DISCLAIMER: My bank account would have a lot more zeroes in it if I owned this.

Ch9…Seeing Things

***

Kelso had always done things in a different order to everyone else, yet somehow it still surprised Donna when he bought his midlife crisis car when he was twenty. He loved that thing like a baby, at times she had even considered asking him which he would save from fire first; Betsy or the car, but she feared the answer. He may love that car but he also loved his friends, they were his family. So she probably shouldn't have been surprised to see that red car in the parking lot of the hospital, in the disabled parking no less. Kelso was drumming his fingers on the steering wheel to some song although his radio was silent. She watched him for a few minutes as always amazed at his ability to tune the rest of the world out before knocking on the glass.

"Hey big D, you here to see Jackie?"

She ignored the muffin of guilt poking at her, it's funny what you can get used to if it happens to you enough and shook her head.

"Hyde, do you know what floor he's on?"

Kelso's hair swung around his head like a halo, oh how images deceive.

"I dunno but Mrs. Forman is in there with Jackie she'll know."

That muffin was now more of a hacksaw and it wasn't so easy to ignore, she clutched Kelso's arm and yanked him from the car paying no attention to being careful on the door as she slammed it shut.

"You're coming with me."

He knew he should stay in the car, he knew he should respect her wishes; he knew a lot of things, that had never stopped him from doing the exact opposite of that.

"Sure Donna, wouldn't want you to get lost in there, you could get stranded for hours!"

She turned to her friend, oddly comforted by the fact that while everything else around her had changed she could always rely on Kelso to always be Kelso.

"Come on Kelso let's go see the rival for your crown."

***

No one had really noticed her, not after Eric arrived, the skinny geek had made a great entrance, it had rendered the room silent, for about thirty seconds. Amidst Kitty's crying, WB's threats and Red's growling Jackie had managed to slip from the room into the relative calm of the hallway, she could still hear what was happening in the room but out here she could let herself feel it. Why she wanted to let herself react to the news that Steven had married a stripper, gotten her pregnant and kicked her out she really didn't know. She hated herself for feeling anything in regards to the situation, she hated that her first reaction when the words left WB's mouth and made Hyde turn white was to crawl into his bed and hug his face to her chest stroking his hair. She couldn't cry, there were no tears in her for this because in truth she wasn't surprised, she doubted she could ever not feel something when Steven Hyde was concerned. There were footsteps coming towards her, she thought she could hear her name in the snatches of conversation she could hear approaching but she didn't care enough to look up from her arms where she had her head buried. The footsteps stopped in front of her, she could just barely see the tips of the muddied runners but it was enough for her to know that Michael Kelso was standing before her.

"Jackie, are you okay, what's going on in there?"

That was Donna, her hand on the back of Jackie's head patting softly probably trying to peer around her and into the still loud room. She jerked her head up quickly and looked into Donna's eyes for the first time in weeks, possibly months. The look of sadness mixed with pity made Jackie recoil, she shrunk away from her crawling towards the door, she didn't want those eyes on her skin, and it made her feel dirty. Kelso sunk to his knees and grabbed her shoulders before she could escape into her room, back into the madness.

"I'm so sorry Jackie, this is all my fault, I didn't mean to ruin everything."

This was too much, her head was spinning, Hyde and the baby and then Eric and now Donna and Kelso, it was too much. Her head felt big and her ears were buzzing, she felt numb all over, if she had eaten any of her food rather than flushing it down the toilet she would be throwing up. But as it were she didn't, she felt a sharp stabbing pain and gasped for breath before her eyes rolled back into her head and she stopped breathing.

***

He had to be fancy, no he couldn't just hang around with everybody else playing the harp and being mellow; he wanted a purpose. So now here he was yet again showing some kid why they needed to be around, why they shouldn't give up, hopefully this one wouldn't be as a big of a pain in the ass as that Forman kid had been. She seemed innocent enough, dark hair and small, like a doll. She hadn't asked who he was or why she was here, she just stared, what at was anyone's guess it was all a vast nothingness of white.

"Eric's going to be pissed, he thought the devil belonged in hell."

She had turned to eye him up and down, the white suit, the goatee and hair. Evidently she was unimpressed.

"You're God? I'm guessing you didn't invent a mirror and after you created yourself?"

She was a feisty one; great this was going to be fun.

"You think God spends the afterlife in a cheap suit talking to snotty kids? I'm an Angel baby, I've been sent here to show you why you shouldn't give up, your friends need you."

The small girl snorted, coughing a little from the force of it. She shook her head emphatically.

"Yeah right, I don't have any friends, not anymore."

The Angel smirked, he loved this part. He held his fingers up and clicked, instead of the white they were now in a hospital, Jackie watched in fascination as Donna paced a small waiting room where Kitty was sobbing against Red, Kelso was crying on Eric's shoulder and Fez had his face buried in Eric's lap.

"What is this?"

She turned to the Angel who was cleaning his teeth with his nail.

"The present of course, they're waiting to see if you're going to die. For a girl who has no friends that bunch of people look mighty worried to me."

She shrugged, walking past Eric and peering over at Kelso carefully.

"Guilt does funny things to people. I see Steven's not here. Where is he shouting it from the rooftop? Or is he skipping down the hall singing Ding Dong the wicked witch is dead?"

He clicked his fingers and again the area around them changed, taking the familiar form of the room Jackie had been calling home for the last week. Hyde lay in his bed, restrained staring up at the ceiling with a vacant expression, a tube snaked from his arm to an IV pumping a clear liquid into him. Mina was speaking softly to WB who peered over to Steven with a worried expression on his face.

"Does this thing come with volume control?"

The Angel rolled his eyes and twirled his finger, the voices of Mina and WB instantly rising.

"Are you sure this is necessary?"

Mina sighed looking across at Steven.

"The doctor insisted, the sedative should start to affect him in a few minutes and he'll fall asleep, hopefully we'll know something about Jackie by then."

WB shook his head slowly, a rueful smile decorating his face.

"I hope so."

Jackie turned to glare at the Angel as the two left the room.

"What the hell were they talking about? Why was Steven sedated?"

The Angel leant back against Jackie's empty bed his elbows propped behind him.

"When you collapsed he went into a fit, it took three orderlies to hold him down."

"But why?"

The Angel looked at her, his eye brows crinkled in confusion, surely she wasn't so blind, so naïve.

"He's scared you're going to die and leave him."

Jackie scoffed, looking at the Angel nonplussed.

"He wouldn't care if I never woke up; I'd be doing them all a favour."

She winced as the Angel cracked his fingers, muttering under his breath.

"I love this part."

He held his right hand up and clicked the sound louder than it should have been, it vibrated in her ears. Jackie looked around in confusion as the hospital interior morphed into the Forman basement. Eric reclined on the couch watching the TV. Jackie stared at him, he looked older and sadder, he had bags under his eyes and his whole body seemed sad, just sunken into itself.

"Eric get your lazy butt up here."

Jackie smiled inwardly at Red's voice, he was still around, as abrasive as always. He too was older, his face lined, his back stooped. Kitty was grey and carrying at least a good twenty pounds, her face slack, as though it hadn't smiled in years.

"Where is everybody? Those guys are like cats, they always know when to come for food. And why does Eric look so old?"

The Angel shrugged, patting down his suit, removing invisible lint. Jackie's eyes widened in anger and she kicked the Angel in the shin, huffing. He yelped in pain.

"Gees, try patience young one, it's one of the heavenly virtues."

Jackie raised her foot experimentally, satisfied when the Angel shied away and gestured at the door which opened to allow Donna into the small kitchen.

"Oh my-"

"Shh!"

The Angel glared at her; she rolled her eyes in response.

"I was going to say goodness! But Donna, she's fat! I know I always joked about her giant feet and inhaling food but I never thought she'd need a crane to help her sit down!"

The chair creaked under Donna's weight, Eric patted her hand nervously, kissing her cheek.

"Hey honey."

She grunted in reply and reached for the gravy, dosing her steak with it. Jackie turned to the Angel who smiled innocently at her.

"Get with the explaining. Where's Fez? He would never miss a steak dinner and neither would Steven it's his favourite."

"Well Fez moved to Chicago with Kelso, he's a live in nanny for Betsy. Kelso is working as the towel boy at the Playboy Mansion."

Jackie smiled at that, sounds like those two had the perfect life. She gestured to the small family.

"And them?"

"Donna's pregnant, Eric still lives at home. Kitty is still a nurse, but only to Red for his weak heart."

Jackie felt slightly odd walking around the room, its occupants completely oblivious to her.

"But Donna's not wearing a ring. Aren't she and Eric engaged?"

"He's too scared, and now that she's pregnant when he finally did she went into a tirade about him being pressured into it."

Something inside her felt like laughing but she didn't, it wasn't funny.

"And Steven? Where's he?"

The click sounded like thunder and the kitchen grew dark. Her feet felt cold against the wet grass which clung to her knees as she fell down.

"How?"

Her fingers reached forward to trace over the lettering. Here Lies Steven J. Hyde. Beloved Son and Friend.

"Car accident. After you died, he drove up to your spot in the woods and drank two cases of beer and then tried to drive home. He wrapped his El Camino around a pole, ruptured his spleen. He was unconscious for hours before someone found him, he died in hospital three days later."

The blades of grass stuck to legs as she stood, looking into the eyes of the Angel.

"Is this supposed to make me feel all guilty and then demand to live? Because it doesn't."

"You kids you're never happy. You're living, the rest of us, up there? We just watch. But you, you can live your life. You can make decisions, make mistakes. We have to watch and once in a while intervene and help. And you don't want it. What do you want because I don't think you really want to die."

She breathed out as she closed her eyes, feeling cold.

"Honestly, I don't know anymore, just not this."

The Angel sighed and pursed his lips.

"Great, give me your hand, I need to show you something. Since you are suffering from the 'oh-poor-me's' I'm going to help you."

Jackie looked at the Angel's hand dubiously before placing her palm in his lightly.

"Where are you taking me now?"

He smiled at her conspiratorially.

"Back to the beginning."

***

Hey guys, feel special another update so soon! I've just had my work schedule upped so I will be having less free time but more money. It's sacrifice but I forebear. Please review for me!