Author's Note: ohmygosh you guys, I am SO sorry to make you wait for this chapter! It took much longer than expected to get it posted, and I hope to avoid that kind of thing again. But these things happen, and it's here now, and it is another epic one, so I hope you'll think the wait was worth it. A HUGE thanks to my beta, TheMayorOfBlondeVille, for all her dedication and hard work.
Buckle your seat belts, kids, cause this shit's about to get real.
Katniss is an amazing kisser. She discovered a little while ago that we could kiss with our mouths open, and since then I've been intoxicated by the taste of her as we explore each other with our tongues. I know it's weird to say that I enjoy how she tastes, but it's true. It's slightly sweet, and minty like the tea she drinks after dinner.
We managed to escape another party tonight, and made our way to the roof the first chance we got. It's less windy up here tonight, and so we were able to take a better look around, and discovered a little garden on the other side.
That's where we've been sitting for the last hour or so, practically sucking each other's faces off.
It's been incredible.
I feel her adjust her position, angling her body toward me more, and as she does this, her hand drops and accidentally lands near my crotch. It's only for a split second, but I realize she's brushed up against my erection.
She knows it as well, because her eyes fly open and she quickly backs away.
"Oh! Gah, I'm sorry," she apologizes, her cheeks turning red.
Maybe because it's so absurd, or maybe because she's so adorable when she's embarrassed, but I actually start laughing at the whole situation. How silly of her to be uncomfortable about it. I mean, doesn't she realize it's a good thing?
On second thought, maybe she doesn't. We still haven't had that talk.
"It's okay, really," I tell her as I get my laughter under control, taking her hand in mine. "I know it was an accident, but, I mean… It's okay. It's what we're building up to, right?"
"Um—" she stammers, her hand squeezing mine nervously. "I guess…"
"Katniss, what do you know about this kind of stuff?" I ask her seriously.
She makes a point to look at me as she answers, "Well… I'm not clueless, if that's what you mean. I have watched the Games."
"You know I didn't mean it like that," I say softly. "I mean, besides learning from watching the Games, I kind of know what to do from my brothers. And I was wondering how you know what to do."
She stares off in another direction, chewing on her nail and pondering my question. I can see her blushing slightly as she continues to think about it. Finally, she looks back at me.
"Well, I know some of what to do from Madge Undersee."
Really? The sweet, quiet mayor's daughter? I had sometimes seen her sitting with Katniss at lunch, but I never thought much about her besides that. Then again, there must be a reason she's not here.
Katniss can see the confusion in my expression, and elaborates, "She pair bonded with Brock Rosen. They've had a fling going on for years. I guess if you've never been to the slagheap, you wouldn't know. They were there all the time, and she'd tell me some of what they did there, and gave me some pointers for when the time comes."
"Wow, I never would've thought…" I remark, and I can see hesitation on her face. "What is it?" I ask.
She shakes her head and replies, "Oh, no. It's nothing."
"Tell me. Please?"
"Well… it's not something I've told anyone before."
I stay silent and instead squeeze her hand gently, reassuring her with my touch that she can trust me and shouldn't be embarrassed or scared to tell me anything.
She tries and fails to look me in the eye as she tells me, "I also, um, know what to do for, uh… myself. Sometimes if Prim ended up in our mother's bed, I would…"
She doesn't need to finish that sentence. I can fill in the blanks. And as I picture the image in my head—Katniss quietly trying to get herself off as her mother and sister sleep soundly nearby—it makes me want her even more.
"What, um—" I clear my throat, my voice suddenly shrill. "What did you do? What did you think about? I mean, uh…"
I'm pretty sure my dick has taken control of my mouth now, because if I know Katniss, those questions were way too forward. Her eyes widen and her gaze drops to the flowerbeds surrounding us.
"Sorry, uh, you don't have to answer that," I quickly retract.
She scoffs, "I don't—I didn't think about anything in particular. It was more just… relaxing."
I stare at her in disbelief. She actually answered my completely inappropriate question!
She must really trust me now. I feel speechless.
"And I know what we're building up to, and, when we kiss I feel… almost hungry for more, but it's… it's a big step." She looks up at me, her expression frightened but determined. "It feels right with you, though."
"Yeah," I breathe out.
Slowly, purposefully, Katniss moves closer to me. She places one hand on my shoulder and another on my hip, and pulls on me to bring me nearer. I can feel the heat rolling off of her in waves, and when our lips touch, I feel a passion from her that I haven't felt before. I wrap my arms around her waist, and find that we're leaning back onto the ground; our bodies flush against one another.
She can definitely feel me now, and she's not shying away from it this time.
I move to kiss her chin, earlobes, and neck, and I can feel her sharp panting in my ear, particularly when I graze my lips against her collarbone. Once she even jerks involuntarily at my touch, and it spurs me on even more.
"Katniss," I whisper in her ear. "Please, show me how to touch you."
She inhales sharply at my request, and I pull back to look in her eyes. The hunger that she was talking about is very evident on her face, and she nods her head at me in consent. She sits up and I follow her lead, and after she considers how to position herself, she slowly and cautiously moves so she's sitting in between my legs with her back against my chest. I plant a light kiss on her shoulder, and she takes my hands and guides them.
One hand moves from her warm cheek down to her breast, and the other hand lays on her stomach for a while as the first hand works on her nipple, which stands at attention at my touch. She shifts me from one breast to the other, and I mimic her caressing movements as I try to keep my breathing under control.
I really hope I'm doing this right, because all of my brothers' advice has escaped me. I crane my neck around to see her face, and find her eyes closed, her mouth open, and her cheeks a beautiful shade of pink.
She is as radiant as the sun.
Encouraged by her reaction to me, I move the hand on her stomach slightly, and I feel her tense a little at the realization that there's more to come. She takes a deep breath and moves us, her hand under mine, beneath the waistband of her pants. She feels silky smooth, and I realize that she must've been waxed, like what they had done to certain parts of my body. Her hand keeps moving me further until we've reached her sensitive folds, where I suddenly remember I'll be able to find her clit, the little nub that will drive her to the edge. Together we plunge in, and I find her already so hot and wet, and her whole body shudders a little.
Lightly, gently, she moves her fingers back and forth, and I can feel that we're stroking the nub. And as her breathing becomes more erratic, the more I want to take over. Slowly I pull my hand out and then slide back in underneath hers, and I press down on her clit for the first time. Her body jolts at the touch, like I've sent an electric shock through her, and a small moan escapes her lips.
It stuns me, and makes me want to do that to her over and over just to hear it again.
The urge to have her as close to me as possible takes over. I hold her tightly and plant wet kisses all over her neck, and my other hand springs back to life and starts to move over her breasts again, and I can feel her losing control. Her moans are louder now, and her head rears back as she thrusts up into my hand. She glances over at me, and our eyes lock, and in that moment she just looks so vulnerable and desperate.
A small smile forms on her lips, and she softly pleads to me, "Peeta…"
And I don't even feel in control of my movements anymore as I lean in and kiss her hard on the mouth. Her whole body tenses as we kiss, and I hold on to her even tighter, and then I feel her relax against me.
Our lips part and she sighs heavily, "Wow."
"Yeah," I agree. I slowly remove my hands from her, and resist the urge to lick my wet fingers. I can't explain it, but I really want to taste her. I don't want to freak her out too much though, so I just wipe my hand on the back of my pants.
She turns to face me and wraps her arms around my neck, resting her forehead against mine. "You're a fast learner," she says with a smirk.
"Well you're a good teacher," I reply.
We share a few soft, warm kisses, and then she asks me shyly, "Do you, um… Can I… I want to—to make you feel that good."
All of a sudden, there is a large lump in my throat and I can't seem to speak.
She wants to…
"Uh, yeah," I choke out. "Okay… uh, let's, um, move a little…" We shift so she's sitting at my side, leaning against me with one hand on top of mine and the other wrapped around my back. I take a deep breath and glance down at her, and she nods at me reassuringly. We kiss softly as I move our hands south, moving my pants aside and releasing myself with my free hand.
I show her all the places on my body that I know will drive me over the edge—the nerves at my base, at my head, and underneath my sack. Then I move our hands to my shaft and wrap around myself. I slowly start to move up and down, and soon find that Katniss' hand has left me and is now exploring me on her own. She travels back to the spots I showed her before, experimenting with pressing and rubbing on them, and this time it's my turn to shudder.
Her lips move from my mouth to my neck and ears, and I can feel the overpowering sensation that I'm going to lose myself. I strain to keep myself from going overboard too soon, but it's hard to ignore the fact that the woman I've been having wet dreams about for years and years is finally, actually touching me. Not even thinking of dead puppies or the smell of Phyl's gym clothes can help me now. All I can think of is Katniss, Katniss, Katniss, with her lips on the spot behind my ears and her thumb moving in circles on my head, getting wet with my pre-come, and—are those her fingers playing with the hairs at the nape of my neck?
It all becomes too much, and I turn in to her and bury my head in her neck, completely losing control and groaning, "Oh, shit! Katniss!"
I make sure to angle myself so I come into my shirt and not onto her, and she holds me as I spill my load, panting heavily. Her hands move to rest on my shoulders, and she tilts her head so she can go in for a kiss. It's soft and tender, and I can feel her smiling as her lips press against mine.
I pull back and say with a sigh, "That was better than anything I've ever imagined."
"Good," she tells me, and kisses me softly again.
I carefully discard my shirt, leaving me in only an undershirt, and I think to myself how I'll have to bring a towel or something for next time—even with a light breeze, I would've liked to be able to stay bundled up.
"Are you cold?" Katniss asks me, and I realize I'm rubbing my hands up and down my arms. She scoots closer to me and puts her arms around me, and I am warmed instantly by her being so near.
"Mmm," I hum. "Not anymore. You really are a girl on fire."
She scoffs and shakes her head at my silly comment, and rests her head on my shoulder.
"Peeta," she asks, "Do you think the Avoxes know we come up here?"
"Maybe," I shrug in reply. The thought had crossed my mind once or twice that they could be used both as servants and as spies for the Gamemakers. "Why do you ask?"
"I just… The one that I know, I don't want her having leverage over me."
I look down at her with curiosity. "How do you know her?" I ask. "I mean, besides the fact that she could win a Delly Cartwright lookalike contest."
She laughs at this, and then as she remembers, her expression falls. "Well… we were hunting in the woods one day. Hidden, waiting for game."
"You and your father?" I ask.
"No, Gale and I," she answers. "Suddenly, all the birds stopped singing at once. Except one. As if it were giving a warning call. And then we saw her. I'm sure it was the same girl…. A boy was with her. Their clothes were tattered. They had dark circles under their eyes from no sleep. They were running as if their lives depended on it."
She sits in silence for a moment, staring off into the distance as if she were watching the memory flash in front of her eyes.
"The hovercraft appeared out of nowhere," she continues, looking back at me. "I mean, one moment the sky was empty and the next it was there. It didn't make a sound, but they saw it. A net dropped down on the girl and carried her up, fast—so fast, like the elevator. They… shot some sort of spear through the boy. It was attached to a cable and they hauled him up as well. But I'm certain he was dead." She stops for a moment to collect herself, and then resumes. "We heard the girl scream once. The boy's name, I think…. Then the hovercraft was gone. Vanished into thin air. And the birds began to sing again, as if nothing had happened."
"Did they see you?" I asked, wondering if Katniss thinks the Avox girl recognized her as well.
"I don't know," she replies. "We were under a shelf of rock."
I notice her tremble a little and tell her, "You're shivering." I wrap my arms more tightly around her, only being able to do so much in just an undershirt. I really need to come better prepared next time.
Once her shivering subsides, I ask her, "They were from here?" She nods in response, and I wonder out loud, "Where do you suppose they were going?"
"I don't know that," she replies, shaking her head. "Or why they would leave here."
"I'd leave here," I blurt out. And it's true, I would risk everything so that Katniss and I wouldn't have to be thrown into that arena for the Capitol's enjoyment. The whole system of them controlling who we marry and how many children to have is so fucked up, and thinking about how little freedom I have in the situation makes me more and more angry.
But I suppose without this system, Katniss and I wouldn't have had much of a chance anyway—she said so herself that she would've probably ended up with Gale if not for the Games. So I guess I do have something to be thankful for.
I wish that she and I could be together and have our freedom though.
"Although," I say, placing a kiss on the top of her head, "there are a few good things about being here."
"Yeah," she responds, understanding the meaning behind my words. "Things I never would've thought I needed back in District 12."
She needs me!
My heart feels like it's going to burst out of my chest in this moment.
Katniss suddenly pulls away, and I'm confused for a moment only until she reaches out a hand to my neck. She pulls out the chain that my locket is on, saying, "I saw this earlier. What is it?"
"Oh, let me show you," I reply. I press on the latch and the locket opens, revealing the photos of my family. "It was my grandmother's. My family wanted me to have something to remember them, in case I don't return to 12."
"I have something like that," Katniss tells me. "It's in my room. Madge gave it to me. It's a small pin with a mockingjay on it. When she gave it to me, she told me how it suited me because just like a bird, no fence could hold me."
"It does suit you," I agree. "Because you and the mockingjay can both sing so beautifully."
She lets out a sorrowful laugh, "I haven't sung in years." She then turns her attention back to my locket. "Are these your parents?" she asks.
"Yeah, that's them."
"They look so young, and your mother actually looks happy."
"That's what I thought when I saw it!" I chuckle. "I... I found out that they were paired in the Games. Apparently my whole family has been."
"Hmm, well then maybe you're like a mockingjay," Katniss teases. "Thriving, despite being the product of some absurd Capitol project."
"Am I thriving?" I ask woefully. "The Gamemakers don't think so. They think there's some inherent flaw that just won't be bred out of our family."
"Good thing you don't care what they think," she reminds me.
And it is true, that I don't care. If I cared, I wouldn't be planning to do everything in my power to pair with Katniss in the arena.
"Hey, what skill are you planning on showing the Gamemakers?" I ask.
She hesitates for a moment, and then says, "I don't know, maybe how I can bake?" She looks up at me with a smirk, and I laugh at how she has essentially adopted my plan as her own.
"Well then I'll have to show them what I can do with a bow and arrow," I retort. She snickers at me and we lose ourselves in another tender kiss. As we break apart, I whisper to her, "I want to be able to kiss you out in the open."
"Are you sure we should?" she asks.
"Sure," I reply. "Mags and Chaff do it."
"But Mags and Chaff are doing what the Gamemamkers want them to do. Find someone from another district."
I shake my head. "But neither of us want someone from another district. Right?"
"Right. Of course," she agrees adamantly.
"Then who cares? The Gamemakers can't do anything to us."
"Not until we get into the arena."
My mind starts to spin at all the odds against us in that arena: the fact that the Gamemakers weren't impressed with either of us at our first interview, that Cato is planning to go after Katniss, that there are still unknowns of who we would match well with in terms of DNA or skills. And then I think of all the good things we have going for us, like how we're already committed to only each other, or how we impressed the Capitol with our fiery costumes. Maybe we can win the hearts of some sponsors at our interviews with Caesar Flickerman…
"We can't worry about the arena right now," I tell her. "Who knows what's going to happen in the arena. Right now I just want to be able to kiss you anytime I feel like it."
And to make my point, I lean down and give her a big, sloppy kiss on the cheek.
"Ugh!" she squirms as I try and do it again, laughing and trying halfheartedly to get away. "Peeta! Stop it!"
"Aww, all right, I'll stop," I tell her with a pout.
She kisses me softly and explains; "I think it's safer if we don't look like we're a couple. We'll just fly under the radar, and then get to each other first thing in the arena, and we'll have no problems."
"That could work," I tell her sincerely. If we pair quickly in the arena, we may even be gone before Cato has a chance to get to Katniss. "Great plan, sweetheart," I tell her in my best Haymitch voice.
"Don't ever do that again," she warns, half playful and half serious. "Come on, let's go inside. It's getting cold up here."
"All right."
I grab my crusty come-covered shirt and we head back to the rooftop door and down the stairs to our floor. We are silent the entire way, back to being just two tributes from the same district, and when we reach our doors, we don't look each other in the eye.
"Well, good night," I say.
"Good night," she replies, and enters her room without a sound.
My dreams that night are filled with images of Katniss writhing under me as I slip my fingers in and out of her, as I rub over her clit and make her body quake, as she strokes me and licks the spot behind my ear…
I wake up the next morning drenched in sweat with come all over my sheets. I feel bad for the Avox who will have to launder them, especially after hearing Katniss' story last night. I try to clean them a little with a washcloth and hand soap, but it's no use.
Oh well, I'm sure they're used to the sheets of horny teenagers by now.
At breakfast, the team seems… distracted. Haymitch keeps getting up and leaving the table, and Effie looks distraught as she checks and rechecks her clipboard.
"What's the matter?" Cecilia asks.
"Nothing that concerns you, dears," Effie replies, but it doesn't have that usual singsong quality to it. It's much more grave.
What could've happened to distress even Effie Trinket?
We learn what has everyone so upset once we get to the Training Center, when Mags comes in looking disheveled with her eyes red and puffy.
"Mags, what's wrong?" Katniss asks, rushing to her.
Mags can barely speak. "It's—it's Annie."
"What about Annie?" Rue asks as she and Chaff join us.
"She—she was… was taken."
Katniss' eyes widen. "What does that mean?"
"I found her… having sex with Finnick."
Finnick Odair? Their mentor? The Single?
"And our escort was standing right there too, and he—" She can't finish, and begins sobbing again.
Katniss grabs Mags' shoulders and practically shakes her as she asks, "Mags, what did your escort do with Annie?"
"He called Seneca Crane!" Mags shrieks, and most of the other tributes look in our direction. "And a whole mess of Peacekeepers came, and took them both!"
Mags practically collapses into Katniss's arms, and Chaff steps forward to take her. "Shhh…" he says soothingly as he holds her. "Annie will be all right. They can't just get rid of a tribute halfway through the Games. She'll be back. You'll see."
Chaff and Rue guide Mags toward a platform and they sit there while Mags collects herself. I take a look at Katniss and find her expression full of fear. I reach out to comfort her, and when she notices me getting close, she shakes her head and quickly walks away, leaving me alone.
Anyone still alive out there? Let me hear from you to make sure!
