A/N: Another long chapter with Pony's POV.
Warning: Also a tear-jerker, if you guys get into emotions easily and you can actually feel how Pony feels. But, read on!
..oOo..
Another two days had passed. Tomorrow would be my release. I had mixed emotions about it; on one side, I couldn't wait to get out of here! But on the other side, I was dreading it; that social worker said that she would be the one to sign my release forms and then she would bring me to a boys' home. I know that Darry told me that he wouldn't let her do it, but it still unnerved me.
A knock at my door broke me out of my thoughts. It was eleven in the morning and I had no visitors right now. I told whoever knocked to come in, and lemme tell you what my surprise was when I saw none other than two Socs!
I backed away from them as much as I could, feeling a stab of pain in my chest, but I ignored it; I was scared stiff. What were they doing here?
The second one noticed my expression. "Don't worry, we aren't here to hurt you." That's when it hit me; these were the Socs that had tried to drown me that night!
"What makes you think I'm gonna believe you, uh?" I said, and I cursed myself for sounding so scared and so weak. The first Soc took a step forward.
"Look, we came here to apologize. We know about what happened to you after we...drowned you. We knew you were still here and so we just came here to talk." I scoffed.
"A Soc apologizing to a greaser. I'll believe it 'cause it makes a whole lot of sense," I muttered sarcastically. They both sighed.
"We find it weird as much as you do, kid, but we really mean it. We didn't think of our actions that night when you were underwater. We were drunk, and we were mad that you picked on our girls."
"S'not like I knew they had overprotective boyfriends," I muttered, and the first one glared at me, but the second one cut him before he could say something harsh. After all, they were here to "apologize". Weren't they?
"We really didn't mean to hurt you like that. We didn't know about the consequences it would bring. We didn't think." I sat up.
"Well, y'know what? I lost my parents eight months ago and my brother keeps chewing me out 'cause "I don't think". Look where that brought me. You could've been in a much worse situation, and maybe me too. Next time, think 'fore acting," I spat, and the two Socs stopped, shocked.
Finally, the first one took a step forward. I shrank back. "Well kid, maybe you're right, but don't go telling people that we didn't do anything to solve the situation." With that said, he glared at me and walked out of the room. I just stared at the door.
The other Soc sighed. "Don't mind him, he's always like that." He paused, and then he extended his hand to mine. "My name's Randy. Randy Anderson." I debated on shaking his hand or spitting at him, but I decided I would shake his hand. He seemed nice enough. A Soc apologizing to a greaser convinced me that he wasn't like the others.
"Bob, he's just jealous of greasers. True, maybe some of you learn to live without parents, and true, maybe some of you have it rough. But for us, our parents spoil us, especially Bob's. He wants them to tell him "no", but they never do. And some of our parents, they literally have our future planned. Alex's mother wants him to be a doctor. He doesn't want to, but she almost forced him to have high grades to become a doctor later on in his life."
"The thing is, we're somewhat jealous of you. I know it's hard to live without parents, but otherwise that, you're kinda free to do what you want. And don't mention that to anyone, but some of the Socs are jealous of you, as an individual, and not only just as a Greaser. I mean, you have no parents to bug you, and you have some of the highest grades in the class, and you run track, and some Socy girls talk about you like you have no idea. You're oblivious to all of it." I was shocked at that, but he kept talking.
"And some Socs would like to run track, or do sports, but their parents don't want them to. Ironic, isn't it?"
I couldn't agree more. "Yeah, it is. My mom and dad always wanted my brothers and I to be sportive, active. My oldest brother, Darry; he was a football player. He had to forget college in order to take care of my brother and I, so he couldn't go in the football team. As for my brother Sodapop, he used to ride in rodeos and he loves horses and sometimes he plays football with us in the lot, but he doesn't have a sport in particular.'
I didn't even know why I was telling Randy all that; I found it ironic that I was telling stuff about my family to a Soc. But somehow, Randy was just like Johnny; he could force the words out of my mouth without doing anything.
Randy smiled. "That's a big part of why Socs hate greasers, and greasers hate Socs. It isn't because of the fact that we're rich and that you're poor. I know that some of the Socs taunt you because of that, but they hate you because of your freedom." At this, I sighed.
"We ain't all free, y'know. My brother Sodapop, he got arrested 'cause he was doing cartwheels on the sidewalk. And I can't do everything I want; Darry's stricter than my parents were when they were alive. And my parents, they were the best parents a guy like me could ask for. They didn't push me, but they didn't forget me like most of the greasers' parents do. I was never abused either."
I felt a pang in my heart when I said that. Darry hit me. And I told the social worker, 'cause I was scared that she would find out on her own, and that she would tell Darry that he was raising us to be liars, and that she would send me away, only to find out that Darry had lied to her about it, and I possibly made it worse. A few tears escaped my eyes, and I felt stupid for crying in front of Randy, but I couldn't help it. I didn't want to get separated from the only family I had left.
"You miss them, uh, kid?" Randy asked, mistaking my tears for me missing my parents. I didn't feel like explaining to him the real reason behind my tears, so without thinking, I nodded and burst into tears. I mentally scolded myself for acting so babyish in front of a Soc, but really, I didn't care.
Surprisingly, I felt his hand on my shoulders. I looked up and sure enough, he was the one patting my shoulder in a comforting way.
"I can relate, kid. I lost my mother too, when I was ten years old. Trust me, it sure wasn't easy. And my father is strict too. But, it's been six years now, and I feel much better, much happier. Give it some time, kid, and you'll feel better." With that said, he turned around.
"Wait, Randy!" I said, choking a little on my tears. He was at the door. He turned back.
"Yeah?" he said with a hint of curiosity. I smiled.
"Thanks. I-I forgive you." He smiled back.
"Sure. Talk to you at school, kid." He left the room, leaving me alone in it.
A couple of minutes later, Soda came in with, surprisingly, Steve. He probably noticed that I had tear tracks on my face, 'cause he sat next to my and brushed them off with the back of his hand.
"Ponyboy, were you crying?" he asked, obviously worried. I nodded.
"But I'm okay now," I said and smiled. He grinned and ruffled my hair.
"How was your day, Pony? You weren't too bored, were you?" Soda asked. He knew me too well; he wasn't oblivious to the fact that I hated staying put in the hospital. In fact, all the guys in the gang knew, as well as some of my friends from track. I made it clear to them the day I sprained my ankle and had to get it checked out at the hospital. They had asked me if I was fine, and I cussed at them about how useless I found my visit to the hospital. Boy, their faces that day were hilarious.
"Uh, Soda? We gotta talk." I eyed Steve and then looked at Soda again. "Alone." Luckily, Steve understood, and left the room. As soon as he did, Soda closed the door and sat back down by my side.
"What's the matter, Pony?" he asked me, concerned.
"I, uh…The Socs visited me today. The same ones that…drowned me that day."
"They WHAT?!" he screamed, shooting out of his seat. His scream made me flinch; I had never seen him so mad, even that time when he raved to Steve and Two-Bit that he would beat the Socs who jumped me from the movies. That was the day before the fountain accident…
I shivered, and he quickly sat down and slung his arm across my shoulder. "Sorry, Pony. I didn't mean to scare you like this." He smiled, but it faded quickly. "What were they doing here? It wasn't their business to visit you."
"Look, believe it or not, Soda, they came to apologize…" I started, but he was practically glaring at me.
"Ponyboy Curtis, don't give me that crap!" he said, and I flinched away again. But this time, he didn't apologize about it. "They wouldn't apologize to you or another greaser for that matter. Heck, they drowned you! They nearly killed you! Not to mention that…"
"YOU cut that crap, Soda!" I said, interrupting him, and he stared at me wide-eyed. "He DID apologize! He told me the Socs were jealous 'cause their parents were always on their cases, that they were never free! He told me the Socs were spoiled and they hated it!" He blew in my face.
"And you honestly BELIEVE what he said?! Of all the times we were cussed at 'cause we were poor? And he told you that we were cussed at 'cause we were FREE?! Well, we sure as hell ain't free!" I was starting to cry again, but it was out of anger.
"Don't you think I know that? I TOLD him that's what I thought too, but he said he never meant it! He said that the Socs were jealous of me 'cause I had good grades and could run track, while some of their parents didn't want them into sports!"
"THAT AIN'T TRUE AND YOU KNOW IT!" he screamed, and shoved me, his hand hitting my chest where I had a bandage. My breath caught in my throat, and I coughed, feeling pain in my chest, as if Soda had crushed it.
He stared at his hands with wide eyes and looked at me. "Pony, I…"
My chin was quivering. "Just…get out," I said, barely above a whisper. My chest throbbed, and my heart was beating fast.
"Ponyboy, I didn't mean to…"
"Get out, get out, please just go…" I said, scooting away from him and crying, my head buried in my arms, which were holding my knees. Since I scooted away, he took that as a sign that I wanted him to sit down next to me, and he did, holding me in his arms. I struggled against him.
"No, Soda let me go! I don't want you here, get out!" I said, but he held tighter, and I burst into tears for the second time that day.
"Ponyboy, I'm so-so sorry for doing that to you... I'm no better than Darry...Please just forgive me kiddo, I didn't mean to, I...Calm down and breathe, and let me hold you. Please, Pony..."
I nodded against his chest as I sobbed. He rubbed my back and I clung to him like a little child. I couldn't help but feel angry at myself for crying so much; it seemed like that's all I did these last days. But these last days had taken their toll on me. I was tired of fighting.
"Soda, I'm just so scared that Randy wasn't right. He seemed so sincere and so nice. A-And I'm so tired of fighting, I don't want to fight anymore. Please, Soda, I don't want you to be mad at me or at the Socs," I said, and he shook his head, brushing my hair away from my face.
"I could never be mad at you, Pony. I...I honestly didn't mean to blow at you, I...I believe you, baby bro. Please forgive me..."
I nodded, choking out that I did forgive him, only that it hurt. And I wasn't just tired of fighting; I was literally tired.
Soda noticed this. He noticed everything about my emotions or how I acted. "Just sleep, Pony. You're gonna feel better when you wake up."
Soda's soothing voice easily lulled me to sleep, and the last thing I saw before closing my eyes and drifting away was his teary smile and his watery eyes staring at me.
