AN: I've spent three days trying to work this chapter out correctly. I hope it works for you guys! Thanks again everyone for reviewing this story. I am truly humbled.
Gearing up for his hunt, probably his final hunt, because after killing his brother, he wanted out of this game, if that meant letting Castiel send him back to hell, then so be it, he deserved to be there, because he was about to kill the single most important person ever to enter his life. His hands shook, literally shook, he watched them with interest, because never before in his hunting career had his hands shook. Not the day he came face to face with the Yellow Eyed Demon, not the day he came face to face with his own death, and not the day that Alistair came from Hell and flung him and Sam about. Fear, was something he was good at using against the enemy. But now, he starred in amazement as his hands shook. He was really going to do this. He was really going to kill his brother, because he failed Sam, he hadn't been able to save him. By dying, by saving his brother's mortal life, he had condemned his eternal one, and Dean had to believe that by killing his brother he would be saving lives, and averting the apocalypse. He had to believe that or there was no point in continuing.
"You ready son?" Bobby asked startling Dean out of his thoughts. Dean straightened, zipped up his bag, threw it on his shoulder and turned.
"I'm ready."
"Am I riding with you?"
"I don't want you to come Bobby."
"But son,"
"I don't want you to witness this…I don't…." He stopped, not quite sure what he wanted to say after that. He shrugged.
"But when it's over. You will need some help transporting him back here for the cremation."
"No. If I'm going to end his life, then I'm going to be the one responsible for taking care of the body." Dean said and started towards the door, and stopped in front of Bobby.
"Dean. What…"
"When I get back, I'm not hunting anything ever again. Once I take my brother out…." He shook his head and his lips puckered out as he tried not to cry. "Once that's done. I'm done. I can't live this life anymore, and I can't live it without Sammy anymore. I can't Bobby. Once he's gone, demons will have taken my entire family. And if Castiel," Dean laughed a sad laugh. "If he wants to throw me back into the pitt, then so be it. I can't do this. Just can't."
"Cass won't send you back Dean. I know he won't."
"Whatever. I don't really care. I deserve to be there, especially after what I'm about to do. Excuse me Bobby." He pushed past Bobby and into the hall.
"You know where he is?" Bobby asked finally.
"Yeah I do. I put something in the engine of the Impala that I can track. One single place he would never think to look." Bobby shook his head.
"That's why you left the car?"
"Yeah." Dean said sadly. "I had to keep an eye on him, even if it was from a distance."
"So you knew he was coming here? That last time?"
"Yeah, knew it. Was prepared for it." Dean nodded, adjusted the duffel on his shoulder and sighed. "See you around Bobby."
Bobby watched sadly as Dean walked down the stairs, and he fell against the doorframe when he heard his door shut. His boys, his family, was about to die. Once Sam was dead, Dean, even if his body and soul remained on Earth, would be destroyed. Bobby rubbed his hand down his face and sighed. He was about to lose them both, all at the same time. Maybe it was time he hang up his boots, call it a day, and just die.
***
Dean drove and drove. A turn here, a turn there, a stop for gas, a stop for food, a stop to throw up the food, a stop to rest on the side of the road and contemplate exactly what it was he was doing, a stop to sleep, a stop to pee, and a final stop, the stop that would lead him inside the abandoned building where his brother was residing, and the final stop for his life. Dean got out of the car, went to the trunk and retrieved one weapon, his gun, his favorite gun, and slammed it shut, not caring if anyone heard it, not caring if Sam heard him coming.
He took a deep breath, and proceeded into the run down house that probably at one point housed a lovely family, it was only fitting that Sam would die in a house, where a family once resided, a normal family, a family like the one that Sam had wanted growing up, a house like the one Dean had never been able to provide for his brother, a house that was broken, like Dean was, a house that was run down and dirty, like Sam was. It truly was the perfect venue for Sam's final hour, and the decimation of Dean's soul. Whatever Alistair had started in the pitt, Dean would finish the moment he pulled the trigger against the base of Sam's skull. Dean didn't even bother hiding the weapon, he carried it naked in his right hand and walked up to the door. He didn't even bother knocking, he kicked it open, and it fell right down. Inside, was not what he expected. Sam was huddled on the floor, his long legs bunched up around his face and shoulders, and his arms covering his face. His body was shaking. Dean fortified himself. This was surly a trick. A demon trick, they knew that he was coming. Ruby was probably waiting in the wings, just waiting for Dean to kneel down in front of Sammy, put a hand on his shaking shoulder and ask him if he was okay.
"Dean?" Sam asked as he lifted his head.
"Sam."
"Dean, I didn't mean to." He blurted.
"I know Sammy. I know you didn't mean to do it." Sam saw the gun in his brother's hand and his eyes lifted to Dean's. A fat tear rolled down his face. Flashes of a ten year old Sammy with those same tears strolling down his face after a bad skinned knee, of a 15 year old Sammy when the girl of his dreams refused to go out with a transient poor bastard, and of a 22 year old Sammy when the love of his life died in a tragic demon inspired fire. He gave himself a mental shake, clear his mind of those images, because Sammy no longer existed. He had been eaten alive by demon blood and conniving demons.
"What's that for Dean?" he asked.
"I came to help." Dean said cryptically. Sam's body continued to shake and he looked down at the gun in his brother's hand and then back to his eyes.
"Help?"
"I came to set you free Sammy." Dean said quietly, his voice was starting to betray just how much this was bothering him.
"You came to kill me."
"I came to do what Dad told me to do."
"You came to put a bullet in my brain. Dean….I didn't mean to kill him." Sam's voice was starting to hold a hysterical note to it. "He was like Gordon. He came after me. Found out about me and Ruby."
"I don't believe you Sam."
"It's true Dean. It's true. I didn't want to kill him. I didn't want to hurt him. He was a hunter, God, he was a friend of ours, I didn't want to. I didn't want to do it Dean. You have to believe me. Please. I'm your brother."
"And you are a demon. Demons lie."
"I am not a demon. Dean I promise, I'm not! I didn't go after that hunter."
"That's what happened when Meg possessed you." Dean raised the gun so it was pointed at Sam's head.
"Dean. I swear. Please. Please believe me. Please." Tears started rolling at a more frantic pace, and he was pale and he wouldn't quit shaking.
"Sammy, I can't believe you anymore. I just can't." Dean steadied himself and was just about to pull the trigger when Sam flicked his wrist and the gun was out of his hands and on the floor. Dean stood up straighter and looked at his brother with horror.
"I can't let you kill me Dean. I can't." Sam said still sobbing. "I'm not a demon."
"What the hell did you just do then? Put a magnet in my gun?" he asked and before Sam knew what he was about, Dean had him by the throat. "Go ahead, use your demon powers, go ahead pull my soul out of my body through my mouth. Do it you son of a bitch." Dean seethed.
"I wouldn't do that to you Dean." Sam said shakily.
"But you could do it." Sam's eyes went wide realizing what he said to his brother. "Admit it you little bastard. Admit it!"
"I could."
"You are just a liar." He said with such anger and betrayal that Sam could feel it burning along his skin.
"Dean, I didn't…"
"Save it for a hunter that's dumb enough to buy the crap you are selling." Dean reached back and pulled a knife from the back of his jeans and just as he was about to sail the knife home he was thrown from Sam's body.
Dean shook the cobwebs out of his head long enough to see Ruby strolling towards him. "You are just a pain in the ass Dean." Dean tried to scramble to all fours, and move backwards.
"Ruby! No!" Sam called from the other side struggling to get his long legs underneath him. Ruby's hand went up and she smiled, that evil smile, and flung Dean against the wall, enjoying the sound of his body connecting with the wall, and the subsequent sound of his body crumple to the floor.
"You think you're tough." Ruby said as she inched closer to Dean. "You think you can do whatever you want, because he's your brother? Well think again. He's more demon now than he is your brother." She said quietly. "What do you think it is you are doing, anyway? Being a good little soldier and following your daddy's orders? Yeah, that's exactly what you are doing, because you are pathetic and weak Dean. You always have been, and you always will…" she stopped because there was a tickle in the back of her throat. She coughed a little and swallowed. She turned around and saw Sam standing, weak, eyes blazing, and trying to pull her out of her meat suit.
"Leave my brother alone." She smiled.
"You really aren't even trying that hard Sam. Just like you didn't try that hard to resist me in the first place, you didn't even try hard to keep from killing that hunter." She laughed and grabbed his arm and pushed it down. "That's a good boy Sammy. That's a good boy. She leaned in and kissed him. "That's my good Sammy." She purred and petted his hair away from his face.
Dean seethed. Dean watched as his brother was being manipulated, turned into a demon, by a bitch he knew he should have killed in the light of the Impala's headlights those many many nights ago.
"Leave him alone." Dean finally managed to wheeze.
"Oh baby, he's mine now." She said as she looked away from Sam's slack features. She gestured towards Sam. "See, completely under my spell. In a little bit, he will do exactly as I say. Remember when he did that for you? Remember when you were the driving force in his life?" she started towards him and laugh. "Well hot shot. Look at him now. If I were you. I'd run before Sammy got his groove back on, because he can pull anything that has been in hell out of its meat suit and send it back." Dean's eyes widened. Her face was mere inches from his. He could feel her breath, smell the sulfur radiating off of her body. "Looks like that means he can rip you out and send you back to hell too buddy. You might want to get the hell out of here while the getting's good."
"I'm going to kill you." Dean said low and threatening.
"Oh, even with your angels on your shoulder, you aren't ever going to hurt a hair on my head." She laughed. "Now get the fuck up and leave this place, leave me to it. You aren't his protector any longer. You failed Dean. You failed."
Dean scrambled up and like a coward he left. He hurried out to the Impala and drove away.
"Sam! Sam! Are you okay?" Ruby asked frantically. He snapped out of the trance he was in and looked around.
"Where's Dean?"
"He left. Said you weren't worth it."
"What?"
"He said that he didn't want to waste his time on you."
"That doesn't sound right Ruby." She shrugged.
"God only knows what those angels are doing to his head." She sighed. Her hold over Sam, broke the last.
