AN: Sorry for the long delay between my last update. I was out of town for Spring Break and didn't have time to bpost before I left. And sadly, this is one of the shorter chapters. Well, for me anyways. I'm not a big fan of chapters. It drives me crazy enough only being able to read any of the super awesome amazing stories I read on here one chapter at a time, let alone when the chapters are short and leave you hanging!

Anyways, hope you like this. A little bit more of Amaya's past is revealed here and just why she can't forgive herself for her past. Honestly, I don't know if I would ever be able to forgive myself if I ever did anything like this. There's a bit more Zetsu and Amaya action in here too when they don't want to rip each others faces off. Yay! They might be finally warming up to each other :D

Or are they?

Muwahahahaha!

On my last note, thanks fo much for the reviews you guys are giving me, for the few of you guys that are. I'm slightly bummed I'm not getting more, but I guess I just have to roll with the hand I'm dealt.


Chapter 9

Crystal Tears

It didn't matter which way she was going now. It never did in the first place. She needed to find someone now. Anyone. As long as they could help. Hiroshi cried, nearly forgotten in her arms. His lightweight was starting to burn. None of it mattered. Nothing would matter if she didn't get there fast enough, nothing in the world.

There was a crash. Jolting up straight her grip around the baby tightened. He let out a weak gurgle in protest, but not all of the sound in world could have caught her attention. Only the dull beating of her heart touched the edges of her mind. Her wide eyes were glued in front of her.

A mangled body.

The cruel twist in his arm and the shallow breathing hammered against her heart. His form was held up by several figures behind him by the short strands of hair. Amaya recoiled, covering her mouth with silent tears at the smell of the blood. Even in the dark tunnel, she could make out the features of his face. Shaking her head, she pulled Hiroshi tighter.

It couldn't be. No, he had promised to protect her forever. He said he would stop them no matter what and that she would never have to be alone again.

"I-I'm sorry," he sputtered.

Amaya's eyes watered as she stared at the body of her father. She could see the blood running down his face, the sickly way his arms bent and the blood trailing down from shuriken sticking out of his body. Her father. They got him.

"Aw, look what I've got here, the old man's daughter. How touching," one of the ninja behind him sneered, kicking him in the back. He let out a cry, falling down onto the cold hard floor. It in the dark she could see his eyes close.

"How about it Sweetie?" another asked, ripping him back up by his messy blonde hair.

He didn't even try to move. This couldn't' be right. Her dad would never give up like this. He was strong and brave. He would never give up.

"Want to see your daddy die?"

Without a second to answer, he pulled out a kunai, slashing across his throat. Gasping, Amaya stumbled forward, but it was too late. She could see the life leave her father's eyes as he hit the ground with a heavy thud. She could see her father die in front of her eyes. The last person she had left.

Hiroshi barely could move in her arms, still trying to push away with the desperate struggle only an infant could have. He was left forgotten, crushed against her chest.

No, no it couldn't be. This couldn't be right. The Seekers weren't supposed to win. They were the bad guys, evil. They weren't ever supposed to get her father. She shook her head melodically casting away the sight in front of her, holding Hiroshi tighter and tighter. The baby's face was smothered into her shoulder, unable to get any air. This couldn't be her father. He said that he would protect her. He told her he take care of her.

"No," she murmured, feeling the tears run down her face.

She couldn't deny it. Her knees went weak seeing her father dead, his blood pooling around him. The gaping hole in her chest tore further. First mother and then father. Everyone around her. The empty void crushed down all around her. Gasping for breath, she stared up into the eyes of the murders. Their smirks stuck an unknown cord in her.

"Looks like you made her angry," the first spoke.

"Good. I like a bit of a fight when I kill someone."

Energy burst around her cracking the air that surrendered her weak body. How dare they? All of them. Murderers. Seekers. Twisted cold-blooded freaks stealing everything away from her.

Suddenly everything that had seemed to dark to her blazed in light. Her pupils morphed, shaping into oval bulbs in the center of her wide tear-filled eyes as her body trembled and quaked. Their movements twisted in front of her, slowly twisting until everything was so slow. They seemed to stop in front of her.

In her rage, she screamed, collapsing in on herself. The sound cut through the air. The men flew back as everything around them started to change. The ground shook. Cracks cut through the cement walls of the tunnel, webbing up the walls over their head. Loose rocks crashed down, splashing up in the water all around them, some landing on them.

Everything was alive. Everything moved. All she wanted to do was kill them. Kill them all for what they had done.

Their faces. Cold. Petrified. The looks in their eyes, burned into their brains as they died. She watched it. All of the pain and blood. The death. Their voices and deaths screamed in her head. It was pounding. Things were too sharp, too vivid. Each detail overloaded her brain, but she couldn't stop. She didn't want it to. Their cries, their blood curling screams were fueling her. She wanted to see them bleed.

The last one fell with a splash in the ankle deep water that filled the underground tunnel. Dust and debris fell down from above as the last of her anger drained out.

Her father….

He was gone.

dead.

Her entire body trembled at the sight in front of her. For the first time she could see it.

She killed them.

Horrified she sunk to her knees, aware that Hiroshi had finally stopped crying. With a sob, she released her grip slightly on the poor baby, taking in her face, but what she saw made her scream in agony. He was dead. She suffocated her little brother.

"N-No, no, no!" she cried, tearing at her hair. "Oh God. I-I'm so s-s-s-sorry."

Words couldn't describe the pain she felt knowing she had turned into one of them. She killed like a Seeker. Her eyes stared hard at the mangled corpse of her father as she cradled her baby brother back into her arms, sobbing hysterically for what she had done. They were gone.

Father said that he would always be there.

Shooting out of bed, I clutched at my chest gasping as the fire shot through me. I sucked in another pained breath my lungs caught fire, burning through my body hotter than embers, ripping through my arms and legs, tearing apart my flesh like molten lava corroding away my very being.

It wasn't possible, the pain. It couldn't be real. The fire blazed hotter and hotter. I couldn't breathe. Gasping I clutched my throat trying to cut off the fire.

Clutching for the kunai under my pillow I held it out in the air, hand trembling too much. In the dark, I could see enemies, millions of enemies, the men I had killed, the men I would be forced to kill. Through the blurs and chocks ripping from inside of me, I could see them all slithering closer. Seekers. Killers. All of them inched closer and closer. I couldn't breathe.

As soon as I pulled out my kunai out I realized what it was. With a shaky breath the burning slowly subsided.

It was just another memory.

I let out a choked sigh, letting my arms drop helplessly to my sides. Everything shook as I stared off into nothing. I didn't think I could see anything if I tried. I could feel the unbearable weight of killing my brother fall back onto my shoulders, knowing I killed the one person my father trusted me to protect when Seekers came to murder him. The tears fell heavily down my cheeks as I silently cried. Nothing in the world could ever wipe away that fact. I killed the last person I ever had in the world. Nothing.

The kunai in my hand was heavy. I couldn't tear my eyes off the cold, sharp metal. Would I kill someone with this two?

"You talk in your sleep," a rough quiet voice stated making my heart batter against my chest.

Clasping the kunai again, I snapped it shakily back into the air, pointing towards the figure standing against the wall. My eyes never focused. He shook and twisted in front of me, bending into three different people before smashing back into one. Quickly I whipped the tears from my eyes, trying to breathe normally. A second later, I recognized him. It was impossible to forget those two pupil-less golden eyes.

"W-What?" I choked out.

"You talk in your sleep," he repeated, staring deep into me. "You're an annoying sleeper, you know that?" his other half asked making me huff. "Scared you though, didn't I? Ha!"

Startled, I pulled back, placing the kunai back under my pillow. I was surprised to see him considering he had finished his mission. I was a prisoner here. He never had to see me again if he didn't want to. In the corners of my mind, I wish he wouldn't.

Maybe if he would have said something like this at a different time I would have thought it was very strange that he actually seemed to enjoying teasing me, not that it was too surprising, but right now, I couldn't care less what he did. I'd stop caring about him the moment he brought Katsu to this place.

Taking his insult to heart, I stared down. I was too bare, too breakable now to fight off anything he said. In my head, I kept seeing the images over and over again, seeing the precious life force drain out of the men and feeling me crush their future.

Barely able to look up, I stared helplessly into Zetsu's eyes. I fidgeted nervously under his gaze. It felt like he could see everything about me. He probably could. "W-Wh-What…" I paused wetting my lips. "What d-di-did I s-say?"

He stared at me for a long time, a mixed look on his face. The black half mumbled something I couldn't understand that the white half didn't seem to like. They debated quietly among themselves, most of the time seeming to take their conversation into their mind. After a second, he finally looked back at me, his golden eyes weighing me back down to earth as my only lifeline right now. "You kept saying 'I'm sorry' again and again," the smooth voice finally said.

Cringing I looked away, shivering in a nonexistent breeze.

"H-H-How-How'd you g- get in here?" I whispered, desperate to fill the air with something. Something besides the silence that cut into me. Something to hide me from the truth.

Zetsu shifted, seemingly uncomfortable, watching me cry in front of him, but if he had a problem, he didn't say anything. Instead, the Venus flytrap on his shoulders curled open more, for once showing the bare skin of his shoulders as he peered condescendingly at me. "The door. How else would I get in here, baka?"

Lying back down, I stared off at the sidewall, replacing my kunai back under my pillow but still held onto it, unwilling to let go. "R-Ri-Right," I murmured.

The room was silent, filling me with my thoughts as the time ticked slowly by. I couldn't tell if the tears had stopped or if I had passed back out, but the next thing I knew I heard footsteps coming closer and those two hypnotic golden eyes appeared once again in front of me, capturing my breaking heart in a way I couldn't decide. He may have been a murderer and scum, but Zetsu was here. I looked up at him blankly, dead inside until I saw his black hand reaching out towards me.

Jerking back, I panicked, sucking in a deep breath as his searing grip grabbed my upper arm. His skin was like fire against my own, proving of how cold and clammy I seemed to be all of the sudden. I froze when instead of flinging me across the room like I had expected, I found myself being pulled gently up in bed until I was sitting, his white hand forcing my face up to look him in the eyes. They were hard, guarded, but I didn't have the effort to try to read anything in them anyways.

As soon as it had begun, his grip was gone, leaving me feeling surprisingly cold and bare without his touch. Zetsu had stepped back, staring back towards the door. "It's time to train. Come on Amaya," he announced.

I shivered as he said my name. It sounded so different coming out of his mouth. Different than I expected. Chills shot up my spine making my brain buzz in a weird way, and I quickly wiped off the tears that were still streaming down my face.

My head perked up, thankfully for a temporary distraction. "Training?" I asked clueless. "Wh-What training?"

"Leader-sama wants you to start training," he answered blandly, walking over towards the door. He paused a moment staring at me. The unreadable look was back in his eyes and I stared at him waiting for him to do something. Nevertheless, it didn't seem like he knew exactly what to do for some reason, whether to leave or try and say something.

I wasn't quite sure how to answer so I nodded to acknowledge I understood. For the moment, I would probably do anything he told me to do. I couldn't' think. I didn't know how. Mentioning Pein brought back a strange sense of reality. My hands didn't tremble nearly as much as I pulled my knees to my chest. They didn't fumble clumsily over the covers as I forced myself to relax.

Every time I closed my eyes, I could still see Hiroshi's little face. His beautiful little face…

I took away his future.

Zetsu moved towards the door upon seeing I wasn't going to protest. I shivered at the thought of being alone. Right now, I didn't see a cold-blooded murderer when I looked up into his strange eyes; I saw a man.

"Z-Zetsu-san," I murmured, unaware of the respect I gave him. He froze, his hand on the door. "Please d-don't tell anyone-ne."

It was quiet. Then, after a moment, he left.

I sat in bed for a long time, my mind unusually blank. It took me longer than it usually did to pull myself out of bed to get ready for training, but somehow I must have even though I could remember any of it when I was finished.

My own dream made me wonder if Katsu was having nightmares too, nightmares I wouldn't be able to be there to make vanish. I wouldn't be there to hold him.

Before I realized it, there was one sharp knock on the door. Jerking up, I hurried to open it, surprised to see Konan standing on the other side instead of Zetsu. I guess I had just assumed he would be the one taking me to training since he had woken me up, but I must have been wrong.

Konan assessed me quickly, noticing how glassy and red my eyes were. "I see you're already awake." Her voice was soft, musical almost, but I couldn't help but be disturbed by what she said.

Didn't she know Zetsu had already been here to wake me?

Frowning, I chose not to say anything as she suddenly turned; leading me to a large open room I assumed was to be one of their training areas and was left alone. Konan didn't say a word or give me any inclination of what I should be doing before turning once again and shutting the door behind her.

With nothing better to do, I fiddled with the hem of my shirt, taking the time to glance around at my surroundings. From my memory, I placed this as the second training area, further back into the rock than the other three. That would place it one hallway up from my cell—one more away from Katsu who was in the other direction.

It was open enough. The ceilings stretched higher above any other room I had been in yet with several large stalactites hanging looming over my head. It took nearly thirty candles to light the room, still leaving most of it in darkness. Anything I could possibly need was here: kunai, shuriken, wooden posts, targets, and many other things. The only problem was I had nothing to train.

With a heavy sigh, I laid down, staring up at the ceiling. My eyes met only the dark cervices hidden in the shadows. It whispered something evil. This place is too dark, I grumbled closing my eyes. Everywhere I had been in this place was dark. It only made me think of the tunnel that ran under my old house and all of the horrible things it hid. I should do something about it…

There didn't seem to be anything better to do. While I was doing this then I could think of something else I did need to work on if I was going to get out of here and ever see Katsu again. I looked up at the ceiling again for a moment decided where it would be best placed to give the most light. Using my chakra, I called on the rock under my feet. Easily the ground rose listing me way up to the ceiling like a pedestal.

Every ninja specialized in one element of chakra out of the five: water, fire, earth, lightning, and wind. All five of the elements were always present inside the body, but each person would have a unique balance. For me, I had both lightning and earth, which gave me the metal element. Later on my father had taught me how to draw on water, the third most present element in my body, but it was harder to control considering there was less water type chakra in my body than in others. It was something simple every ninja learned. My father had made sure he taught me how to master the elements. He said it was vital to becoming a great ninja.

One of the only reasons I was able to learn how to control my chakra types so quickly was due to my abilities to sense chakras. I could feel the energy inside everything, even nature.

I forgot how easy it was only to use only one chakra at a time. It felt like I was raising my arm or taking a breath. It was second nature. When I stopped at the ceiling, I placed my hand on the wall, using my chakra to find the weakest point. I forced back the rock in a large circle.

Switching to water and lightning I pulled the different chakras into each palm, one crackling excitedly, zapping pleasantly through my body, the other washing over me and soothing my body. The energy buzzed inside my body as I held it in, waiting for the exact moment I could combine the two. I placed my palms together letting the chakra meet. As I slowly pulled my hands apart, I moved them over the opening. Then before I knew it they twisted, forcing together mixing and forming a giant crystal.

Light burst against the crystal shooting down throughout the room. Instantly everything lit up, illuminating everything. It was so bright I had to look away.

Satisfied, I came down replacing the earth the way it had been before and basking in the light. At least now, I knew it was daytime outside. I didn't even let myself think about moving away the rock and escaping, as I knew I could. It would be too easy to get away right now with no one watching and my mind spinning too fast for me to think. I knew I would have to leave Katsu if I did that.

I would never leave him.