylor. He knew how she would react and he knew that it wouldn't be good. He'd rather not have her stop talking to him, though, and decided to just leave her to go at her own pace. "I'm good. I've been spending a lot of time with Connor recently."

"Ooh!" Taylor exclaimed. "Anything good happening?"

"Not like you're thinking. We went to the movies and we … we held hands," Jude admitted, though he almost didn't. Holding hands was a big deal to Connor, and he knew that, and it almost seemed like fair too intimate of a detail to divulge.

"Do you think he likes you?"

"I don't think so. I mean, yes, as a friend. That's all I can ask from him. But … I think I'm going to tell him that I like him."

"Jude! What!? Why!?"

Jude grabbed a bottle of water out of his fridge and then sat down on the couch. "Taylor, you don't know him, so I don't really expect you to get it."

"I'm not an idiot!"

"That's not how I meant it! He's a little hard to explain."

"Try," Taylor said in a deadpan.

"He's, I don't know what word to use, naïve, I guess. In some ways. Not with everything. But I know that there's some things that he just doesn't get and I know that he won't unless I tell him. And I know that he trusts me. So, with all of that, I feel like I'm lying to him by not telling him the way that I really feel."

"What if he stops talking to you?"

"I've thought about that. I really don't think he will. I don't know what his reaction will be but I definitely think that he'll keep talking to me. I just don't want to make a mistake."

"Oh, you've got it bad."

"Yeah," Jude agreed, because it was true. He leant against the back of his couch and sighed. "I really, really like him, Taylor."

"When are you seeing him again?"

"Tomorrow for class and lunch. And then we've got a study date on Saturday before work but I want to take him to that ice-cream place too. The one with the really weird flavours."

"Jude, I have something to tell you."

"Hmm?"

"You're already dating."

Jude barked out a laugh, though he was shaking his head. With anyone else he had a crush on, it would have been a harmless joke and something that the other party probably would have laughed at too. When it came to Connor, however, Jude shook his head at it. He didn't want to force anything on Connor, even something that was said lightly and teasingly.

"I'm going to tell him."

"Tell me how it goes," Taylor said.

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about anything? I've been worried about you."

"I'm fine. Daria's been moody and so I've been moody back. I thought living with my best friend would be easy. Maybe I should have lived with a stranger."

"You and Daria love each other and you've been fine for years. Everyone fights. We fight all the time … because you've got a big mouth."

Taylor gave a short laugh at that. "All right, Jude, fair. I, uh, I have to go but I'll text you, okay?"

"Okay, Taylor. I hope it gets better soon."

"Me too. Bye, Jude."

Jude hung up the phone and flattened himself out along the length of the couch. He crossed his ankles over the opposite arm and sighed. He didn't know what he was doing when it came to Connor. Jude had only had one boyfriend before. He'd met Dylan at the start of ninth grade and they had been dating by the beginning of tenth. Ultimately, it had been Dylan who had done most of the pursuing although there hadn't been much to be done. He and Dylan had been friends before the relationship and being together had been … easy. Jude had cared about Dylan, a lot, but in retrospect he could admit that there was also a flavour of convenience to their relationship too. There had been other gay kids at their school but Dylan was the one that he was closest too. They had some shared interests, Dylan was sweet, and Dylan had respected the physical boundaries that Jude had put up around their relationship. They'd ended it because he was going to an art school in Chicago and Jude was staying in California for college. It had hurt Jude to end such a long relationship and he'd missed Dylan a lot in the aftermath but it wasn't the painful, heart-wrenching loss that Jude had expected from a first love. His first boyfriend had meant a lot to him, and always would mean a lot to him, but his past relationship didn't give him any good perspective on how to talk to Connor as a person that Jude was interested in. It was new territory for him and Jude would just have to see where it went.

(-.-)

Jude turned in his seat so that he could face Connor, who was curled in the passenger seat of Jude's car. They'd finished their studying with enough time to spare before Jude's shift and it had been fairly easy to convince Connor to try the ice-cream shop. After getting their ice-cream, they'd returned to Gerald to eat, as it was a lot more comfortable than the small, crowded shop.

"What do you think?"

"Raspberry shortbread is my new favourite."

"Raspberries have nothing on vanilla honey."

"Do I have to believe you?" Connor asked.

"No, not about this."

"I like raspberries."

"Raspberries are good." Jude shifted further into his seat to look at Connor. "Can I talk to you about something? It's kind of important."

"Sure." Connor turned to so that they were square to each other. "That's what friends are for, right?"

"Right. Um, it's just hard for me to say, I guess."

Connor seemed more hesitant and he played with his black plastic spoon, tapping it against the inside of his ice-cream dish. "Is it bad?"

"I don't think it's bad. I won't know what you think until I tell you so …" Jude took a deep breath. "Connor, I like you."

Connor met his gaze. In this light, his eyes looked more of a light brown than the green that Jude had first observed. Connor's hazel eyes were just one of his many heart-stopping features. Jude watched Connor try and sort through what he had just said. His reply was, ultimately, a simple one. "We're friends."

"Right. We are. And I want us to be. But I … like you. More than just as a friend."

"Oh," Connor whispered breathlessly. He chewed on the end of his spoon for a second. "Oh."

"I don't expect you to say the same thing back or for anything to come of me saying it. I don't expect us to date. But I felt like I was lying to you by not telling you and I wanted you to know the truth. Does that make sense?"

Connor nodded. Slowly, he turned so that he was facing the windshield.

"Connor?"

"Can I go home now?"

"Yeah, okay. I have to go to work soon anyway."

Connor leant against the car door, as far away from Jude as he could get in the confined space. Jude started up the car and tried not to take it personally. He couldn't, and didn't, fault Connor for his reaction. But he hoped that Connor didn't hate him for saying anything. Jude hoped Connor would speak on the drive back to campus, but he didn't.

"I hope we're still going to hang out."

"Yeah."

Jude could tell that Connor was saying it because it was what he thought Jude wanted to hear.

"Would you rather I didn't tell you?" Jude asked.

Connor waited until Gerald had parked before responding.

"I don't know, Jude. I don't know what to say or think. If … If that's all right."

"Of course it is."

"I'll see you on Monday."

"Yeah," Jude said. "Monday. Bye, Connor."

"Bye, Jude. I hope you have a good shift."

"Thanks."

Jude didn't move until Connor was out of sight. Then, he started Gerald again and started driving, knowing that there were still forty minutes left until he had to be at work. He wanted to think that he hadn't just made a huge mistake. He didn't feel a sense of impending doom but he still tapped his fingers anxiously on the steering wheel. He didn't know what was going to happen on Monday, but he hoped that things didn't change. He liked the way that they were.

He liked Connor being his friend.

(-.-)

As more than a friend.

As more than a friend.

As more than a friend.

Connor paced his tiny room, running his towel over his wet hair. He grabbed a bottle of water and, while he drank from it, he took another lap around his room. He was running out of things to distract himself with. It was nearly eleven at night and, usually, he tried to make himself go to bed by now. He was too keyed up to sleep, even though he'd made himself go to the gym earlier that day. Ever since he'd said goodbye to Jude this afternoon, he felt like he'd had an entire pot of coffee. Jude liked him. Connor did not know how to deal with that. He didn't want to deal with that.

He wished that he had someone that he could talk to this to. He knew that he could talk to his therapist about it, but he saw her once a week on Thursday mornings. He had to see Jude again Monday.

"Do I want to see Jude again?" Connor asked the empty room. "If I say I don't want to, he'll leave me alone. I know he will."

You want to see him again. He's your friend. Your only friend.

Connor threw his towel over the towel bar in his washroom and then threw the now-empty water bottle into his recycling bin. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep until he sorted through things in his head and came to some sort of conclusion. He needed to be able to come to some sort of peace about it in his head, at least something that would carry him through to the morning.

"Jude and I are friends. He said he didn't expect that to change. I trust that."

It was enough.

It had to be enough.

The chapter's title is after the song Be The Song by Foy Vance. If you have a song that reminds you of Barefoot And Bruised and would like it to be on the playlist – and possibly a chapter title – send it in and let me know! I'd love to hear your playlist suggestions! (Chapter titles are mostly chosen via shuffle.)

So, on tumblr I'm: we are all of legend now (with dashes between every word). If you want to find my replies to anon reviews, add backslash tagged backslash anon dash replies. If you want to see anything I post about Barefoot And Bruised, go to my tumblr URL and add backslash tagged backslash barefoot dash and dash bruised dash. Punctuation is spelled out due to Fanfiction's restrictions. If you're having any trouble accessing the tumblr content please send me a pm and I can format it for you in a different way.

~TLL~