Teacups rattled on the tables. Bravado usually preferred alcohol, and he knew the SwinnDell sisters did too, but that was hardly appropriate in the middle of the day, especially when they had such an important mission to go on.
The SwinnDell sisters couldn't thank Bravado enough. They had already said the words at least fifty times each, and now they were buying the tea for him. Bravado could get used to this hero gig.
"And then we thought, you know, as long as Mareton's unconscious, why not mess him up a bit while we can?" Swinn said.
"So we reattached all the legs incorrectly and put his head on sideways," Dell said.
"And then we had a good laugh and offered to try and put him back, but Mareton didn't trust us."
"So he just hacked our horns off and blackmailed us."
"It was soooo traumatizing!" Swinn sobbed.
"Mareton's just a slimeball," Bravado said, finishing the last of the Marabian tea. "Let's not talk about him anymore. It's a moot point."
"Now we just need to figure out where to look for him next," Dell said.
"Not a problem," Bravado said. "If I know the pony you mean, then the one thing I know about him for sure is his love of shopping. He's a collector of knives of all kinds. And he loves specialty blades- rare blades, antique blades, enchanted blades. Way I see it, the place he'll want to be this time of year is Kirella's market."
"What's that?" Dell asked, blinking.
"It's the place you go to sell and buy things that are not quite legal," Bravado said. "The way I understand it, Doctor Zerato is… not quite legal himself. Not to mention that its technically illegal for private citizens to trade in hypodermic needles. And Kirella's market is only open once a month- today. So that would be where I'd start."
"Okay, let's get going, then." Swinn stood up.
"Ahem," the overly-attentive waiter said.
Swinn took a look at the waiter and slowly sat down. "Right. The check." She fished around in her pocket. "That's funny, I was sure I..." She gasped dramatically. "My money! It's all gone!"
"Oh, no!" Dell said. "Mine is gone too! Some thief must have pickpocketed us!"
"Yeah," Swinn snarled. "Like Sebastius Mareton…"
"I still have some coins," Bravado said. "Don't worry about it. I'll pay for it." He handed a few bits to the waiter.
"Oh, thank you," Swinn said. "I thought you'd get mad, because we did offer to pay for it…"
"You've been hanging around jerks like Mareton too much," Bravado said. "We need to get going. There's only so much time to register as a seller."
There was a pause. "Wait, why are we registering as sellers?" Dell asked.
"Most of the business in Kirella's market is conducted with a minimum of verbal communication," Bravado said. "Two buyers suddenly stopping to talk would be inordinately suspicious. Our doctor will no doubt go as a buyer, and so we would need to be sellers. It's the only way communication is possible. Kirella's market isn't just a place you go to buy material goods- secret information changes hooves all the time as well."
"But what are we selling?" Swinn asked.
"What you usually sell," Bravado said. "Cheap pots marketed as ancient urns. Contraptions of tin marketed as valuable weapons. The usual."
"Some of those are genuine artifacts, you know," Swinn said.
"But the ponies in Kirella's market won't be easy enough to fool!" Dell said at nearly the same time.
They looked at each other in distress over their broken psychic link. They usually didn't contradict each other like this.
"The point isn't to make money, silly girls," Bravado said.
The two mares stared at him in genuine shock.
"The point is to find your surgeon and get your horns back so that then you can make money," Bravado said.
The SwinnDell sisters recovered from their shock somewhat.
"Sure, sounds good," Dell said.
"Then let's get going." Bravado polished off the few dregs left in his teacup, then dropped it on the table with a clatter. One thing he adored about eating out was that somepony else got to do the dishes.
"So where do we find this market?" Swinn asked.
Bravado thought about it for a second. He'd only managed to get there two times himself, and both times he'd had friends to guide him there.
Once that friend had been Azure Lightning.
"I know they change codes a lot," he said. "We shouldn't be talking too loudly."
"Oh, okay," Swinn said. "Let's, uh, sneak into some alley somewhere?"
"That'll do just fine," Bravado said, ducking into one of the overly plentiful alleys that littered Marabia for the sake of plot convenience. "So, the sign that marked Kirella's market last time was a pair of cut gemstones viewed from above- the ponies you need to contact to learn more will have those as a fake cutie mark or as a sign on their shop or something."
"Go on," Swinn said from somewhere behind him.
Bravado glanced around the alley a bit, making sure nopony was nearby. "I do know a zebra who is connected to Kirella's market. Name of Hegera. He usually runs a jewelry shop as a cover job, has his name right on the door, very well-known and reputable. Many ponies have no clue about the activities he engages in every month, and even if they did, Hegera is loaded, and it's common knowledge that the Marabian guards will let off any criminal at all if they have enough money. They believe that wealth is a sign of favor from the gods or some… thing…" Bravado turned around and suddenly found himself alone in the alley.
"Uh, girls?" he said.
No answer.
"Swinn? Dell? Girls?" Bravado started forward.
Both sisters skidded into view. Each was holding her horn in her mouth. A rope was magically levitating in front of them.
"What-"
That was as far as Bravado got. The rope shot forward, wrapping around his legs and mouth and flipping him upside down.
"Got him good," Swinn said, dropping her horn into one of her hooves. "It's good to be linked."
Swinn and Dell gave each other a brohoof, then tucked their horns back in their pockets.
"Talk to you soon," Dell said as she put hers away.
"Very, very soon," Swinn said.
"Dibs on the hat," Dell said, picking up Bravado's beloved fedora. She plopped it on her head and smiled cockily. "How do I look?"
"Wonderful, darling," Swinn said.
Then the two girls ripped Bravado's cargo vest off and started going through the pockets.
Bravado burned with indignation as he thrashed against the ropes. But they were magically knotted. There was no way he would be able to loosen them without any magic of his own. He'd need something to cut them with. So he started looking for sharp objects.
"Nice baubles," Swinn said. "And they're genuine, too. Think how easy these will sell."
The girls were admiring the artifacts from his pockets. His artifacts. They were going to sell his artifacts.
The worst part was that Bravado had been planning to sell them himself. He was going to let the girls sell them for him. That was why he was into archeology: to make money. The SwinnDell sisters had been hanging around the likes of Daring Do too much; Daring Do was a real stickler for making sure that artifacts only went to museums, even if that meant giving them away for free. Bravado had nothing against museums, he just was willing to sell them to a private owner if they paid more money. He'd been planning to sell his artifacts on Kirella's market even before he got mixed up with Swinn and Dell, and now those two backstabbers…
He ground his teeth with anger.
"Ooh, bits," Dell said. "Goody."
"I think that's all we need," Swinn said, tossing Bravado's cargo vest aside. "We've got our merchandise, and we've got money."
"Are you sure we didn't forget something?" Dell asked.
"Why?" Swinn said as she started out of the alley.
"I dunno, something keeps nagging at me…"
Bravado couldn't see the girls as they trotted out of sight to peek around outside the alley, but he did hear what happened next.
"Hey, pretty ladies!" a pony called in Marabian. "How would you like some pretty necklaces?"
There was a frozen silence.
"That's what I forgot…" Dell whispered.
"We don't speak Marabian!" Swinn screamed, banging her head on the alley wall.
"No need to shout," the vendor grumbled in Marabian. From the hoofstomps, Bravado assumed the pony had left.
For a while, the only sound was Swinn muttering to herself. Bravado couldn't make out the words.
Hopefully, the girls would decide to untie him, but then again that was improbable. Still, if they did, would Bravado ask for their help again?
This wasn't fair; he couldn't compete with unicorns. He usually carried around an amulet that blocked magic, but he'd been worried about getting it past Marabian customs for this trip. How could anypony expect him to do so much as hold his own when other ponies could bend reality to their will, and all he had was his hooves and his brain?
Bravado had gone into adventure archeology, partly because his dad had done it, partly because he loved the adrenaline rush, partly for the money. But there was another reason, a reason he would never admit to the likes of Daring Do. A reason that he didn't even want to admit to himself.
Once, he'd been working with a team of researchers. He was barely more than a colt, and was just getting started doing archeology, although he'd gotten his cutie mark already. They'd been sorting some very fragile porcelain jars that had been steeped in magic so that they held whatever was put in them, no matter how large. Bravado had been carrying too many, and he fell and smashed one with his body. Suddenly the spell was broken, and all the energy that the unicorns had poured into that jar rushed out all at once into the closest living vessel- Bravado himself. The sudden surge had disoriented him, and afterwards he had severe burns on his body. He'd nearly died. Obviously not an experience he cared to repeat.
And yet, for just a moment, between when the vase broke, and the magic had left him, there had been one moment, while the power had still been in his body, that everything had felt different. His body felt almost electric, not like he was dying, but rather like he'd been infused with so much life that he could barely contain it. Like he suddenly was filled to bursting with… potential.
It had felt good.
So, so, so good.
And so, no matter what reason he gave for the way of life he chose to live, deep within his subconscious, usually so deep that he didn't even put it into words, was the glimmer of hope that, before he had to hand the artifact of awesome power to his client, he'd somehow find an excuse to use it for himself. To once more feel the power surging through him, and feel like he had the ability to do anything with just a little spell.
But he could never admit these things. Not even to himself. Because if he truly was in the archeology business just for the power trips, that would make him like…
"Hiiiiiii, girls," a familiar voice cooed.
"Mareton!" both girls screamed with fury.
Bravado began twisting around, until he finally got a good look at Swinn, Dell, and Sebastius Mareton. Mareton was still wearing that stupid black cloak.
"What are you doing here?" Swinn shouted.
"What do you want?" Dell echoed.
"Me?" Mareton's voice just oozed innocence. "Why, nothing. I just happened to be in the area and couldn't help but notice that you are, once again, deprived of a translator, because, like many novices, you forgot the first rule of backstabbing: always make sure, before you stab someone in the back, that you won't ever need that pony's services again."
"Get lost, Sebastius," Swinn snarled.
"Why?" Sebastius said. "The way I see it, we both need each other. I speak Marabian, and I would be willing to help you sell goods at Kirella's market, which most professional translators won't do- at least not for that pitiful amount of bits that you're carrying. And I, on the other hoof…" Mareton slowly lowered himself to his knees and gave the girls a pleading expression. "I'm at your mercy, here. I can't live like this anymore. I need the help of your precious doctor. Please."
Mareton had somehow managed to make his pleading expression sarcastic. Bravado was almost impressed.
The SwinnDell sisters exchanged anxious glances.
"I'm sick and tired of all these setbacks," Swinn sighed. "You win, Mareton. But we'll be keeping all four eyes on you."
"Not fair," Mareton said, pointing to where one of his eyes used to be. "It's four against one!"
"Ha ha ha," Dell said. "Now take us to Kirella's market."
"Hold up, girls. You aren't really going to leave Bravado alone in this alley, tied up and an easy target for thieves, are you?"
"We already stole everything he's carrying," Swinn said. "Nice try, Mareton."
"But someone might come along and untie him if you aren't here to watch him," Sebastius Mareton continued. "We'd better take him with us. Just in case."
"Oh, sure," Swinn said. "Like nopony is going to notice us dragging a tied-up pony behind us."
"If you would help me out of my cloak," Sebastius said, "then I know for a fact that you can use a duplication spell on something as simple as this. It'll hide his legs, and if you'd loosen his ropes just a bit, he'll be able to walk or at least hop behind us at a fair pace. We'll be just fine."
Bravado gritted his teeth at the thought of hopping all the way from this alley to Kirella's market. Maybe Daring Do's friend Coco Pie liked to get around that way, but Bravado wasn't sure he was that physically fit.
Sebastius Mareton grabbed the rope around Bravado's mouth and yanked him to his hooves. "Who knew a pony's worst day could change to a pony's very best day so fast?" Mareton whispered in Bravado's ear with a chuckle.
Who knew it also worked the other way around? Bravado thought.
Bravado was flung to the ground while the girls and Sebastius Mareton waited in line to sign up. The sellers were registering in an old forest outside of town, where the thick branches hid them from the sight of the winged zebra guards who occasionally flew by.
"Now, girls," Sebastisus said, "let me take this opportunity to explain Kirellian etiquette. First rule: Don't talk to anyone. Actually, let's make that rule into: I do all the talking. Even if the customer speaks a little Equestrian."
"What?" Swinn said. "Do you think we're stupid?"
"Yes," Mareton said. "I meant I do all the talking to the customers. You can discuss prices with me all you want, but I am your mediator. That's because I know all those subtle rules for talking to thieves in Marabia that you can't possibly have picked up on and I can't possibly explain in ten minutes."
"I don't trust you," Swinn pouted.
"Too bad. Learn Marabian next time," Sebastius said. "Now, the next part of Kirellian etiquette: no touching anything at all. Except the ground. And even that, you should be careful about. Touching any wares makes you a thief, and in Kirella's market, they hack your hoof off first and say 'Stop, thief!' afterwards. Thirdly, keep your expression as blank as you can manage. These ponies offend easily, even if you don't say a word, and you'd do well to be polite. That means that you, Swinn, need to figure out a way to reign in your magnificent temper."
"Oh, you little-" Swinn alternated between baring her teeth and frowning deeply as she attempted to hold back her screams of rage. Then, in an icy tone, she said, "I can keep calm when I need to, Sebastius Mareton."
"Yeah, but you'll have to manage to calm down in less than two minutes," Mareton said, checking an imaginary watch.
"That wasn't two minutes, you- you-" Swinn quivered with rage, then she turned away and glared at the ground.
The last ponies moved out of the way, and Mareton dragged Bravado to the front of the line, where a zebra with a horn, glasses and a cold, hard look was writing in a book with an elaborate purple quill.
"Wares?" the zebra asked in Marabian, lowering his glasses slightly to watch the newcomers.
Bravado had no doubt in his mind that those glasses were enchanted somehow. Probably to give the wearer X-ray vision. It was the only explanation to why he always seemed to look over them and rarely through them. Plus that was just standard fare for thieves markets.
Mareton patiently described each of the artifacts he had in Marabian, assuring the zebra that he wouldn't use any of the more dangerous ones on him. Not that that would build up any trust between them.
"And him?" the zebra asked, pointing straight at Bravado. "Who is that? Your brother?"
Bravado felt like screaming at the zebra. No, for the last time, he was not related to Sebastius Mareton!
But Sebastius just smiled. "Yes," he said emphatically. "He is."
"And is he for sale, then?" the zebra asked, his lips twitching into a smile.
"Of course," Sebastius said. "What are brothers for?"
Bravado felt cold. Duh, he thought. There was a slave trade in Marabia, though it was one of those technically illegal things that's hard to enforce. He'd heard lots of horror stories of ponies who'd been kidnapped by zebras and made to serve in the fields. So that was why Sebastius Mareton had been so keen to bring him along.
He didn't panic, but he began thinking of a way out much more seriously than before.
"Normally we don't get ponies on our market," the zebra said, brushing his chin with his quill pen. "But that's more because our location makes it inconvenient to drag huge quantities of slaves here, and not many would register on our market for a single captive. However, you are hardly the first creature who wanted to sell a relative at our establishment. The fact that you would do this to your own brother suggests you are quite the backstabber."
That was a hard call. Was the zebra hinting that he now no longer trusted Mareton and wouldn't let him in, or was he saying that now he did trust Mareton since Mareton had admitted how untrustworthy he was right up front?
It must have been the latter, from the way the zebra finished filling out the form. "Do you care to give any other information?" he asked.
"Say I'm with the SwinnDell sisters," Mareton said. Of course Mareton wouldn't want to use his own name, Bravado thought. Mareton had tons of enemies in Marabia, and some of them would be at Kirella's market. On the other hand, the girls couldn't possibly have made any enemies if they'd hadn't even been here long enough to pick up any language. So their name was safe enough.
"Hey!" Swinn shouted, whirling Mareton around to face her. "I heard you say our name. What are you saying about us? You aren't selling us out are you?"
"I was just telling them to put your name on the stall! Sheesh," Mareton said, shaking his head. Then he winced and stopped.
"You'd better be a good salespony," Dell muttered.
"Just you watch," Mareton said.
This, Bravado reflected, was a very good study of honor amongst thieves.
So far as he could tell, Mareton had cheated Swinn and Dell three times, Swinn and Dell had cheated Mareton once, and two separate customers had cheated Mareton and the SwinnDell sisters. And that was only the successful scams. Bravado had lost count of the number of times that the various ponies had tried to con each other, only for their ploy to be noticed by somepony or another. And there had been brief exchange of blows (or more like slaps) between Swinn and Mareton before Dell had pleaded with them to cut it out before they killed each other.
And nopony had asked to buy him yet. That was a good sign.
Okay, one zebra had asked if he was for sale, but that was a matter of curiosity. And then he'd shrugged and said, "The offer is tempting, but I only just bought some young stallions recently, and they're only just broken. I don't need another hot-blooded one giving them hope to fight back."
Bravado, meanwhile, had found a sharp piece of glass, and he'd been rubbing his ropes against that piece of glass whenever Mareton and the SwinnDell sisters turned their backs. That didn't happen nearly often enough for his liking, but it would work if he had enough time.
"I don't even think this is real," one customer was saying in Marabian, examining a ruby carved into a star shape. That had been one of Bravado's finds. He tried to conceal his rage as he slid his hooves back and forth, back and forth, drawing the rope across the broken glass.
"It's real," Sebastius replied in Marabian. "Can't you tell by the way the light catches it?"
The unicorn customer levitated the ruby up to his face.
"Hey!" Swinn said, snatching the ruby from midair and slamming it on the table. "You can't just steal our-"
"Pardon my lame-brained assistant," Sebastius Mareton said in Equestrian. To Swinn he said, "He's just checking it. Why would I let him just make off with our gemstone?"
"Ahem?" Swinn said, shooting daggers at Mareton. "We're the ones who found this ruby, not you."
"But you couldn't sell it if not for me," Mareton said.
"Stop!" Dell screamed, lunging at the unicorn customer with a knife. He had been making his getaway while Swinn and Mareton were distracted.
Bravado laughed softly to himself as Swinn and Mareton each tried to find a way to blame the other for what happened.
"You pathetic little unicorn," a horned zebra hissed as he walked up. "I would expect better from a magic-user."
Sebastius twitched one ear. Bravado suspected his unicorn-supremacist-radar was going off.
The horned zebra whirled around and rested both hooves on the counter, causing all three ponies to jump back. "What do you have?" he said in a slithery voice.
"What does he want?" Dell half-shrieked.
"Just a customer," Mareton whispered to her in Equestrian. Then he spoke to the zebra in Marabian. "We have a few fine artifacts here. This gemstone is-"
"Who is that behind the counter?" The zebra interrupted with a bored voice.
Sebastius did a double take, and Bravado quickly stopped moving his hooves and prayed that Sebastius couldn't see the glass piece. "O-oh, you mean my brother, Bravado Mareton?"
Bravado felt like he would gag when he heard that combination name.
"Don't tell me that he's for sale," the horned zebra said.
"Why not?" Sebastius said. "You don't think you could use a fine stallion like him to help you out?"
The zebra stared at Mareton for a moment. Then his lips twitched into a smile.
"You seem to have no morals at all, sir," he said, as though that were a compliment.
Sebastius took it like one. "Thank you. I'm proud to be a sociopath."
"Would that I had ten ponies like you, sir," the zebra said. "I have such issues with my… workers. We come so close to finishing a job. We must stop short, because somebody wants to come clean, or won't hurt a female, or won't kill a child. It causes such delay. Ruins many a well laid plan."
"Hate to break it to you," Sebastius Mareton said, "but I'm afraid I'm not looking for a job at the moment. However, give me a few days and I could look you up. But on the other hand, I have a similarly-built but unfortunately non-sociopathic pony right here, waiting for purchase." He held out Bravado so that the zebra could get a good look at him.
"Ah, he looks strong," the zebra said. "I could use him as a… worker, perhaps?"
"Good luck with that," Sebastius said. "You know the type. Principled. Strict moral code."
"We will see how long those hold up," the zebra said. "I have broken many ponies before, and if nothing else I could use his help in my diamond mines."
That was a subtle way of letting slip that he had plenty of money. If he was willing to let Sebastius charge a high price, this zebra must really want Bravado as a slave.
Bravado managed to keep from shivering. He reminded himself that he'd gotten out of tougher scrapes before; surely he'd have an opportunity to escape at some point. Yeah. He could take care of himself.
"How much?" the zebra asked.
Since he'd revealed that he was rich already, that was an indication that he was okay paying a high price.
"I don't think you can carry the amount of jangles I would prefer," Sebastius said. "Not unless they have started making jangles of higher denomination since I was here last."
"Would you prefer your payment in diamonds?" the zebra asked.
"Show me," Mareton said.
The zebra pulled a clear, well-cut diamond from his jacket pocket. It was of a fair size, about the size of a bit coin.
"Will you take five of these?" the zebra asked.
"Better make it six," Mareton said. "We'll need to split it three ways."
"Done," the zebra said.
"Ooh," Swinn cooed when she saw the diamond. "I didn't know we had anything worth that much!"
Bravado was almost impressed how much the zebra was willing to pay for him.
"Yeah," Sebastius Mareton said. "I had no idea Bravado was so valuable."
"Wait, what?" Dell said. "You- you aren't selling him are you?"
"Why not?" Mareton said.
"Well, Swinn, he did save our horns for us…" Dell whispered.
Swinn paused. "Yeah, you're right. We can't just betray him like that."
"The zebra is willing to pay four of these lovely gemstones for him," Mareton said.
Swinn and Dell gasped, and their eyes bugged out. Bravado could practically see the bit symbols in their eyes.
"Done!" they cried in unison.
"Thank you kindly," Sebastius said. Then he added to the zebra in Marabian, "Just slip two of those lovely diamonds under the table where I can grab them… there… just like that. Leave the other four on the table."
Swinn and Dell pounced on the diamonds as soon as they saw them. Their eyes gleamed with greed as they surveyed their glittering prizes.
Sebastius dragged Bravado around the table and handed the end of one rope to the zebra. "He hops pretty well if you don't feel like dragging him like a sled," he said.
"Thank you very much," the horned zebra said. "This has been a most pleasant meeting, mister…?"
"Doctor, actually. Doctor Zerato."
Sebastius and his customer whirled around quickly. Somehow, an abada had snuck up on them. Unlike most buyers, he was wearing a white lab coat instead of the identity-concealing black cloaks.
The horned zebra started to speak. Doctor Zerato merely pressed his black-gloved hoof against the horned zebra's chest, and the zebra's words turned into a small whimper.
"That earth pony," Doctor Zerato said, "is an incredible specimen of its kind, and you want to ruin him by forcing him to slave away in a diamond mine?"
The zebra collapsed on the ground, blood flowing from his chest. His eyes remained open.
Bravado's eyes bugged out. This wasn't what he'd expected from Swinn and Dell's miracle doctor.
From the matching bugged eye on Mareton's face, he hadn't been expecting this either. And judging from the feminine gasps, neither had Swinn and Dell.
"Why did you have to do that?" Dell said. "We would have let you have Bravado… er…"
Doctor Zerato shifted his shoulders and pulled his black hoof-glove on straight. When he spoke, it was in Equestrian- perfect, accent-less Equestrian. "My apologies, gentlemares. I probably should have waited to kill him so that you didn't have to watch that. But when one has absolute power over life and death, one gets slightly careless." He smiled at Sebastius Mareton, who was blinking especially hard to try and de-bug his remaining eye.
I do that, too, Bravado thought with a jolt.
"And who is your friend?" Doctor Zerato asked Swinn and Dell.
Swinn and Dell both opened their mouths indignantly, but Sebastius made slashing motions at them.
"I am Sebastius Mareton," he said. "And this is my brother, Bravado."
"Oh!" Doctor Zerato said, his eyes widening. "Ah. Now that you mention it, I do see the resemblance." He stroked Bravado's chin, which made Bravado flinch backwards. Get your hooves off me, you murderer!
"Such a fine earth pony," Doctor Zerato said. "Ever since I saw him selling his wares, I longed to cut him open and see if his insides were as well-formed as the outside."
"We'll give him to you," Swinn blurted out. "Free gift."
Bravado felt like he'd been dumped into a chest of ice.
"But you…" Doctor Zerato brushed Mareton's hood off his face and examined the cut on his neck. "What the hay happened to you?"
"Can I speak to you in private?" Sebastius Mareton asked the doctor in Marabian. "I have to tell you something important about those girls that you think are so trustworthy."
"Talk in Equestrian," Swinn snapped.
"Oops," Sebastius said in Equestrian.
"No, no," the doctor said in Equestrian. "I'm impressed that he speaks the language so well. Let's see what else you know." Then he switched to Marabian. "I don't understand. Did those girls do this to you? With my potion?"
"These girls are professional con artists," Sebastius replied in Marabian. "I fell for their tricks, too. They aren't interested in helping you become a rich and famous doctor- they just want to become doctors for themselves, using your medicine."
"What?" Doctor Zerato said, looking shocked.
"What are you saying?" Dell demanded.
"He's quizzing me on the Marabian gods," Sebastius said in Equestrian. "Friendly talk."
Suspicious expressions made their appearance on Swinn and Dell's faces.
"Not much time, they're on to us," Sebastius said. "Short version, they were using me as a test subject. You can see for yourselves what kind of doctors they make. But they ran out of potions doing so. They were planning on saving one so they can analyze its contents, but now they can't. They're going to try and con you into giving them more potion. Don't do it. For both of our sakes, don't do it."
The doctor started at Sebastius Mareton for a while. Then he grinned broadly and turned to the girls.
"You have picked up quite an intelligent young earth pony here," he said. "A most excellent guide. So, why have you not returned to Equestria yet? Is there some service I can render? Do you need your potion stock replenished?"
"Oh, that would be good," Dell said. "But could you also-"
"No," Doctor Zerato said, pressing a black gloved hoof to each of their faces. He drew three long, bloody cuts across their cheeks- Swinn's right cheek, Dell's left cheek. Both girls screamed. Bravado's hat tumbled off Dell's head and into the dirt.
"Let that be a lesson to the two of you," the abada said. "Nopony ever cons Doctor Zerato. Nopony, and no one!"
And then Swinn and Dell did what they knew best how to do.
They ran away. They made a panicked run through the crowd at Kirella's market, shoving aside ponies, knocking down stands, and leaving a trail of mini-disasters in their wake.
"You sure know how to dish out violence," Mareton said with a note of respect.
Doctor Zerato pulled his black gloves on straight. Both of them were pretty torn, and Bravado could just barely make out the stolen griffin paws underneath.
"I owe you a lot, Sebastius Mareton," Doctor Zerato said, nodding to the earth pony. "You have impressed me greatly. You have managed to master both Marabian and Equestrian, and have managed to intelligently extract yourself from a dangerous situation. I have never taken on a personal assistant before, but I would be pleased to work with a pony like you."
"We are ponies of business," Sebastius said, keeping his tone emotionless. "Understand, my regular job pays very, very well, and has all manner of lovely perks. Mostly adrenaline related. So I hope you won't be offended if I ask… what can you offer me that nopony else can?"
"A simple question with a simple answer," Doctor Zerato said.
With a dramatic flourish, he tore off his white lab coat and spread his stolen griffin wings in their full glory. They were huge with many feathers, smooth and well kept. Doctor Zerato flew up into the air with them and smiled down on Sebastius Mareton, who watched with an expression of awe.
"What can I give you that nopony can?" Doctor Zerato asked. "Look upon my glory, Sebastius Mareton. I was once a regular horned zebra. But now I have risen above that. I am a self-made alicorn. And you? Why should I bestow a blessing of any less magnitude upon you?"
Sebastius looked deliriously happy.
"I can give you what you have always dreamed of: a horn, a pair of wings!" the doctor continued. "All the benefits that other creatures enjoy by right of birth shall be laid at your hooves! What can I give you that nopony else can, Sebastius Mareton? Only the opportunity of a lifetime, the chance that you always wished could be yours and yet never dared to hope could happen: the chance to rise to the level of a superior species!"
The smile fell off of Sebastius Mareton's face so fast that it defied the laws of gravity. "Come again?" he said, narrowing his eyes.
Doctor Zerato landed on the ground and folded his stolen wings to his sides. They were far too big for him. He smiled at Sebastius Mareton, apparently not understanding the expression of barely restrained rage on the earth pony's face.
"I'm giving you the chance to live as if you were a unicorn," Doctor Zerato said. He turned aside thoughtfully. "I mean, I've gotten the impression that the majority of earth ponies simply lack the intelligence to understand how pathetic and inferior they are compared to unicorns, but you… you seem unusually intelligent, considering your species. Perhaps as smart as a pegasus. I can't imagine how you can live with yourself, day after day, knowing that no matter how much you succeed, you will never rise to the level of a unicorn…"
Finally, Mareton snapped.
He seized the doctor by one hoof and swung him into the supporting pole of another stall. The pole cracked right in half, and Doctor Zerato banged his head against a table. The cloth awning collapsed on top of him.
Bravado rolled over to the doctor's discarded lab coat. If he knew the abada surgeon half as well as he thought he did, then he was sure to find something to cut his ropes in that coat.
Mareton had drawn his ice dagger and was stabbing Doctor Zerato. The knife cut through his flesh as if it was warm butter. Sebastius shouted at the doctor, digging the sharp dagger into him with every word.
"You-" STAB! "stupid-" STAB! "self righteous-" STAB! "bigoted-" STAB!
Bravado's mouth was tied shut pretty tight, but he managed to wrap his lips around a scapula's handle and drag it out of the pocket. Then he whipped his ropes across the blade. It was more effective than the shard of glass, and in a few seconds the rope parted.
Mareton finally dug the dagger into Doctor Zerato's neck. He left it there and surveyed his handiwork, breathing heavily. Cuts on his legs had reopened.
Bravado kicked his legs out to remove the remaining ropes, then untied the loop around his mouth. He tossed the whole bundle of ropes aside. First things first; he scooped up his hat and put it back on his head, where it belonged. Then he turned to Sebastius Mareton.
"Wow," he said. "I thought Doctor Zerato was the only pony who knew how to make that healing potion. How are you going to get yourself healed now?"
Sebastius Mareton's breathing caught for a second. Then he slowly, slowly turned around, little flames dancing in his eyes.
"What was that about not backstabbing a pony before making sure you don't need their services anymore?" Bravado asked, arching his eyebrows and smiling.
Mareton's lips curled back in a snarl. He was practically blowing smoke from his nostrils.
"Come and get it," Bravado smirked, pawing the ground.
Then something heavy hit Bravado in the side of the head. He collapsed into the dirt, and a net of ropes fell on top of him. The ropes were so heavy that Bravado was sure they'd left bruises. He could hardly lift his head.
"Ow…" Sebastius Mareton groaned nearby. The net had caught him too. Sebastius was bleeding in several places but not very heavily.
So many things had happened in so little time that it took Bravado a few seconds to understand what was going on. It was the guards. The Marabian Guards. It had to be. Swinn and Dell must've attracted their attention with their wild escape. And now Kirella's Market was being raided.
There was lots of shouting and stampeding and fighting going on, but Bravado couldn't see any of it because he was busy holding the dirt down with his nose. After what seemed like an eternity, the net was lifted slightly and a two rough sets of hooves dragged him out and tied him up. Hooray; more ropes.
Sebastius was still lying on the ground. He wasn't moving. Even after an abada guard pulled the net off of him, he didn't budge.
"What are we going to tell the captain?" the abada asked in a whiny voice.
"We'll tell him the truth," the winged zebra said. "That a haul of two prisoners is the most he can expect from two soldiers, and next time he should assign more guards to this patrol."
"I don't want to get fired…" the whiny abada said.
"Shut your trap."
"Wait, you aren't arresting me, are you?" said Bravado.
The two zebra guards just rolled their eyes at him.
"But- but you can't do that!" Bravado said. "I'm the victim here!"
"We can and will, lawbreaker," the abada said.
"But I didn't do anything!" Bravado said.
"I think this one's dead," the winged zebra said, kicking Mareton lightly.
Sebastius Mareton groaned.
"Oops, never mind," the winged zebra said. "Here, Zoltan, see if you can make him walk."
"I didn't do anything!" Bravado repeated.
Zoltan's horns glowed.
"Leave me alone, you (censored)," Mareton said. "I'll get up already!" With some effort, he pushed himself off the ground, then slowly fell over again.
"Do you think we can get these two prisoners to Dalquen's prison before dark?" the winged zebra asked.
"You'd better," somebody growled. An earth zebra stepped out behind a collapsed stall. His helmet with a star on it denoted him a captain.
"I didn't do anything!" Bravado cried again.
"Uh huh," the captain said. "Sure." He turned to the abada. "This is all you got, Zoltan? Two prisoners, one of whom can barely walk?"
The abada's horns glowed again, and Mareton was jerked up into the air and planted firmly on his hooves. "Er, well…"
"Forget it," the captain said. "I'll take what I can get. We will execute them in the prison theater tomorrow."
Bravado's face froze with horror.
"But I didn't DO anything!"
Bravado stared forlornly at the metal bars of the jail cell.
This was bad. Very, very bad.
Under other circumstances, Bravado might have considered the possibility of escape. The Marabian government was notoriously underfunded, with the rulers on top taking the lion's share of the taxpayers money to spend on lavish mansions while many government programs languished. But the Dalquen prison theater was no ordinary prison. A huge portion of government funds came from tourists and locals paying to watch criminals get executed, not to mention that many of the highest officials loved to watch the sports. To that end, the Dalquen prison had security that rivaled that of Tartarus. Guards, enchanted beasts, and magic wards kept the prisoners in and any potential rescuers out. Bravado would have been hard pressed to break out of his cell, never mind the compound.
What was worse, the Marabians believed that, if a prison show needed to happen and they didn't have any criminals to use for the show yet, the gods would send them a guilty pony for their entertainment purposes. Bravado had no hope of a trial. To protest his innocence at this point would be sacrilegious.
But he couldn't panic. He had to keep calm. Not because that would somehow help him escape; it wouldn't. He was going to die whether he panicked or not.
No, the reason he had to keep calm was that Sebastius Mareton was watching him.
Sebastius was taking the whole affair very well. He was lying on the cot, tapping one hoof against the foot of the bed, alternating between staring at the ceiling and staring at Bravado. He was waiting for Bravado to crack; he just knew it. Bravado had no intention of giving him that satisfaction.
In the cell across from them a group of earth ponies moped. There were four of them, all huge stallions with many scars. None of them had cutie marks despite their apparent adulthood; perhaps they were a gang of ex-slaves. They were going to be executed in a few hours.
"You two brothers?" one of them asked.
"Yes," Sebastius Mareton said.
"No," said Bravado, kicking Sebastius in the leg.
"Oh yes we are."
"Oh no we aren't."
"I'll prove it. What's your mother's name?"
"Ruby Rust," Bravado said.
"Same as mine."
"I think I'd remember if we grew up together," Bravado said.
"No you wouldn't. I'd have killed you before you were out of nursery school," Sebastius said.
"My point exactly."
"But my mom didn't stick around the house too long after I was born," Sebastius said, grinning evily. "I terrified her. She ran away because she thought I'd kill her in her sleep." He rubbed one hoof under his chin. "Probably not. That would have been too risky. But then, I admit, foals do stupid things."
"We're not related," Bravado said. "You made that up."
"You only wish," Sebastius said, giggling maniacally.
"Get your kicks while you can, Sebastius," Bravado said. "It'll only be for another day. And then you just know you're going to die first. No matter what game they want us to play, you'll lose. And I'll get the satisfaction of watching you die."
"How can you talk to your brother that way?" Sebastius said.
Bravado ignored him. It wasn't worth it anymore.
One more day. One more lousy day.
He rested his head on the bars.
He'd spent so much time travelling, and yet it felt like he had seen so little.
He thought of his mom, because Sebastius had brought it up. He hadn't seen her in… years. And even then, he'd only stopped by to drop off a birthday present and dashed off again. He wrote her letters, but he knew she missed him. And he wouldn't even get to say goodbye. With his job, Ruby Rust probably wouldn't even worry about him if she didn't hear from him for a month or two. When would she realize that he was gone for good? Would it be better for her to live in ignorance, in uncertainty? Would that be like breaking the news to her gradually?
And then he thought of Daring. Oh, Daring. He'd known her for such a long time. They'd flirted with each other for as long as Bravado could remember, but if she was here… he'd tell her to go ahead and move on. He'd tell her the truth. He'd tell her that even though he'd always admire her and cherish her friendship and wish she could be his, he could never love her in that special way, the way associated with The Power of Love, that deux ex machina in so many adventure novels that sometimes really happened in the real world. He loved her. But not with that kind of selfless passion.
She deserved the truth. If only she was here…
"Visitors for Bravado Mareton?" a guard said, escorting Daring Do, Storm Talon, Sandstorm and Desert Flower to his cell.
Scratch that.
"Ah, Ms. Do," Bravado said, giving the yellow Pegasus a dazzling smile. "You just have to follow me everywhere, don't you?"
"Bravado, don't," Daring Do said. "This is serious. If I hadn't seen your name on the prison theater program, I don't want to think about what would have happened to you."
"You think I don't know?" Bravado said. "Look, I have some money in a bank account with a branch nearby, and I have a few friends who might be willing to give me a loan…"
"Hold on," Sandstorm said, pulling out a notepad. "I'll write it all down."
Bravado carefully gave instructions for where to gather his bail money.
"I am eternally grateful to you, Ms. Do," Bravado said. "I owe you so much."
"Then you owe me an explanation," Daring Do said. "Why does the prison roster list you as 'Bravado Mareton'?"
Bravado sighed with aggravation. "Sebastius somehow thinks that we're brothers. I have no idea where he got that idea."
"Storm Talon!" Sebastius shouted from over on his cot. "Could you please tell Bravado what my mom's name was?"
There was a pause.
"I thought Bravado said you were dead," Storm Talon said bluntly. "Too bad he was wrong."
"Don't you know it," Sebastius said. "But this isn't a trick question, you know."
Storm Talon thought for a moment.
"Ruby Rust," he said after a moment. "But she didn't stick around very long. She left about seven or eight years after Sebastius was born. I… I think she did have… I know Rodolphus had another son, and Ruby Rust took the child with her when she left, but the colt's name wasn't Bravado. It was… Cornelius Mareton or something."
"Bravado was probably your middle name," Sebastius said nonchalantly. "Want to know what my middle name is?"
"Danger," Storm Talon said.
"You ruined the punchline," Sebastius growled.
"Really?" said Sandstorm. Desert Flower also looked surprised.
"But I think Bravado is unconvinced," Sebastius Mareton said. "Could you just describe what Ruby Rust looked like, if you don't mind?"
Storm Talon didn't answer for a moment.
"Bravado, you know I don't want to hurt you," he said.
"I…" Bravado swallowed. "I want to know."
Storm Talon studied Bravado's face closely.
"Dark gray," he said. "With a dark red mane and ruby red eyes."
Bravado's shoulders slumped. Everypony always said he looked so much like his mother.
"It is true, isn't it?" Storm Talon said.
"Hooray!" Sebastius Mareton said. "I was right! You were wrong! Let's have a happy family reunion!"
"Daring," Bravado said. "Get me out of this cell. Quickly. I have one day maximum."
"Understood," Daring Do said. "Don't worry, handsome."
"I won't, beautiful."
Bravado didn't know very much about his father.
It wasn't like his mom had tried to keep it secret, but she didn't like looking at pictures of him and so she'd thrown them all out. All Bravado had was a vague image in his memory. His dad had been an earth pony, not buff or bulky but still quite masculine. His coat was a medium blue, and his mane was golden and white in a longish style. It hadn't occurred to him that Sebastius looked similar. Sebastius had a much lighter coat- more of a dusty blue. Although come to think of it, that would be the color you'd get when you mixed his father's sky blue coat with his mother's gray coat. And Sebastius did have a long white mane. Both Bravado and Sebastius liked their manes and tails long. Bravado did it to look handsome. He had no idea why Sebastius did it.
The main thing he knew about his father was what he'd done. Ever since he was little, Ruby Rust had told him fantastic stories about the valuable treasures that he'd gone after, and the brave things he'd done. None of them had been in much detail. Ruby Rust had known his father for about a year before they were married, and soon after she had a son and wanted to stay home. He'd only taken her along on three trips total.
Those stories had been Bravado's favorites. He'd asked to hear them every bedtime, until he'd memorized them and could recite them along with Ruby Rust.
"Your father was very brave," Ruby Rust would say. "And very smart. And very kind. His heart… was just too big for him."
Bravado had assumed for a long time that that meant his dad had died of a heart attack or something. His mom hated talking about his dad's death. She always said a colt didn't need to worry about it, and Bravado had just stopped asking.
"How did your father die?" he asked Sebastius.
"Sorry," Sebastius said. "Can't answer that. Change your pronoun and try again."
Bravado banged his head lightly against the cell bars. His hat fell off, but he didn't care very much.
"How did our father die?" he said.
Sebastius swung his back hoof up and down a few times before answering.
"Stabbed," he said. "One of his fellow explorers. They'd recovered an artifact of mass destruction. Rodolphus Mareton wanted it destroyed instantly. But one explorer wanted to destroy all the Buckzi first."
Bravado snorted. "I can sympathize." The Buckzi had been the ruling party of Germeneigh for decades. They put unicorn supremacist theories into practice. Daring Do and Bravado had clashed with them several times, because the Buckzi agents were always on the lookout for powerful artifacts to use to conquer the world and 'put the other races in their place'.
"Tell me about it," Sebastius said. "I wish Rodolphus had just handed the artifact over to the army. It would have made everything so much easier. But his bleeding heart wouldn't give in. And so his heart bled. All over the kitchen floor." Sebastius shifted position. "I was seven. I watched it happen."
Bravado didn't really know how to respond. "I would say I'm sorry to hear it. But you probably loved watching it, didn't you?"
"What the hay?" Sebastius sat up abruptly. "What? You think that just because I didn't cry, I was somehow happy about it? Yeah, right. That was the worst day of my life. You know why? Because less than a month later, the state sent me to a nut house. That's why. Do you know what they did to me there? Do you know what happened to the foals who were sent there?" He pointed to a round scar near his ear. It was so small Bravado had never noticed it before. "You know how I got these?" He pointed to a matching one near his other ear. "That's where they attach the wires. For the new and unimproved electric shock therapy."
"Come on," Bravado said. "They couldn't have- I thought that was banned."
"It was used far more recently than most ponies think," Sebastius said. "And the main reason it got banned was because of that poorly maintained sanitarium. One colt was electrocuted to death."
"You're lying," Bravado said.
"No way. And then you know what? The next day, they strapped another foal into the machine without bothering to fix it. And they electrocuted her to death, too."
"Pull the other one," Bravado said.
"I thought they were just going to murder us all one by one," Sebastius said. "That's what I'd do if I ran a sanitarium. Not that I would want to run one. Contrary to popular belief, even I have standards. But I was scheduled to receive therapy the next day, and I was a nervous wreck. Couldn't sleep for fear it was my last night alive. I learned a very valuable lesson that day."
"What lesson was that?" Bravado asked. What the hay. Let's just play along.
"If you're going to murder an annoying roommate by sabotaging a piece of equipment, make sure that the machine will be fixed before you have to use it."
There was silence.
"You know what?" Bravado said. "Thank you, Sebastius."
"For what?"
"I was struggling not to feel pity for you," Bravado said. "You've just made it easy."
"Well it wasn't like they'd fixed the machine yet," Sebastius said. "I apparently have built up a really high electrical tolerance as a side effect of being zapped every week for several years. If Celestia's lame-brained guards ever catch me, I hope they try to execute me by electric chair, and then I can claim double jeopardy and go free."
"Double jeopardy doesn't work that way," Bravado said. "You aren't sentenced to receive a shock from an electric chair; you're sentenced to be killed by the electric chair. So they can jack the voltage higher and electrocute you as many times as are necessary until you die." He thought a bit. "Daring will get me out in the morning. Too bad I'm strapped for cash right now, or I'd love to watch your demise."
"Careful, Bravado," Sebastius Mareton said. "You're starting to sound like me."
A guard walked past at that moment and rattled the bars of the cell of the four muscular earth ponies.
"Thirty more minutes until show time," he said. "And the hornets are plenty angry."
One of the earth ponies whimpered.
"Next time you'll think twice before stealing from a temple," the guard said with a smirk.
He marched off.
Another earth pony sighed and turned to face the others.
"All right, stallions," he said. "We've had a good run. Done lots of great things. And I'm proud to know you. And now we will go down with dignity."
"I hate hornets," the earth pony who'd whimpered said. "Why couldn't we have gotten executed during the month of the plant god?"
"They would have just used a giant Venus Flytrap or something," another earth pony said. "I hate carnivorous plants."
"I hate death," the last earth pony said.
"We all do," the apparent leader said. He sighed and turned to face the cell door. "But now it's over," he whispered.
The guard came back, bringing six other guards. "Ready?" he said, unlocking the cell door.
"Ready," the earth ponies all said. They stood up and marched behind the first guard, between the other guards.
"That'll be you tomorrow," Bravado whispered to Mareton.
"I've got a whole day to live," Sebastius said. "That's plenty of time to come up with a plan to-"
"Wait! Wait!"
One of the guards turned around in surprise. A little colt dashed up the corridor and collapsed at the guard's hooves, dropping a heavy sack and panting heavily.
"That's that colt again!" Sebastius Mareton said. "That worthless, money-grubbing guide."
"That colt who sold me your artifacts," Bravado said.
"That little sneak!"
"What?" the guard asked.
"Th- the god-" the colt took a deep breath. "The g-god of… the god…"
"Here," another guard said, breaking formation and handing the colt a canteen.
The colt took a long drink. He was still having trouble breathing, but he launched into his story. "The god of lightning… has seen fit… t-to pardon these criminals, and has blessed me with… riches abundant… for their… release." He emptied the purse on the floor. Many of the coins were jangles, but many were bits.
"Those are my bits!" Bravado and Sebastius cried in unison.
All the guards broke formation to count the huge pile of coins. After some bickering, one guard said, "All the money is accounted for. The god of lightning has spoken. These criminals shall go free."
The leader of the earth pony gang rushed up to the colt and scooped him into a tight hug.
"Can I join your gang now?" the colt asked.
"Sure, sure," the leader said, nuzzling the colt affectionately. "Whatever you say, big guy." He set the colt on his shoulders. Then all the earth ponies in the gang headed for the door, escorted by two guards.
"So long suckers," the colt told Bravado and Sebastius as he passed them. "Hope you find your own luck."
The remaining four guards whispered frantically to each other. Bravado strained to hear what they were saying.
"Now what?" one said. "Those were for today's entertainment. We have ten minutes to find replacements for them."
"Do we have any other criminals?"
"Who's next on the roster?"
One guard pulled out a clipboard. He flipped a couple of pages.
"Sebastius and Bravado Mareton," he said.
The guards glanced at each other.
"All right," the guard with the clipboard said. "Get those two out there. We're on in ten."
"W-wait, what?" Bravado said, scooting back until he touched the cot. Sebastius leapt to his hooves.
The guards opened the door and came in.
"B-but you can't- I can't-" Bravado rushed to the corner.
Sebastius fell heavily to the floor. Two guards dragged him roughly out of the cell. The other two converged on Bravado.
"No!" Bravado shouted as they grabbed him with the hooves. "You can't do this now- I'll have money tomorrow, I promise!"
"Tomorrow isn't good enough," the guards said as they dragged him down the hall. "We need a show now."
Bravado made a token attempt to dig his hooves into the ground. As though that would delay the inevitable by more than a few seconds.
"This can't be happening," he whimpered to himself.
